《Dungeons Are Bad Business》Volume 2 Chapter 10: Laughing Arrows Part 2 (Luna and Holly Interlude)
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As the spell grew stronger, Luna was lifted off her feet to transform. She rotated in the air, smiling at the scent of vanilla, cloves, and cinnamon as she was bathed in magical light. Her uncomfortable, guild-given mail vanished, replaced by interlocking chromatic pumpkin scales that rippled with energy. Vambraces – engraved with vines and even more pumpkins – covered her forearms, and her shoulders were protected by a pair of buckled pauldrons. Her boots were left surprisingly unchanged, though their color shifted to match the rest of her [Pumpkin Cataphract]’s armor, taking on a orange-gold hue. The final piece of armor was a helmet that looked like a carved pumpkin, and when it locked into place, a pair of wings sprouted from Luna’s shoulder blades.
When her own transformation finished, her weapons fused together. Shield and lance became a winged spear with a glowing citrine near the tip, and the [Pumpkin Cataphract] gave it a spin as she floated down to the ground surrounded by motes of gold energy.
The sky was filled with the scents of fall…and arrows. Her opponent had no manners; having shot more than a dozen projectiles at her while she was spinning in the air. Thankfully, the power surrounding her was so much that they all burned to ash before coming close to Luna, but already the magic was dissipating and its protection wouldn’t last forever.
Raising her weapon, Luna pointed it at the bandit as she met his eye.
“In the name of the – no, wait, that’s not right – Uh, you have made a grave mistake, bandit! I will put an end to your evil!”
She felt her cheeks warm a little bit once the words were out of her mouth. Okay, so she needed to work on that a little bit. She’d talk to Holly and Hanako about it later and see what they thought. So long as I get out of this alive.
Smirking, the bandit raised his bow once more and took aim. “We’ll see about that now, shall we?”
He released the string with a twang, and the arrow whistled toward her. She swatted it away with her spear, but it continued laughing and taunting her as it landed on the ground.
“Pumpkin magic? In winter? Bless your heart.”
Another cut – this time with her spear’s blade – and the arrow fell silent, only for the sky to be filled with even more. Luna dodged and deflected them all, her reflexes and awareness both enhanced by the magic coursing through her veins.
Speaking of magic, Luna knew that she was on a timer. In the corner of her eye, she could see the gauge of orange light telling her how much longer she had left before her transformation ended. Thankfully, it didn’t seem to be depleting as quickly as it had the first time she’d seen it – all that experience earned back home wasn’t going to waste – but she was still eager to end the battle as quickly as she could. There was no way of knowing how many other bandits there would be through the trees, and Luna didn’t much fancy the prospect of fighting them without the benefits of being a [Pumpkin Cataphract].
To that end, Luna launched herself toward the grinning bandit, letting out a yell as she readied her spear. The man didn’t look concerned in the slightest as he shot another pair of arrows at her. Luna cut them away as she had all the others, but this time, it wasn’t enough. When the splinters hit the ground, they didn’t stay there. Instead, a skill whose use she hadn’t heard caused them all to fly back up into the air. After a second of hovering, they all launched themselves at Luna once again.
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The [Pumpkin Cataphract] dodged most of them, but lost momentum doing so. Each time they struck her armor, a sliver of Luna’s magic disappeared. Her foe took one step back and winked at her before disappearing into thin air as she drew close.
He reappeared a second later, having somehow moved halfway across the clearing.
“You’re going to have to do better than that, love,” he said as he nocked another arrow. “Especially after that light show earlier. Come on now, pick it up a little bit!”
Burning more magic, Luna increased her speed even further. Unfortunately, she couldn’t land a blow on the bearded man no matter how she tried. He was always just a hair’s breadth away from her spear tip, and vanished into the trees as soon as she tried to follow up. It was infuriating, especially since the floating bow on the other side of the grove continued harassing her with a constant stream of laughing arrows.
