The first thing I see is Valery walking towards us sighing. "You've been sighing a lot lately. Anything wrong?" Pierre asks. Valery replied by shaking her head. "It's nothing." She paused for a second. "I want to ask you guys something." Pierre's eyes perk up in interest, softly begging her to ask the question. "If both your best friends aren't friends with each other what would you do?"

Ash Khim's memories started playing in my head like one teen movie, at least to me. But to her, it was a plain, painful reality.

2018, Tracy Ong, Ash Khim and Valery Jing were the best of friends. One day while studying together for the end of year exams, Ash spots something peculiar on Tracy's body, specifically her wrist. Like an anchor in the ocean, her heart sank deeper than she thought it ever could. So many words wanted to spill out yet so little came out. The young girl tried to compose herself before asking the question. Her entire body shook as if an earthquake was taking place.

"Lynn, w-what is that on your arm?"

Ash called out Tracy's baptism name. "Oh this?" Tracy lifted her wrist. "You just noticed? This was here since Tuesday."

Ash's mind experienced great turmoil.

It has? How did I not notice it? What kind of friend am I?

"I think I'll just go home today. I can't focus here." Tracy packed her bag and left the library. Though Ash was having an existential crisis in her head, she grabbed all her books, without packing them and ran after Tracy. "Tracy! Oi stop!” Ash’s hands grabbed her shoulder. “What happened? Why didn't you tell me?" Tracy remained silent and continued walking. "Tracy! Are you not going to tell me?" Ash grabbed her hand but Tracy just shook it off. "I'll wait until you're comfortable! Please tell me everything!" Ash begged as she watched Tracy walk onto her bus.

That night, I witnessed several things. Ash in a panic, messaged Tracy all these comfort messages such as "You can tell me when you are comfortable." and "Please at least answer me" but to no reply. Moreover, it was the worst cry I have ever heard Ash let out. No words, just plain weeping.

The next day, week and month, Tracy avoided any communication with Ash at all. She would talk with all her friends except her. Even when her other friends found out about her self-harm and expressed concern, she continued to talk to them, but not to Ash. Ash began to hate herself for not being able to help her closest friend when she needed help. She continued to blame herself for not looking out for her friend even after they continued talking again.

Pierre takes a while to think. “I mean if they aren’t friends now there should be a reason right?” “They were best friends before! I just want everything to go back to the way it was.” Valery said.

I wanted to answer, but it took me a second to gather my thoughts about this situation. I knew what happened before and how much it affected Ash. “I think Pierre is right. There probably was a reason why they don’t talk to each other anymore. You probably want them to talk again and get along but if something big happened, some friendships can’t be saved.” Even though Valery didn’t say anything, I could see her eyes saying, “What do you know?” and shooting lasers at me. As a dreamcatcher, I always had to be unbiased in any decision since I am a worker in heaven after all. Taking sides was never an option as we always had to remain neutral. However, when watching over Ash as her designated dreamcatcher, and seeing how much her behaviour had changed after her friendship with Tracy ended, I did not appreciate Valery’s thought process.

After watching Ash skip meals during recess, not talk to anyone for weeks and accidentally crying in class, I figured Valery would understand her sorrow the most. Yet, she wants Ash to just forget about the scars and trauma she got?

Bullshit

I said to myself in my head. I got up and left the table. “I’m gonna go to the toilet.” I said while walking back to the class blocks.

Based on what I observed in heaven, Ash would either be in the toilet or somewhere isolated.

I started my small expedition around the school, finding the most isolated area in search of my client. As I walk around the school, the irony hits me like an entire tsunami as I think about what I am doing here. A dreamcatcher should be providing their client dream-like days and yet all she has been experiencing these past four days is heartbreak, pain and sorrow. Nothing less than that.

The bell rings as these thoughts run around my head, making me dizzy. I heave a sigh and started walking back to class. As my feet meet the entrance of the classroom, I look up to spot Ash khim sitting at her table, with her head down. The noisy hallway of the classrooms filled my ears as I stare at her. “What are you doing just standing there Joo? Madam Hong is at the corner of the hallway. You should hurry up and sit down.” Valery says as she appears behind me without any sound. She sits down but not before staring at Ash for a good five seconds. My eyes switched between the both of them as if picking what food choice to eat at a restaurant. Though my mouth was sealed, my heart spoke to me.

Talk to her today. Do your job.

Would it be bad timing to say I was pumped?

-

“Remember to complete exercise 2.5 and submit it to Chloe by tomorrow. Thank you class!” “Thank you Mr Hamzah.” The tiresome voices of the students echoed around the entire school.

2.30 p.m., school has ended for all the sec five students. My client and her best friend are currently in a silent war and I am here to hopefully solve the issue. I turned in Ash’s direction and took a deep breath.

Come on Hong Joo. You are 1004 years old. You have done this at least 20 times. What’s there to be nervous for?

