Hah...

I am tired.

And, it's not just because of the skull beast fight. It's because Elijah has gained yet another female supporter. Even Rish, after having a talk and a hug with Yuuzu, is starting to give him longing, maidenly glances. I knew it was only a matter of time. I even told her as such.

People think I'm dumb sometimes, and they're not far wrong, but I'm not so dense as to not realise what Kiku and Seria are up to.

Then again, what appeal do I have? All I have is... a spear... and a pretty face. Kiku can cook and be a cutie. Kaede is just... well, even I can watch her progress towards humanity and be enthralled. Seria's obscenely smart and mature. Rish is like the kindest person in universe when you pull aside her thorns. The new girl is exotic.

But I... I never thought I would mean anything to anyone. I'm the last princess. One unable to be of much political or social use; and only good for beating skeletons over the head.

Do I envy my big sisters? Well... sure...

Cadence had a bright future... she had a great mind, unlike me. Before the demon invasion, she led a scholarly group that helped advance the reliability of flying skiffs. Even after, I heard she was a great strategist. She deployed her Etranger like the rapier she favoured, a precision tool. We all thought dad would nominate her to be the next queen; she looked very much like mother, and losing her must have made dad feel like she died twice over.

Melody was a troublemaker, like me, but everyone let her off, because she was a genius with numbers. She even improved our economy and saved us from an impromptu financial downfall. And obviously, she was by far the most stunning woman in existence. Cadence had a great regality and evoked pure queenliness. But Melody just -oozed- beauty. Big chest, shining long silver hair, a perfect grin, and a twinkle in her blue in blue eyes that could sink a ship.

We didn't tell Elijah that Cadence died to demons because she lost faith in her Etranger. A letter arrived from her posthumously. He was feeding the demons our battle plans and intelligence. All so he could come in and save the day. We lost more than we gained, including Cadence's life, all to satisfy his hubris, because he felt this was some kind of game.

As for Melody... it was a poison that set her to an eternal sleep. A poison called arrogance, that believed she could be the saviour where her sister failed. She tried summoning three Etranger at once, and all with strict conditions, like loyalty and modesty. Summoning sickness is still poorly understood, but in this case, it was inevitable, even for a genius.

Etranger could save us, and they could also kill us. So why do we do it?

An Etranger must be the one to slay a Sage of Void. They are outside the rule of this world.

It truly shocked and surprised me that Elijah managed to deduce something that even the other Sages never knew.

But even though Jeraldine is the so-called specialist of summoning, as we trace back to, apparently, the goddess Saulm, people fail to realise our actual legacy is our fair and just rule.

Fathers lessons about being a fair and modest lady are truly noble.

But jeez, this fair play shit is a pain when you're a maiden trying to gain a man's attention.

Hah... I'm trying to get his attention...? Of course, I am. I'm also not dumb enough to deny my own feelings.

Well... ok... I was. Back at the manor. I was scared witless, realising properly for the first time that someone actually had lustful feelings for me.

For me!?

I put on a face of bravado, and disguised it behind an excuse. I was shocked at how adult I sounded for a moment. Maybe I'd be better in court than I realised.

D-did he really... pleasure himself to thoughts of me?

Kyaaaa!

But if that's my only advantage here... it’s a slim one.

I wish I could suddenly learn a new hobby that could be useful. I wish I played around with Melody-nee less, and focused more on my lessons.

I think that's it, isn't it? Elijah... he's just so earnest that it drives us all to try harder, to try and reach out our hands and grab more than we ever expected to have. He's... got this... expectation, I think, that we are bastions of dreams. But for some reason, we all realise this, and don't want to let him down.

So, we change ourselves. We become hope for him. It's crazy.

We are nearly at Hal-Castemour now. The gates are coming up.

Perhaps there is one thing I can be. I can still keep my dignity. I am, after all, a princess. I can puff out my flat chest and be the legal and moral shield for us all. I can be there as Elijah's summoner. And I can always, at the very least, protect him.

Even if he loves the others much more than me. I will stay regal and keep my upper lip stiff and only cry in private.

As this countries’ only remaining princess... this is the least that I can do...