Ditto lurked behind a bush, right by Route 1’s main path. Checking his left, then checking his right, he expunged a pokeball out of his body before grasping it with two tentacles.

“Looks clear…” He mused to himself, sighing in relief before pressing the button on the ball’s centre, before letting it go.

The ball fell to the grassy ground, suddenly bursting open moments later with a bright flash of red.

Goldie appeared.

Goldie screamed.

Correction…Goldie was still screaming.

And flailing.

And freaking the flip out.

Imagine, a sparkly yellow scaled, thick fish with large eyes and big lips, bellowing out in crazed distress.

“Shit! Clam it! Cool off dammit!”

Ditto tried, but try as he might he couldn’t for the love of sanity calm her down.

As he stepped close, her tail turned to him. Goldie hovered before him like some kind of cartoon scene, slapping the living shit out of Ditto with her tail, before giving him one last slap and throwing him aside.

Ditto came to a rolling stop on the lower bark of a tree, dizzy from the assault, he shook his…head? Before setting his sights upon Goldie once more.

“Is this what I get?!” Ditto then exclaimed, “I chose you and you just lose yourself the first god damn chance you get!? Don’t you want to evolve?! Don’t you want to become stronger?!” Ditto shouted in clear annoyance, a feeling that strangely fleeted away just as easily as it had come. “I thought you wanted to become a Gyarados.” He then said calmly.

To which, Goldie’s flailing faltered.

“I do!” Goldie exclaimed, now entering a normal level of flailing…Well for a Magikarp it was normal.

“Then believe in me!” Ditto said, “I won’t do you any harm, we both want the same thing.”

Goldie paused from flailing, flopping about to meet his eyes.

Both nodding…? At one another, “Finally, now we can get to the best part of this plan.” Ditto mused.

“And pray tell…what would that be?” Goldie asked.

A cold grind grew over the green slime’s expression then, “We jump the shit outta passers by.”

“…Seriously? That’s your grand plan?” Goldie asked with now wider than usual eyes.

“I mean, skipping a few details but, yeah that’s the essence of it.” Ditto answered.

“Huh, sounds simple enough, alright let’s beat the crap out of some kids!” Goldie cheered.

“To beating up kids!” Ditto also cheered.

Minutes Later

Remy groaned as she and Chris followed Jackal back into Route 1, “Alright, go get that damn Pidgey, we’ll be here wasting god damn time.”

“You don’t gotta be like that about it…” Jackal whined, heading off down the main path with pokeball in hand and Squirtle by his side.

Walking away from his companions, “Fucking good job Jackal, Remy got a rattata, Chris got a fucking pikachu…And you forgot to even catch something!” He grumbled to himself, clutching his pokeball tighter.

Stomping his way back down the path, Jackal hears rustling coming from the left bushes.

As suddenly a couple of figures burst out of the brush, a geodude and a bellsprout chasing after an agitated yellow rat.

A Pikachu.

Jackal’s hopes rushed up in that moment, “Squirtle! Get boy!” He called out to his pokemon, “Go! Bubble!”

Opening its maw wide, watery projectiles flew out of Squirtle’s mouth then, rushing into Geodude who’s attention was taken by a cornered Pikachu.

Smashing into the rock-type pokemon, Geodude was sent tumbling down the path. Seeing its opportunity, Pikachu moved to escape.

“Not so fast!” Then exclaimed a voice from the bushes, “Wrap!” It said, and the Bellsprout’s vines rushed around the Pikachu, wrapping around its body and causing it to stumble down to the ground.

“Haha! Finder’s keepers!” Jackal exclaimed, throwing his pokeball then.

Soaring through the air and towards the yellow rat, another red ball suddenly collided with it mid-flight, followed up by a blue pokeball.

A great ball landed upon Pikachu’s head, opening up and absorbing the pokemon into itself.

“You little twat of a thief!” Exclaimed a deeply annoyed voice as a martial artist walked out of the bushes. “You tried to steal my catch didn’t you!?”

“Uh, duh no, how could I know those were your pokemon?” Jackal played dumb.

Only infuriating the well-endowed girl more. “If I had my Machamp with me…” She grumbled, glancing over at her Bellsprout and Geodude then. “Fine then, you know the rules. Two trainers lock eyes.” She retrieved her Geodude before raising a pokeball towards Jackal.

“Ugh, do we have to?” Jackal grumbled with an eye roll as both Squirtle and Bellsprout got into position before their respective trainers.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2Jmty_NiaXc

“I, martial artist Scylla challenge you to a pokemon battle!” She exclaimed, and with another groan Jackal accepted.

