I blinked. I swear I was blinking. You could not tell me that I wasn’t blinking. I literally felt my eyes opening and closing each time that I forced them to. No, I was definitely blinking. Seriously.

I. Was. Blinking.

…So then why was it that each time my eyes were visibly open, all I could see was plain white?

It wasn’t the blinding kind of white, nor was it necessarily dull. It was just…white.

As I “awoken” moments ago, I had assumed this white was the sun beating against my eyes after a long night of drinking and reading. However, that idea was certainly farfetched, considering my night was NOT like that in any sort of capacity.

I was beaten, almost murdered, and had even witnessed a murder. Do I have any inclination of going through that again? Ha! As if.

I had just begun my path of reobtaining my boring, yet peaceful life, and I wanted to start this venture out as soon as possible. But of course, there was one glaring issue standing before me and my goals: where the hell was I?!

No…it can’t be.

Was I dead? Was this the afterlife? That would explain the endless white, but the last time I checked; I wasn’t in any fatal condition. I had simply passed out due to exhaustion. I shouldn’t be dead…I can’t be dead!

I began to hyperventilate upon having this revelation, only to immediately stop myself after having another revelation that contradicted the first.

I’m…breathing?

To test this theory, I forcefully inhaled, and gradually exhaled. Indeed, I was breathing. I was pretty sure that dead people had no need to breathe if they were…you know, dead. But that doesn’t really help me with my current situation.

I started to pace around the white space, coming up with possibilities as to how I ended up here. Some ideas include being reincarnated, getting kidnapped, or having an outer body experience. But in all reality, the most logical possibility was that I was simply dreaming.

Alright, so let’s assume then that I was dreaming. Did I usually breathe when I dreamed? If so, then was this merely a side effect of having what they called a “lucid dream?” Was I actually lucid dreaming? And is it just me, or was I really overcomplicating things?

God, my head hurts. I need to sit down and think for a moment.

As soon as those words formed in my mind, a brown, wooden stool began to materialize before my very eyes.

“Hoooly fucking shit, what the hell?!” I exclaimed, stumbling backwards.

Where did that come from!?

I had to take a moment to calm myself. As I slightly recomposed and readjusted myself towards the mysterious stool, I started to find it oddly familiar.

“Hold on a minute…isn’t that-”

“Can’t you see? It’s the same stool from Old Lady’s library.”

I yelped, startled by the mysterious voice that suddenly spoke to me.

“Who’s there?” I said, frantically looking around the white space to find this new presence.

“It’s me!”

“T-That’s not very helpful!” I exclaimed.

“Forget about that. You can hear me fine, correct?”

“Yes yes, but where exactly are you?”

“It’s…complicated.”

“What do you mean by that?” I asked, turning my head towards the white sky. Was this mysterious voice a god of some sorts?

“Well…I haven’t fully materialized yet, and it might be quite a while before I’m able to. So, for now, I’ll just be a friendly voice in your head!

My eyebrows furrowed. “Hold on…you’re inside my head? Doesn’t that mean you could read my thoughts?”

“Not exactly. I can communicate through your mind, but I can’t necessarily read it.”

“…And how do I know you’re not lying?” I asked, my skepticism beginning to kick in.

“…I guess you have to take my word for it?”

“That in itself is highly suspicious!” I immediately responded, throwing my hands up.

“Alright alright, I can see your point. I suppose your suspicions are fair.” The voice went silent for a moment, before continuing, “You are correct. A random voice such as I - suddenly appearing and speaking to you through your mind - is quite an unusual scenario. But think about it for a moment. If I were truly out to get you, then I could’ve easily done that by now. I mean, look around you. There’s no one else here. There would be no witness for whatever heinous act I may commit…if that were even my intent in the first place. Which, as you can obviously see, is not. Wouldn’t you say that alone makes me a friendly presence?”

Not really, no. After what I’ve been through, I could no longer really trust anyone so willingly. Well…maybe except Henderson, but he’s the only exception.

