Kick bars. Boot bars. They have a lot of names. The best ones are in the city of Neon Love. It costs a lot of money to get in, but that's just because the Mastals tax it so much. There's always a warm hum from the neon lights and wall screens. You can order anything from them. Place your hologram and slide it down the counter with the drinks. Hope they aren't understaffed today. They usually take girls with nice legs and that includes me. It better include me. I didn't grow up in foster homes just to be excluded.

~Lenoa – My Second Diary

I check my hand for more blood. None was showing up and my wound was just about healed. The healing cloth really sped up the process. They use herbs they collect deep underground where there is life. They've been collecting them for years just like the pain-killing gases that I wish I had more of.

I look at Kaloas. It was dark outside, but people were everywhere on the outskirts. The outskirts of Snowfell Palace are on the surface, maybe in a few places below. I look around me at he run-down buildings. Weathered shingles hold to the roofs and smoke rises through the gaps and holes. People are gathered around an industrial barrel letting the fire warm their faces. Sprinkled in between it all are yellows, blues, and pinks of neon. Next to the darkened gaps were the well lit areas. They were the least welcoming in the town area. That's where everyone collected and there were sure to be pickpockets and disagreements. I head in the direction of the lights.

I push by a few people trying to keep up with Kaloas. He had picked up on a scent for me since I was quiet all day and let him think. He was finding me something to take. The snow crunches as I keep track of his tail. I needed a new victim to trick. Someone without a Shasi. I wasn't looking for a fight.

The outskirts are filled with all kinds of people. The different clothing, smells. All kinds of trash was in the snow that you could slip on. On top of the trash were the many scavengers looking for anything useful among the leftovers from the imports the Palace area received. Supplies varied I learned, but for one month I was safe. That's when the next purge would happen and I didn't care. I was going to make most of my time. I wish I hadn't left the Mayor's suitcase on the torture ship. I never can stop thinking about it and regretting it.

“Would you hurry and find someone? I only have a month.”

I let Kaloas down after giving him an urgent stare. He moped around for a while and looked back at me. He didn't like when I conned people. He always told me random things. I felt bad, but this was what my parents left me. Sometimes you're just too used to moving forward you don't realize you're moving backward. It was better than being a prostitute.

I follow Kaloas through winding masses of people crowding around a main street outside. My throat was numb from the cold, but Kaloas was taking us to an kick bar. You probably don't know what that is, but I know from the fairy tales. I'll show you.

“This way,” flashes Kaloas. He leads me into a pack of people and through a door. It was permanently kept open from the all the people. I walk inside,

“It's so....unnatural,” flashes Kaloas

“Yes. It is, isn't it,” I look back.

The inside of the bars was filled with smoke and loud people. Everyone was either laughing or complaining in the ruckus. You had your home world immigrants, mercenaries, mercenary wannabes, traders, Shasi kidnappers - pretty much everyone you can think of. This particular bar was packed, so the groups blended together. The loud music didn't help either. Neither did the occasional shout to the girls standing on the bar counter. They were the kickers. At least it felt lively and that's what I needed.

“Don't let us separate.” I glance at Kaloas as someone bumps into me.

Some disgruntled mercenaries had busted one of the Mastal supply chains and stole all their rations of beer. That was the rumor. Worse than food, but they were making the most of it. Some even said they stole the alcohol on purpose to sell to the duchess. It was free for me, so I didn't care. The rations weren't coming like normal, I just had to wait. The home world was having trouble delivering its charity. The rumor was the Mastals were out for revenge killing the supply lines. This bar had the only meal I would eat for a couple days. A daily drink a few times a day.

The smell of cigarettes and smoking herbs fills my nose. It was a bit familiar and a bit different from other kick bars I had been to long ago. This was a really trashy one without any food to spare. I would have to come back to pickpocket some people over the next month.

I clenched my meal ticket tightly and pushed my way to the counter. The top of the counter was filled and covered with even ice inches thick. Several girls were standing on it, pulling tickets and filling drinks from near the ceiling. It kept people from sneaking behind and stealing at ground level. Less accessible and not in the back where you could steal without the taking center stage. The boots kept the girls from slipping on the ice. All I could see was their nylons. I watch in amazement as a thermos is lidded with a snap, drops, and is kicked across the counter toward one of the many hands. One of the women points to me. It was just like the Shasis' stories. The beautiful ones who walked on the ice.

I gaze up at an attractive woman. She was a citizen, not a newcomer. I could tell. Healthier.

“Ticket? Type?”

