22 :: Secondhand Secrets

The soft glow of the lamp’s flame tickled the pages of the journal. Ryan had shifted his workstation to his bed where he could sit more comfortably. The diary sat with an array of reference materials, spread out on the duvet. He sat cross-legged as he scratched his translation into one of his school notebooks.

"Primilan 23, 3084:

My mind is still reeling as I try to put into words the events of tonight’s gala. As expected, we were seated in the back again. Such a thing can't be helped for lower nobles, like our family. That might all be changing, soon, though.

After we had eaten, and the King had given his speech, one of the servers came to our table and asked if I would be willing to step outside the meal hall for a moment. I was so nervous that my knees trembled the entire time I was walking.

The server led me to a secluded area in the garden. Waiting there, was Marcus Cogitan, the King's own advisor! It was he who had summoned me. That made me even more nervous, of course, but he assured me that I wasn't in any kind of trouble.

He asked me what my affinity was. I told him honestly that I had none. He didn't seem surprised at all. He even smiled. That was when he told me that he had encountered the same problem when he was my age. He could tell that we had the same affinity, and told me that there were affinities that the standard examination could not test for. Then, he told me that our affinity was of the mind. I drank in every word as he explained the nature of our affinity. I couldn’t help but to think that it seemed like something that exists out of the reach of man, like time, or space, or gravity.

It makes me wonder what other affinities might exist that we don't know of or acknowledge. I’ve spent my entire childhood being assured of my worthlessness by family and friends alike. The stigma of having no affinity had limited my value to society since the day I had been tested, yet today, the king’s own adviser has asked me to become his apprentice. The only condition is that I keep our true affinity a secret. Naturally, I accepted. After all this time, I feel a sense of purpose.

As I was beginning to process what he had told me, Cogitan called my parents out to the garden, as well, to settle the details of my study. They gladly accepted the invitation for Cogitan to become my mentor. It was decided that I will visit the palace on Lundan, Mercurdan, and Venerdan, after I have finished my normal school day.

I can't wait to begin my studies! My parents are only excited about the prospect of improving the family's standing, but I just can't believe I might actually be talented in magic. Tonight was a dream come true."

Ryan caught his breath. He hadn't realized there was such an affinity as mental magic. The king's advisor was even a mental mage. This changed everything. If the king's right hand man could use mental magic, there was no telling how many members of the government were under his direct control. A chill ran down Ryan's spine. If he continued to act out against this country, might he become a target? Perhaps the reason the other students had been so compliant had something to do with this. The possibility of such underhanded methods being used against his friends inflamed Ryan’s anger, as he opened the next dogeared entry.

"Quintilan 16, 3084:

Tonight, Cogitan commanded me to search the mind of the king.

In the middle of the night, I was awoken from my slumber by a messenger summoning me to the palace on the orders of Cogitan. It was the first time that I have received such summons, so I dressed quickly and left my home as fast as I could.

When I arrived at the palace, Cogitan appeared visually shaken as he explained the situation to me. Earlier this evening, King Altinius had awakened in a cold sweat. He charged straight to Cogitan’s quarters and shoved a book in his face. He was afraid out of his mind, and raving about having spoken with God. Cogitan, in an act of desperation, searched the king’s mind.

He struggled to convey what he had seen. A being claiming to be God truly had spoken with Altinius, and even left him a book of magic formulas. There were no signs of Altinius’ mind being tampered with. Cogitan was beginning to doubt even his own sanity, so he decided that a second opinion was needed. It was for this reason that I had been summoned.

Cogitan removed the ring he had given Altinius, which kept his mind hidden. As soon as the king’s aura became visible, I reached out with my own. The connection formed without any trouble. Through the king’s eyes, I watched as the being introduced itself. It held no form. I saw only light as its voice echoed around me. It claimed to be a divine creature who had always guarded this nation and its people. The being’s tone was both deep and shallow, and seemed to contain nearly infinite voices. I can still hear it echoing in my mind. It was terrifying.

The being claimed that this kingdom would be invaded by dark forces in the near future. A powerful creature of evil had already entered the city. Here, it was sowing seeds of discord and seeking to undermine the nation’s stability. Its ultimate goal is war.