However, I couldn’t deny the fact that the voice’s logic was sound. And being encased in an unknown environment with no one but this voice to somehow guide me, what choice did I have?

“…Fine. I’ll take you on your word…for now,” I said, a hint of doubt in my voice.

“I’m glad we can come to an agreement. Now, you probably have some questions for me, don’t you?”

“Uh, yeah. In fact, quite a bit.”

“Weeeeellll,” the voice began teasingly. “I’m afraid I can’t answer many of them.”

My mouth dropped. “B-But you just said-”

“I simply stated that you had questions for me. I never said anything about answering them.”

“And why won’t you do that sort of thing?” I asked, growing somewhat desperate.

“Because the beauty of living is through the experience of learning and failing.”

“…What’s with that sudden spew?”

“Pay no mind to it. You’ll soon understand its meaning,” the voice casually responded.

“Then at least answer me this,” I said, becoming more impatient by the minute. “Where am I, and why did I suddenly end up in a place full of…nothing?”

“Ah!” the voice exclaimed enthusiastically. “Now that is something I can actually answer!”

I sighed as I felt a weight lift from my shoulder. “So you’re actually somewhat reasonable,” I mumbled to myself.

“Buuuuut it’ll be more fun to let you figure that out on your own.”

My head flicked towards the white sky once more. “Are you fucking kidding me?!” I shouted. “No more of your bullshit! You told me to trust you, so show me something worth my time!”

“You ever heard about manners?”

“Fuck your manners! Answer my question now!”

“Sheesh, you’re a real piece of work. No wonder Old Lady’s starting to lose hairs.” The voice then made a few rhythmic clicking noises that further annoyed me. But once it finished, in a rather earnest tone, the voice said, “Alright, just follow my instructions and things will start to fall into place. And please just trust me here,” it begged. “I’m trying to comply to your request as best as I can.”

I wanted to object, but after much consideration, I came to realize that I didn’t have many options. Despite the voice being a nuisance and causing me much irritation, it was the only lead I had in solving this mystery. With that, I decided to bite back my pride, and nod.

“So you’re actually somewhat reasonable,” I heard the voice mockingly mumble.

“Wait a minute, that’s what I said-”

“You remember that stool from earlier?” it asked, cutting me off. I pushed aside its previous remark and turned to face the stool. “Please go to it.”

Walking a few steps forward, I arrived at the stool.

“Now please take a seat.”

I turned around and placed my buttocks over the hard, wooden surface.

“Now then, go ahead and close your eyes and just let your mind run free.”

I did as I was told and shut my eyes willingly. The white was no longer present, leaving me only with total darkness.

Now that I had made it this far, what exactly was I supposed to do? When the voice said, “let your mind run free,” where was it going?

I sat there for a long while; my eyes closed but nothing coming to mind. Just blank emptiness. And it didn’t help that the stool was one of the most uncomfortable things to sit on. Like, out of all things, why this stool?

No sane person would willingly sit here if they had the option. It was terrible! Terrible yet…so undoubtably familiar. It was something that I had become all too accustomed with after many nights of drinking and reading, and to my surprise…I actually really missed it.

Of course, the back pain it gave me was always an issue, but that never stopped me from doing what I wanted. I’ve actually enjoyed every moment of it. The wondrous fascinations of books and their deeper meanings; I really learned a lot from them. I suppose it was one of the many things that helped me cope with my amnesia.

And Old Lady had a ton of books in her library. There were these two bookshelves on either side of the stool that were filled to the brim with countless narratives. There was also this very antique table that stood to the right of me, where I would always place the book that I was previously reading on it for later use. And that window in the back, where the sun would wake me every morning. God, what a thing to remember.

“Go on ahead and open your eyes,” the voice suddenly resounded, snapping me from my nostalgic trance.

As I did so, my eyes were met by something…unusual.

“You can see it now, huh?”

