Villainess 4: Janet’s Haunted Escapade

Red Pill 15: Afternoons, Allies

Of course, when they reached the top of the stairs, Ridley and Baron Underwood advised Kevin to carry Janet on his back, so she could hold onto him with her forearms. That way, Baron Underwood said, Kevin could see where he was stepping in his descent with Janet. And in the unlikely event that Kevin somehow missed a step on the way down and fell on his face, Ridley added, he’d at least break Janet’s fall with his body like a gallant knight and maybe win a medal for it, which coaxed giggles from Mindy Kessler and the Drevis sisters going ahead of them and put a smile on Janet’s face—

Which got Kevin saying, “Oh, hardy har har!”

Which got the girls laughing now, including Janet’s clones walking through her like holograms and commenting on how strong Kevin was and asking her what it feels like to have such a hunk like him carrying her around like his wife-to-be.

(“Really?” Janet said in her mind, deadpanning at her twenty-two laughing clones as if they were a bunch of bratty sisters. “You’re actually going there?”

“Only because it’s cute,” her suicide clone said.

Janet slumped over Kevin’s shoulders and said, “Ugh, why are you all being impossible right now?”

“Because it’s fun,” her clone said, and her clones laughed again, but Janet let it go. For now, at least.)

All things considered, though, Janet’s clones weren’t as ‘impossible’ as the godawful Prince. After thinking of today’s events during Homeroom 2 and lunch and yesterday’s events during Homeroom 1 and after school inside the infirmary and last Friday’s outrage in the courtyard by the fountain that afternoon, Janet decided that the Prince had forfeited any modicum of humanity she owed him. And that was on top of all the other incidents that have occurred between herself and Rosalie that Janet had divulged during Prince Blaise’s impromptu interrogation, all of them caused by that bitch, all of them misconstrued as Janet’s fault in the Prince’s love-blinded eyes. As far as Janet was concerned, the Prince had become a disgrace to his Majesty the King and a blemish on her memories for entertaining the notion that she liked him at all even in her childhood. In fact, so far down had the Prince fallen from Janet’s esteem that if he were to come crawling back to her on hands and knees and beg her for forgiveness, she’d drop-kick him over the third-floor railing and into oblivion below, but even that was too nice for him. Hell, if Janet had her way, she’d have him stretched out on a rack, till both of his shoulders popped loose, and she’d be gloating at his screams and . . .

(“Janet,” DeeDee said, “what did I say?”

“Sorry, sorry,” she said without being sorry at all.

“You’ve got a grotesque imagination,” DeeDee said. “Have you considered becoming a writer?”

“I have,” she said, “but I’m not that good.”

“You’ve got to start somewhere, you know,” DeeDee said. “All writers start somewhere, Janet, even the best of them.”

“Do you really think I can do it?” she said.

“You’re already infamous enough as it is,” DeeDee said, “so you might as well leverage your infamy and become someone you’ve always wanted to be.”

She paused for a moment and said, “You looked through my childhood memories, didn’t you?”

“I have,” DeeDee said, “and you’ve got wonderful potential. Consider it your first step to independence.”

“I’ll consider it,” she said.

“Good,” DeeDee said. “By the way, I’m talking with your father at the moment.”

“My father?” Janet said. “He’s with you?”

“Yes,” DeeDee said.

“Why’s he with you?” Janet said.

“I’ll explain later,” she said. “Do you still have the amulet he gave you?”

So Janet put her hand to her chest, where her amulet necklace clinked behind her emerald pendant, and said, “Yeah, I have it. What’s this about?”

“I’ll tell you when you get over here,” DeeDee said. “Just don’t forget to tell your friends about what you’ve seen. I don’t want them running off screaming when they see us. Just don’t mention my shop, okay?”

“Okay,” Janet said.)

