Chapter Twenty-One - Elea

“You bastard!” the petite woman yelled and raised her hand to deliver a sound slap to Zenon’s face.

Zenon stumbled backwards, his eyes trained on Elea.

She was still beautiful. After all these years he hadn’t seen her - she hadn’t lost any of her splendor. For a moment, he could just stare at her, not even feeling the sting of her slap.

She still was the woman he loved more than anything.

“How dare you show up here like that?” she screamed and hit him in the chest, even though she didn’t actually hurt him, “How dare you come after five years and show your face here?”

Her words sunk into his brain and the pain he kept repressed for so long flooded over.

“Elea, I…” he tried to say something, anything, but words deserted him.

He wanted to tell her about everything, how sorry he was, how much he loved her, but in her presence, all of the flimsy reasons he had made up in the last days of travel ran away from his tongue the moment he opened his mouth.

“What? You can’t even say something?” her voice reached a higher octave as she glared up at him, tears swimming in her eyes. He could feel them rising in his, too.

Even when she was furious at him, she was still the most beautiful person he’d ever seen. By all high gods, how had he ever managed to leave her?

Oh, right. By killing her family and her friends.

“Elea, I...I’m sorry,” his voice broke as he spoke the words that had been weighing down his chest for five years. He looked straight into her molten gold eyes, the colour of a sunrise, even though right now, they could've been a supernova as well.

“Oh you’re sorry. You’re sorry, after five effing years of not showing up, of not showing your face, of making me thing you were dead, now you’re sorry? No, Zenon, it doesn’t work like that,” she shook her head and even though tears were running down her cheeks, she was blazing.

“You know what?” she continued, not leaving him an opportunity to answer, “Just leave. You left five years ago, so you can sure as hell leave now!”

Her words tore into his heart, ripping it to shreds. But he knew they were all truth. He left her - he left her because he thought she would hate him and now she hated him because he left. No matter how he looked at it, it was all his fault.

All because he had been so damn stupid those five years ago.

Why was he even here?

Damn Arette for bringing him here. The girl had become his friend, sure enough, but he shouldn’t have let her bring hope in his heart. It was clear as day that Elea still despised him.

Nonetheless, when he looked at her, all he could feel was love and guilt at causing her such pain. Five years hadn’t diminished his feelings even by the smallest margin.

“I know, I screwed up. I know it’s my fault. It’s all my fault,” he confessed, his head hanging in shame, but at the end he forced himself to look up to her. She was shining, like the goddess she’d always been to him, not the Sovereign she was.

“Five years ago...I made a mistake. It’s my fault they died. I know. I know you hate me for that...you have every right to. I hate myself too.”

He choked on the words as he remembered that day, five years ago, when their happiness went up in flames and screams. All his fault. They all died because of him.

How could he face her after that? After causing something so atrocious?

Yes, how could he have given up on her so easily? Was what he did right?

The moment he had seen that video of Elea and the other guy...he’d suddenly questioned everything. And now she stood in front of him and he could say nothing but empty words.

“Zenon, I don’t hate you for what happened five years ago,” her voice, now a little softer, chimed like music through the air, “I don’t even blame you. But you left. You left without saying a word, leaving me behind. I was supposed to be your companion! Your soul companion! I would’ve followed you, despite everything that happened. But you left. You left me.”

Her voice quivered and broke and the end. Zenon’s head snapped up and met the raw pain in her expression and felt like someone had rammed a sword into his chest.

Breathing suddenly seemed harder as he choked on his feelings, his guilt, the unimaginable guilt.

There it was, the answer.

What he did was the opposite of right. Leaving had ruined everything instead of saving it. He had hoped to save what little was left of him by not confronting her rejection, but his cowardly move might have cost him everything.

Regret like he never felt before rushed through him.

“Why did you come back, Zenon?” Elea asked with a tiny voice, tears shining in her eyes, “Why? Why now? Is it because I want to bond with someone else? Is that it?”

A low, animalistic growl vibrated in his chest as he heard her speaking of someone else. Jealousy, one he had no right to possess, flooded into him. Despite everything, a part of him considered Elea to be his, his alone. Just as he was still hers and had never been any other’s in the last five years.

“Does he make you happy?” he asked with a rough voice. If she said yes, he’d leave. He’d let her break his heart into tiny little fragments and walk back with them stabbing into his flesh for the rest of his potentially unlimited life. If she said yes, none of that would matter.

But she didn’t say yes.

Instead, she darted away from his gaze.

“Does he make you happy?” he asked again, this time with more insistence, eyes firmly fixed on her, “Does he make you as happy as we were back then?”

“Of course he doesn’t!” Elea screamed and then clasped her hand in front of her mouth. “I shouldn’t have said that.”