Indeed. To my bewilderment, I saw something very unexpected in its finest and fullest. I was no longer surrounded by a white space, but rather, a familiar scene. I was now physically inside of Old Lady’s library.

My head eagerly circled around the room, unsure of whether I was just imagining things. But from what I could gather, it was very real, and exactly how I had remembered it.

“Holy shit…” I gasped in wonder.

“It is a library, so it’ll be a shame if you were to not read something. Go on ahead and pick up a book!”

I glanced toward the antique table and saw a familiar book. History of the Guilds was plastered over its dark, leather cover. From what I recalled, I was only able to get to the first few pages before knocking out. Perhaps I’d go on ahead and turn to where I left off.

I picked up the book and flipped to the first few pages, only to find-

“…There’s no words. There’s just a bunch of smudges and smears all over the page.”

“You ever happen to remember the exact words of a book you’ve read?”

“Of course not. That’d be impossible,” I responded, still glancing upon the blurry mess.

“Exactly right. The fact you’re able to vividly remember the library, yet cannot put together the exact words of this book, can you kind of guess how this place came to be?”

“Uh…” I was completely lost by what the voice was trying to get at. Nonetheless, I tried my best at piecing together the very little clues I had.

The library easily came to be, but the words of the page cannot manifest. That was because I remembered…remembered…

Suddenly, a wild idea came to mind.

“The things in this place are created through what I’m able to remember. In other words…my memories.” I gasped. “Can it be that I’m able to create things here based off of my memory?”

“Right you are!” the voice congratulated. “This place is where all of your memories exist.”

“But…isn’t that just another way of saying that I’m dreaming?” Dreams were, after all, based on memories, experiences, and desires. They were often incoherent, but there had to be some sort of baseline to them.

“That’s…also a bit complicated.” The voice softly chuckled. “Your physical body is currently unconscious, but your spirit has ascended to a temporary plane of existence. In a way, you can say that you’re dreaming, but what’s happening now is actually happening.”

“…That is complicated…” I considered my next question carefully. “So then what’s the purpose of this place?” I asked, finally closing the book and standing from my seat. “Besides you, why am I here?”

“…Why don’t you go on ahead and open that door in front of you?”

“The door…” Ah, that’s right. I had almost forgotten that the library had a door to it. I mean, what’s a room without a door? Because I was able to remember it now, the library door immediately manifested itself before me.

Walking toward the newly formed door, I twisted the knob. As it opened, I came face to face with yet another familiar scene. Although…

“No…you’re kidding…not this place again…”

Before me was the dreadful chamber that I had escaped not too long ago. I hesitated to walk in.

“You’re going to have to go in.”

I shook my head defiantly. “No, I don’t want to.” My gripped hand trembled against the doorknob. My legs suddenly turned to lead, refusing to take another step forward.

I didn’t want to be reminded of what happened in that chamber. I had decided to leave it all behind, wanting nothing more but my peace. And it would’ve stayed that way…if not for what the voice said next.

“Are you no longer curious about your life before the amnesia?”

I felt my stomach drop. “…Please say that again…” I said, unsure if I had heard the voice correctly.

“You’ve been wondering about who you were in your previous life, correct? Considering that this plane of existence is where memories form…don’t you believe that somewhere here, in some form or another, there’s a glimpse of your past life?”

“…You’re lying…”

“I’m not. There’s actually a fragment of your past in this very chamber. And you must step in and face your past if you want to find out.”

I didn’t want to move from where I stood, but the longer I remained in place, the greater my curiosities struck at my impulses. For the longest time, I wanted to know who I was before my amnesia. What my aspirations were, my reasons of being, my familial ties. Just something. And not being able to have even a single remanence of that…it made me feel somewhat empty. I didn’t want that. I wanted to feel whole.

With newfound determination, I suppressed my fears, took a deep breath, and stepped into the chamber. The door from behind closed autonomously and disappeared without a trace.

“Alright, I’m here. Now what?” I asked.

“Recall everything that had happened.”

