《My Pick Up Artist System》36: Pigs get roasted
Advertisement
'I can't believe this is going so well!' Ben was chatting up one of the two hot girls that Antonio opened. The group of four were dancing and chatting. So far, everything was perfect.
When Antonio opened them, they warmed up to him right away. Then he signaled Ben over and it became a two on two, with strong cooperation between the cousins. There was no need to compete when both girls were so attractive!
Antonio whispered into Ben's ear. "Bro, we should bring these two to your dorm, they seem down."
Ben also thought so. These two were local NYU students with fake IDs like him. Their dorm was far away and they seemed very easy-going and into him and Antonio. Ben found it hard to believe, but he thought something might happen with these two!
Too bad for Ben, but nightlife was a fickle club-slut.
As the four were dancing together, getting ready to escalate things, a snarky female voice emerged from behind Ben and Antonio. "Becca, Jamie, why are you two dancing with these two?"
Ben turned around to find a girl he hadn't seen before. She was short, overweight, and had a rough face, but as he scanned her clothes, he saw they were all top luxury brands. He could also smell alcohol on her breath even from a distance.
"Karla!" The two girls with Ben greeted the new girl. Ben's girl walked over and exchanged kisses, before pointing to Ben. "They're nice! These are Antonio and Ben."
Ben held his hand out to greet Karla.
She looked down her nose at his hand and grimaced. Then she turned to Ben's girl and said, "Ew...I don't talk to losers, and I definitely don't touch them, okay? I can tell they're poor from looking at them…Tch. Why'd you want to meet here anyways? This place is full of bridge and tunnel trash…"
Advertisement
"The music here is good…" Ben's girl replied, now blushing.
"Ugh, it's sh*t. Let's ditch these two and go somewhere better. My friend's promoting and will bring us into VIP at Latrine!"
Ben raised an eyebrow. 'Did she say she's going to a club called Latrine?'
Sensing things were moving downhill, Antonio whispered to Ben, "Bro, this new chick is about to wipe out our set with a c*ckblockalypse…"
Ben narrowed his eyes. He wasn't one to cause trouble for people, but if they insulted him first and for no reason, he wouldn't take it lying down if he had a choice. "Don't worry. I have an idea…I'm going to preempt her with a c*ckblocker blocker..."
Ben put his hands in his pockets, looking for a particular item. When he found it, he put on a warm smile and walked around Karla while she scowled and gave him the stink-eye. Stopping near the girl he was chatting with before, Ben whispered a few words to her, then went back to Antonio.
"What happened?" Antonio asked.
Ben didn't respond. His left hand in his pocket gripped the Bad Luck Perfume he unboxed earlier…
Consumables disappear on use. The Perfume was still there, so Ben hadn't used it. 'Of course I can't use an item like this on her. I'm not sick in the head! She's only a random obstacle, a girl in a bar...My parents taught me better.'
"What did you do?" Antonio asked.
"A diplomatic approach," Ben answered.
"Oh. Was it something you said to your chick? What did you say?"
Ben didn't respond. He waited. Diplomacy takes time…
"AAAAHH!" Karla screamed as her legs flew forward from under her and she fell hard on her back! She also knocked over a tray from a passing waitress with her flailing arms, which sent several drinks pouring all over her! She rolled on the sticky, filthy bar floor, trying to find which way was up! Some people even stepped on her by accident! There were shoe prints on her clothes!
Advertisement
She looked at her heels and discovered the culprit. "Why is there a f*cking banana peel on the floor?!?
Ben spread a villainous grin from ear to ear as he asked Antonio, "Did you like my diplomatic approach?"
Of course Ben wouldn't use the Bad Luck Perfume on her, but it wasn't because he didn't dare, but because the item was too expensive! Cost-effectiveness and ruthlessness; That's how Ben did diplomacy! He learned from House of Cards!
'Like I said, I'm not that evil…to waste hard-earned points! That swamp-hog can eat a trash banana peel though! I can afford that sacrifice!'
"Oh my god! My Versace dress! It's ruined!"
Right then, the DJ put on a new track.
"When the pimp's in the crib ma Drop it like it's hot Drop it like it's hot Drop it like it's hot"
Everyone nearby cackled at Karla! Even her two friends tried to hide their chuckles! The timing of the song was too perfect!
While playing Snoop Dogg's track and waving one hand in the air, the DJ used the other hand to keep scratching back the song back. It was like he wanted to repeat the most suitable line for Karla's situation!
