It was still dark outside. I still had some time before the Church arrived. My only concern was filtering the information that has just poured into my brain. A lot wouldn’t do it justice. I’d received more than I could handle. I had a full library in my mind that I could access with a single thought, or so I hoped.

There was something about breathing exercises. There was also something about Veins and Aether and Fragments of the Primordial Souls. I decided to let it all in instead of trying to look at each in detail. I had just received the knowledge of a thousand books, at once. I was beginning to get worried then. What if I couldn’t access the information at will?

To my surprise, and great relief, I could!

Well… to some extent…

Try to think of every book you’ve read since you were a child. Can you remember each of them in detail? If yes, congratulations you’ve got a solid memory. If not, then welcome to the club!

I couldn’t even remember my own past, let alone everything that old man poured into my brain. I could recall bits and pieces though. That was a good start. I thought of Minsec, the lord Dif spoke about, and received a mountain load of data.

Many believed him to be a forsaken god who rejected the old ways and bloodshed. There were other things about this Minsec I didn’t bother checking. When you’re faced with more data than you can handle, the first reaction is ignore it. Who’s got the time to read through all of this anyway? I had other pressing matters to attend to. So I redirected my thoughts toward my injury.

‘How can I speed up my recovery?’

‘How can I speed up my recovery?’

I repeated that question at least twenty times. Solutions came to mind, some more impossible and extravagant than the others.

“Narrow it down Myles!” I urged myself.

‘I’m a novice, and I’m injured. How can I speed up my recovery?’

“Mix any variation of Aconitum with Apple Cider and mice vocal chords –”

No, no, no, I didn’t need that. Agatha would offer her left kidney and perhaps both eyes for the information I have now. But it was useless to me. I was no Alchemist or Herbologist. I needed a simpler method.

Think Stalwart, think!

‘I’ve just received a Fragment and I have to merge its energy with my own.’ I concentrated on that bit for a while, filtering all the complicated answers until I found one I could work with.

“Close your eyes and stabilize your breathing,” the instructions read.

I did as I was told.

“Breathe in from the nose, breathe out through the mouth. Make sure you take in as much air as your body allows.”

I tried that, but my injury kept me from doing so.

“Pain is inevitable, but it’s your choice to fight it, or accept it.”

Easy for you to say! Try accepting the sensation of a thousand needles piercing your back.

It took me several attempts but I finally managed to calm down and accept the pain nudging at me. The thought of Utar marching on us kept me going. I didn’t have a choice, did I? Necessity was indeed the mother of everything!

“Keep breathing until your teeth get numb. Your nose will let in cleaner air and you’d feel your lungs and belly inflating more than usual. Your Conduits will expand then, allowing for more Essence to flow through.”

How long was I supposed to do that? I didn’t know. But it was better than hunting mice vocal chords or harvest licorice fed Brangus bull balls. Dif probably gave me all this information to mess with my head, or to show off. I didn’t care either way, I had to get on my feet and fast.

I kept breathing, chasing thoughts away. It was harder to focus on the task at hand while my mind thought of the approaching doom. But I endured until I achieved complete silence.

I felt the numbness. Then the unexpected happened. I could feel some sort of energy flowing through my entire body. I felt it circling from my toes to my head and then to my toes again.

“Follow the energy stream. Find where it gets stuck.”

I kept breathing steadily and followed the energy as I did so. It clogged somewhere near my right shoulder blade. I focused on that area then realized there was a tear through which the energy exited the stream, wasted into the air. I focused on that part to get some more instructions.

“Redirect your energy through a different Conduit. Don’t let it flow through there, lest it all goes to waste. It takes more time to recover wasted energy than harvest new one.”

It took me a long while, but I managed to redirect the energy through a different Conduit. It felt as though I was looking for a faulty pipe through which water was seeping. I had to find the source and shut it from there.

“Once the Conduit is shut, you can begin repairs. Concentrate on your entire system. Picture the Conduits as if they were in front of you. You’ll soon see the power source. Direct a single stream of power through the conduit and focus on reconstructing. The results depend on the intention of the user.”

