The following day I had no idea what to expect. I’d slept god knows how long and found Ruri still on top of me when I woke up, softly snoozing with her head against my chest. During the time I was asleep she must’ve decided it was too hot and so removed her camisole as well, leaving her in a light blue and white striped bra.

Do I move or wait for her to wake up?

It didn’t help that I had another boner from the position we were in. It would be hard if not impossible for me to look at her as just my sister from now on, but that didn’t mean it was okay for me to think about fucking her every time I saw her, like I was right now.

I pushed out the thought of trying to take advantage of her unconscious form and decided I’d try to move her off of me. Though that itself was treading into dangerous waters. What if she woke up and decided she wanted to go for round two? God knows I couldn’t resist her in this state. But simply lying here and hoping she’d wake up and leave without a word wasn’t much of a solution either, partly because I doubted I could wait so long without doing something I’d regret.

Well, there was no use waiting for an opportunity that might not come. I placed one hand on her shoulder to hold her in place and rolled us over, using my other hand to keep my weight from pressing against her. Once that was done I instantly pushed myself off of her and stood up.

Oh god...

The sight of her borderline nude form below me was a nightmare for my self control. Her panties were still pushed to the side with a wet stain that covered almost all of its front, and one of her nipples had slipped out from under her bra, with the other only loosely covered by her bra through sheer luck.

Thank god no one else is here to see this.

I knew it was wrong, but I felt a certain degree of pride knowing I had done this to her. I had turned her into a bitch in heat. In reality I hadn’t really done anything, she’d done all the work and initiated the event, but knowing I’d taken a crucial part in that was a big deal for me. There was also a darker side to it, for however long it had been she was mine and no one else's.

Once again, I forced myself to banish my thoughts and went to find my room. These apartments were all identical to each other. Two bedrooms, one bathroom, and an open floor kitchen and lounge. In my opinion, the apartments were amazing especially considering they cost nothing extra, though, students which hailed from more prestigious backgrounds tended to have a different general opinion on the matter.

At least living together meant mother wouldn’t be bothering me to check up on Ruri every day. But it meant I had to deal with Ruri. Every day. I sighed, and opened the door to one of the rooms. I counted the objects in the room: one bed, one dresser, one desk, one closet and six boxes.

I only have three boxes so that must be Ruri’s.

I went to find the other room, and ended up standing in the doorway scratching my head.

Huh, another six boxes… oh c’mon…

It’s at this point I was very much regretting my decision to not label my boxes, and unfortunately, my sister in blood had done the same. I really needed to have a shower to get the smell of sweat and… Ruri… off of me, so I needed a change of clothes.

I got to work on one of the boxes. They were all taped shut, so there was little for me to do other then pick one at random and try my luck. I picked the box up and put it on the bed, so that I could attack it a little easier.

The sound of footsteps on carpet caught my attention and I looked back to find Ruri entering the room. Our eyes linked for a moment before I turned my head back to the box I’d been quietly tearing open. Good idea Ryu, tape all your boxes shut but don’t leave yourself anything to open them. I was really just trying to distract myself from Ruri, who either didn’t realise her clothes were still a mess or simply didn’t care. I could understand her logic, I’d already effectively seen her nude, so why bother? But I still hoped she wouldn’t behave in such a way. Her usual choice of attire around me had already been hard to resist.

Ruri hopped on the bed and layed in the center, too lazy I would guess to help me open the boxes. I regretted my decision to look at her again, as something stirred inside of me, and the boner which I’d ignored earlier returned. Luckily for me, I had the box to hide it behind.

When I finally tore the box open I smiled, it was one of mine, and exactly the one I’d wanted. Ruri crawled over on her knees to see what was inside, and I swallowed the saliva that had built up in my mouth as I took a step back.

She was definitely doing this on purpose. Never had she behaved in such a way.

Even though it was my stuff, that didn’t stop her from rummaging through it, ending in her simply flipping the box over and dumping my clothes on the bed.

“I really need to take you clothes shopping Onii-chan,” said Ruri.

I didn’t expect her to speak so suddenly, but decided to take the opportunity to break the awkward atmosphere.

“I guess.”

Ruri sat down on her butt, her legs together and feet to the side, leaving her chest in clear view. There was no way I could avoid looking without making it obvious, so I choose to speak up.