"When the pigs try to get at you
When the pigs try to get at you
When the pigs try to get at you."
Karla kept falling down over and over because her heel was stuck in the banana peel! By coincidence or not, the DJ timed the rhythm of the verse to each drop!
Anyone who held back laughter before could no longer stand it! The entire club exploded like a lolcano!
Only after a fierce struggle with gravity, did Karla manage to stand up. She looked around and saw everyone guffawing at her... "Shut up!" she screamed as she ran to the bathroom with the banana peel still hanging from her heel. Snickering themselves, her friends followed her.
Ben sneered as the noob rage quit…
'Super Mario Kart 2017 Champion b*tch! You f*cked with the wrong one!' Ben didn't fail to represent his title...
It was unfortunate that the two hotties left with her, but Ben didn't care, because he got something better!
[Congratulations! You've unlocked the Achievement: Creativity Fuels the Future(fine) - Use a system item in an unorthodox way to defuse an obstacle]
[Distributing reward: PUA Points + 500]
[Distributing reward: PUA Points + 500 (Event bonus)]
He exchanged a trash banana peel for 1000 points!
'Time for another Mystery Box!'
Francis Underwood would be proud.
Advertisement
- In Serial50 Chapters
Spirit King
After his sister and around ninety-nine thousand random people around the world disappeared in one day three years ago, Niko’s life had always been revolved around finding her. He was facing dead end after dead end, until one day he was summoned to another world along with ninety-nine thousand other people. Putting two and two together, he came to the conclusion that his sister was also summoned to this world three years ago. This world is filled with danger, and evolving is key to surviving. The evolved lived while those unable to adapt perished. With the hope of finding his sister as motivation, he aimed to become strong in this world of magic, monsters, demons, and gods.
8 219 - In Serial11 Chapters
Ordinary Transmigration
Tiffany was just an ordinary woman working her normal 8 to 5 job. Dying due to her own mistake, Tiffany woke up in a new world filled with dungeons and monsters. Fate is a cruel mistress and Tiffany knew this more than any one when she went from genius to cripple in a moment. Will Tiffany fall into despair or can she find her own path to power?
8 66 - In Serial6 Chapters
AVARICE:The Unknown World
A world where most of the land is yet to be discovered. Treasures from dimensional ruins scatter among the lands but these wealth are accompanied by great dangers .A world that is conquered by no one, and a world full mysteries. Join me into my journey to the unknown. Hey Author here, just don't expect anything ok?? This is my first work so it's kinda trashy, i ain't good with words so do forgive me for that as well. Welp that's about it your free to read
8 86 - In Serial6 Chapters
Party Member For Hire
When a group of graduate students studying the virtual world goes missing, party member for hire Vy "Thornheart" finds herself accompanying a rescue mission into the belly of the beast, the so-called Permadeathlands. She may have slain the great dragon of Ylmoth in casual play, but now she must brave the mortal danger of advanced mode. And Vy’s not the only for-hire in these parts—an old friend of hers also went missing along with those students. Does that mean she’ll find an old ally awaiting her out there somewhere, or a new enemy?
8 169 - In Serial10 Chapters
When it's Dark
Kiao wanted to prove herself to the Dias Brotherhood and herself that she is worthy to become the matron of the order in her new purpose for the future. Instead of helping others, she was told to travel around and clean abandoned chapels. At least she has friends with her, Second Warden Soletus'Sheldmartin and the Patriarch's daughter Briar'Gryfalcon escorting her. However, she is put to the test at her last stop and disaster strikes. Can she be the priestess that she wants to be and become or is she in over her head? Notice: This story is for a contest on here. This is where all the entries will be going: https://www.royalroad.com/fiction/50199/royal-road-community-magazine It'll be kind of sporadic in updates. A cover will be added on a later date. Maybe I'll finish it over the weekend. Placeholder Cover has been made. I'm hoping also, you don't need to read everything I've written to get this story. I'm going to try my hardest to write it in a way that you don't. There is anything you need to know, this story takes place after the events of Changes.
8 114 - In Serial17 Chapters
Mahabharat Time Travel (Under Heavy Editing)
Story of six girls who travel back in the time of mahabharat.What will happen if pandavs fell in love with them and on the other side shakuni is planning to make the girls against pandavs.read it to find out.
8 162

