In the autumn night, a cold wind blew at the two as they walked on the defensive wall that surrounded Bowen Village as part of their patrol.

“NO.” warned Theo Evans, and Pepper the dog reluctantly moved away from “the interesting spot”.

It was going to take a while. Dogs are supposed to use the designated areas to relieve themselves, but the urge to mark territory is quite strong, especially when an intruder is involved. A giant hawk, grown large due to magic and practically a monster in its own right, had landed and unloaded its bowels on the wall there before continuing on with its migration. The guards joked that the bird had literally “poo-pooed” their work safeguarding the village. Luckily Theo and Pepper weren’t working that shift or they’d be neck-deep in still more scatology jokes, and really, who needs that?

The wind whipped up stronger. Already below he could see the white tarp that covered one of the defensive catapults coming off and blowing down the road towards the fish pond. Again. Somebody would get chewed out for sure for failing to check the knots.

At least he wouldn’t be the one to have to drag the damn thing out.

Keeping catapults inside the village instead of on top of the walls like the trebuchets added to the risks, such as the siege weapons accidentally knocking down their own walls and of course the inability for the firing team to directly see where they are firing, but it also meant that the enemy couldn’t see how many they had or where they were, and the catapult teams could safely fire until they ran out of ammo. The guard towers and the catapult operators had worked out a system in that the towers would each provide spotter information and between them and the pennants over each tower showing wind direction and strength, the firing team could work out on the fly how much to adjust their aim.

How to use an abacus is the first thing they teach new recruits to the catapult teams.

Pepper seemed absolutely delighted with the weather.

The wind and the height combined to bring her all sorts of new smells, and the crenelated walls broke up the gusts before they came to her so she wasn’t even all that cold.

Theo, who was much taller, was freezing his butt off. It was his fault for underestimating how quickly the temperature would drop once autumn had arrived.

Guard Tower # 2 was right next to the main gates to the village, and one of the better job locations. Each guard and their dog could stay at a tower for up to an hour, but then they had to walk to the next in line. Once there, they relieved the guard and guard dog currently stationed there, who then himself or herself had to walk to the next one, and so on. Guard Towers #1 and #2 were right by the front gates, so the walk was a very short one.

It made for a relaxing shift.

Billy Evans held out a cup of steaming hot coffee, which Theo gratefully accepted while Pepper and Basil greeted each other – or rather, Basil enthusiastically greeted Pepper with much whining and wagging, and Pepper… endured it.

“So. Saune’s almost here. Got a date?” Billy poured himself another cup.

“I think so. Maybe.” Theo just held his cup next to his chest, letting the warmth spread to his body -- and incidentally keeping his tongue from being scalded.

By all rights everything should start to be rationed soon (what with winter arriving and the spring famine right behind it), but coffee was the one thing Lord Bowen always insisted there be plenty of. With his connections, every merchant in the area KNEW there was always a market for coffee beans here.

Productivity and guard alertness shot up significantly after the decision.

“‘Maybe’?” Billy cocked an eyebrow at him.

“Sherry.”

“Huh.”

“Yeah.”

“You…?” Billy made a certain movement that four out of five women would slap him for.

“…Yeah.”

“Whoa.”

“Yeah.” Theo was gentleman enough to blush about it.

“Why ‘maybe’?”

“Her father.” And Theo sighed the ‘enduring more than my fair share’ sigh.

“Against it?”

“No. Completely for it. Did handstands and everything. Wants us to marry right on Mickelmas.”

“Whoa.”

“Yeah.”

“Problem.”

“Yeah.”

“Will you?”

“Huh?”

“Marry.”

“…Dunno.”

“Mickelmas. Not much time.”

“Yeah.”

“Huh.”

The two sipped their coffee.

Multiple guard whistles suddenly piped out in the night. Multiple lights snapped on from lanterns on the ground, from bedrooms and porch lights, and searchlights from the nearest guard towers.

Almost immediately they found and focused on…

A little girl?

A dainty thing in a white one-piece dress, not much taller than five feet and impossibly slender, was running her little heart out. Even panicked as she was, there was something… charming about her. Her elegant movements, her almost-dancing like run, the way she dodged her pursuers, the way her short silver hair reflected golden in the lights… it was like a performance.