I saw two power sources. One was close to my navel. The other was connected to my spine. The first one had a red glow to it while the second was dark purple. That was the Fragment. I remembered the snowflake crystal’s color. It emitted a stronger aura but only gave little energy. It looked as though my own energy blocked it from being distributed to my Conduits.

“If you have a Fragment,” the instructions inside my brain poured in. “Draw from it, and send the energy solely through the damaged Conduit. Beware of excessive drawing before full fusion.”

That was the trickiest part. Every time I tried to do so, the energy from the Fragment seeped through the other conduits and collided with my own. They weren’t fully compatible. I learned it the hard way. I started convulsing the moment the two energies collided.

“In case of seizures, be sure to stop drawing from the Fragment immediately. Failure to do so will cause brain damage, and death.”

Oh how wonderful! That’s why Dif instructed me to go over the instructions more than once I guess…

I focused on the energy in the Fragment and tried to pull it away, keep it in its safe zone. It didn’t obey. My entire body was shaking. I felt saliva trickle down my mouth. My heartbeat quickened and I was starting to choke on my own vomit. This escalated really quickly!

I forgot about the breathing exercises. I forgot about emptying my mind of all thoughts. I only wanted one thing: for it all to stop and for me to survive this. I mustered all the energy I had to push myself to the side. Lying on my back was a bad idea now. I can take the pain that seared through my back. I had to. I wouldn’t choke to death.

I lay on my side and accepted the pain. I was out of the woods, for now. I concentrated once more on my Conduits. I couldn’t let this power struggle continue. I saw the dark purple energy colliding with the red. There was no backing down now. I had to solve the situation or die.

How many times have I scraped death so far? I lost count.

Was this one of those times? Yes, I was sure of it. I had to believe I could survive this. I didn’t want to die, not yet anyway. I was only beginning to get things under control.

I focused all my will into the red energy, my energy. I pushed the Fragment’s away. It felt like two magnets repelling each other. The resulting force from the collision expanded my Conduits and threatened to tear them apart.

“More than one torn Conduit will ultimately lead to death, if not dealt with immediately,” the instructions said.

And here I was, thinking it’ll just feel a slight tickle if I failed to contain this situation. *Sigh…*

I kept pushing the dark purple energy away. The Conduits were expanding dangerously. I was lucky to have pushed myself to the side. Otherwise I’d have choked on my own vomit. The convulsions were back, more violent. I could barely stay conscious to fight the invading foreign energy.

The more I pushed the more my Conduits expanded. The Fragment was stronger than I was. Fighting it would only mean my death, but what other choice did I have? I summoned more energy from my core and pushed harder. The power struggle was now isolated to one Conduit, near my spine: a dangerous place to be injured in.

Cracks appeared on the Conduit, I was running out of time. I pushed harder, but that only resulted in double the resistance. Everything turned red and purple before me. I couldn’t see the Conduits anymore. In fact, I’d lost all sensations. I felt the claws of darkness scraping my back. Death was knocking at my door and I was unwilling to let it in.

But for how long?

My body stopped trembling. I heard a loud, continuous buzzing sound in my ears. The power struggle seemed to have ended, and I’ve lost it. The purple energy was seeping through, pushing my own away. My Conduits expanded and swelled to an unprecedented degree. I felt surprisingly lighter.

It’s that sensation again, of being light and devoid of worries. It’s funny how in your dying moment, while you’re drawing your last breaths, clarity hits. I understood what I had to do. But the harder I tried to take action, the harder my body fought back.

It felt like being exhausted from doing physical work for an entire day, yet struggling to stay awake. Your body just forces your eyes shut.

I knew sleep would come. I also knew that I shouldn’t accept it, that it meant eternal slumber. But it somehow didn’t matter. Death felt like a maiden’s kiss at that moment. It was bliss and happiness. It was dangerous yet immensely appealing. I was smiling, welcoming my unsolicited visitor.

“Fusion requires acceptance,” information poured in again.