She doesn't remember me either, huh?

I walked through the door just yesterday and she's already forgotten. It can't be because she has too many customers to remember, I haven't seen many people enter or leave this place at all. She's probably just forgetful, then, or cared just as little about my existence as I did hers. Either way, it would do good for me to introduce myself.

“I’m Sun, one of your patrons. I’ve taken residence in your establishment as of yesterday, although I’m sure our interaction was short, so I don’t necessarily blame you for not remembering me.”

I try to make an excuse for my own forgetting, while simultaneously excusing hers. It was probably better this way for both of us. However, she kept looking at me, as if there was something about me that she remembered that was just on the tip of her tongue, but couldn’t quite put her finger on.

“Wait you came in yesterday didn’t you?” She snaps her fingers as if she had solved the century’s greatest mystery, which was then quickly followed by a tinge of shock.

“Wait, you're that guy! Wow, you look so different when you don’t look like you want to kill everyone in our inn. I was genuinely concerned, seriously. Glad to know you’re a good enough person to befriend Anya though. She’s a real airhead, but the nicest gal you’ll ever meet. Usually.”

This girl really doesn’t have much of a filter, does she? Even though she looks older, I absolutely refuse to believe her mental age is anything over seventeen. She basically just called me a psychopath and Anya a dumbass. Anya looks absolutely horrified.

“Lillia, that’s no way to speak to a customer! He’s PAYING you to give him housing, and so am I, currently.”

“Yeah, but you’re my friend and he’s your friend. I’m sure he gets it.”

I do get it, but it’s still certainly in opposition with common sense for someone to say that to a person they just met. Whatever. Anya tries to get us away from her as fast as possible, and I’m not opposed to the idea.

“We’re going to talk over at the tables, ok? A couple of things happened at the guild, and we became acquainted. We’re not friends, but we do have some subjects to talk about.”

Good. She explained it exactly how I would’ve. She can take a hint, even though her expression clearly paints her as disappointed.

“Alright then. Let me know if I can get you anything to drink, ok? We got some pretty nice grog here.”

The girl brags about the quality of her alcohol, then returns to her slumber at the front desk. I wonder how this business even manages to stay afloat. It’s truly a wonder of this world, and there are already enough of those in my life to make me nauseous, so I’ll avoid thinking about this one for now.

Anya leads me over to a nearby table and begins her narrative on how she ended up in this place. She laces her fingers over the table and wastes no time in her explanation.

“Basically, I got kicked out of the house. My dad didn’t approve of me becoming an adventurer, even when he said he’d support anything that I decided to do when I grew up. I’m sure he had something in mind for me like being an alchemist, or taking over the family florist business, but I chose the most dangerous option I had. When he said no, I felt like I was being betrayed.”

She grips her hands tighter.

“His flower shop is not that far down the main road, so you could confirm this if you’d like, but I’d rather you not bother him. It’ll only make the reality of his daughter being in danger even more palpable.”

Ah, so she wanted to go out and kill monsters for a living. That makes her about as good as the rest of her kind. It seems I had misjudged her facade as kindness, and took her for only a medical beneficiary. Now, she basically admitted to assistance in the eradication of my kind, so I begin my plot to kill her as soon as possible. I need food soon anyway. How would I make it discreet though? She shifts a bit in her seat and continues.

“Adventuring wasn’t really the main point of my leaving my home, though. In fact, adventuring was only a means to achieve my dream. I’ve been cooped up behind these walls as long as I can remember. I wanted to explore the world. Leave the confines of my boring daily life as the daughter of a florist. ”

Anya looks up, staring a hole through the ceiling. There’s a feeling of longing in her eyes, but the subject of it was certainly not here.

“I wanted to see the flowers out in nature, where they grow and flourish. When they get to us, they’re already dead and gone. I can’t appreciate something like that.”

What?

“I’ve only ever gone on ingredient collecting missions to help out the alchemist in town. In fact, that’s been my only source of income since I left. She needs help quite often, so it’s not like I don’t have steady income, but I certainly don’t have enough to buy a house. Occasionally we’ll run into a monster or two, and I’ll have to heal other adventurers after they kill it, but I can hardly even look when they do. I feel… guilty.”

I interrupt her, completely unable to accept what she had just said.

It's one thing to go out hunting SPECIFICALLY to kill monsters, but it's a completely different matter to be attacked during a relatively harmless activity, defend yourself, and then feel guilty about killing them. It's like if a bandit were to attack your caravan, and then you apologized to their corpse afterward for partaking in self-defense. It just doesn't make sense.

“Why would you feel guilty about that? You were protecting yourself, were you not?”

She smiles at my words, telling me that she had given this topic much more thought than I had.

“Yes, I suppose I was. But I had a hand in killing something that was once living, same as me. That much is certain.”

I lean back in my chair. A human who feels for monsters, the notion is laughable. The naivete of this girl who had never left her home was simply too high to be comprehended. I wonder, if I wasn’t exposed to the real world as early as I was, would I have held such disgustingly optimistic beliefs?

Perhaps I would never know the answer to that question. Not like I needed to.

“That seems like an unrealistically positive outlook on life for one who lives in such a dangerous area.”

“Yeah, I’ve heard that more than a couple of times from past party members. That’s why they don’t stay with me for very long. They always kick me from the party, so I have to find a new one every few missions. Can’t blame them. Having a healer who won’t even look at them when they’re in battle is probably infuriating. The alchemist doesn’t care one way or another, so long as she gets her ingredients, so she always rehires me.”

She unlaces her fingers and places them on her lap, finishing the explanation I practically forced from her in a calm and courtly manner.

“And that’s why I’m here. I'm just a dumb girl who wants to live her life."