“You know your bra is…” I left the rest to her.

Ruri rolled her eyes and took it off, throwing it at me, which I reluctantly caught. She then laid back and pulled her panties down her legs, taking them off and throwing them at me as well.

“Put those in the wash.”

The scent of her juices had soaked through the thin fabric, which excited my hardon even more. I threw her undergarments into the corner getting them as far from me as I could.

“Are you getting hard from looking at me again?” said Ruri.

I no longer had the box to hide behind, and having a completely nude girl in front of me made it impossible for my erection to go down.

“It’s just morning wood,” I said. “It’ll go away on its own.”

“Uh-huh,” said Ruri.

Fortunately, she left it at that, for what reason I didn’t care to worry about. Her hands fished a few pieces of clothing, specifically one of my white shirts and a pair of light blue shorts, and a towel, of course. With those in hand, she left the room to take a shower I assumed.

My suspicions were confirmed the moment I heard the shower switch on, and I took a deep breath. That whole time there’d been a part of me that wanted to hold her down and fuck her senseless, and it scared me. Not just the action, but the repercussions it could have on our relationship.

Now I’d have to live with the image of her naked body imprinted in my memory, alongside all the other lewd positions she’d shown me. Hopefully, though I doubted it, this would be the last I saw of her in such a position.

Like Ruri earlier on I laid down on the bed, and stared at the ceiling. I don’t care much about my appearance when at home, so anything would do. For now, I just needed to keep myself from doing something I couldn’t live with.

You will not masturbate to your sister.

***

After Ruri finished her shower I hopped in, being extra vigilant that I lock the door behind me, and upon finishing I found Ruri seated on the couch with my shirt and shorts on. The shirt looked fine despite being a little large, and the shorts were the same.

“Have you always liked white and light blue?” I said, striking up a conversation as I walked into the kitchen. The quicker I could get back to treating Ruri like normal the better.

“What makes you think that?” said Ruri.

“Uh… well, you know,” I said.

For the something-ith time, Ruri rolled her eyes and sighed. “Why is it so hard for you to just say it? You’ve always been like this. Acting like you don’t care what people think, but always worrying what people think of you.”

“I’m just trying to be considerate.”

“Do you need me to offer to jack you off for you be honest?” said Ruri, causing the memory of yesterday to flash into my mind. “You just don’t want to look like a pervert.”

I stayed silent. She knew me like I knew her, far too well.

Our father had died when both of us were three, leaving behind only our mother to support us. She didn’t earn a lot of money, working as a sales assistant in a small clothing store, so she was always busy. With her not around Ruri and I had grown up relying on the other for the support we needed. Our relationship had been janky at best, with each of us trying to support the other through things neither of us really understood.

“See? You know you can’t lie to me,” said Ruri, taking my silence as evidence.

What had caused such a sudden change in her behaviour? Sure, she’d always been a bit of a tease around me, but I’d taken it as her being comfortable around me.

I started searching the kitchen with the hopes the dorm had stocked us something to eat, but Ruri saved me the trouble.

“There’s nothing in there.”

“I guess we’ll have to go out for breakfast,” I said.

Though she might need to change first.

I was fairly sure that Ruri wasn’t wearing anything under that shirt and shorts, and she wasn’t so daring, at least from what I knew about her, as to go out dressed so openly.

“I’m not going out like this, go get me something,” said Ruri, confirming what I’d been thinking.

The phone in our apartment rang, indicating someone was trying to call us on the intercom. I didn’t bother asking Ruri to get it and picked it up.

“Hello?”

“Am I speaking to Ryu?” said a familiar voice.

“Yes.”

“It’s Akina. Hime-sama told me to give you her contact details but I couldn’t find you yesterday. Are you ready?”

I fumbled around for a moment to see if there was anything I could use, even though I already knew there was nothing. Just one of those things people do.

“Uh, can you just send it to me? I don’t have anything to record it on at the moment.”

“I can deliver it to you if you open the door.”

“Ah, right.” I pressed the button to open the door so Akina could enter the building. I assumed she knew how to find me since she didn’t ask.

Once I’d put the phone back on its holster, Ruri spoke up.

“Who was that?”

“Akina.” Ruri stiffened up a bit when I mentioned the girls name. “She’s one of the girls you were rude to yesterday.

Ruri mumbled something that was incoherent to me.

