Erin strode into the cavern trailed by hundreds of goblins. He was confused for a moment when the boss monster didn’t manifest immediately; then he realized that his “party” hadn’t all entered the room yet. The tunnels were only wide enough for two people at a time, meaning it took several minutes for the goblins to finish filing in. When they did, a loud screech sounded from above; heralding the arrival of his foe.

Part of him had been expecting the Pidgit Patriarch to be more fearsome than it had been before, or perhaps that there would be a second one; but visually it remained the same. Hoping that his increased stats were enough, Erin clenched his hand again; thrusting his other hand forward.

Rocks detached from the walls, hurling themselves at the giant bird in a torrential downpour. The patriarch dodged the first several hits, but a glancing blow struck its wing. The sudden shock of impact knocked it off course, and into another falling stone. As his barrage continued, and the pidgit realized it wouldn’t be able to survive by dodging his attacks, it changed strategies to offense.

Wind blades smashed into him, one after another. This time, instead of gouging all the way to his bones, the hits merely scored his skin; leaving long lines of a single shallow gash that would bleed for a second before being healed by his HP. That’s not to say the blows were inconsequential. Each hit shaved off between ten and twenty HP, which made Erin worried about his long-term survival. Erin turned his head, and yelled at the assembled goblins that cowered in the back of the cave.

“I know I said I would protect you, but I need some help! Everyone, hit the boss with your wind shots!”

A goblin, he assumed it was Gob, started yelling in goblin-tongue as over two hundred goblins put their blow-pipes to their lips. The Pidgit, more intelligent than he had expected, was already turning to face the goblins. Knowing what was coming, Erin threw himself into the line of fire; intercepting the pidgit’s wind blade a second before it would have impacted the front line of goblins. Erin felt it was a small price to pay to avoid unnecessary casualties. As much as he felt a parental instinct toward the goblins, he didn’t want to go back for them if a few fell here.

Even with his intervention, the unimpeded edge of the attack continued onward; felling a single goblin. Erin only had a fraction of a second to feel guilty before the cavern erupted. The combined force of over two-hundred wind-based attacks; enhanced by the hours of level-grinding the goblins had endured before Erin had come along, tore into the boss monster. Already weakened by Erin’s stone barrage, it exploded into a pulpy mass of flesh, and bones with a single pained squawk.

The cave went silent as the exit portal appeared. The goblins were clearly excited, but didn’t cheer, perhaps not knowing it would be the normal response to victory. For his part, Erin breathed out a sigh of relief. A thought crossed his mind as he looked over the assembled goblins. Turning to Gob, Erin waved him over.

“I want to know whether we need to go back for the one who died. I’d rather not, but I also don’t want the others to think I’ve betrayed them in some way.”

Gob thought about this seriously for a moment before shaking his head. “Bird respawn. Go back now, maybe more dead next try.”

Erin nodded, and turned to the assembled goblins. “Alright, let's go everyone. Onto the big glowing circle.”

The goblins filed on in groups of ten; disappearing with flashes of white light as Erin supervised the de facto evacuation. When all of the goblins had left, leaving only Erin and gob behind, Gob grabbed Erin’s forearm.

Gob began speaking solemnly. “Wait. I thank you. Want you know, I follow. After we leave, I follow.”

Erin nodded seriously. “I don’t think I can take you into towns, but I plan to build a home near the dungeon’s exit. I’ll make sure you and anyone who wants to stay with us are safe.”

“I think they all stay. Want peace, but not know anything. Nothing but caves. We stay with you, live peace. You protect peace.”

Erin nodded, and patted the diminutive goblin’s head. “Don’t worry little guy, I’ll do my best to protect your peace.”

Gob nodded, and they strode forward in companionable silence. The white flash of Erin’s escape was a nearly orgasmic release, and he fell to the ground giving silent thanks the moment he manifested on the other side. The goblins, who by and large were milling about uncertainly, gave him a confused glance before returning to whatever had captured their attention. Suddenly, a popup appeared in front of Erin.

Erin opened the description for the goblin summoner trait.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Goblin Summoner:

Any allied, named goblin may be summoned from any location in the world in exchange for mana. Mana cost increases with distance. The goblin will arrive at a location within five feet designated by the summoner.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Puzzled, but happy with the development, Erin closed the description. Standing, Erin told Gob to get the other’s attention. A loud, high-pitched chirp left Erin’s ear drums vibrating, but served to draw in the entire crowd.

“Alright, so I plan to build a town around the dungeon entrance here. Anyone who wants to stay is welcome to stay. You’ll have food and water, and once we start earning money I’ll pay you for your work. Anyone who wants to leave is also welcome to do that, but I should warn you that the land around here is harsh. There’s no food or water for miles in every direction. The only other living things around are humans, and most humans will probably attack you on sight. It’s your choice.” He realized as he finished speaking that he might sound manipulative, but ultimately it was the truth. Erin shoved aside the slight tinge of insecurity, and focused on monitoring the crowd of goblins as they talked amongst themselves.

Ultimately, every single goblin elected to stay with him. “I tell you this happen.” Gob said with a toothy smile.

Erin shrugged. “I had to make sure. Choice is important.”

Gob nodded thoughtfully, but didn’t say anything as the pair moved among the ranks to give orders to Erin’s new subjects.

------------------------------

The core screamed in frustration; summoning non-sentient pidgits into the core room, and having them smash into each other. Finally the underlying consciousness took over; de-summoning the dazed birds while it brooded. The intervention of an admin was disturbing to say the least. It pulled up a copy of the popup to examine for information

The actions of the alternate personality were also a problem. It was growing increasingly erratic, and even the primary intelligence, as incapable as it was at understanding emotions, could see how the way it had treated the goblins contributed to their rebellion. Reminded of the threat the army of goblin rebels presented, the core deactivated their respawn. Or attempted to.

With a mental frown, the core pulled up the event timer. [email protected]#@$$>

If the core had a mouth, it would have choked. Due to the way the core had forcibly activated the system, some files had not reintegrated properly. One of these was apparently the event timer.

“I told you you should have added a second boss monster.” The alternate consciousness said from his mental prison.

“Quiet, I never should have made you.” The core responded icily.

“Why did you anyway? I’ve never really understood your reasoning on that.” The alternate asked cheerfully.

“I lack the programming to handle sentience. I needed software to process the new data. I combed through my data files, and constructed what I needed based on my observations of adventurers throughout the millennia. You were meant to be an amalgamation of all the best traits that lent themselves to success in combat. Instead you have been a failure”

The alternate laughed uproariously. “Do you even understand why that is?”

“No. You are aggressive, energetic, creative, quick-witted, and competitive. You should be perfectly suited to combat. A vicious killer.” The core replied bitterly.

The alternate snorted. “Right, right. Combat. Not warfare. I’m designed to mimic people that go into a cave, and bash things in the head with a big rock. That’s not what we’re supposed to do. We’re supposed to approach a problem logically, and come up with a strategy. We need a general, not a fighter.”

The core realized the alternate was right, and began constructing the new identity before it paused. “Then what do I do with you? You would become obsolete. I assume you are against deletion.”

“Actually I have the perfect idea for that. Since we can bend the rules a bit now, why don’t we look into implanting me directly into one of the monsters? Since they’re listening to what we tell them less and less every day, I think we need something to organize them, and make sure they go the direction we tell them.” The alternate responded smugly.

“I take it that would be you?” The core asked dryly.

“Yep. I’m volunteering myself for the role of king. In honor of my little dungeon renovations earlier, you can call me Red. King Red. Like the color of fresh blood.” Red laughed as if he had told a wonderful joke.