“Lately I’ve become worried Joshua.”

“About what?”

“I know several people who can destroy the world, but none who can create one!”

“Creation is a mite more complicated than destruction.”

“Exactly! One bitter blowhard and everything is ruined for everybody! It’s very inconvenient!”

“Jonathan, you have fairly easy access to several avenues of total planetary destruction yourself. You ARE the inconvenience. Besides, why worry about it? There is nothing we can really do, unless you would like to join me in my quest?”

“No, I’m not nearly blood thirsty enough for that.”

“Better bloody than blank.”

“Even if I did, I suspect the ramifications would be along the lines of our current discussion. No, there is nothing else for it!”

“And what would that be?”

“We need to believe in our collective better natures.”

“Well, I’ll try, I guess. I’m still going to kill you though.”

Erin was having a wonderful time! Her mother’s physical presence was something of a rare event in her life, so any time spent together was automatically great. Even if the activity was something as pedestrian as buying drinks at a gas station. If only there was a better reason for this quality time.

Looking at the large semitrailer that was currently filling up on gas reminded me that it was because of Joshua, again. He and Dad were in the trailer doing some kind of weird tech stuff. Dad used to try to teach me about all the things he did, but it quickly became apparent to both he and I that my talents and passions were more aligned with my mothers. Not that I am unskilled with computers of course.

“Mom, why are you and Dad so obsessed with Joshua? He doesn’t even remember you guys. Sure he is a little hard to kill, but so what? I bet I could take him in a few years. I know you could right now.”

”I’m not so sure of that!” Laughed Marsha. “How can I say it? Joshua decreed for you to learn of him from him, not from us. I suppose I could tell you a little more about us...You’re father and I, we were both saved by Joshua at a young age. We were both in an orphanage together, one owned by something rather similar to a vampire. She didn’t take blood, however, she stole youth. Whenever a child “ran away” another ancient old desiccated corpse of some hobo would be soon discovered on the other side of town. We had no idea what was really going on.”

“You mean… Matron Lyrenna was real?” Matron Lyrenna was a scary monster I barely remember my parents scaring me with when I was a young child. She was a merciless taskmaster that made the children she cared for endlessly polish the silver forks, spoons, and knives. Then she would set them on the butter trays, dishes, bowls, and cups. Endlessly alternating, and if ever a child complained or was naughty, she would pinch their skin and pull until they were wrinkly all over.

“Ah… You have no idea how badly I beat your father when I found out that he was telling you those stories!” Marsha laughed demurely. “But yes, we knew her as the Matron Lyrenna. Anyways, one day our oh so kindly matron gathered up all the children and staff in the orphanage together in the dining hall for a grand feast. She told us we were going to have a special guest.”

“Was it Joshua?” My attention was totally focused on the story.

“It was! He was not the guest the Matron was expecting, however, I believe it was someone named Elizabeth. I remember that most distinctly Erin. She made us practice our greetings and I had a bit of a lisp at the time, struggled with the z sound something awful. I was missing a few teeth, just like that one Christmas song! Oh! Erin, you were sooo cute when you lost your front teeth!”

“Mom! Course correct! It’s a tangent!”

“Whoops! Where was I? It was… oh yes, Joshua had arrived! Matron Lyrenna got mad, they fought, she killed everyone in the room besides your father and I to sustain her through the battle. It ended with Joshua stabbing her over and over again with a butter knife. Not one of ours of course, it wasn’t silver. It was that most wonderful metal that you never ever need to polish the tarnish away from. Sterling silver. Incidentally, that’s how your father and I chose our family name.”

What?! Even our name has its roots in this demon's clutches? “What is so admirable about that? I’m sure he could have saved more people if he wasn’t trying to show off by fighting with some stupid butter knife.”

“Ah but he had to! Anything else that he attacked her with quickly crumbled to dust when it got near her, everything except that butter knife. I’m not sure, but I think her ability worked with oxidation or something and the Chromium in the sterling silver alloy was her real weakness. She was probably the reason why all the blasted metal in that entire house tarnished so quickly day after day too!”

“Fascinating! I bet you would have figured it out eventually Mom!”

“Maybe so. After that, we were taken in and raised by the Historians. The rest is, as they say, history! Now come along Honey, we shouldn’t stay too long in any one place.” Mom started walking back to the semi with a little bit more pep in her step.

“Fine. Oh! I’m excited for you to meet Bill/Ted! He is really normal, we even practiced sparring a little bit this morning.”

“Did you now? Was he any good?”

“Well he really just watched a bit, Joshua interrupted us before we were really able to get started.”

“If that’s the case then I’m sure Bill/Ted isn’t quite ready for your level of teaching. I would suggest involving your father.” What? That would totally defeat the point!

“It isn’t sparring with friends if my dad is there!”

“Ah, how silly of me.” At this point we had reached the semi and were getting ready to go. Another thing of note, there were police driving through the city everywhere. Joshua had mentioned that might happen but to avoid them and their attention if at all possible. All in all they shouldn’t be a problem.

Just like that, we drove away from the gas station and began aimlessly meandering through the busy city streets. I still didn’t trust Joshua, but I guess this little road trip turned out pretty nice.