Chapter 3: Erasing the Past

“I hope you won’t get into the habit of passing out every time you see me.”

I turned my head at the sound of the voice. I was back in my room. Laying on my bed. Arno and Eli were both standing in one corner uncharacteristically quiet. Where did that voice come from? I rubbed my forehead thinking, if I keep hitting my head every time I pass out, I am never going to be able to get rid of this headache.

“How are you feeling?” said the voice.

It came from the foot of my bed. A young woman was sitting right on my bed!

I blinked as I tried to focus my eyes on her. The lack of light coming through the window made it hard to see exactly who I was talking to. Was it still nighttime?

“I’m ok,” I hazarded. “It’s nothing.”

She seemed pleased with my answer.

Good, I thought.

Honestly, I didn’t really feel like engaging with her. I wanted to get back to the debriefing, I wanted to meet the leader or at the very least get some answers to my questions.

She stood up and extended her left hand for me to shake. “I’m Hana,” she said. “Nice to meet you!”

She sounded and looked so formal. I could tell she was older than me. Maybe four or five years. She was shorter though. She had a tiny waist and a sculpted body. She had long brown messy hair tied up into a high ponytail. Her features were so fine. Porcelain skin, almond eyes but she had no smile. Her lips were tightly closed together. In fact, there was a hardness in her eyes that seemed to define her. I couldn’t tell if it was ruthlessness or ambition. But something about that look, sent shivers down my spine. Her tank top revealed extensive scarring on her arms and, I hadn’t notice at first, she was missing part of her right arm. It had been cut clean, right below the elbow. Amidst all this, there was something oddly pretty and familiar about her.

I shook her hand.

“Nice to meet you,” I responded.

Her face relaxed slightly. But still, she didn’t smile. Arno and Eli were lifeless, huddled in the corner. Following their lead, I thought it was best for me to keep quiet.

Swiftly Hana turned my face to look at my ink. The disgust could be seen on her face. “As soon as possible, I’ll get someone to cover your tattoo. You can’t go walking around the city with your cattle brand showing for everyone to see.”

Cattle brand?

Now that was a first. I chuckled. I had never heard anyone refer to our red ink as a cattle brand. She frowned again. She took serious offence to my laugh.

“What? You think this is funny? We bust our asses to save you and all you fucking do is pass out and laugh. Do you know how many people died, so we could get you out of there? Three! Three people died!”

I swallowed hard and averted my eyes.

“Anyway,” she said. “If you are feeling better, get up and go grab some dinner. I’ll see that Fiori gives you a debriefing about your situation.”

“Yes sir!” I eagerly replied without thinking.

“It’s Hana. Just Hana,” she corrected me with a stern look and then turned to leave.

“Wait! Who are you?” I found myself asking impulsively.

She stopped mid motion.

“Are you a… nurse?”

She squinted and tilted her head slightly. Her lips tightly pressing against each other.

“It’s Hana. You can call me Hana,” she said again, over enunciating.

Without giving any of us a second thought, Hana exited. With her, all the tension in the room left too.

Eli and Arno both relaxed instantly.

“Who was that?” I inquired.

“Hana is the reason we are all here,” explained Eli with a complete lack of enthusiasm.

“So… she’s the leader?” I asked hesitantly.

“Between us we refer to her as the leader, but in reality, she holds no official status over any off us. She just happens to be the person in the middle making the decisions,” Arno explained.

“But she is always so reluctant of being in charge,” added Eli.

“So, what are you then?” I asked cutting straight to the chase. “Are you like rebels fighting for social justice?”

“Well… Not exactly,” admitted Arno while scratching his head. “We are neither rebels, nor do we fight for justice. I guess you could say we seek… freedom.”

“Freedom?” I thought out loud.