To take her mind off of the unexpected development, Janet told her friends everything (save for DeeDee’s shop) on their way down the stairs, including the bit about going incognito last night to help her maid DeeDee Marionette with moving the furniture into Elba House. When they asked her if that was really true, Janet said it was and added that she’d met several oddities last night, including three talking statuettes and five talking busts and one talking suit of armor that moved around and welded a claymore. This got Lady Kessler and the Drevis sisters all wound up and giddy and asking several questions at once, till Janet saw Marquess Fleming entering the open-plan parlor area and running up to the group.

Are you okay, Janet?” he said. “Are you in pain?”

“I’m okay, really,” Janet said. “I just can’t walk until after four o’clock.”

“Five o’clock to be safe,” Ridley said.

“But it feels better now, I promise,” Janet said.

“That’s good to know,” the Marquess said, then had Kevin give Janet over, which he did, letting the Marquess take Janet into his arms in a bridal carry—

Which made her blush and say, “Father!”

“It’s fine,” the Marquess said. “There’s nothing wrong with being treated like a princess every now and then.”

Janet covered her blushing face in her hands, which got Janet’s newfound friends smiling and her clones reminiscing about their own Marquess Flemings carrying them everywhere when they were children.

But on passing the double doors of the front entrance, Janet found DeeDee in her maid outfit waving at her by the fountain in the courtyard. Then DeeDee put her hand to her mouth at the sight of Janet in Marquess Fleming’s arms, looking all worried with big moe-like eyes, which had its effect: Janet’s newfound girlfriends gaped at the cute thing by the fountain, looking adorably picturesque before the splash of its sparkling waters framing her dainty and doll-like appearance beneath the brilliant blue of the afternoon sky. So great was this sight upon them that the Drevis sisters rushed in at DeeDee and glomped her, fangirling over her cuteness in a suffocating two-person hug—

While DeeDee struggled in between them, saying, “Unhand me, you fiends!”

So Kevin and Ridley and Baron Underwood ran over and pulled the maniacs away from the poor girl, who now doubled over with her hands on her knees and wheezed on her feet.

Lady Kessler ran up to her and said, “I’m so sorry, Miss Marionette. My friends can get carried away.”

“That’s a hell of an understatement,” DeeDee said and stood up when she finally caught her breath.

At her words, the Drevis sisters bowed, and Jean said, “We’re so sorry, Miss Marionette!”

“Please forgive us!” Saraya added.

“It’s okay,” DeeDee said. “Just don’t do it again.”

The sisters looked up and nodded, promising her they wouldn’t, though Jean qualified their statement by saying, “At least, we’ll try to reign it in.”

“And why is that?” DeeDee said.

“Well,” Jean said, blushing, “my sister and I have a thing for cute things in addition to creepy things—”

“—and since you’re both,” Saraya added, “we’ll do our best not to glomp you every time we see you.”

And both sisters smiled at her like fangirls.

DeeDee just stared at them, then said, “Well, at least you’re both honest, so that’s good.” Then she walked over to Janet, still in Marquess Fleming’s arms, and said, “My Goodness, what happened to you?”

“It’s complicated,” Janet said.

Then the Marquess deadpanned and said, “Does it have anything to do with that doofus of a Prince?”

“Yes, it does,” she said.

That’s when the Marquess blinked, and in that one blink of his eyes, a pair of red flames flickered there for just a moment, just long enough to register in the photoreceptors of Janet’s eyeballs, but that was enough. For the warmth of the afternoon grew dense with cold within a ten foot radius where Marquess Fleming stood, till he continued towards the fountain and set her down on the ledge and took a knee before her and said, “Janet, do you have that amulet?”

So Janet reached into her collar and pulled out the amulet that gleamed in the sun, saying, “This one?”

“Give it here,” he said.

She unfastened the silver chain behind her neck and handed it to him, wondering about the surprise present from last Sunday, saying, “Is there a reason you gave me this?”

“Yes, there is,” Marquess Fleming said, pocketing it inside his waistcoat.

“Wait a minute,” Janet said as she looked at her father, then at a smiling DeeDee, and then back at her father. “Did you two meet over the weekend?”