“Sure, fine, yeah.” Before suddenly blurting out, “Squirtle go! Use Tackle!”

Squirtle suddenly launched forth, rushing forward a few steps before disappearing into its shell.

“Hah, Stun Spore!” Scylla exclaimed, as Bellsprout then shook its head in response, sending out a cloud of yellow spores.

Returning from its shell, Squirtle slammed its feet into the ground and pushed hard to the side, avoiding the cloud but losing balance and tumbling off to the side.

“Use wrap!” Scylla called out, and Bellsprout’s tentacles launched, slithering forth and surrounding Squirtle.

“Squirtle use Withdraw!” Jackal shouted and Squirtle returned to his shell just as the vines wrapped around it, visibly the shell seemed to glisten and gleam for a moment. “Now use Water Gun!” Jackal ordered, and out of each hole within the shell a burst of water shot out.

Even as several vines were pulled off, too many now lay entangled around the shell, the attack was ineffective.

“Fuck!” Jackal swore, now agitated as he realized his disadvantage.

“Too late, now fuck off, ye ken!?” The girl exclaimed, raising her pokeball towards the sky, “Bellsprout! Vine Whip!” She told her pokemon, as the remainder of its vines then whipped back before suddenly lashing forth onto the shell.

The sound filled Jackals ears, as bile began to build up in his throat, “Squirtle! Use Bubble!” He told his pokemon, but nothing happened.

At first.

As Squirtle struggled against the whippings and entanglement, pushing its hands and feet out and against the vines. Bellsprout noticed this and began to move more vines to close those holes up.

When suddenly a barrage of bubbles surged out of the upper hole, pulling away most of the vines there.

“Good one! Now bite your way out of the last two!” Jackal exclaimed, and like a snapping turtle, Squirtle’s head rushed out. Grabbing hold of the two vines with its mouth, it bit down hard, and the pain was visible on the Bellsprout’s expression as it flailed.

Releasing the Squirtle from entanglement, it stood up still holding the Bellsprout’s two vines.

“Bellsprout! Stun Spore!” Scylle called out once more, but as her pokemon produced the cloud of yellow, Squirtle’s body began to glow.

Squirtle began to shine.

“Fuck yeah! That’s my boy!” Jackal shouted out enthusiastically as Wartortle now loomed over Bellsprout with a murderous glare. “Use Tackle!” Jackal said, and Wartortle pulled on the vines, pulling Bellsprout with and through its own cloud of stun spores.

Before suddenly turning about and smashing its shell into the plant-pokemon.

Sending Bellsprout tumbling back to its trainer’s feet, paralyzed.

A very annoyed trainer, as she now moved to retrieve Bellsprout.

When, a rustle came from the bushes to their right.

Following the sound, walked out an odd sight.

It was a Bellsprout, or well, its body was of one.

Except the stem was more stone than plant fibre.

And the leaves more green crystals than…well…leaves.

Then their eyes met its face.

The face of a Geodude.

The Geosprout stumbled out further into the open, coming to a stop directly inbetween Jackal, his Squirtle and Scylla with her paralyzed Bellsprout.

Each could see a wicked grin form over the Geosprout’s expression, as its entire body began to shine.

But different from how Wartortle had before it evolved.

No…

No Scylla was accustomed to that shine.

She knew that light.

She knew that move.

All.

Too.

Well.

What she didn’t know, was that this was not what she thought it was.

Scylla expected a Self-Destruct.

But instead of an incredibly painful explosion, Geosprout did explode.

In a wide range expulsion of stun spores.

Covering twice the area of effect a normal stun spore would, the spores engulfed them all.

And one by one, they each fell to the ground, paralyzed.

Jackal was the only one able to still see the Geosprout from where he lay.

And what he saw, horrified him.

As he watched Geosprout pick up a rock in one vine, and a thick stick in another.

It glanced about, its cold gaze going over each of them, until it rested upon Scylla.

“Best knock the trainers out first.” It mused to itself, flicking the rock up into the air and catching it as it came down.

A cold shiver crawled up Jackal’s spine as he watched the strange pokemon approach Scylla, looming over her fallen form for a moment, before suddenly slamming down the thick stick onto the back of her head.

Scylla went out cold, unmoving, Jackal was unsure if she was still alive after that hit.

Then…

Then the Geosprout’s head turned.

Just its head, a full 180 degrees, and stared right into his eyes.

Jackal felt a warmth engulf his crotch before it then reached his waist and thighs.

Geosprout began approaching Jackal.

Geosprout stood over Jackal.

Jackal fainted before the stick even reached him.

Still.

Geosprout clobbered Jackal, just to be sure.