She paled and took a step back. Away from him. It still stung, this little, unconscious rejection, it stung more than her slap to his face. Zenon stared at her, hope eating like flames into his guts.

“Yes you should have said that!” he protested and couldn’t help but stretch his hand out to her. When he realized what he’d done, he let it fall again, even though he wanted nothing more than to hold her close.

“No, I shouldn’t,” her voice was cold, though still quivering, “This is none of your business. Who I am bonding with and why is no longer any of your concern. You lost that right when you left me five years ago!”

She was in defensive mode, one Zenon knew very well from when they had fought before. It was a point where none of his words could reach her and she wouldn’t let anything touch her, an iron armour around her heart. In the past, he would’ve known what to do to coax her out of it...but now…

This was far more than just a fight.

It was a war, he feared, and one he might have already lost.

“Elea, please…” What he was begging of her, he didn’t know. One last chance?

He was ready to fall to his knees and beg for her forgiveness, but he knew that she wouldn’t appreciate that any more than his apologies. Instead, he hung onto her eyes like a dying man onto a cliff, praying she wouldn’t push him off.

He could see the hesitation in her eyes, the pain that tore her apart as it tore at him. Like she wanted to give into him, but couldn’t. Was truly something holding her back?

She said the guy didn’t make her happy. Was he one that made her sad then? Did he have some hold over her that forced her hand?

The longer she held his gaze, the more his tentative hope grew.

And the more it hurt when she smashed it apart.

“I can’t, Zenon. You left me when I needed you the most. You can’t just come back when it’s convenient for you or when, gods forbid, I actually move on. Leave, Zenon. I don’t want to see you again. Ever.”

Her gaze turned rock hard and he could almost hear his hold slip and his heart plunge into an infinite chasm. That was it. The rejection he wanted to avoid five years ago.

He now knew why he was so scared of it.

It hurt more than any wound he’d ever received combined.

It hurt so much that he wanted to bawl like a little girl, but despite everything, he still had his pride. He gave her one last pleading glance, filled with all the pain her words had caused him, but she only shook her head.

“Alright,” he rasped, his voice nearly breathless, “I’ll leave you alone.”

The words were bricks on his tongue, tearing everything apart as he spoke them and Elea didn’t look happy at all as he forced them out. In fact, she looked just as heartbroken as he felt.

He couldn’t help but say one last thing.

“Elea...I’ve never stopped loving you. I love you. I’ll always love you. Just...remember that,” he said and then turned on his heel and walk away, lest he really start crying.

With every step, though, the grief bled out of his feet.

What remained was an all consuming emptiness in the place his heart had been.

Well, he guessed, he would have to get used to that from now on.

Damn Arette for bringing him here.

Arette, meanwhile, was firmly held back by Liz, whose grip on her arm was tight enough to cause bruises. She’d wanted to interfere into the fight the entire time - mostly to bash Elea’s head into a rock - but Liz had bravely held her back, insisting that the two of them had to sort it out on their own.

Arette understood that - but it didn’t make it any easier to sit still.

Now, Zenon had left and she was about to spew insults at Elea, but before she could do anything, the young woman suddenly broke down on her knees and began to sob violently.

As if a storm she’d held in suddenly broke free, Elea began to cry out loud, tears streaking over her face in angry trails. Arette was stunned, gaping at the woman that had just cold-heartedly sent Zenon away.

Seeing her like this, Arette couldn’t find it in her to hold onto her anger.

Elea’s light filled flame was surrounded by darkness and scars, just as deep as Zenons, if not deeper. Gingerly, Arette stepped close to her, wanting to comfort her, to say something, anything, but once again, her intentions were interrupted.

This time, by the sound of footsteps.

All three of them jerked up and turned in the direction, seeing three silhouettes making their way to Elea’s little cottage. Zenon’s soul companion panicked, eyes darting around and falling onto Arette and Liz, who were just standing there without really an idea what to do.

“You need to hide,” Elea hissed and hastily wiped her tears from her face. She shooed them towards the trees, into bushes high enough to hide the two of them.

Arette frowned and was about to refuse - she still needed to yell at Elea after all - but Liz had already grabbed her sleeve and pulled her behind them before she could say anything.

“What? Why do we need to hide?” she hissed towards Liz.

“Didn’t you see her earlier?” Liz gave back quietly, “It’s not just that she’s angry at Zenon. There’s something else and I think we’re about to witness it firsthand.”

Arette blinked and looked at her best friend, clearly stunned. She wouldn’t have thought that far...but then again, Liz was a lot smarter than her to begin with.

So they held their breaths and watched as three men approached Elea. Two of them looked brutish and by their flames, Arette knew them to be hardened and seasoned fighters, both of their souls kept in a tightly curled ball that let no feelings in or out.

The third, smallest man of the group was different.