Luna gnashed her teeth as the sky was darkened once again. Even with her increased strength and speed, there was no way for her to dodge or block everything. While she didn’t think these arrows would puncture her armor, the loss of magic from so many blows would be devastating. If only she’d still had her shield!
The gem on her spear flickered, and instincts Luna didn’t recognize urged her to slam the weapon’s shaft into the ground. The shape of a spell formed in her mind, and Luna poured a good chunk of her magic into it as the arrows got close.
“[Protective Patch]!”
Vines erupted from the ground, followed quickly by pumpkins that would have won the grand prize at any county fair on the continent. The arrows thudded into them instead of Luna and she breathed a sigh of relief as she released the spell. It’d taken more magic than she’d wanted to spend, but she was pretty sure she’d still come out ahead. She looked around, but the bandit was nowhere to be seen. She felt a flicker of frustration and decided to attack the unmanned bow instead.
As she zoomed across the clearing, the bandit hopped down from a nearby tree. He fired another arrow, striking Luna in the bicep, but the arrow skidded off her mail and the [Pumpkin Cataphract]’s [Ignore Injury] kicked in so she didn’t feel any pain from the impact. Raising her spear, Luna swung hard at the bow. Interestingly, her target was filled with magic that resisted the blow, and Luna’s arms shook as she tried to cut it in half. The struggle burned her magic rapidly, so Luna opened her mind to instinct once more and repositioned, taking a step to the side so that she could slice through the bowstring instead of the weapon’s upper limb. It snapped and the bow let out a shrill scream before falling to the ground.
“You won’t be so lucky, next time! Your taste in boots is terrible!”
Surprisingly, the bandit stopped moving as soon as the bow hit the ground. He flickered for a moment like a light crystal on the verge of bursting, then vanished completely. Panting, Luna was left alone in the clearing wondering what the heck she’d just fought. She kept her spear ready, expecting more arrows to fly through the trees at any moment, but none came and her magic gauge continued ticking down. Enough thinking, it was time to move along.
Bending down, the [Pumpkin Cataphract] picked up the bow and felt something stir inside, though it was faint and hard to detect.
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[Might +1]
“I’ll bring you along with me and see if anyone knows what you are once I get out of here,” Luna said to it as she floated through the trees in what she hoped was the right direction.
With her gauge little more than a third full, Luna came to what was unmistakably the bandit’s camp and looked around with disdain. Serena would have never allowed such a clutter. Tents were haphazardly scattered around and surrounded by broken boxes and bags of stolen goods. Trinkets and treasures were stacked in small piles, and rage burned bright in Luna’s chest.
“None of this belongs to you,” she hissed as more motes appeared in the air around her. Though she still felt light and powerful, there was an undeniable drag on her consciousness that promised to soon grow worse. Shaking her head, she floated deeper into the camp.
A few men and women in desperate need of a bath noticed her – even through the fog of drink, the [Pumpkin Cataphract] was a difficult sight to miss – and cried out in alarm. They scrabbled for their weapons, but Luna was faster. Moving with speed born of anger, she dropped the bow to the ground and darted between them, knocking them all unconscious with the a burst of magic delivered through the butt of her spear before they could really fight back.
Her boots scraped the ground, so Luna checked her gauge. It was nearly empty, so with a heavy heart she dispelled [Pumpkin Cataphract] and returned to normal. It was scary to know that she’d have to face down any other bandits still in the camp without the benefits of [Pumpkin Cataphract], but she didn’t want to risk falling unconscious by running out of magic either, as she had after clearing the blight brute’s den.
As it was, she still might pass out. The world looked like it was spinning. Leaning on her lance for support, Luna looked around. Luckily, she didn’t see any other bandits, which was a good sign. It felt like her limbs had been tied to lead weights as she dragged herself through the camp, so fighting would probably be pretty rough. It was far too dangerous to try and meditate, either.
