This Isn’t My World, And It Pisses Me Off

Chapter 9

“This place does not have omurice.” Ikari thought, poking at some steak and sausages. Madyline was happily digging in, clearly a big fan of the food here. They had left the castle grounds, Ikari for the first time seeing the world outside the castle.

It reminded him of the bare bones build of a game he was working on before being sent here. He based it on old German towns where you would go around fighting creatures from storybooks. He was annoyed he never got to finish the game.

Madyline brought him to a building seemingly better cared for than the others. A thatched brown roof with cobbled walls and a smoke stack in use. It looked homely.

“Did you only choose here because you liked the food here?” Ikari asked, stabbing a sausage with a fork. That also felt weird, the lack of chopsticks.

Madyline halted in bringing a piece of food to her mouth. “Nooo.” She answered, refusing to look Ikari in the eye. The unwilling hero breathed out through his nose, before taking a bite of his sausage.

“Oh damn.” His eyes widened as he looked down at the food. It was good.

“The cook here has a level 20 Cooking Skill.” Madyline said rather proudly. Ikari looked around the tavern he was in. It wasn’t a restaurant by any means, at least not how he knew it.

Up at the bar were several gruff looking men drinking from massive steel tankards while wielding even bigger weapons. It made Ikari feel somewhat emasculated. Several patrons were dining happily, though a fair amount of them were giving him side eyes.

The gears in his mind turned for a few moments, staring at the Menu that was given to him when he sat down. When he tried to read it a translator screen popped up, informing him of the price and food. He closed the screen and stared at the menu.

Where the screen showed the price, they were written on a piece of white paper as opposed to the light red of the menu. He scratched slightly at the price, and the corner of it peeled off. The price for his meal was three silver.

However, once the white paper was removed, the price said one silver. So for some reason the menu he was given was more expensive than the base menu. And people kept looking at him like he was to blame for something.

The only people who weren’t paying attention to him were those in front of a set of notice boards, each board almost completely covered in large pieces of paper. Ikari paled as he realised where he was. “Madyline…” He began softly, the young girl looking up with innocence. “Is this a guild hall?”

“Hm? Oh, yeah it is. A lot of adventurers are situated here. They even-” There was a clinking of metal and Madyline looked up to see Ikari missing from the table, three gold coins spinning on the table.

“Hero Sir!” Madyline yelled out, running out of the hall and into a bustling street. She saw people making a wide berth, Ikari stalking down the street getting as far away from the guild hall as possible.

Madyline rushed after him, panting slightly once she got to the point where they were talking in tandem. “Why did you leave? The guild hall is renowned for producing strong adventurers and worthy quests!”

“I left because if I have to hear an explanation on how the quests are ranked from E to S one more time I’m going to break something.” He looked around for a moment, before heading into a small shop.

Madyline quickly followed, entering the empty store and realising why he had come here. “How many rings do you have for sale here?” Ikari asked the man behind the counter.

It was an elderly looking man with a somewhat bald head. “Oh, looking for some decorations are you.” He asked, coming down from a ladder while his back was to Ikari. He turned, wearing a smile that was practiced in greeting customers.

The smile fell once his dark brown eyes fell on Ikari. “Oh, a Hero has graced my shop with his presence.” The tone was accusatory, which cemented the idea that Ikari had been building in his head.

“Alright,” He sighed, placing his hands on his hips and staring at the shopkeep. “How much did the King increase taxes to help me?”

Both Madyline and the Shopkeeps jaw dropped. “H-How did you know that?” Madyline stammered.

“Wait you knew?” Ikari turned to her in surprise. Madyline took a step back in guilt.

“The King has a law.” She said quietly. “And, if we break the law we are punished severely.”

“What’s the law?” Ikari asked. Madyline shook her head, tears stinging at the edge of her eyes.

“We are not to tell the Hero anything that may discourage them from defeating the Demon King.” The two whirled around to see the shopkeep standing up straighter than he had before, looking at Ikari critically.

“Alright. I’m going to punch the purple off that guys cloak.” He made to turn around, but Madyline pressed her hands against his stomach to prevent him from leaving.

It was not very effective, as the maid ended up being pushed along with Ikari. “Don’t! It’s treason!” She warned.

“You’re a different kind of Hero, ain’t ya?” The elderly shopkeep spoke, causing Ikari to turn and Madyline to fall flat on her front.

“Huh. It didn’t hurt.” She murmured from the ground. Ikari helped her up while looking at the shopkeep.

“So, you don’t seem to mind breaking this law.” Ikari stepped closer, only the small counter separating the two. “Why’s that?”

“Well, that girl clearly wanted to tell you, but she has a long life ahead of her.” He nodded to Madyline. “Me, I’ve been around awhile. I don’t mind breaking the laws of a King I think is an inbred idiot.”

Madyline gasped at the words, but Ikari gave a short laugh. “Well, I’m meant to kill a King.” He shrugged good naturedly. “Maybe I’ll get the wrong one.”

Madyline looked ready to faint from the topic of conversation, but the shopkeep seemed to have decided that Ikari was trustworthy. “Well, if you’re bold enough to talk like that, I’d say you’ve got a damn good chance of beating the Demon King.”

“He will!” Madyline spoke, surprising the two men. “I’ve seen what he can do. His enchantments and potion making skills rival the Gods.”

The mention of any kind of deity immediately sent a wave of anger through Ikari, his memories of Ato fresh in his mind. “That so?” The shopkeep rubbed his chin thoughtfully.

“Well, if it does work, I’m sure people will line up to buy from the place that helped him. Normans Jewelers will finally be getting some foot traffic.” He stared at the small bell above his door, having only rang four times in the last week.