“Last Saturday, yes,” the Marquess said. “After attending the meeting with the school board alongside his Majesty and his Grace about your transfer to another classroom, I came to DeeDee’s shop to buy this.”

That’s when it hit her, and that’s when Janet said, “So you spied on me?”

“I’m sorry, Janet,” he said, “but it’s a necessary evil. I’ll be using this as evidence during his Highness’s summons. The school board wouldn’t allow me to hire a guard to accompany you, but they did allow this much as a compromise.”

With that, he was about to stand back up, but Janet grabbed his hand and said, “Father, listen to me.”

“What is it?” the Marquess said.

“It’s about Donny,” she said, looking down at the brick paving between her feet. “I thought I knew him, but I never really knew him at all.”

“Then does that mean . . .”

There was a pregnant pause, and Janet nodded her head and said, “Tell his Majesty I’m sorry.”

The Marquess said, “This will be tough for his Majesty to take, but I’ll make sure he’ll understand.”

Yet the thought of putting ten years of her life into being the future wife of the Prince, only to get jilted in the end, was too much for Janet to take, so she blinked back the tears welling up in her eyes and wiped away the ones streaking down her face, saying, “I’m sorry I’ve failed you.”

“No, no,” the Marquess said, hugging Janet close and rubbing circles over her back. “It’s not your fault. If anything, it’s that bastard’s fault.”

So Janet cried away all of her childhood thoughts of the bold-faced Donny and buried him in her mind, for the Prince was now dead to her.

After a time, once she had had her fill of tears and wiped away the last ones, the Marquess said, “I’ll make sure to skin him alive when I see him, I promise.”

Janet smiled and chucked and said, “Thanks.”

Marquess Fleming stood up and said to her newfound friends, “Watch over her for me.”

“We will, my Lord,” DeeDee said.

So the Marquess nodded and headed back to his two-horse coach waiting for him on the edge of the boulevard, where the coachman opened the passenger door for him. Just before entering, he looked back and waved at Janet, and Janet waved back, and he climbed inside, and the coachman climbed aboard the front seat and urged the horses into a canter, turning around and heading back through the gates of the Academy and out into the Student Commons Town, where it turned into detour towards the direction of the Royal Palace.

All the while, Mindy Kessler and the Drevis sisters and Kevin and Ridley and even Baron Underwood were consoling Janet, saying that it’s going to be all right in their own ways. For Kevin, in particular, he said that he’ll beat the Prince’s ass for her, to which Ridley said that he’ll only get thrashed again, so Kevin said that he’ll get the better of him one of these days, even if it takes him till graduation.

Janet laughed and said, “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome,” Kevin said with a smile.

Then Kevin and Ridley played ‘Rock, Paper, Scissors’ to decide who should carry Janet to Elba House. When Kevin’s ‘paper’ beat Ridley’s ‘rock,’ he had Janet lean over his back and hooked his arms under Janet’s knees and lifted her up.

Then Janet looked at DeeDee and said, “Did my Father—”

“Yes, he did,” she said. “He came in just after sunset asking for a voice-capture amulet. He explained to me what he was going to use it for, so I sold it to him at a discount.”

“I see,” Janet said. “So you knew?”

“Yes,” DeeDee said. “Sorry for keeping it from you,” and turned on her heel and said to the rest, “Come along, everyone. We have much to discuss.”

The five members of the Ghost Hunting Club (sans Janet in Kevin’s arms) and their advisor Baron Underwood followed behind, asking Janet about DeeDee and the Marquess, but Janet said she didn’t want to discuss it. So they asked about DeeDee and the rumors surrounding Elba House, and Janet answered their questions, while Janet’s clones stalked ahead of them. As they followed DeeDee and the clones, an afternoon breeze rustled through the leaves of the junipers lining the boulevard, and some of the other students were either visiting the Student Commons Town or hanging out in their dorms. All the while, Janet got asked more questions, including ones from Kevin about whether or not the talking suit of armor could help him improve his swordsmanship, ones from Ridley and Saraya about good legend-tripping locations, ones from Mindy Kessler about rare grimoires specializing in magic sweets, and ones from Jean about topics on psychical research and local folklore.