Before I even knew it, my brain did the work for me and I started walking toward her. “Yo uh- Khim! Come here for a sec.” I grabbed her arm and walked towards the staircase behind the classroom block. “Yo yo relax. Don’t need to pull my arm bro.” She shook my arm off. “What do you want to talk about?” She asked. “It’s about the song.” The scowl on her face relaxed. “Oh yeah… I had 10 contenders. I had… All of them aren’t amazing or so. Plus they are all in Korean or Japanese. Some even Chinese and I’m barely fluent in that…”

My heartbeat quickened as I opened my mouth. “I think we should address another problem of yours right now…”

There it was again, a pinch of heartache. Though this time, it wasn’t from her, it was from me. Not from love or pain, but from fear.

“You argued with Valery today right?” Her scowl was long gone but a sad smile appeared on her face as she averted her gaze from me. “Ah. That. What about it? Did she tell yall about it? That Jing doesn’t know how to keep her mouth shut.” Then she looked back, right into my eyes. “I mean don’t you think it’s a bit ridiculous? If I have a problem with someone, I would tell them. If I get emotionally hurt by someone I cared about for years and years, isn’t it okay to just… give up sometimes? And not only that, I broke off my friendship with her but I didn’t tell Jing to do anything! I don’t care if they remain friends or not! I just don’t want to be friends with Tracy anymore!” I gave her a second to catch her breath. “Sorry, I don’t have good memories of her.”

“It’s fine… Sometimes you just need to talk about it again to set it straight. Nothing wrong.” With hesitation, I attempted to bring up my idea again. “So for this problem, I was thinking why not settle this problem with a song first? That way you can get used to it first.” The expression on her face changed. “So now I need to think of a song about friendship?” It wasn’t even an assignment or exam yet she looked so stressed. “Must it be about friendship?” She looked at me. I could feel a bit of her heartache. “Is it that hard?” She scoffed and turned away to face me. “I just feel very riled up and nothing comes to my mind.” We both stayed silent for a second, thinking about any song choice that can help convey her emotions and also be appropriate for this situation.

Breaking the silence, I open my mouth. “Maybe instead of just sticking to a topic like friendship, let’s focus on how you feel.” She hummed. “If we are going with feelings, I know how I feel right now. Shitty. And just, just… Just angry. But it’s more of a disappointed kind of angry.” She sighed again. “Dude if you sigh anymore your lungs may just pop out.” Once I ended my sentence, I got the shock of my life.

BANG!

“I GOT IT! I KNOW WHAT SONG IS PERFECT FOR ME RIGHT NOW!” Her eyes lit up brighter than any star or sun. I could feel the excitement surge through her from her heartbeats.

-

Her fingers strummed over the strings gently. She cleared her throat slightly and opened her mouth. There, she would sing her feelings out.

When I'm away from you

I'm happier than ever

Wish I could explain it better

I wish it wasn't true

Give me a day or two

To think of something clever

To write myself a letter

To tell me what to do

Do you read my interviews?

Or do you skip my avenue?

When you said you were passing through

Was I even on your way?

‘Happier than Ever’ by Billie Eilish, what a way to interpret the song. Gentle starting and slowly developing the slight anger in her voice. “Hey Joo! What are you doing here?” I turn to see Valery right at my side. My eyes grew big as I looked back at Khim, who was unaware and singing her heart out. “Oh hi Valery! I’m listening to this busker. She has a very nice and calming voice.” Valery turned to face Khim, listening attentively.

I don't relate to you

I don't relate to you, no

'Cause I'd never treat me this shitty

You made me hate this city

And I don't talk shit about you on the internet

Never told anyone anything bad

'Cause that shit's embarrassing, you were my everything

And all that you did was make me fucking sad

“Ooo she does have a nice voice! Plus I love this song, it’s one of my favourite songs.” I just nodded to her comment and continued watching Khim.

You ruined everything good

Always said you were misunderstood

Made all my moments your own

Just fucking leave me alone

The song ended along with the guitar strums. The audience clapped while Khim adjusted her position. “Thank you for listening to my performance. Unfortunately, that will be the last song for today. Have a great night everyone!” I stared at Valery who seemed clueless that her best friend was performing right in front of her. With that, the audience started walking away, all talking about the performance. “Aren’t you going yet Joo?” My heart internally panicked as my outer body kept cool. “Nah I still have some errands to run. Just stopped by to watch the performance for a while.” Valery nodded and waved to me. “Well then, I’ll be going first! See you at school tomorrow!” She started walking away until she stopped. “Oh and… I heard you live in the same neighbourhood as Khim. If you see her please make sure she’s okay.” I smiled and answered with another nod.

Guess she regrets her words.

“Yo Joo, was that Valery? Did she see me? Did she recognise me?!” Khim panicked. “Uhhh…. I don’t think so? She looked pretty clueless but you did use your voice so she may have noticed.” Looking defeated, khim handed me a big black box. “Help me carry this back. I’ll give you 30% of what I got today since you did help me find out my next performance song.” I smiled and took the box away from her hands. We walked back towards the apartment block humming the tune of the song.

“Thanks, Joo.” She whispered.

What a way to end the night.