“Piper bless, let the rest of them not be around,” she muttered as she made her way toward a pair of boxes rocking on the ground. One of the corners had been smashed off, and a bony arm popped out as Luna drew close. Squealing at the sudden sight of undead, Luna lifted her lance and struck the thing, snapping the bones in half and watching the skeletal hand flop on the ground. A chuckle filled the air and Luna spun toward it, chiding herself for not noticing that anyone was nearby.
It belonged to an older man with wrinkled dark skin and bright gray hair. Judging by his torn and dirty clothing, he was a prisoner. A pair of shackles looped around his wrists, and though they looked perfectly normal at first glance, Luna felt a deep and earnest revulsion toward them. She took a step back and forced herself to relax her shoulders.
“The skeletons in that box aren’t going to hurt you,” the man said. “Neither am I for that matter, for I’ve been bound and poorly fed these past few weeks. Pray, Witch, would you free me?”
Luna lifted her lance but stayed her hand. After her battle with the green cloaked bandit and bow, she was wary of believing that things were as they first appeared.
“It’s neither of those things I’m worried about. How do I know that you’re really a prisoner?”
The man held up his cuffs and gave them a rattle. “Do you think I would have put on hushcuffs if I was here of my own volition?”
Luna’s wells flared at the name, and it took the [Pumpkin Witch] several deep breaths to calm them. Her magic burned in her veins, urging her to get away from the hushcuffs, but Luna willed away the fear and took a step toward the man. As her father taught her, courage was not the lack of fear, it was the willingness to continue moving forward despite it.
She felt the echo of the step in her mind, yet another along the well-tread path.
“Will those things hurt me?” she asked as she pointed the weapon at the cuffs.
“They shouldn’t if you hit them with a mundane weapon and not your lance,” the man replied. “They sap magic pretty quickly, so grab something from the bandits you dispatched earlier and use that instead.”
Luna did as he said, picking up a mace from the ground nearby and gesturing for the man to place his hands on a stump nearby. It took several clanging blows, but she managed to break the cuffs. The prisoner yanked his arms free. Luna’s wells shuddered as the pieces of cuff hit the ground.
Neither of them spoke right away. The man looked as if a great weight had been lifted off his shoulders as he closed his eyes and smiled. A moment later, a towering figure in an indigo gown appeared behind him. It was a ghost in the shape of a woman, though her features were marred and unsightly.
“Master, I have been worried about you,” she said as she bowed low. “I do not remember the last time we were parted for so long. I regret to report that my form and my capabilities have both been damaged by your time in captivity.”
“It’s good to see you again, Duvian,” the man said as he took the ghost’s hands in his own. “I’m sorry to cause you so much trouble. Once we get to Oar’s Crest, I’ll make sure that you’re fully repaired.”
Though her thoughts fizzed around the edges, Luna perked up at the sound of her city’s name.
“Did you…did you say that you’re going to Oar’s Crest? Might I ask…might I ask why?”
The man turned to her. “Personal curiosity. I’m a [Professor] at Locksmagister University, you see, and an old student of mine recently reached out. Apparently he managed to recruit a collection of fiends – my dear, you’re swaying on your feet. Are you alright?”
She was not. Her exertions were catching up to her all at once; her magic felt thin and brittle. Her wells were shaking, and she didn’t quite have the strength to drive her lance into the ground to use as support. The point skidded away harmlessly and tapped the remnants of the hushcuffs.
[The road is long and you have far to go, but you are now a Girl-Who-Saves-The-Day Level 7! Congratulations!]
[Inspiring Presence +1]
[Guts +1]
[You can now use Motivational Speech!]
Everything went blurry, and Luna heard snippets of the man’s voice.
“It must have been – hush cuffs – terrible way to repay – Duvian catch –“
Thwump
Opening her eyes, Luna found herself looking up at Holly. The blue-haired [Snowmancer] turned her head and cupped her hands to her mouth.
“She’s awake! Bring me some cider, would you?”
Groaning, Luna sat up and found the rest of the cookies pressed into her hands. She still felt weak, but it wasn’t as bad as it’d been after the first time she’d used [Pumpkin Cataphract]. Maybe one day she wouldn’t even pass out afterwards.