Type? I wasn't aware of the choices. I just wanted my drink, then head to a safer place.

Some beer from the home world was poured and before I knew it I heard a skid. A thermos was sliding toward me. There were so many flavors from all the different peoples and cultures that lived on the other planet. I reach close to a kicker's foot who steps over me with a smile. Neon was everywhere and the outlines of foreign dancing girls and hot food lit up the crowded walls. Music made people forget their worries and there was an argument over which song to play. I was starting to like it. It was a good place to find something. I try to keep track of Kaloas through all the sweet-smelling smoke. Someone shouts something derogatory at us newcomers, but I don't let it bother me. Another man tries to grab me and ask if I need some time alone with someone tonight. Kaloas quickly bites his arm and he curses me. A few moments later, Kaloas had found someone for me. I knew the tone of his growl. A man at the side of the room was trying to make his way out. He had no Shasi.

I push hard against the many bodies until I squeeze myself out the doors. The open cold leaves me refreshed.

“Hey!” I run up to the man as Kaloas dashes behind him. He wasn't letting him go anywhere.

“Hello. Who are you?” asks the man.

“I'm Lenoa. I'm from...I'm not from here,” I gasp catching my breath

“Audris. Nice to meet you. Leaving the human toilet like me?”

I laugh and continue to pretend I'm out of breath.

“I was shouting at you inside... I was trying to get your attention. They gave you an empty thermos. You have to go back. Don't let them cheat you. Let me see your thermos. I'll show you, Shake it. It feels full right?”

I let Audris shake his thermos.

“Yes.”

“Well let me show you what they do.” Audris hands me his thermos and I make a run for it. I may be a light weight, but two beers are always better than one. It takes Audris a few moments before he realized what happened.

“Hey....hey come back here!”

Now, you might be wondering why I would steal some beer. That wasn't what I was after. That was just the celebration. I was laughing and having the best time again. A few moments later, Kaloas comes running up with a revolver in his mouth. It was tucked by Audris's side and I knew I could get something good for it.

Kaloas easily outruns me. He stops a distance ahead of me and waits until our eyes connect

“I'm only doing this to protect you.”

“Mmhmm. Beer keeps me safe,” I laugh back.

Kaloas never likes when I say things like that. He knew I was egging him on. Audris was catching up, but before he could, Kaloas charges him and scares him off a few times. The problem was Audris didn't seem afraid of the Shasis like most people. He knew they were smart, but he could also tell Kaloas was only doing this to help me. Don't ask me how. I'm not going to explain. Audris followed us all the way back to our temporary bunk area. He was still angry, but calmer from trying to keep up with us. He was mindful of the distance, but began to approach.

“Why don't you bite him?”

Kaloas looks at me and sits down. He rests his head on his paws and just waits. He didn't care. He had gotten me the revolver. As Audris approaches, I point it at him.

“Don't come any closer,” I threaten.

Audris puts his hands up in front of him.

“I don't care. Ok? Just give me my drink back and we'll call it even.”

I felt bad. Audris didn't have a Shasi and I knew what that meant. Growing up, going to school, it was harsh especially in the foster home. There were always a few kids who never got one. The sensitive ones were always bullied for it. I toss Audris's thermos back to him and he holds it up with a nod.

“See? No problems here, Lenoa. Just let me have my peace.”

Audris began to walk away and Kaloas looked up at me. He was just observing and I could tell he was disappointed again. It was like he was disappointed in both of us, but he wanted to make me happy and keep his promise. He still felt bad about my head wound. I made him feel bad the whole time until it healed. Deep inside I wasn't too proud of myself.

“Yeah yeah I know....”

As Audris gets smaller I let out a sigh and run after him.

“Hey. Hey I already have a Shasi to keep me safe. You can have your gun back.”

Audris keeps walking. He was still angry.

“Hey!” I yell. I get his attention

“You can keep it. I'll just punch you in the face the next time I see you.”

Audris turns around for a moment and smiles bitterly. I try to smile back, but I think he didn't care anymore. He just wanted some time to think to himself. I move my mouth to the side. I was still going to enjoy my drink. Hopefully it would help me forget. There was another free one tomorrow. Then, hopefully, the food would come again.

I pull Kaloas to my bunk. He was playing dead with me to be difficult and didn't want to go into the building. Imagine a heavy pillow only it says annoying things. Things that make you question yourself and wonder why he does certain things the way he does. It was mostly to get me through my life. Growing up, I slowly realized that he only did things because he cared about me and his planet.