Billy and Theo couldn’t look away.

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The whistles kept following him, trying to surround him, and they knew the territory FAR better than he did.

However, he had a MAP.

It showed the layout of the village perfectly.

More importantly, it also showed him how many were chasing him, and where they were coming from.

“+1 Stamina” had flashed at him three more times, but his endurance was running out and he was massively out-numbered.

He needed a plan.

He needed OUT.

The massive front gates were obviously closed and locked for the night.

“[THIS WAY!]” Shouted a guard.

Language Comprehension (Common): + 2

He had learned the words “this” and “way”.

Damn.

THINK!

I can’t hide!

I can’t go through the front door!

I can’t just let myself get captured!

I can’t go under…

A huge white sheet marched across the field in front of him, apparently on a wind-inspired trek to the pond he was currently avoiding.

Behind it was…

I want me to know this is a really, really, REALLY bad idea…

“But I’m doing it anyways, right?” He responded to himself as he picked up speed.

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“Elf.” Billy grunted.

“What?”

“Elf.”

“Where?”

“The one they’re chasing.”

“Really?”

Billy pulled himself away from the bolted-down telescope stand to let Theo have a look.

Finding her was easy, for some reason.

Focusing took some work though.

“Pretty.”

“Yep.”

“Nice legs too.”

“Yep.”

“Good sprinter.”

“Yep.”

“Where’s she going?”

“Catapult.”

“Stupid.”

“Yep.”

“…Huh.”

“What?”

“She made it.”

“So?”

“She’s pulling the arm down.”

“Can’t.”

“She is.”

“It takes two.”

“She’s doing it.”

“Let me see.”

Theo (reluctantly) pulled away from the telescope again.

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This!

Is!

Freaking!

Hard!

To!

Do!

Normally, it takes a number of people to work a catapult. Two people working in concert to bring the arm down, one man to latch it place, two more men to load it and yet another man to do the aiming calculations and finally fire it.

He had neither the time nor manpower to care about such things.

He wanted that damn catapult arm down NOW, and it was jolly well coming down NOW.

Latch: Not Needed.

Ammo: Himself.

Direction: Forward.

Height: At Least Higher Than The Walls.

The Map showed he was out of time. He could also hear the *thud thud* of many boots running towards him. More whistles blared at him.

He was bathed in multiple lights.

Dear God or Goddess, I hope you’re watching over me or else this is going to be a REAL SHORT TRIP!

He let go of the wheel, and leapt for the catapult’s cup right as it immediately started lifting.

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“WHOA!”

Billy and Theo were treated to the sight of an elf girl helplessly cartwheeling over the wall next to them. She easily cleared the river as well.

*Thud*

Pepper and Basil ignored the scene completely.

Or rather, Pepper ignored both the scene and BASIL completely.

Shining a searchlight themselves, they quickly spotted a surprisingly not-dead elf getting up and running, RUNNING to the woods in the distance.

“…Huh.”

“Yeah.”

“Huh…”

“…Yeah.”

“I wonder why.”

“Mike.” Theo made it sound like it was blindingly obvious.

“Oh.”

“Yeah.”

“Makes sense.”

“Yeah.”

Billy sipped his now-lukewarm coffee and made a face. He put down the cup and picked up Basil’s leash.

“So.”

“Yeah?”

“Will you?”

“What, marry?”

“Yeah.”

“… Maybe.”

“Huh.”

“Yeah.”

“Paperworks’ yours.”

“What?”

“You relieved me. I’m off to Tower #1.”

“Bastard.”

“Yeah.”

And with that, Billy put Basil’s leash on him and led/dragged him outside.

Pepper yawned and decided to take a nap.

My apologies to everyone for the long wait. I'm not dropping this series. Real life got me. I was told I had to transfer about a terabyte's worth of data... using those old, OLD 1.4mb floppy disks. Then I had to transfer THAT to old 16mb thumbdrives, then to a 64gig external harddrive, then to a brand new computer. Then I had to make the old Windows 95 era software work with Windows 10. Honestly, I was so frustrated and brain-dead each day I couldn't even focus my eyes. Made driving home real fun.

Oh, and before I forget, a special one-time treat for rusticsoldier:

"another thousand words".