To none of their questions did Janet have any definite answer, so she hedged it with a noncommittal one:

“I don’t know,” she said. “Maybe.”

Yet amidst her questioners, Janet noticed one walking alongside the group in silence, her club advisor Baron Underwood. She wondered what was on his mind as they rounded the sun-drenched Mariana House and entered the side street, where the lonely Elba House stood facing the perimeter wall in the shadow of its own facade. Its three-story facade and its double-door entrance and the walkway leading up to it were all grimy with soot, and the latticed casement windows stared back at them like the eyes of the dead, till DeeDee put fingers to her mouth and whistled, and a pair of casements opened on the second floor, turning everyone’s eyes up to it.

There stood one of Janet’s silent clones, waving at them below, so DeeDee said, “I’ve brought along visitors. Open the doors, will you?”

The silent clone nodded and closed the casements, and a moment later, the same clone opened the entrance doors, making the males of the group hesitate on the threshold at the sight of the double doors opening on their own. DeeDee entered first, nodding at Janet’s silent clone and taking up her lamp, which manifested physically in her hand with a green glow, and the silent clone led the way through the central hallway, followed by DeeDee and Janet’s talking clones and the females of the ghost-hunting group, save for Janet herself.

Yet the three males of the group hesitated on the threshold as Mindy and the Drevis sisters followed DeeDee ahead of them, till Janet said, “What’s wrong?”

“Are there ghosts here?” Ridley said.

“Of course,” Janet said. “This place is haunted, remember?” Then she looked through the central hallway ahead of them when she heard her talking clones calling to her (“Over here, Janet!”) and said, “Can you see them?”

Kevin and Ridley and Baron Underwood shook their heads, and Ridley said, “I wish I could, though.”

“Don’t fall behind now,” DeeDee called to them from the end of the unlit central hallway, where Janet’s talking clones and her female friends all waited for them.

They then filed through the foyer with its flickering chandelier clinking above their heads, the floorboards creaking beneath their steps, and on the way there past unlit wall sconces and silent double doors to empty dorm rooms, Janet heard footfalls echoing on the floor above them and wondered what her nighttime friends have been up to since last night. Then, when they caught up to DeeDee and the rest at the back of the building by the stairs, they all followed DeeDee and her guide up one set of half-turn stairs in silence, their footsteps echoing ahead of them.

Then Janet heard the voices of Sir Abram and Christopher Malory bickering on and on about who’s more useless: the suit of armor without a brain? Or the chatterbox of a bust without a body? And more voices got into the fray, and Janet recognized the three statuettes and the other busts jaw-jacking along like a bunch of cranky neighbors by the time they reached the middle landing. And when they reached the top landing, Janet saw several of her silent clones crowding around one of the double doors and heard the stamping of feet and some colorful words thrown about that made the men gape and the women blush, because somehow the argument had changed to a raunchier topic about who was the better man, which turned into who had slept with more women, and the like.

DeeDee deadpanned, saying, “Of all days, why now?”

“What’s going on?” Janet said.

“Ugh, just boys being boys,” DeeDee said. “All of you, wait here, while I go and straighten them out,” and she walked on ahead of them as the one-upmanship got bolder and bolder.

Then the clones parted before DeeDee, revealing two combatants in a war of sexual conquests, one a suit of armor and the other a man dressed in a jerkin and a doublet and breeches, both belligerents one-upping each other in a who’s who of rakish prowess. In fact, just then, just as Janet thought she wouldn’t hear more enormities assailing her ears, Sir Abram unleashed a shocker about fucking a duke’s daughter before her wedding night in the next room while her future husband was talking with her parents.

