We didn’t have enough time to fully complete Deborah’s training. Out of the two of us, I would have thought that Deborah would have been the one more inclined to pull out her inner demon. Still, she resisted. Every time we would pluck out a demon from the altar she would begin to tremble and sweat. Gauss never looked upset with her but kept his face deadpan as the day after day made her face a new demonic form. Still, no matter how patient he was with her nothing changed.

When the day came to leave the stillness chamber, Deborah had made zero progress. I didn’t blame her of course. I felt as though I was losing my mind with the constant amount of exposure I was giving it from my demon blood. When this was all said and done, would I ever be the same again? Or will I have changed for the worse?

I was once a pastor. Now… I wasn’t sure what I was. A hybrid sure, but it felt more than that. I’m not positive I could ever go back to preaching the Almighty’s word the way I use to. Besides, who would want to listen to me? I held in my body that of which I was preaching against.

And to be the one to fight the devil… was something like that even possible? When I had spoken to people about his diabolical-ness, I always referenced to him more as something metaphysical rather than an actual being. Oh, how wrong I was.

Gauss called for us to come to the window, the window that looked into the church. Some months ago it had turned black as if some fallen piece of debris had blocked the view or maybe it was a dead rat. Either way, it had been impossible to see the current state of the church and I could feel this worry putting pressure on Gauss’ shoulders. He was worried about my mother but not nearly as much as me. Anytime I’d asked about her and what she was saying in that book of his he’d always tell me that if I truly worried about her that I would focus solely on my training.

And so, that’s what I did.

“I am unsure what we are about to find outside this holy and protected sanctuary, but I can tell you it cannot be good. Ira, I have not heard from your mother in a very long time and this worries me. And so I-“

“You what?” I asked him. “You mean, she hasn’t been talking to you through that book? And you’re just now telling me?”

“Because I knew you would react this way, Ira,” said Gauss, his eyes darting away from mine. “If I told you then you would have tried to leave when your training was not yet complete.”

“How long has it been since you last heard from her?”

“Months,” replied Gauss. “Which means hours in the real world. I assumed she was busy fighting back what she describes as a hell that of which she never thought possible. I couldn’t tell you any of these things, Ira. It hurt me to do this but it is what needed to be done. Auracle needed you to be at the level you are now.”

I wanted to say a lot of hateful things at that moment but kept it pinned within me. As of late, a lot of terrible words had wanted to escape my mouth but I knew it wasn’t me that wanted to say them. It was that darker side of me. I’d spent too much time with it and now it was threatening to take over.

And so, not finding anything positive to say, I just nodded my head. The sooner we got out of here the better.

Gauss remained silent for a few moments, a trickle of sweat beading down from his forehead and dripping down his nose. “As far as I see it we only have one option.” Gauss looked at me and put his hand on my shoulder, something he’d never done before. “You must find and confront that of which you already know. Use your senses and make your way to the source. Ask your fellow demons where it is and they will lead you, I’m sure.”

Gauss turned to Deborah and put his hand on her shoulder as well. Her face looked green. Over the past months, her ability to speak had seemed to all but vanish.

“Deborah, you will come with me and we will make our way to the Refuge. There, we will regroup with Ira’s mother and help her to take back that of which is ours. We can do this, you two! We can save Auracle and all of its wonderful people! You’ve both trained very hard and together we will see this to the end. Either way, we will be together in the same place. In the kingdom of the Almighty.”

Chills ran up my arms as Gauss finished the last sentence. To think that I could be dead in only a few hours turned my stomach into knots. I didn’t want to go through with this. All of it still felt so surreal… but this was my reality now and I chose right then to believe that this was my destiny. The Almighty birthed this into me and I would see the end to his number one foe.

“Let’s do it,” I said.

Gauss smiled at me and nodded his head. The three of us walked around the window and to the altar. That was when Deborah stopped halfway, her arms wrapped around herself. She was shaking.

“What’s wrong, Deborah?” I asked her.

“I can’t do it,” she said, her eyes looking down at my feet.

“Of course, you can. It’s like Gauss said, we are all in this together.”

Deborah was shaking her head now, her bottom lip trembling. Her visage had turned from a light green to a dark blue. She was scared out of her mind. But could I blame her? She’d died once already from a demon, did she really want to possibly go through it again? Of course not.

Gauss’s eyes closed and he bowed his head towards her. He was probably thinking the same thing I was. She’d already sacrificed herself enough for this cause. She’d given her life for it. It wasn’t fair to ask her to do it again.

And so we left her.

Gauss and I put our hands on the altar and imagined ourselves back at the church. The last thing my eyes saw was a frightened version of Deborah I never thought possible. I wanted to tell her how I felt at that moment but was pulled off my feet and forced into the altar.

Much like the first time going through the portal, I could feel myself being stretched and contorted in odd ways. I picked my head up and could see the end destination in a small circle surrounded by spiraling blue, green, purple, and yellow lights as I made my ways towards it.

I shut my eyes and waited patiently to make my arrival at the church. But that isn’t where I ended up.

Suddenly, I felt something boiling hot grip around my waist and rip me out of the stillness chamber’s vortex. Whatever it was that had a hold of me, it felt as though hot tea was constantly being poured over my open flesh. My body banged against a rough feeling wall and then another. My head cracked against what felt like a rock.

Then, there was nothing. My lungs couldn’t pull in oxygen as there was none where I was at. My tongue was dry and covered with dry hot ash. The heat was unimaginable. A strong feeling of depression and self-doubt filled my mind. I didn’t need to open my eyes to know where I was at.

Hell.