John walked out from Marleya’s house, the cool night breeze blowing against his face. He wiped away the tears from his eyes on the tunic’s sleeve. Crying on command had never been his strong suit, but he did well enough in a pinch. Think of a sad song, your pet that died when you were a kid, or whatever shit that makes you cry, his instructor would say.

Just now, John thought back to that quiet afternoon as he carried his mother's lifeless body. Even years later, it still brought tears to his eyes.

As he walked back through the castle and back to his room, John brought a hand up towards his chest. Underneath the tunic, the key to the Secret Realm hanged from his neck. Vasilis had already taken too much of his time, and he couldn’t forget his mother’s wishes. As soon as this was all done with, he would focus back on what was truly important.

A week later, Hagen and his troops left the castle towards Knight’s Crossing. John remained alone in his room and, as such, was unable to watch the whole procession, but he sure was able to listen to it. Athalia, and consequently Marleya, followed along, with only Alon staying behind to take care of the castle in the meantime.

He waited for a few minutes until they were far enough that he couldn’t hear them anymore. When that finally happened, he walked out into the hallway. It looked much more deserted, not only compared to the last few days, but also to how it normally was. Hagen’s vassals, who were all previously housed at the castle, had followed him along with half of the castle’s guards.

The first person John came across was a bored-looking guard standing at the top of the stairs, inspecting the back of her gauntlet. She spared him just a glance before continuing what she had been doing. The next person he saw was a servant, a tray of food on his hands as he walked up the stairs, probably to Alon.

Still, no one paid John any mind, and he went about his business without a hitch. Until he arrived at the kitchen.

“Hey,” Neina greeted him, the corner of her mouth dirty from the sweet roll she had been eating. “I was just about to go meet you for us to spar together.”

“Hey,” John greeted back, “I thought you’d want to take the day to rest given everything that’s happening.” He hadn’t seen her the whole day, so he thought that she would be doing whatever she did when not working.

“Yeah, I thought about it, but I know how much you enjoy training. Seriously, lady Athalia is right, you should learn to take it easy every once in a while.”

“That’s exactly what I had hoped to talk to you about. I’m planning to stay in my room for the rest of the day, so you can take a day off.”

“Really? Thanks. Then how about teaching me that ‘chess’ game that all the nobles enjoy so much? We can play together.”

“Maybe tomorrow. Today I’m not feeling so well.”

Neina stared at him for a few uncomfortable moments, saying nothing.

“What?”

“It kinda feels like you’re trying to get rid of me.”

John scoffed. “Nonsense.”

“Oh yeah? Then you wouldn’t if I kept you company. I’m your bodyguard after all, so I need to care for your well being.”

“There’s no need for that. I’ll just stay in my room reading a book.”

“Then I’ll grab myself a book and follow you.”

“You said it yourself that you can’t read all that well.”

“I can learn.”

For fuck’s sake, John cursed inwardly. He forgot how perceptive, and persistent, she could be sometimes. Time was passing by quickly, and he couldn’t dawdle.

John considered his next move. He needed to get away from the castle unnoticed, and so he couldn’t have Neina following along. As such, he’d have to lose her. He already had a plan on how to do it, but she’d hate him afterward.

With the castle mostly empty, the large kitchen only had a few people going around. Still, John needed a completely isolated place for what he was about to do. “Come with me,” he said, grabbing Neina by the hand and giving her no time to argue. He pushed open the pantry’s door, found it completely empty of other people, and then pulled her inside, closing the door behind themselves.

“Mind telling me what this is all about?” she asked in an annoyed tone. “Well? I’m wait—”

John closed in on her, pressing her body against the stone wall behind her.

She gulped, startled for a moment but soon composed herself again. “Dammit John, I know how much you enjoy teasing me, but this is getting old alrea—”

John’s lips pressed against hers and she stopped talking. She was tall enough that he didn’t need to lower his head too much. Her mouth tasted sweet like berries, no doubt from the sweet roll she had been eating.

She broke the kiss, face flushed and breathing in ragged breaths, but she didn’t try to push him away. “What are you doing?”

John answered by kissing her again. Her lips were wet and soft. They easily parted as his tongue pushed inside to touch hers. His hand slid over her sleeved arm, brushing against her hand and coming to a halt at her tunic’s hemline. Then it slid underneath it before going up again, brushing against her smooth skin and stopping only at the linen cloth wrapped around her chest. It made it harder, but not impossible, to feel her nipples hardening underneath it.

His other hand slid down over her pants to roughly grab her tight behind. Lust threatened to take over his mind and he found himself struggling not to rip off their clothes. With much difficulty, he finally broke the kiss. “I’m sorry.”

Neina gulped, gasped twice, and gulped again. “Why are you sorry?”

For tricking you, he wanted to say. “For teasing you for so long. I know that you feel something for me, but I wasn’t sure if I felt the same. Now I know that the answer is yes.”

Her eyes opened wide while her lips curved up. She was the one who kissed him first this time. Her tongue invaded his mouth as she drank in their kiss. Her hands explored his body while one leg coiled around his.

Again, John struggled to break the kiss. “I want you. Upstairs, my room. It’s better that we don’t get seen together like this. You go first, I’ll follow you in a few minutes.”

She looked at his eyes, then down to his lips, and back to his eyes. She nodded. It took her a moment to fix her clothes and long dark hair. When done, she opened the door. “Don’t take too long,” she said before stepping outside.

John drew in a breath as soon as she left. “Fuck,” he muttered. Now he had done it and he felt terrible for that. Neina would hate him afterward when she realizes that he wasn’t coming. He’d need to apologize and find a way of making up to her in the future somehow. As he adjusted his clothes back to normal, he noticed, shamefully, how hard he had become. “Fuck,” he muttered again.

John stepped out of the pantry and, after making sure that Neina was nowhere in sight, he walked towards the back door and stepped into the courtyard. With hurried steps, he walked towards Marleya’s house near the empty training grounds. Her door was empty and he quickly stepped inside.

Over the table, he found a full suit of the city guard’s armor as well as a sheathed longsword, both provided by his knight. The plan was for him to use it as a disguise and blend in with the rest of the guards that would be present at the war camps. He left his shortswords back at his room as they were too conspicuous for a guard. The only thing he was taking were the Key hanging from his neck and the two coins of crystalized mana as they were easy to hide.

Hurriedly, John put the armor on, barely taking the time to adjust the straps correctly. He just needed them to stay in place for now and would correct it after leaving the castle. It took a few minutes but he made it. When done, he finally stepped out.