“I…I…” I slapped the top of my forehead. No, I can no longer hesitate. I made it this far, so I must push through.

I closed my eyes and forced myself to recall everything.

The cellar door…the staircase…the chamber…the guards…Anna…my intervention…the attack…getting beaten…killing…dying…demi-humans…bodies…the sun…peace…my desires…

As I opened my eyes, my body turned cold upon seeing the chamber becoming exactly as I had remembered it. Laying on the floor were the two guards with spikes impaled into them, and Anna standing over them. However, they were not moving.

“As you could probably tell, everything is frozen. How could this be? Well…memories are something that last forever. Time wouldn’t really matter for these sorts of things. In other words, time is nonexistent here.”

“And how does that relate to my amnesia?” I asked.

“Since memories last infinitely, the moments in which they come to the surface are somewhat determined by the scenario in which you are placed into. Regarding this chamber, didn’t something like that happen?”

My eyes widened as the answer immediately came to mind. “When I was attacked, I was able to dodge the guard’s attacks instinctively. Somehow, I just knew where they would go and reacted accordingly. Are you saying that this instinct is something acquired from my past?”

The voice took a moment to consider the question before answering, “That is something I cannot answer.”

“Why not?!”

“Because I also do not know.” The voice paused before continuing. “Although I am aware of how this plane functions, its memories and such are solely reliant on you. As I had mentioned previously, your past memories are somewhere in this place, and it is all up to you to unearth them. I am merely here to guide you through your endeavors.”

“It’s…all up to me?” Wait, I didn’t understand. Why was I so important? What was it that allowed for me to manipulate this reality? So many questions swirled in my mind, each one requiring an answer. However, as it was, it would not be easy. I would have to discover these things for myself.

But then something strange happened. As I was deep in thought, I heard something clink at the center of the chamber. Turning my head towards the noise, I saw a strange piece of metal materialize.

“I would go to that if I were you…” the voice prompted.

I was somewhat confused by this object. I never remembered there being anything metal inside of the chamber. Where did it even come from?

I made my way towards the newly formed object. As I came closer, its shape became clearer. It wasn’t a piece of metal, but rather a tool of some sorts. No, not even a tool, it was-

“A gun…”

The object that materialized was a strange looking gun. It was small but had a long, silver barrel. Two bronze gears protruded on the side of it, and finally, the most interesting feature of the weapon: its chamber. It wasn’t the standard issue single chamber, but rather, it looked as if it could carry six rounds.

“What the hell…” This gun was something that had never existed. But that made no sense. This object had to materialize from somewhere. And considering that the voice remarked that I was the only one in control of doing this…

“How interesting.” Even the voice sounded amused.

“What is this? This sort of thing shouldn’t exist…how is it here?”

The voice did mention that time didn’t exist for memories. And if I were able to tap into the memories of the past, could it be that certain memories came from…

As I was about to confirm my discoveries with the voice, the ground began to shake violently.

“Looks like you’re finally waking up.”

I fell to my knees, unable to keep my balance steady. The world around me began to crumble. The walls caved in, and the chamber ceiling was collapsing.

“What’s going on?!” I shouted over the rumbling.

“Heh, I forgot to mention,” the voice scoffed. “Although this realm doesn’t follow the rules of time, your reality does. Thus, you must still abide to those concepts.”

This can’t be…this can’t be!

“No no no! Not now, not now!” I desperately screamed. I wasn’t done yet. I wanted to find out about my past, and now possibly even more than that. This wasn’t fair. I can’t wake up just yet!

“You’ll eventually find your way back here, so don’t worry about it too much,” the voice said, as if predicting what was on my mind. “But for now, this is where we depart. I hope to see you again soon enough, Galvin.”

With those parting words, the ground collapsed beneath me.

“WAAAAIIT!” I shouted, but it was already too late.

As the world shattered around me, I began to fall. White suddenly turned to black, but that didn’t really matter, because I was still falling…falling…falling…falling…falling…