“Yeah well,” He picked up a ring that was laid out on the counter. “I just need a few of these to enchant and I’ll be- ok that’s new.” A new screen had appeared before him, surprising everyone in the room.

“That’s the Enchanting UI…” Ikari murmured, reaching out to it. Next to him, both Madyline and Norman looked upon the screen with wonder.

“Could I have done this all the time?” He asked aloud, before seeing a small piece of text under the ring he was holding.

“Warning.” He read out. “Enchantments performed without a proper [Enchantment Bench] will be 30% less effective.” That seemed like a fair trade for being able to enchant on the go. Especially when a third of whatever the total enchantment would be was still going to be in the Quadrillions or something.

He reached over to zip open his bag while it was on Madylines back. “Why is there a black hole in my bag?” He asked, staring into the abyss.

“It’s a bag of holding.” Madyline twisted her neck to peer over her shoulder. “I thought you knew that. You just say or think what you want, and it will come out.”

“Hmm. Potion Of High Boosted Enchantment.” There was a soft whistling sound, and the potion flew out. “Ow.” Ikari complained, the neck of the bottle having poked him in the eye.

He rubbed his eye while taking a gulp of the potion. “Bleechk.” He swallowed while cringing. “Tastes like licorice.” He cast replenish on the bottle and placed it back in his bag.

His eyes went to the list of enchantments, scrolling through them and wondering what he should enchant. He turned to Norman, looking him up and down. He nodded, and selected an enchantment.

Sparks of magic flew from his fingertips and struck the ring. He could feel the Mana being drained from him, realising that it must be costing more to do it away from the proper station. Eventually the magic disappeared, and a freshly enchanted ring fell into Ikari’s waiting hand.

“Catch.” He said, tossing the ring to Norman. He managed to grab it out of the air, and stared at it in shock. With trembling hands, he placed it next to another ring with a tiny diamond in the middle.

His posture immediately rightened, and Ikari swore a spark of green energy erupted from him. “I- I have so much energy!” He said, beginning to jog in place. “I feel like a teenager again!” Norman began to do some jumping jacks, a wide smile on his face.

“So, does this mean I can have some rings?” Ikari asked with a chuckle. He regretted the questions as suddenly several rings were thrown at him in glee, bouncing off his face and hitting his nose.

“Of course! You could take my whole shop! You, you…” Norman finally calmed down, and rubbed the diamond ring with his free hand. “You might actually be able to beat the Demon King.”

“I will beat him. Because I don’t want to be here, and I’m not an idiot.” He reached into his pocket and brought forth the three rings with 148%. “Here. A trade. So people won’t be suspicious.”

Norman nodded and held his hand out, understanding his reasons. Ikari stretched his arm out, the sleeve of his hoodie pulling back slightly as he gave the rings to the elderly shopkeep. “Oh.” He said, staring at his wrist.

“What an interesting bracelet.” He stared at the black metal crown, never having seen anything like it before.

“Oh, yeah my dad- got it for me.” He scowled, remembering he wasn’t in the same world as him anymore.

Madyline recognised the anger on Ikari’s face, and quickly stepped to the rescue. “I think it is very neat. It would definitely make for an excellent piece of enchanted gear.” She said, trying to calm him down.

Ikari let out a deep breath, and nodded. “Yeah. Probably will.” He fiddled with the bracelet for a moment, feeling his heartbeat calm as he toyed with it. He continued this for a while, before shaking his head and fixing his sleeve.

“I’m surprised you’re so interested in this and not my, you know, electric watch?” He pulled his other sleeve back showing the digital watch. Both their eyes widened in awe.

“It shows the exact time, down to the second.” Norman leaned in, grabbing a loupe and leaning in to have a look. “And the, I’m assuming date?”

“Yeah, it has different modes too.” He told him. It was a simple digital watch, not one of those high tech phones on your wrist. He pressed a button that made a small beeping noise. “Timer. Alarm. Stopwatch.” He said, clicking through the options.

“Is it powered by magic?” Madyline asked, both her hands resting on Ikari’s arm to get a look at it.

“No, electricity.” Ikari answered.

“What’s electricity?”

Ikari opened his mouth to answer, before it ran dry. “Uhhh.” He tried to reach into his mind for an explanation. “Crap. My dad would kill me for not knowing this.”

“It is a form of energy, that is made with an electric charge.” He scratched his head, desperately trying to think of an answer that wouldn’t just leave more questions.

“And it’s used to power things like, lights and heating and…” “When I get back I’m going to have dad hammer this into my head. He was an electrician! He’d know!”

Ikari eventually sighed. “It’s a form of electrical energy that I do not know how to clearly explain.”

“Oh, so, it’s like Lightning Magic?” “THAT’S A THING?!” Ikari exclaimed, eyes widening at Madylines simple explanation.

“Well, yes. Lightning Crystals are sometimes used to light rooms. Though they’re very inefficient, extremely dangerous and only usually used by those with immense wealth.” The maid explained.

“So there’s like a hundred of them in the castle?” “Yes.” Ikari sighed, rubbing the bridge between his nose.

“Anyway, thank you for the rings.” He told Norman, slipping them into the pocket of his hoodie. “Do you know if there’s a blacksmiths or anything nearby?”

“Yes, a friend of mine, Eliza, run’s one. If you leave the shop and turn right, just keep following that road. It should lead you right to it.” He gestured as he spoke.

“Right. Time to go break the armour rating.” He hefted his bag on his back and nodded to Norman. “When I kill the Demon King, I’ll see if I can’t put a good word out for your shop or something.”

“Thank you very much, Mr. Norman.” Madyline turned and bowed low, before exiting the shop after Ikari. Norman was left alone in the shop, idly twisting his new ring with a smile.

“Oh.” He suddenly said, looking to the door. “I probably should have told them Eliza doesn’t like Heroes.”