《My Pick Up Artist System》60: First skill book
Advertisement
'200 + 500 + …' After seeing all those numbers, Ben put his proverbial nerd glasses on and added the points up in his head. Digits flew left and right in his mind's eye as he calculated a precise sum. 'Lost count! There's a lot!' Ok, doing the math himself wasn't the key. That's what his system was for.
4850 points! That's how many Ben saved now!
He couldn't believe he gathered so many in one night. Yet, Ben pinched his eyebrows because it created a new difficulty. 'Should I look for fetish places to scrounge for points over the next few days?' Different people might make different choices here, but it only took Ben several seconds to arrive at an answer: 'no f*cking way.'
The primary reason he went there last night was to see if the system would create an event. He never expected to earn so many achievements, nor for his trip to become an escape from Arkham… Besides, that party last night only happened once in a while. Even if he found something similar somewhere, he could only receive each achievement once, which meant he'd have to run around and soil himself with new disgusting activities every time. He could gain points that way and it might increase his chance of surviving in 4 days, but he'd rather die!
No amount of points were worth it to Ben if it meant being trapped in a tornado of penises and buttholes flying at him from every direction!
After 4 days, he'd still have to continue living. He needed to live being able to look at himself in the mirror!
Ben's will was firm. 'Sometimes in life, a man has to stand up, clench his anus, and say no! I will not take part in your jizz jamboree!'
Advertisement
His eyes glowed with the steadfastness of a single man blocking the gates from a mighty horde of charging c*cksmen...
This was resoluteness! This was heroism! He would die before allowing those brutes to pillage his innocent rear!
'Anyways, going there won't clear my death mission. There were few women there above a 7 and there's another requirement besides looks. That's why despite getting lucky last night with the milf, there was no change.' Ben's death mission was: [Novice Welcome - Seduce a woman within one month or die].
With the milf, Ben didn't seduce her. She seduced him. 'That titjob was like that time I made a new MMO character then a max level passed by and donated me some of their old but OP gear…'
'All right. Where were we? I'll open the store…huh? Why isn't there anything different?' The first thing Ben noticed was there wasn't any new item listed although he gathered so many points. From 1000 to 4850, no new item popped up.
'Maybe the stronger items scale up on a curve just like stats. I don't know if the next one will be available at 5k or 10k. Either way, I don't have time to wait and see. I can gain many treasures now.' With this many points, Ben could buy 4 Mid Level Mystery Boxes!
However, because Fariq was here, Ben needed to go somewhere else for privacy. So, he walked to the bathroom and sat on the toilet. He would perform the unboxing on his throne…
Ben only hoped he wouldn't get something large enough to burst through the walls but so far all the items were small. 'Let's go!' Ben made the first draw. A mystery box appeared in his lap and he opened it, closing his eyes to avoid the light...
Advertisement
'A…book?' Ben's palms held a light blue book.
[Squirtle Hydro Pump(Skill Book, Fine) x1]
...
'There are Pokemon in this?'
…
After some confusion, Ben's eyes lit up. 'Is this going to give me superpowers?!? I was always more of a Charmander guy but you're gotta start building your squad from somewhere...' He checked the skill description.
[Squirtle Hydro Pump(Skill, Set, Fine) - Entry-level fingering technique to make a woman squirt]
'…I should've known better than to get my expectations up. Though, I'm not too disappointed. Wait, it says Set. Is that what I think it is?'
[Set: Gotta catch 'em all - Collect Squirtle Hydro Pump(Skill), Bulbasaur Seed Bomb(Skill), and Charmander Fire Punch(Skill) to get a bonus hidden Pikachu Sweet Kiss(Skill)]
[Collection Status: 1/3]
...
'I can follow most of the sexual innuendos, but what does Fire Punch do?'
Ben scratched his head. 'There's a lot going on here. In any case, this is my first skill! And a set skill at that! I don't know if it's any good! Or why it's named after Pokemon! But I'll take it!'
[Would you like to learn Squirtle Hydro Pump(Skill Book, Fine)?]
Ben gave a mental affirmation and soon the book turned into an energy ball made up of light. It then arced down into the toilet and shot into his anus.
…
"Ow!" It even gave him an electric shock on contact…
'Isn't it supposed to go into my forehead?!? Why the anus?!?'
The system didn't provide an answer.
"You okay in there?" Fariq shouted.