I sighed. “What’s wrong?” I said, trying to make her the focus of the conversation for once. I’d allowed her to lead me around far too much lately, and had a few things I needed to discuss with her as well.

“You’ve been acting s-” I stopped myself before I said strangely, knowing she’d try to use it to deflect the focus back at me. “-differently ever since yesterday.”

I already had a few theories. Maybe she was just experimenting? Jealous? Whatever it was, she’d still gone too far, not that I didn’t play a part. I should’ve stopped her the moment I realised we were crossing that invisible line.

“What?” said Ruri, unconvincingly.

“Don’t act like you don’t know what I’m talking about.”

Ruri shifted around in her seat. “Whatever you’re thinking, it’s wrong.”

“What we did yesterday was wrong. That doesn’t mean it didn’t happen.”

Ruri clicked her tongue. “Tsk. It felt good, right?”

“Stop trying to change the topic everytime I ask you something. Why are you doing all this?” I was feeling agitated and had raised my voice without realising, which is exactly what Ruri wanted. It didn’t help that Akina would be here any second now, so I’d have to cut the conversation short.

“Answer me,” said Ruri, in a commanding tone.

“It doesn’t matter,” I said. “And we’ll finish this later.”

“It’s not a hard question to answer. Just say yes or no.”

Knock knock

I ignored Ruri’s statement. “Akina is here so don’t be rude.”

I started walking to the door, but as I turned my back to her Ruri spoke.

“So you don’t want to do it again?”

My body froze. She knew exactly what she was suggesting and the effect it would have. I spun around to face her.

“Stop. It.” I pronounced those words in a serious tone. “If you answer my questions I’ll answer yours, but for now can you let this go?”

There was another knock on the door.

“Fine.” Ruri left the room and I quickly walked to the door. I gave myself a few seconds to calm down before opening the door.

Once I unlocked it Akina looked up at me, probably wondering why I’d taken so long. No, actually she’d probably be more concerned with why I was living in a girls dorm. I’d need to do see if I could do something about that as well.

“Sorry, I was busy,” I said.

Akina nodded, accepting my excuse. In her hand she held a small card which she proceeded to hold out for me.

“Thanks,” I placed the card in my pocket.

“I would like to ask for Hime-sama’s sake that you don’t share this information.” The look of determination in Akina’s eyes was impossible to ignore.

“I’ll keep it to myself.” And also ignore the fact she was calling Saya Hime-sama despite her being told otherwise. I knew how hard it was to break a long time habit.

Something behind me caught Akina’s interest.

“Is that...?”

“My sister,” I answered, not even turning around.

“Oh.” Akina actually looked… surprised? I wasn’t sure, her expression was very subtle and I didn’t know her very well. “You two must be very close.”

And with that, the conversation suddenly got interesting, causing me to raise one of my eyebrows.

“Sorry. I shouldn’t say things like that.” Akina’s eyes avoided my own while she apologized.

“No, it’s fine. Just if you don’t mind me asking, what makes you think that?”

Akina took a moment to think before speaking.

“Well… I’m not sure if you will understand me when I say this, and it’s mostly just my opinion... but, I definitely wouldn’t feel comfortable wearing what she is around anyone. You must trust each other a lot.”

I looked behind me to find Ruri laying on the couch with earbuds on. My shirt was large enough that it could follow the contour of her skin, allowing one to trace the outline of her breasts. I could see what Akina was saying. Heck, I was more uncomfortable than Ruri when she dressed so openly.

I smiled to try offset the awkward atmosphere. “I see, well thanks for giving this to me. I’ll call Saya and see if we can hang out sometime.”

Again, Akina nodded her head before she left and I closed the door.

“So?” said Ruri, turning her head towards me and removing her earbuds.

Well she’s eager. Was she being serious when she asked me those questions?

“No, you can go first,” I said while taking a seat in the single seater couch. I wasn’t so dumb as to give up my bargaining power on the first move.

Ruri shot me a smile. “It felt good, really good. Masturbating doesn’t even-”

“Stop it. Why are you doing all this? Seriously.” I took a break to grab a breath of air and let what I said sink in. “Honestly, I’m worried about you.”

Ruri’s smile faded as she opted to turn her head and look at the ceiling.

“You’re such an idiot,” said Ruri, with little conviction.

Her response made me smile, genuinely.