“Oh, you son of a bitch,” Christopher Morley said. “You think you’ve got me there? You think you’re hot stuff?”

“Try me, old boy!” Sir Abram said. “You can’t do better than that, I guarantee it!”

“Then you haven’t lived,” Christopher Morley said, “till you fucked a—”

And before their eyes, before the man revealed yet another conquest of another nobleman’s daughter or even a royal princess, DeeDee shoulder-tossed Christopher Morley, then shoulder-tossed Sir Abram, both men flying head over heels onto the floorboards. One landed with a thud like a sack of potatoes hitting the ground, and the other landed with a metallic crash like a knight knocked off his horse in a joust.

And while both men were groaning, DeeDee stamped her foot, shaking the floorboards beneath everyone’s feet and rattling the old paneling on the walls, and laid down the law, saying, “You imbeciles, didn’t I tell you we’re expecting guests? Yet here you are jaw-jacking like you’re in a pub with a bunch of wenches on your laps!”

“He started it,” Sir Abram said.

“No, he started it,” Christopher Morley said.

“And I’ll end it by throwing both of you out the window,” DeeDee yelled, “if you don’t get your act together RIGHT THIS INSTANT!”

Those last three words, uttered like a commandment from God, rattled the paneling in the walls and the floorboards beneath their feet in a stir of echoes. And there to witness it all, Janet and Ridley and Kevin and Mindy Kessler and the Drevis sisters and Baron Underwood and even Janet’s talking clones just stared, all of them with their mouths agape and their eyes wide, all of them stunned at DeeDee’s actions and words.

Time passed, and both belligerents got to their feet.

“If you haven’t noticed,” DeeDee said, pointing out Janet’s group, “we have guests. While they’re here, I expect you two to behave, or else I'll take further actions. Understood?”

And both men stood ramrod straight and saluted her, saying, “Yes, ma’am!”

“Good,” DeeDee said, then to the group: ”Come on over, all of you. We’ve got some business to take care of,” and she entered the double doors of a dorm.

The Ghost Hunting Club and their advisor walked through the corridor past even more of Janet’s silent clones with lamps in their hands, unseen by the three males. They all ignored the former belligerents as they entered the double doors of a dorm room full of bookshelves stuffed with curios of all kinds. Here Janet saw that the four glass display cases, one large one and three small ones, had been moved from their former places in DeeDee’s shop and arranged inside the room, along with their contents. All four display cases lay in pairs from end to end, forming a main aisle before the double doors and two side aisles along the walls on either side. And just like in the shop, Janet found a full-length mirror on its mirror stand in one back corner of the room but found the other back corner empty where she presumed was Sir Abram’s spot. Then she looked up at the ceiling and saw a single large lamp hanging over everyone’s heads and illuminating the room around it.

Janet then asked Kevin to set her down on one of the smaller display cases near the bookshelves, the case housing jars of monstrous bodies preserved in amniotic fluids.

He did so and said, “I’ll be over there,” and he pointed out one of the smaller display cases near the entrance doors that housed the swords and knives. “If you need anything, just holler.”

“I will,” Janet said.

While Kevin went over and ogled at the blades, Janet looked at her other peers. To her far right, Ridley and Saraya and Mindy were at the low bookshelf by the entrance doors perusing the spines of old leather-bound tomes with Ridley and Saraya talking about ghost stories and Mindy talking about sweets. Meanwhile, to Janet’s far left, one shelf over from DeeDee looking through the second bookshelf, Jean was at the third bookshelf on the back wall inspecting the busts and statuettes and figurines on the shelves. And right in front of her, Baron Underwood was at the big display case looking at the fossils and human skeletons. And around the room stalked Janet’s talking clones, peeking at the contents of various shelves and display cases as they walked by in pairs and threes and fours and other clusters. All of them were observers, and Janet had become the observer of these observers, till she looked up at the ceiling again and noticed something missing.

“DeeDee,” Janet said, “where are the tortoise shells?”