"Just catastrophic constipation…Nothing to worry about!" It was another trauma added onto the long list Ben needed to share with a psychiatrist.
Advertisement
- In Serial96 Chapters
No More Respawns
Synopsis: The first time Allen died, he was forced back into a living hell where death is temporary, and power is all that matters. With evil and depravity as the rule, tragedy becomes comedy and life becomes an act. Only a deal with a shady god can get him back to his old life, but what happens if there’s nothing left to save? Maybe hell isn’t so bad if you have infinite lives… until you don’t. Needless to say, it’s all fun and games until there’s no more respawns. Foreword: This story is meant primarily as an action adventure and secondarily as a dark and nihilistic comedy. It may not be readily apparent in the beginning, but that's what I have planned (I feel the need to emphasize the dark; don’t rage at me if it gets too ‘traumatizing’ or something). I’m going to take my time with this, so it won’t immediately inundate you with doom and gloom. This is also a comedy, remember? On that note, if for some cursed reason you just can't handle either the references or the jokes, I am willing to battle in the comments. Anyway, I still put a significant amount of effort into the system, so I hope you enjoy that part. It is a little bulky, I'll admit to that, but I wanted to try something new and its more fun when there's more depth to it. Regardless, I still have a lot of fun doing math in the middle of writing a fictional story (/s). I also want to see if I can keep from messing up the pacing. Many times, I end up going too fast because I'm afraid of the story getting boring, which tends to ironically have the opposite effect. I'm still learning I suppose; we'll see how things go. Lastly, please leave reviews and comments, they really mean a lot to me and (usually) help me improve considerably. I'll be asking for feedback in the polls and I do still check the old ones from time to time. Notes: The story takes a bit of time to develop; give it time if you're here for drama, grimdark, or antihero. The system is all blue boxes and I'm not half-assing the numbers. Chapters will be between 1k and 2k words usually. I always use the oxford coma, fight me. Might drop if rating falls below 4 stars, idk. It depends on how my life is going. Cover drawn by yours truly in MS paint. (I have skill, I know)
8 183 - In Serial22 Chapters
Heavenly Domination
''Nobody knows what is true loneliness until they reach the apex, what is like to have no equal, and live without a challenge. A hundred thousand years felt like a second and can only be compared to a grain of sand in a desert of time. I’ve seen countless worlds end and countless ones be born''In the starry sky there are many universes which contain infinite galaxies, which contain countless stars and planets. In the world of cultivation there was once a person who reached the apex of existence, omnipotent and omniscient. If there was a person that truly deserved the title of God, it was him. But once reaching the apex, he got lonely and bored, and because there was nobody equal to him, nobody could kill him. So he killed himself and chose to be reincarnated millions of years after his death. He suddenly woke up inside a cave in a young body, and this is where his new journey towards heavenly domination begins once again. Follow Tianshen as he tries to rediscover his own humanity, morals and his struggle between right and wrong. A sincere thank you to everyone that gives this story a chance.
8 87 - In Serial76 Chapters
Fand
When rainbow lights flicker across the face of the moon, Fand believes it is a good omen, at least she hopes it is. But is it? All she knows is that she doesn't want her cousin to join the Council and move far away. The only one who could prevent his leaving is the Keeper. She asks the Keeper a single request, a request that has the power to up end the lives of those she loves best, but she doesn't even consider this. Will her request be granted?
8 281 - In Serial73 Chapters
Camille Lupin the Unicorn
Now I am sure you have heard of the Marauders and Remus Lupin. But have you heard of his twin sister, who is a normal witch? This is her story through Hogwarts, the first war and the second war. Camille has light brown hair and green eyes. What is her animagus form? Does she ever become a werewolf? Who is her best friend? What house is she in? Does she have a crush on one of the Marauders? Does she become a Marauder herself? Picture of Camille in her first year on cover. Hope you enjoy the story.
8 217 - In Serial71 Chapters
5SOS SICKFICS
It's 5sos sickfics. You CAN request more than once, so please request thanks.REQUESTS ARE ALWAYS OPENStarted: 3/3 2018Finished: not yetNumber 12 in #5secondsofsummer - 26th August 2018Number 12 in #Sickfics - 26th August 2018
8 98 - In Serial9 Chapters
Connected
Elijah Mikaelson x Stiles Stilinski. It's gonna have love and fluff. Smut Free. This was requested by @AylaniAllison (Hope you like it ^_^||||)
8 154