“Can you please just be honest with me? I want to help you.” This wasn’t the first time I’d been in a position where Ruri needed my help, even if she didn’t know or was unwilling to admit it. I could tell she was thinking hard about every move.

“If I tell you, you have to answer my questions,” said Ruri, slowly.

“I will.” Agreeing to whatever she requested at this phase was necessary to get her to speak. I knew from experience that she always needed something to feel like she has control over the situation.

There was silence in the room for a couple minutes as neither of us spoke. Ruri’s mouth opened and closed several times, before she finally spoke.

“I feel like I’m losing you.” Ruri’s voice was quiet, and she spoke slowly. “Ever since we finished primary school we’ve been drifting further and further apart. Last year the only time we held an actual conversation was during christmas dinner because Mum was there.”

I scratched my forehead. “I thought you were sick of me?” I said, feeling confused. “You shout and tease me every time you see me… have you trying to get my attention?”

“At the start of it, yeah, but... it didn’t work. And then you started to avoid me, so I started doing it to make you mad. I didn’t think it was fair that I was thinking about you every day while you continued to ignore me.”

I heard Ruri sniff, and turn her head towards the couch, hiding her face.

“When we were both accepted into this city, I was so excited. You didn’t know anyone so I thought you’d come to me, but no, you immediately made friends. I ran around trying to find you y’know? So I called Mum and convinced her to get you transferred. Nothing I’d done over all those years was working, so when you walked through that door and got a hardon, I used that. But then you still avoided me, asking all these questions… saying what I’d done was wrong.”

“I don’t know what to do anymore…” Ruri started to sob. “I can’t lose you. You’re all I’ve got.” She curled up on the sofa and covered her face with a pillow.

Sitting there and listening to Ruri cry was painful, but she needed it. It also gave me time to consider what she’d told me.

She’d said it herself, she didn’t want to lose me because I was all she had, and I guess she was right. Our relationship with our Mum was more of a formality than anything else, but our reliance on eachother early on was beyond what being siblings would normally entail. And I was pushing her away, only thinking about myself and assuming without ever taking the time to confirm it that she didn’t want me around either.

A lot of this was my fault. I should’ve been able to tell, shouldn’t have made her so reliant on me early on…

I got off my ass, kneeled down beside her, and placed my hand on her back. She didn’t push me away. “I’m sorry for being such an idiot.”

Ruri turned her head so that she could see me in the edge of her vision. The whites of her gray eyes were shaded red, and teardrops left clear trails on her skin. She focused on my face, her pupils moving as she examined me. My eyes watched hers as she did so. She looked so fragile, like she’d break under the slightest bit of pressure… I closed my eyes, and turned my head to the side for a moment. I was thinking things I should not, especially so in the position she’d trusted me with.

When I looked back Ruri had turned over to face me, hugging her pillow against her body while biting the middle of her lip. Our eyes linked together, then I heard her move, and broke the link to find she’d extended an unsteady hand out at me, so I held out mine, fingers spread apart, and she wrapped her hand hand over the top, filling the spaces between my fingers with her own.

“You’re not an idiot,” said Ruri, placing my hand over her cheek. She closed her eyes and held it there, keeping it to herself. Her lips parted slightly, and she moved my hand over her skin. I could feel the heat from her breath.

“You’re not going to leave me, are you?” said Ruri, opening her eyes to look into mine. The tears had stopped, but the evidence remained.

She continued to move my hand along her skin.

“No. I never will.”

I felt her breathing quicken, and my eyes flicked to her lips as her tongue glided over them and her lips parted once again.

“Did it feel good?” said Ruri, having decided she’d done her part.

It was strange hearing her ask such a question when she looked so defenceless, especially so when I didn’t have a choice whether I gave her an answer. It scared me, both the answer itself and what she was thinking of doing with it. The grip on my hand tightened a little, and her hand stopped moving.

Just say it.

I took a deep and steady breath. “It did.” The admission felt wrong. Soo wrong. Like I was opening the gates to something I didn’t want to see.

In my turmoil Ruri searched my eyes for any trace of dishonesty. As she did, she held my hand firmer than before, dragging it along her skin. My thumb brushed over her lower lip, pulling it back, and was moistened by the fluids within her mouth. She kept my hand moving, caressing her skin. It passed her neck, but she didn’t stop. I hadn’t noticed that she’d dropped the pillow.

