A giant bitching sloth, a spirit of a poison drinking cultivator and a weak spineless imp walk on a road.

"That sounds like the bad start to a joke".

"It certainly does, your unholy majesty."

"Finally someone with enough intelligence to agree with me."

"Didn't we all agree that you are an asshole? I’ll gladly agree to that again."

"Past me was an asshole, present me is the peak of sloth evolution."

"I am pretty sure even a sloth should be able to evolve at once more."

"Doesn't- wait, I may not be able to evolve more than once again?"

Said our knowledgeable hero in all his wisdom.

"Maybe, no one really understands how evolution works, one theory is that there is just some god out there throwing darts at a giant target and hoping for the best."

"Well, that's a stupid theory."

"Actually it’s the leading one, lord."

"Hey, I don't pay you to disagree with me!"

Suddenly with renewed fervor, the demon asked hesitatingly.

"You'll actually pay me lord?"

"Yeah, of course, I'll pay you in experience and exposure."

While the face of the ghostly cultivator turned into one of schadenfreude, our demonic friends face turned shortly into on of confusion, before seemingly having understood something.

"Thank you lord for helping me achieve the next part of my evolution, I shall forever remain indebted to you. Few would be as generous as to share experience with their unworthy underlings."

"...I think he meant another type of experie-"

"Shush, ghostly boy, no one likes you."

"I have another question your sloth-hood."

"Sure-what's your name again? For some reason I always tend to forget names."

"I am xerhdos the destroyer, first of my name, bringer of-"

"Too long. From now one your name is...Timmy the intern. Yeah. Timmy the Intern, speak up about your doubts to your great king."

Named Imp [Timmy the Intern], knowing his name, you now have more power over him.

"...But he already has a name?"

You can only name yourself if you have prem-

"Alright, I understand. Stop talking, shitty system… well, whatever, it's a great name right Timmy?"

And there the demon stood, imagining his future conversations with one of his nemesis's with an indescribable emotion seen on his face.

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On a giant throne made of skulls numbering in millions, sits a gigantic demon king, looking down in disgust at a tiny little paladin standing before him, a true ant in comparison to the demon. Yet, this paladin was devoid of fear, even having a smug expression when looking at the demon.

"You know, I found out your name in ancient texts."

Surprise and sudden anger shown on the demons face, as we all know that knowing a demons name is having power over them, meaning that the little paladin will be more able to damage this demon king then any other.

"I have conquered the world you ant."

"Your name is Timmy the Intern."

"I killed a god and feasted on his flesh."

"Yeah, but your name is Timmy the Intern."

"I WILL ASCEND TO A DEMON GOD."

"Good for you, Timmy the Intern."

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGHHGH!"

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"...It's... a great name, fitting of a king, my lord."

"See, now what is your question my favorite employee?"

"You mean your only employee right?"

"Well, I understand your command to the kill the young noble, and I thank your gracefulness for gifting me with his sword...but why do we have to carry this beast-blood with us?"

He said, dragging the body of the cat girl behind him like on would a sack of potatoes.

"First of, no problem, considering he wanted to kill you to escape the contranct where his mother was able to bear him in exchange for her soul. I mean, only a bad person would try to swindle their contractors, right?

"...Yes, they where at complete fault, I didn't do anything else but sign the contract and fulfill my part."

"..."

"Secondly, good question my man. You see, I have a one of a kind artifact in the form of this ring and now I have an unwilling companion in form of a busty cat girl. You see where I am getting at?"

Complete confusion on the faces of the ghost, the devil and the, newly awoken, cat girl to be seen.

"Come on, these two are like S-grade plot armor. All I need now is either the most edgiest weapon I can find or my parents, better yet, the dead bodies of my parents and I have achieved the holy trifecta of Plot armor."

...

Here we see our protagonist sleeping in the middle of the day, again. While he does that, our other two companions stand there akwardly while the catgirl sits there, bound in ropes, crying over the realisation that her friend was killed by the demon. Not that that hindered the sloth going to sleep. Heartless bastard.

"Hey how is it going?"

"..."

"Hey."

"..."

"Hey Timmy."

"...Call me by that name again and I'll burn you. What else do you want except to annoy me?"

"...Just wanted to say welcome to hell."

"Ha, very funny you bug. But I know hell, I was born in it, you can't imagine the reek of death in that place."

...

"I'll give him a week before he runs away."

Said he, apparently very confident in the willpower of the weak imp.

"...You are right, three days."