“Eat the rest of these,” Holly said. Before Luna even got the chance to ask what happened, she added, “You overdid it again. Your wells are almost empty and we found you on the ground in the middle of the bandit’s camp. Let me tell you, had it not been for that ghost being willing to carry you, we would have left you there. You’re not as light as you think you are, you know.”
Luna chewed the two cookies in her mouth and raised an eyebrow. Her [Surly Sidekick] laughed.
“Alright, that’s not true. Look, I’m glad you’re okay, Luna. We were all really worried about you. When you disappeared into that tree, we didn’t know what happened and I was afraid that you wouldn’t come back.”
The [Pumpkin Witch] took a sip of cider to wash down the cookies and sighed.
“I don’t even know what happened. How’d you find me?”
“The bell was some kind of portal. As for how I found you, I just followed [In The Nick Of Time]. It’s not as good as [Right Place Right Time], but it let me sense your general direction. Artem said you’d been passed out for almost an hour by the time we reached you. Thankfully the rest of the bandits were still out cold, so we were able to tie them up without any issues. You must have done a number on them, huh?”
Luna felt her cheeks warm as she remembered the rage and fury she’d felt seeing their camp and their stolen goods.
“I was in [Pumpkin Cataphract],” she said. “Who’s Artem?”
“That’s me,” a man’s voice said. Luna looked up and saw the prisoner she’d freed bringing over another cup of cider. The indigo-clad ghost trailed right behind him, carrying the bow Luna had picked up. Twice, the man turned his head and looked warily at the bandits who’d been bound on the far side of the adventurer’s camp. “I’m afraid we weren’t properly introduced earlier,” he said. “My name is Artem Rortenferry. And you are?”
“Luna Redhenny.”
“A good name, for a witch,” Artem said with a smile as he sat down. “The pleasure is mine, Miss Redhenny. Thank you again for freeing me.”
He held up the bow and gave her a lopsided grin. “I know you’ve just woken up and it’s terribly impolite of me to ask, but would you mind answering a few questions for me about your fight with this weaponsoul?”
“Weaponsoul? Is that like an armorsoul?”
Artem looked surprised and started muttering about “differences in function, form, personality, and other critical factors”, but the ghost next to him nodded.
“You may think of them as different branches of the same tree,” she said. “It’s hard to explain to someone who doesn’t know any armorsouls, but weaponsouls tend to be more single-minded in their pursuits. Other than that and the differences in their forms, they are rather similar.”
Luna blinked. “I know an armorsoul,” she said thickly.
That shook Rortenferry out of his muttering and the man raised an eyebrow.
“What’s its name?”
“Alforde.”
He smiled.
“Well, well, well, isn’t that something? It appears that you and I share a pair of acquaintances, Miss Redhenny. Do you, by chance, know Vee Vales?”
Holly cackled.
“Not as well as she’d like to!”
Luna and Holly's Character sheets:
Luna Redhenny:
Primary Class: Pumpkin Witch (Sarah Redhenny), Level 32
Secondary Class: Tailor (Sarah Redhenny), Level 12
Tertiary Class: Girl-Who-Saves-The-Day (Citizens of Oar’s Crest), Level 7 (+2)
Might: 39 (+1)
Wit: 27
Faith: 25
Loyalty: 34
Adventurousness: 33
Guts: 35 (+1)
Hope: 22
Stealth: 8
Charisma: 25
Inspiring Presence: 7 (+1)
Leadership: 4
Holly Sacre:
Primary Class: Snowmancer(Self), Level 29
Secondary Class: Good Girl (Neve Sacre), Level 18
Tertiary Class: Surly Sidekick (Luna Redhenny), Level 7 (+2)
Might: 33
Wit: 31
Faith: 10 (+1)
Loyalty: 12
Adventurousness: 31
Guts: 44
Stealth: 19
Charisma: 10
Greed: 28
Ambition: 29
Pride: 31
Manipulativeness: 4
Reflected Glory: 6
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