BANG!

I've heard those bangs in the distance before. But it's a completely different thing up close and I grasp Iselin's hand hard as I'm not prepared. In a fluid smooth motion, Robert corrected his body in a funny way while lifting his 'Boomstick' and pointed at the man. BANG!

Everyone react. Some jump and scream, some throw themselves on the ground, others crawl terrified backwards and many runs away terrified. A large white cloud is directly between them and billows towards the man, who takes a few steps back to avoid the cloud and collapses. That's when I see his blood spreads out on his chest and slowly seeps out from under his body. He lies there and grimaces a little, surprised at the pain as he sees the clear blue sky. A little blood from his mouth as he gargles, and his body just relaxes while he stares in the sky. He is dead. I can still faintly hear the bangs echo between the buildings and across the river. Everyone who is left stares at Robert and the body on the ground. Robert just stared at the body. Robert stands there with his cane lowered between his hands and just stares at the body. As he turns and starts walking towards us I see tears begin to flow down his cheeks.

I have seen men fight in duels many times before. Usually there are injuries, but they survive. I've seen people die - in duels or executed. But nothing like this. I remember how I once described to Hillevi what would happen if someone angered Robert, if he wanted them dead. Like a bolt from a clear blue sky. It's almost clear skies today, but Robert made his own thundercloud. If I only knew how I foresaw the future. This situation must be handled. Now!

I shout orders: "Hillevi! Guard the ship and follow Robert's instructions. Bodil! The wagon! We're leaving!"

Iselin reaches Robert before me and we take Robert to the wagon and he climbs on board. Tell Hillevi that the voyage will probably be postponed, but make sure the ship is finished. We may have to go to the islands. Bodil drives us out of the crowd, and people rush out of the way without her having to do anything, frightened and staring at Robert. Robert just looks at nothing in front of him, or on his Boomstick in their hands. Or us. I will never forget his eyes.

There will be legal repercussions on this, but with so many witnesses, I'm not worried about what Robert did or us, or if the man has relatives. I'm worried about Robert. For a long time he have known that he would have to show his power set an example, and Robert knew what would happen as soon as the man refused to accept an apology or fine. I saw Robert's eyes as he looked at us and understood that he had no choice. Then his gaze didn't let go of the man until he was dead. His Boomstick really live up to its name.

Robert barely says a word all the way home to the farm, but he stops crying as we leave Borgarsandr. Midgard is a different world than this, and Robert is not a Jarl or King who with habit, ease or cruelty sentences someone to death, torture or executes them himself. He doesn't like violence, and thinks its uncivilized.

Robert just goes straight into his room and lies down on his stomach in his bed, where Iselin and Ciara accompany him. They just hold each other. Alith is furious when she hears the news, but along with Bodil and Gunhild they all handle it better. They prepare for battle and guard. Waiting for what will happen. They've all seen blood and death before. Contributed to it, especially Gunhild who killed in duels and in battles.

I want to help my husband, but someone needs to manage the household and Iselin agrees that it's better for me to do so. She's too involved with Robert. I find it easier to distance myself, and at the same time I try to avoid blaming Robert for not directly behaving like the Furste he is, but not even I thought about it until it was too late, and then I didn't dare to interrupt. I can't stop blaming myself for failing to teach Robert to behave like a Furste, with all that entails, at least when we're out in public. Admit to Robert that he was right that the man had insulted Robert's masculinity and honor first, a Furst's masculinity, honor and power to his face. I'm such an idiot. A complete idiot. He trust my knowledge, and my mistake could have cost Robert his life, and our future together. The future of the world. I almost got my wonderful man killed, and then I would have deserved what ever that man would had done to me.

Ciara wants to kill that animal again, because of how hurt Robert is. When she fetch water and food, she curses the animals whole life and parents, and prays to all gods that he will be tormented forever, wherever he might be. For what that animal forced Robert to do, so that Robert's light was diminished. So her light was diminished. The look, seriousness and intensity Ciara has when she wishes she could have killed that animal, just so that Robert didn't have to do it, makes me careful. She sees it as killing an injured animal that is only dangerous to itself and others. Not to kill a man. Iselin and I must be watchful of anyone who seems to put Robert in a similar situation, because Ciara might act directly and without mercy. Ciara will not care about any consequences for her. We must make Ciara understand that Robert doesn't want her to do that. Make Robert tell her that, and make Robert understand so he doesn't accidentally say things like he wants someone to die, so that Ciara might hear it. For his word is her law, and Ciara might do anything to prevent something similar.

Ciara just wants Robert to be like before, and I walk in when she desperately tries to distract him, and I try in vain to get her to stop. I didn't know that Robert given her a small plug made in gold to make her happy. Robert barely reacts as he lies on the bed while Ciara stands crying and despairing with her butt shaking in the air with its red crystal by his face and tries to get him interested in sex. Begging him to take her, and crying because he has never ignored her before.