“Ah, so you’ve noticed,” DeeDee said. “Since there aren’t any rafters to hang them from, they’re all in my lamp right now. I’ll find a place for them later,” and she then looked through the second bookshelf on the back wall again. “Janet, have you seen a third pair of glasses last night? It’s not in the bookshelves, and I’ve already searched this dorm and the shop a dozen times.”

“No,” Janet said. “I only saw two last night.”

DeeDee stared back at Janet, then looked through the shelves of the first bookshelf full of elixirs in bottles and flashes, saying, “You know, Janet, I’ve been thinking.”

“Thinking of what?” Janet said.

“This is just my guess,” DeeDee said, “but whoever tampered with the profile books might have taken the third pair of glasses as well.”

“Any ideas where they went?”

“Nope, but that can wait,” DeeDee said and left the bookshelf alone, approaching Janet where she sat on the display case. “There’s something else we need to discuss.”

“And what’s that?” she said.

“It’s about the Prince’s conduct,” DeeDee said.

“He’s been absolutely atrocious today,” Janet said.

“Not today,” DeeDee said. “Last Friday.”

Then Janet thought about last week’s shenanigans at the fountain again when the vixen tore her own dress and blamed it on her and the Prince insulted her dead mother that afternoon, which apparently got covered up, according to Lady Kessler and the Drevis sisters. Janet bit down on her lower lip and said, “Why would he say something like that?”

“That’s what I want to know,” DeeDee said, then turned around and addressed the others aloud. “Everyone, can you please vacate the room for now? I need to talk to Lady Fleming in private for a bit, but it’ll be quick.”

And everyone else (Ridley and Saraya and Mindy at the low bookshelf full of leather-bound tomes by the entrance, Kevin at the small display case full of swords and knives, Baron Underwood at the big display case full of bones and skeletons, and Jean at the third bookshelf full of busts and figurines) acquiesced with nods of their heads and filed through the double doors.

Then Baron Underwood paused at the threshold and said, “Let us know when you’re done.”

“I will, thank you,” DeeDee said.

The baron nodded and closed the doors behind him.

After that, DeeDee said to Janet’s talking clones, “The rest of you, stay and listen. This concerns you all, too.”

Thus, all of Janet’s clones gathered around the display case Janet was sitting on.

Then DeeDee said, “Lady Fleming, do you know anything about your mother?”

Janet shook her head and said, “Nothing besides her name. My father doesn’t talk about her.”

“I see,” DeeDee said. “Don’t you think it’s odd for the Prince to insult your own mother like that?”

“You’ve checked that memory, too?” Janet said.

DeeDee nodded and said, “While looking through that particular memory, I was surprised at the Prince’s words against Marchioness Rowena Fleming, so I found her profile book in my private library. Guess what I found.”

“No clue,” Janet said.

“She was a former saintess candidate,” DeeDee said.

(There came a collective gasp from Janet’s clones, some with hands over their mouths, some of them gaping in shock, and still others saying, “Oh my God!”

And: “No way!”

And: “I can’t believe this!”

And the like.)

Likewise, Janet covered her gaping mouth with her hands, her eyes wide, and said, “Are you sure?”

“Believe it, for my profile books don’t lie,” DeeDee said. “That’s why you were all engaged to Prince Blaise, till Miss Edgeworth appeared.”

“Damn that bitch!” Janet said, followed by more curses from her clones.

“I don’t mean the current Miss Edgeworth,” DeeDee said. “I’m talking about the original one. From what I remember, Lady Fleming and the original Miss Edgeworth were both saintess candidates, just like your mother.”

Then Janet thought for a time about her father’s reticence about anything to do with her mother, who only gave out her name and made Janet promise him not to mention Rowena’s name during the Academy’s entrance ceremony at the beginning of the school year. She remembered asking her father why that was, but he said that the less Janet knew about it, the better.

With these thoughts rolling through her head, Janet said, “Oh my God! If that’s true, if my mother really was a saintess candidate, then that would mean . . .”