“But then again,” continued Eli. “It seems to be highly subjective. Just like you, I was rescued from an orphanage six months ago. She came looking for me. And for someone else, I think. In the end, I was the only one rescued; she left everyone else behind. I still don’t know why she picked me. There doesn’t seem to be any method to her actions. She makes decisions and we obey because we have no real reason to disobey.”

“That’s one way to put it,” said a newcomer.

We all turned; a man had just entered the room. It was him that had just spoken. As stern as Hana looked, this guy was the complete opposite. He was handsome in every way. He had a great smile, beautiful white teeth. He was of average height, average weight, but he carried himself with stature and pride. His skin was nicely tan. His hair flowing to his shoulder in a mix of copper and caramel. He had deep brown raptorial eyes and a prominent square jaw, but his smile was what stood out the most. By the way Eli and Arno looked at him, I could tell, his charms worked on everyone.

“Hi, I’m Fiori. How’s your head? You pass out with grace, I’ll give you that,” he said laughingly.

Arno and Eli both joined him.

He continued: “Eli and you were both rescued by Hana. It only makes sense that you would stick with her. As for the others, including Arno and myself, I think, we just wanted to blow things up. She gave us an opportunity to do it. So, we joined her.”

I squinted. I wasn’t sure if he was joking or being serious.

“Blow what up?!?” I pried.

He went on: “People have many reasons to be angry these days. Our society is falling apart and with it, any resemblance of civility. I wouldn’t call us rebels. We are not rebelling against anyone. But we are definitively of a dissenting opinion. For that reason, I would call us freedom fighters, but the government certainly thinks of us as terrorists. Let me look at your face.”

During his speech, he had gotten closer to me and had started poking me in the face where my red ink was. “It’s going to hurt. I’m sorry. We have limited resources, so I can only do my best. Take a deep breath and…”

“ARGGGGGGGGGGGGGG!”

I had to try so hard to not pass out… again. The pain was bad enough for it, but my pride just couldn’t take another loss of consciousness. It took him what felt like an eternity.

When he was done, I was left with a swollen cheek and a throbbing headache. You couldn’t see the red ink anymore but the whole area was discolored and gross looking. He assured me that eventually, it would all fade away. And in a couple years, no one would even be able to tell I had ever been inked. And if I was lucky, by then, I’d have grown up to be as handsome as him.

“There! Masterpiece! You’ll be the best-looking kid around in no time.”

He had said these last words with a blatant smile, as he packed away his tools.

We all watched him exit the room. And just like that he was gone. Leaving a sense of awe in his path.

Arno suggested we should go have dinner, but my cheek was in so much pain I complained, scared I wouldn’t be able to chew any food.

With no compassion at all, Eli nudged me on the head.

“Hey! It hurts! Why did you do that?”

“Oh c’mon. It’s too early for you to be getting soft!” she said giggling. “You have a swollen cheek and you say you can’t eat? You’re from an orphanage, I’m sure you’ve had worse done to you!”

“NO. No I have not!” I objected.

“You mean you were never beaten up by the guards until you turned blue; or left for dead in a ditch at the edge of a field?” She gaped at me with such intensity as she said these words.

“No. Never. Guards would have never done that to anyone. It’s true we lacked food. We were cold in the winter and too hot in the summer. But they never would have laid a hand on us.”

“Oh!” was her only answer.

She looked both confused and disappointed.

“I’m sorry,” I said sheepishly.

And I really was sorry for her. If that was what her life had been like at her orphanage, then she must have had a horrible experience. I couldn’t imagine anyone hurting or wanting to hurt someone as badly as she had just described.

I caught her hiding a tear that had fallen down her cheek.

It was Arno that ended the discussion: “Well I guess we’ve all had a very different life experience so far. Regardless, no one should be put in those work camps. No one should be worked to death. It doesn’t matter if you were beaten up or starved. Every human deserves to be treated with dignity…”

“… and that includes us!” added Eli with great conviction.

We could all agree on that.

It was decided then. I got up and followed them to the kitchen completely unconvinced.