The deity claimed that the demon looked just like a man, but could change shape at will, and even vanish. It could bend the fabric of time and space to travel between this realm and wherever it had come from.

Finally, the voice commanded Altinius to seek out the demon and seal it so that its evil could never corrupt this nation. It told Altinius that he would be given a tool to set him on his path. When he awoke, he had found a thick tome, full of unfamiliar formations, on his bedside table.

I was unable to find any evidence of tampering in Altinius’ mind, nor was I able to refute any of Cogitan’s analysis. Thus, we were forced to conclude that Altinius may have experienced a divine visitation. The book of formulas was the final proof. There wasn’t a single formula in the book that we could recognize. We are still investigating them to discover their exact uses, but it seems that this book is something incredibly precious. It will, surely, be a national heirloom for ages to come.

Cogitan and the King spent the rest of the night arguing over whether or not the subjects of this nation should know about the events of this night. Altinius believed that the people had a right to know that God had spoken to him and warned them of this danger. Cogitan believed that it would be better to keep the matter secret until after the demon had been found and dealt with. Eventually, he relented and I was allowed to return to my home just before dawn.

Altinius will arrange for a public announcement to take place later today to address his discussion with God. With the formulas in this book as proof, I am confident that the people will believe his words.

In the meantime, my meetings with Cogitan have been reduced to once a week, on Lundan. He will be a necessary element in finding and capturing this demon. It can't be helped that he is too busy to keep me company. Much of the magic that I am currently learning with Cogitan requires little instruction, at this point. There is still a great deal of practice that I can conduct by myself.

However, I can't help but feel that this evening marks a change in eras. Up until now, our nation has had over 100 years of peace. It has been so long since we have faced any sort of crisis. I fear telling the people about the demon will serve only to instill panic in a people unaccustomed to conflict. I hope that we will come together to face this trial with a united front. Under King Altinius' leadership, I know that this is possible. This demon will be dealt with quickly, and we will all be able to return to our everyday lives."

Ryan was a natural skeptic. He disliked anything to do with the supernatural. As he read the words on this page, he felt both confusion and disgust. He had heard previously that the king believed the formula that had brought them here had been a gift from God. There was no way, though, that he could accept it as true. There were no such things as gods or demons. If the being in this story wasn't a god, though, then what was it? This situation was odd. Although Ryan had begun the task of translating this journal reluctantly, he now found himself fully-invested, immersing himself again in the next entry.

"Octoban 10, 3084:

Today I met a strange man. It was on my way back from the palace after attempting to meet with Cogitan. I still visit him for lessons once a week, but most of the time, he is out investigating some claim or another about the demon.

The entire capital has gone insane. Every suspicious action or common dispute ends in accusation, and another demon report given to the palace. Each report must be investigated, which means that Cogitan must be dispatched several times daily to use his secret abilities to read their mind and determine whether or not they are a demon. It's ridiculous. I've offered to help out, but he's worried that I might actually encounter the demon and get attacked. I wish there was something that I could do.

I was walking back home along Pirian St., when I sensed a mind that I couldn’t read. I thought that it might be Cogitan, so I followed it to see if I could assist him in his investigation. I was surprised to find a man that I had never seen. He looked about 30 years old, and had long brown hair that almost reached his shoulders.

I figured that he must be another mental mage, but I wasn’t sure if he was friendly, so I followed him. It didn’t take long for him to notice a clumsy girl, like me, trailing behind him, and he called out to me. He asked me why I was following him. I don’t know why I told him the truth, but I don’t regret it. He seems to be a trustworthy man. I told him that I couldn’t read his mind and was wondering why.

Instead of getting mad, he threw back his head and laughed in response. He told me without hesitation that he wasn’t a mental mage, but he knew a few and one of them had given him a formula that would help him block his thoughts. He lifted up the back of his hair and knelt down to show me the formula tattooed on his skin. It was the same formula that I had seen on the king’s ring. I had never seen a formula tattooed onto skin before and I was instantly fascinated.

I asked him to tell me about the other mental mages he knew, but he said it was time for him to leave. He told me that his name was Rocale, and wrote an address on a sheet of paper with some instructions and told me to visit him anytime I wanted. The address he gave me is in the College, so I think that he might be an instructor there. I'll try visiting him tomorrow."