She immediately recognized him as the man from the recording Zenon had showed them, the man who wanted to bond Elea. Yet, when he approached the young woman, there was no love in his eyes nor his flame.

There was only greed in his expression and lust and his flame was permanently hungry because of both. Arette sneered at she saw him, immediately disliking him.

He approached Elea and even though the woman stiffed and retreated a small step, he drew her against him and pressed a kiss on her lips. Arette angrily watched the darkness tighten its hold around Elea’s light filled flame.

Liz was right. This wasn’t just anger at Zenon - this was fear and resignation, mixed in the worst way possible. Again, she wanted to jump up, but this time held herself back. They needed to know more before she acted.

The man finally released Elea after three or four excruciating seconds and she looked only incredibly disgusted instead of madly in love.

“I see you remembered what I told you last time,” the man drawled and petted Elea’s cheek, who unconsciously took another step back. He clicked his tongue in disapproval.

“Ah-ah, don’t you dare reject me now. Or do you want your brother to have another unfortunate...incident?”

He grinned as Elea paled and hastily shook her head.

“Good girl. Now get ready for tomorrow. I put up a great effort to stage it as if you were becoming truly my lover,” he laughed as if the very notion was ridiculous. Arette pressed her hands into firsts, already calculating where to land her first blow. In his face, probably. Yeah, face was a good idea.

“Please don’t hurt my brother,” Elea pleaded, tears swimming in her eyes. The dark tendrils around her flame squeezed, as if wanting to put out the fire that burned inside of her.

“Oh don’t worry. If you become mine tomorrow and are obedient, the cripple won’t be harmed. As for you...I can’t exactly say the same,” he snickered and looked at her with lust leering in his eyes, then abruptly turned around to stalk off. His goons glared at Elea for another second, then turned around to accompany their master as well.

As soon as they were out of sight, Arette jumped out of the bushes and walked over to Elea, who was shivering like a leaf by now. Softly, she put a hand on the young woman’s shoulder, who looked up to her with panic and shame.

“Who- who are you?” Elea asked weakly, not pushing her hand away. By now, Liz had also walked out to stand by Arette, her expression one of pity and hesitation.

“My name is Arette. I’m a friend of Zenon’s, I actually convinced him to get his ass here to talk to you,” she grinned awkwardly as she introduced herself.

As soon as she spoke Zenon’s name, Elea dissolved into tears again.

“You love him, don’t you? Despite what you said?” Arette questioned even though she already knew the answer. The devotion and deep love was buried under Elea’s scars, but it was part of her very core, not something that could be erased with time.

Hesitating, Elea looked up at her, but in her already drained state, she didn’t work up anger anymore. Instead, she gave her a small, almost not visible nod.

“Of course I do,” she whispered, clutching her shirt right over her heart with a trembling hand, “I’m so angry at him for leaving but...but...I always wished for him to come back. I always waited, every day, waited for this day. And now that he’s here...I can’t…”

Her voice broke and Arette was overcome with sympathy for a stranger, a girl she didn’t even know but felt connected to, mostly because she was the true love of someone she cared about.

“Your brother?” she asked softly, trying not to startle Elea with the anger that bubbled up inside of her, the audacity of the thought that someone would threaten such a fragile, yet brave young woman.

Elea nodded again, trying to wipe her tears but new ones kept coming.

“He was wounded in the raid five years ago...he hasn’t been able to walk ever since. I used to take care of him, but…” she stopped to take a deep breath, then continued, “Harker always wanted me. He made his advances shortly after Zenon left, but I always rejected him until a few months ago, he found out about my brother. He....he took him away from me. He wants me to accept a bond of slavery, poses it as if he was bonding with me out of love, saying that otherwise...well, you heard it.”

Elea buried her face in her hands and Arette turned away to kick against the trunk of a nearby tree.

“Fucking shit,” she cursed, overcome by anger for the man who had driven such a lovely girl so far.

But as she thought about it, an idea entered her mind.

“So, if your brother was free, you wouldn’t bond with this Harker guy and instead give Zenon another chance?” she asked, eyes gleaming with a forming plan.

Elea was visibly confused, but then gave a bitter smile.

“Zenon is my soul companion. Of course I’d give him another chance,” she whispered, “If he still wanted me after what I just did.”

Arette grinned.

“Oh don’t you worry about that,” she chuckled and patted Elea on the shoulder, “I’ll handle it. As long as you don’t reject him again, everything will be fine.”

“What? Nothing will be fine!” Elea exclaimed, but Arette dismissed her with a simple wave.

“I’ll handle it,” she assured again and then turned to Liz.

Her best friend looked like she already knew what was coming and was resigned.

“You’re thinking what I think you’re thinking, aren’t you?” Liz asked with a sigh and Arette grinned even brighter.

“You’re damn right.”