“And?” said Ruri, never breaking eye contact.

I could feel my own shirt now, the fabric shifting under my hand; it was too large to sit taut over her body. My arms orientation was starting to get uncomfortable as well, but that wasn’t a major concern. I could feel the curve of her skin that shaped one of her breasts.

I knew what she was doing. I’d had the thought from the start but didn’t let myself indulge in it.

“Ruri you’re not thinking straight,” I said, pulling my hand back.

She didn’t let go, nor did she pull back. I knew she could overpower me if she wanted to. Although I was bigger, she was stronger.

“So you don’t want to do it again?” said Ruri, repeating her question from earlier.

I never lied if I could avoid it. It felt like cheating to me. But Ruri had, possibly without realising it, left me no other option. It didn’t help that she worded the question in a hard to answer manner.

My musing was interrupted.

“I want you.”

There was no deceit in her eyes, she meant every word. I opened my mouth, but closed it again. She was just confusing how she felt about me.

“But not like this,” I added on.

Ruri rebutted immediately. “So you don’t want me?”

“Not like this,” I said, reusing my words.

“But you said it felt good?” Ruri’s voice was unsteady. “We both did. So why don’t you want me?”

I didn’t reply and looked away, my eyes lingering on the door. I could leave if I wanted to, but what would she think? I’d told her I wouldn’t leave her mere moments ago, and I couldn’t do that to her, not when she was so close to shattering.

She wasn’t going to let me avoid her.

She snapped my hand back, but I was quick and resisted. It was a game of tug-o-war for a second, after which it became clear I couldn’t stop her. Steadily pulling me in, she hastily wrapped my hand around one of her breasts and fondled it, moving my hand like a puppet. Her breast exerted no resistance as my fingers cupped it and clenched down as she made me squeeze hard, compressing her breast until it was firm. She looped the action, roughly fondling herself with my hand with no sign of discomfort.

“Doesn’t that feel good?” said Ruri.

She was stealing from me, robbing me of the satisfaction I knew I should’ve been feeling from touching a girls breasts for the first time. The physical aspect was there, my body reacted as expected, but that was it.

My focus returned to Ruri. I couldn’t lie; she’d know if I did. “Yes.”

Again, it felt wrong. Like I was committing some hideous offense.

“Then touch me...” Ruri’s hand on mine fell away, and she closed her eyes. She struggled to pronounce the next word, her voice weak. “...please.”

She was shivering. Her eyes opened and I looked directly into her. There were no facades or attempts to hide who she was anymore. Before me was a terrified and lonely girl who was breaking from the thought of being abandoned.

I gave her breast a light squeeze, feeling guilty right after but unable to resist the urge, before I curled my arm around her back and pulled her into a hug with both of us on our knees. I couldn’t see her face, but I could hear the hiccups and sobs as she caved in. Her whole body trembled in my arms as she was overcome by the feelings she’d repressed all these years, the pressure of it all escaping every way it could.

I don’t know how long I held her for, but in the end she ran out of energy and fell asleep in my arms. I carried her to one of the bedrooms and laid her under the blankets of the bed, closing the door softly as I left.

Once that was done I kept moving. I was thankful that this was over, at least for now, but I needed some time to myself. There was too much on my mind, and I think better when on the move.

***

The day was still young as I walked around the city, with the chilly morning air causing goosebumps to form on my skin. I needed to buy food so kept an eye out for any stores, but otherwise all my attention was on the events that had just transpired.

What the fuck is wrong with me?

Watching Ruri collapse had been saddening, but, and only just a little, it was… exhilarating. Was it because I hated her? No. We had problems with one another, and at times I did feel like I hated her, but it was never to the degree that I’d have wished her to break down.

This wasn’t the first time I’d felt something like this, so it wasn’t a one time thing.

I spotted a store called Munchy Mart and decided to head in, grabbing a few things before I started to head home - huh, it felt a little odd calling that apartment home. I didn’t think about anything specific on my way back, just focusing on random things around me.

Tomorrow was already scheduled to be a busy day, with me receiving my uniform and starting at whatever academy I was placed into, but with Ruri suddenly needing me it looked like I wasn’t going to have a lot of time to myself anymore.

I really need to have a fap.

Ruri popped into my head.

Fuck.