Tears now trailed Janet’s cheeks when it came together in her mind, because it meant that her Majesty, Queen Blaise, and Janet’s own mother, Marchioness Fleming, were rivals. And if the Queen had told Prince Blaise about Janet’s mother, then what did she say to her only son about Janet herself? Did it have anything to do with Janet’s father making her promise not to mention her mother’s name in public? And last but not least, was that why Prince Blaise said those hurtful words about her mother last week? And if so, what did he mean by insulting her and mother in front of everyone by the fountain on that day?

“Tell me what the Prince said,” DeeDee said.

“But you already know,” she said.

“Take ownership of other people’s words, Janet,” DeeDee said. “It’ll do you good.”

And Janet wiped away her tears and said, “He said, ’Only a witch can give birth to someone like you.’”

As Janet’s clones cursed the Prince in various graphic expressions, DeeDee eyed Janet and her suicide clone and said, “And what did Miss Edgeworth say about her?”

And thinking about Miss Edgeworth’s whispered insult to her yesterday morning in her former homeroom, Classroom 1-3C, the same insult Rosalie had whispered to her suicide clone before she jumped to her death from the top railing, Janet felt her clone holding her hand.

“It’s okay,” her suicide clone said.

Janet said, “That bitch said I was born out of wedlock.”

“I’ve also looked through the Queen’s profile book,” DeeDee said, “and the details in both books match. Do you want to know about those details?”

Janet gulped down her qualms and nodded.

With that, DeeDee turned to the bookshelf full of elixir bottles and flasks and gave three hard knocks on the left side of the shelf and waited. Then there came a small click and a heavy clank somewhere behind the bookshelf, and the shelf slid forward on invisible tracks and slid to the side in front of the second bookshelf with a push of DeeDee’s hand.

“No peeking now,” she said and stepped inside.

Moments passed.

Then, when she came back out, DeeDee headed back to Janet carrying a small tome in her hands and opened it to the last quarter of the book before handing it to Janet.

“This is your mother’s profile book,” DeeDee said and pointed to a long entry before her eyes. “Read all of it.”

“‘Lady Rowena Bartleby,’” (she read aloud.) “‘Status: Alive (at the time). Past event: After Prince [Conner] Blaise told her that he was going with Lady Weaver to the graduation ceremony, Lady Bartleby told both her father Duke Bartleby and her friend Lord [Arnold] Fleming and accompanied both of them to the graduation party the next evening. Rumors of Lady Bartleby’s infidelity erupted the moment Lady Bartleby and Lord Fleming entered the graduation ball together, while Duke Bartleby talked with King Sebastian Blaise and Marquis Weaver, till Prince [Conner] Blaise entered the ball with Lady Weaver to a collective gasp from the attendees.’”

Janet gaped at what she had read, saying, “You can’t be serious! Are all Blaise men like this?”

“Yeah, I know what you mean,” DeeDee said. “Read on.”

So she turned to the next page and read the rest of the entry:

“‘There Lady Bartleby and Lord Fleming and Lady Weaver and Prince [Conner] Blaise sorted things out with King and Queen Blaise and Duke Bartleby and Marquis Weaver. Since Lady Bartleby and Lady Weaver were both saintess candidates, and since the matter concerned the Prince between them, they all agreed to resolve the dispute that night via a magic duel between Lady Bartleby and Lady Weaver with the rest of the guests as witnesses. Lady Bartleby bested Lady Weaver in the duel, but Prince [Conner] Blaise sympathized with Lady Weaver and broke off his engagement with Lady Bartleby. Since that duel, Lady Bartleby became known and feared as the Wicked Witch of Bartleby.’”

“Oh my God,” Janet said under her breath after she finished reading the entry. “Does his Highness know about this?”

DeeDee nodded.

“How long has he known?”

“I won’t know for sure,” DeeDee said, “until I can figure out a way to open the Prince’s profile book without destroying its contents.”