This entry didn’t seem particularly interesting. What did catch Ryan’s attention, was the fact that there was a way to block mental mages. This possibility soothed the storm of panic that had been surging since he had first begun reading. He needed to get his hands on whatever formula this Rocale guy was using. Ryan turned the page and was surprised to find that the very next entry was dogeared, as well.

"Octoban 11, 3084:

Today I visited Rocale at his office in the university. He is so much more interesting than I had thought. He’s not a teacher. He says that he’s more of a detective. He works for a big company that finds people when they go missing. His organization employs hundreds of mental mages. Sometimes, those mages would help peacefully resolve disputes. Other times, they would assist in stealth missions by using mental magic to cast illusions.

This frustrated me a little. Not once has Cogitan made any mention that mental mages are capable of casting illusions. I’m starting to wonder if he even knows, or if maybe he’s keeping all of the better magic to himself. I know it’s wrong to doubt him. I’m probably just frustrated that he keeps missing our meetings. Still, I want to prove to Cogitan that I can become strong without his help. I’ve learned so much in the past few months. I don’t want to allow my growth to stagnate.

I begged Rocale to introduce me to one of the mental mages he worked with, so that they could teach me how to cast illusions. He told me that it would be impossible right now, but gave me an instructional manual on how to do use illusions. If I managed to figure it out on my own, he promised that he would introduce me to some of his coworkers. He even implied that he could get me a job if I wanted it.

I know that Cogitan is grooming me to work for him, but I have to admit that Rocale’s offer is tempting. Today, he recounted the splendor of some of his travels, describing cities that float in the skies, or spread out in tunnels across the ocean floor. He even said that he’s visited a place where everything in the city is automated by contraptions made of metal!

I feel so small today. The world is so vast, and yet I have never even traveled outside the walls of the capitol. Rocale is so worldly. I wish that I could view the world from his perspective. Perhaps, then, it wouldn’t seem quite so bleak.

I’ve decided to visit Rocale frequently from now on. I will listen to his stories about his travels and practice illusion magic until I am satisfied with my growth. This is all still very new, but I have plenty of time to decide my path.”

Ryan shifted in his bed and adopted a more comfortable position. Had this entry been bookmarked on accident? Nothing much happened. Perhaps the next section would explain.

“Novemban 30, 3084:

Something terrible happened today. I skipped my meeting with Cogitan in order to visit Rocale again. I was so close to getting this illusion magic to work. My projection was only a little bit blurry. I spent the evening working on making the more intricate features look more defined. After a couple of hours, it finally looked sharp enough to pass for real.

On my way home, I sensed Cogitan’s presence. I was tired and wanted to avoid him, but I thought that perhaps I was needed. As I paused, I could feel him drawing closer, so I went to meet him. He questioned me about my recent absences in his typical haughty tone that made me feel less like a person and more like a tool I was stupid and indignant and wanted to wound his pride. I told him that I had been studying under a new teacher. I bragged about how well-traveled he was, and how impressive the organization he worked for was. I even told him that he had taught me how to use illusion magic.

I knew that Cogitan would be upset with me, but I thought that he might also be impressed. Another part of me hoped that he would just give up on me and I could go work for Rocale’s organization. He just got a strange look in his eye and left. I know that I have let him down, but I never thought he would take it this hard. I can’t help but regret my rash behavior.”

As Ryan turned the page, he heard a knock at his door. Hurriedly, he stuffed the journal and translation materials beneath his sheets. He eased open his door, just a crack, and stared down at the familiar face that had interrupted his study.

“Where the hell have you been?” Christine demanded with a pout. “What was all that about yesterday?”

Ryan’s mind lagged for a moment as he struggled to return to the events of the present. Yesterday’s argument with Adam seemed so long ago. A quick glance out the window proved that the sun had indeed begun to rise. Ryan moved to shut the door to lock Christine out, but was stopped by her foot, which was already wedged between the door and its frame.

“You are not closing this door on me,” she scowled coolly.

Her eyes imparted the sensation that, should he continue to refuse her entry, this breath would be his last. A shiver ran down Ryan’s spine. This was a tone that she only ever used when she was out for blood. He had never once felt it directed at him. It was true enough that he’d been avoiding her lately. Defeated, he let the door swing open and motioned the fuming girl inside.