Finally, Robert just grabs her by the waist, pulls her down to him and hugs her. Tenderly hug her while he seems to try to sleep. None of them care that she is completely naked, or that she lies with a red crystal between her buttocks for all to see. I just pull the blanket up over them and let them lie there and hug each other. Iselin doesn't need to know, and I can stop her from going in there for a while.

Alith is worried about Robert. She knows how children and slaves from abroad can react, when they see death and violence up close for the first time. When they have to see how this world really is. But this is their world. She and the others have all grown up in this world, and they have all seen suffering, violence, killing, executions and sacrifices during their upbringing. Its their way of life. But not Robert. Its not his way of life.

She doesn't know much about Midgard or his life there, but at least she know that - because Robert told Iselin, and she overheard. They have no duels, executions or sacrifices, and she thought it was wrong that they're not allowed to defend their honor properly. To demand justice. But now she have a better understanding of what he ment that willingness to use violence doesn't prove honor or who's right. A careless word without ill intent from another language that he did not mean, shouldn't put him, the Academy and his women at risk. There wasn't any honor in what happened, just a mans greed and lust for his women and power. It fouled the whole purpose of a duel.

At least Robert believes that violence is only acceptable in order to defend yourself and protect innocent others, which is what he did. But she's still worried about her friend.

She knows how people can be the after they've been in a life and death in a battle. When that feeling of rush in your body, that makes your heart beat faster and you're alert and on edge - just leave. When for those who get it, the anxiety comes, with tremors and need to vomit. When some realise how close they've been to death, and that Valhalla or Folkvang might not be waiting for them, and for others that they havn't deserved it yet. Robert got that feeling before, because he knew. They could see when Robert understood what the situation meant. That he must kill the bastard. When the joyless, calm and controlled Robert took over. When he tried to get the man to accept his apology so that the bastard would live, because otherwise Robert would execute him. But the greedy lustful bastard didn't understand, so Robert executed him, and along with it his own innocence. Robert is now a part of this world.

And she was not there to prevent it. Not there to protect him. The one time he needed her, and she was relaxing in the sun. Oblivious and carefree. She was so angry with Bodil that she didn't just wound the bastard for offending their Lords honor, to prevent it to ever come to a duel. At least threatend him with it. It would have been the best option.

She could've at least offered to fight in their Lord's place!

But Alith knows that Robert couldn't accept it, and he wouldn't have, as it was an insult to masculinity, and for Robert to hide behind a female guard would be a higher insult and might be taken as a proof of his unmanliness even if Bodil won.

But Alith want someone to blame. Someone to hurt. She thanks Freya for making Robert finish his Boomstick in time, because he would have been died or at least been gravely wounded, and that wouldn't save Ciara or Kari. He's so useless with sword and shield.

Alith just wants the kind, happy, playful, flirtatious Robert back. She has no interest at all in becoming anything more than they already are - none of them have it. But Robert is more than just the best Sir or Lord she's ever served. He's a good friend. Maybe her best male friend ever. A friend who could have died due to this worlds cruelties, and now suffers. And she couldn't do anything. Can't do anything. She can't even comfort her friend or hold him. Can't help him through this. She can just wait and hope while she guards outside his door.

Alith steels herself and gets ready when three riders finally arrive, one of whom Gunhild identify as Councilor Efi from the King's Castle. It doesn't matter who they are, they will NOT take Robert!

Councilor Efi immediately accepts Kari's explaination that Roberts praying to Freya, and seems quite relieved and say that he won't disturb and just ask them to let Sejdmann Arnesson know his message, and that Town Criers will spread it around. King Asbjörn Aeriksson has confirmed that the witnesses are unanimous. Sejdmann Robert Arnesson did everything he could to stop an unjust First Blood duel, both by apologizing and trying to pay the fine, after an unintentional insult due to another language. But the man refused and wanted Roberts to prove his sejd and harm him from a distance, before using weapons in a duel. Sejdmann just pointed, and all of Borgarsandr heard as Thor's thunder struck the man dead on the ground, only then did blood start staining the ground.

Robert is starting to recover, but a bit of his optimism and joy for life died today. He doesn't have that zest anymore. He doesn't build anything and doesn't seem to think about problems and solutions, and he's not interested in anything. He barely eats. He mostly just sit and watch the world and us. Just single words and short phrases. Iselin and Ciara are never far from him and he is never alone. I too am staying close to Robert, and try to make the most of the moment when he wants to hug me, and we lay there on a blanket under the tree looking out over the sea and sky, as I fear he might shun me when he learns of my horrible mistake. As they all learn of my mistake. I just hope and pray that they can forgive me. Hope that I can earn his forgiveness.

Iselin and Ciara will both slept in his bed tonight, and I will use a sleepingpelt on the floor beside Alith. Since Councilor Efi left, she's been guarding his bedroom door, or staying a couple of meters beside him if he's outside. She insisted on spending the night in the corner of his bedroom. Just as a precaution. I guess she too feel like a failure, as we both sighed with relief when he accepted.