“What about the other rumor,” Janet said, “that I was born out of wedlock?”

DeeDee turned to another page close to the end of the book and pointed to another entry, saying, “Read it.”

“‘Lady Rowena Bartleby,’” (she read aloud.) “‘Status: Alive (at the time). Past event: Lady Bartleby and Lord [Arnold] Fleming traveled in secret to an old church in the southern outskirts of the Kaden kingdom, where they got married and spent a week there together with her parents Duke and Duchess Bartleby. While there, though, the political enemies of the Bartleby house spread rumors of Marchioness Fleming acquainting herself with a coven of witches, becoming one of their sisters without her husband knowing. As such, when Marchioness Fleming returned with her husband back to his house in secret, she became the topic of several objectionable rumors and innuendos about Lord Marquess Fleming marrying Lady Bartleby to cover for her pregnancy at the time, which soured their friendship with their Highnesses, Princess Rubella Blaise and Prince [Conner] Blaise, despite King Sebastian Blaise forbidding such topics.’”

After she finished, Janet closed her mother’s profile book, then placed it on the countertop of the display case and said, “Are you telling me that my mother had to deal with the same crap I’ve been dealing with?”

DeeDee nodded.

So Janet hunched over and buried her face in her hands, saying, “God, my life sucks!”

“Some are born to bliss,” DeeDee said, “while others are born to misery,” and she took up the profile book and returned to her private library to replace it on the shelves.

“What did I do to deserve this?” Janet said, while her clones all put their hands on her shoulder and said that they’ll do everything they can to help her.

That’s when DeeDee came back out and slid the bookshelf back in its place, then approached Janet on the display case and took her hands in her own, making the girl look up at her. “That’s just the way it is,” DeeDee said, “but just because you’re born with the wrong cards doesn’t mean you can’t use them. You just have to improve the way you play with what you’ve been given, and you’ve got me and your clones and your friends and everyone in this room to help you,” and she pointed out the four busts and the three statuettes in the third bookshelf by the back wall. “John, Daniel, Martin, Thomas, will you help her?”

The busts came to life and said as one, “We will!”

“April, May, June,” DeeDee added, “you’ve been listening, as well. Despite last night’s mixup, will you help her?”

And the statuettes came to life.

“All right,” April said, “I’ll help.”

“Me, too!” May added.

“Me, three!” June added.

“Ah, there you go!” DeeDee said, smiling up at the three termagant statuettes. “It wasn’t too hard, was it?”

“Don’t push it now,” April said.

Janet smiled.

Then DeeDee stalked over to the double doors and opened them, and lo and behold! Ridley Woodberry, Kevin Sydney, Mindy Kessler, Jean and Saraya Drevis, and even Baron Underwood had been eavesdropping with their hands cupped around their ears. Now they just stared at DeeDee like fallow deers about to get shot as she crossed her arms over her chest and glared.

“How much have you heard?” she said.

“Not much,” Kevin said.

“Poppycock!” DeeDee said. “Tell me the truth.”

That’s when Baron Underwood bowed and said, “I deeply apologize on their behalf, Miss Marionette and Lady Fleming. As this club’s advisor, I take full responsibility for their actions. I know I should have prevented them from doing so, but I just couldn't bring myself to—”

“How much did you hear?” DeeDee said.

The baron clammed up.

“Out with it,” DeeDee said. “How much?”

He deflated and said, “Everything. I’m sorry.”

Janet peered at their sullen faces by the doorway and said, “It’s okay, guys. I trust you.”

“Thank you, Lady Fleming,” the baron said, bowling once again.

And the rest followed suit, bowing with him.

“Ah well, it can’t be helped,” DeeDee said, turning back around and letting them in. “At least this saves us from informing you of everything we’ve said.” Then she turned and added, “But for Lady Fleming’s safety, don’t leak a word of this to anyone outside of this room. Got it?”

They all nodded.

To Be Continued