The temptation to switch on the interface was nagging at me constantly in the back of my mind. I knew it would tell me everything I wanted to know, but to me that felt like giving up. My mind has always liked to figure out things on my own, and there was that admonition not to use the interface.

Yes, I would probably die, but at least I would have fun with my new magic before I went without some silly interface holding my hand. Standing up shakily, I went to the far side of the pool, far away from anything that looked like suspicious, out of place rocks and I concentrated. Nothing happened. I gestured at the water, I mentally prodded like I would something on my implant’s virtual menu, and still nothing happened. Giving a snort of frustration I backed up a few feet from the edge of the water and folded my legs in a meditative pose.

I could feel that power closer to the surface as I relaxed and felt for the rhythm of rushing water. I finally understood what I had to do. I siphoned some of that rushing power and pulled it into myself, as if I had always known how to do it.

My entire body tingled with the rushing energy and I felt all the aches and pains in my body flow away. My head stopped pounding as I started to fill that pool of energy inside me as I pictured a rushing vortex of power filling slowly up. I opened my eyes and focused on one hand and mist from the damp air seemed to condense into a tiny ball of water. I willed it to condense farther and harden, and my eyes widened as the water seemed to shed condensation before vaporizing into white powder. Cold snowflakes melted in my palm before I concentrated again and the ball of water once again condensed.

My head began to throb again as I felt the power drain out of me and I stumbled as I tried to condense more water out of the air. I had to sit back down again and, and felt very tired… and suddenly hungry. I fished around in the survival pouch but found it had no rations or anything. I looked dubiously at the small ball of line and the fishhooks and realized I had no idea how to fish. Glancing fearfully at the ominous dark pool of water next to me, there was the sinking suspicion in my stomach that if I did manage to hook something it would probably pull me into the pool and make a meal out of me, or it would craw, slither or lunge out and munch me. Food was supposed to be eaten; you weren’t supposed to be eaten by it.

There was nothing around that looked the least bit edible. There were glowing mushrooms, the rock monster things… algae and moss. I sighed and looked at the mushrooms. They had to be bad news, no way I was going to eat a glowing mushroom… still… wouldn’t hurt to at least try.

I had to distract the rock monsters a bit so I could get near them, as all the glowing mushrooms were clustered around their side of the pool. The first few times I plunked rocks near them, they lunged on them but they stopped going for them after a few taste tests and I had to start slamming their rocky shells with larger stones to make them angry, this resulted in them ineffectively chasing me across the cave until they gave up and moved to the far side away from me. I grinned as I bounded up to the mushrooms and inspected one dubiously.

Picking it up, I had a very bad feeling when I went to eat it and was about to drop it when my hand began to burn and I shrieked before throwing the thing away. It bounced across the ground next to me, spilling glowing iridescent liquid from the stalk where I had ripped it up.

The liquid quickly began hissing and spitting slightly, giving off a burning smell as the rock around it pitted and smoldered. “Ok… very bad idea.” I grumbled and paced back to the shore of the pool where I sat down to think.

I concentrated on the ebb and flow of the waterfall on the one side off the pool and let the energy fill me before I drew out a shimmering coating of water that was filled with my essence. The wound didn’t quite heal instantly, but it did feel better, and after I washed out the rest of the caustic substance, I watched the blistered skin on my hand smooth over slowly then close up as I kept that coating over it. I did feel a bit drained, and a bit dizzy as I kept focusing power into the wound but it did heal over completely in the end.

I drew on the energy of the thundering waterfall again I felt better, my head began to cease its pounding and the dizziness went away. I carefully scooped a bit of the water out of the pool and backed away, when something rippled across its surface. After putting a bit of safety distance between me and shore I concentrated. Drawing on my power, in that now familiar sensation, I tried to compress the ball of water and imagined what I wanted. A razor-sharp shard of ice formed out of the cupped water as it froze over slightly then it shattered, falling apart into white powdery ice. I roared in frustration and flung the water away. The water flashed where it hit, and the ground rippled and exploded in front of me, blasting me backwards and causing rocks and debris to rumble down into the water. I looked up in terror as all of the rock monsters converged on me from my antics, and I tried to sprint away even as I stumbled. My world was spinning and my head was pounding, making it hard to escape or even travel in a straight line. As one lunged at me sprawled across the ground I screamed and thrust my hands out in front of me. Air condensed, and a lance of water slammed into the creature, drilling a hole in its rocky shell, then waves of power entered the thing and it exploded, sending sharp shards of rock bouncing across the cave. This caused all the other monsters to halt in their tracks, then run for it, chittering in fear as they leapt into the pool and skittered under the surface.

My head was pounding, my world spinning and diving as I stumbled around the cave, clutching my throbbing skull before I slumped back to the ground and desperately grasped for that familiar power from the rushing water and I breathed a sigh of relief as it filled me again. It did feel like I could hold more of it now, as if whatever I had done had just made me stronger.

I finally opened my eyes and looked at the carnage around me. There were bits and pieces of steaming monster flesh decorating the cave as well as myself. A massive gory crater sat in the ground where the monster had exploded. I looked at what I had managed to kill. What was left of it looked like some sort of giant crab… or something like it. I reached down and picked up one of the claws, using my knife to pry out some of the steaming flesh of the creature out of the carapace. I stuck it in my mouth and grinned, it did taste like crab! I had had some crab before once, many years ago before my disease had worsened. Daddy had wanted to treat me for my birthday, and the happy memory brought back a wave of giddiness. I gave a hysterical laugh, then slumped to the ground next to the steaming pile of cooked crab as I happily munched on meat I pulled out with my knife.

My meal was interrupted by the skittering sound above me and I looked up to see something inspecting me carefully from the hole in the ceiling far above. Standing up abruptly, I backed up and slipped on the gore around me. The hard fall onto the rocky ground knocked the wind out of me and caused my back to flare in pain. Groaning, my vision swam back into focus to see that it was indeed a spider, about the size of a small dog and it looked very hungry as it began to drool and flex its mandibles. Panic stricken, I painfully pushed myself back to my feet and look around for an exit, but there was no escape. The first creature gave an ear-splitting shriek and suddenly it was as if the ceiling of the cave exploded into a spreading shroud of darkly churning ink that swarmed down the walls towards me.

I screamed, ripping power from the water as I backed up next to the waterfall but I couldn’t quite concentrate in my panic this time and even as I pushed power towards them, there was little effect on the massive swarm as they poured over me. Their fangs sinking into my flesh and spreading cold and burning darkness over me as my body went numb and for the third time that day, I lost consciousness.

Burning pain awoke me, and I screamed as I felt my body twisted in agony. I tried to move, but found I was bound and wrapped. I tried to concentrate, to think of anything that would save me but nothing but a growing feeling of coldness, and weakness before once again I felt like I was falling into a pit of darkness.

All the pain ended, and suddenly an interface window popped up with a countdown timer.

The unexpected interface box popped up in front of me before it faded and I found myself in that character creation room. I was looking in a mirror at my naked body, all my gear gone. I slumped onto the ground and sobbed. One small mercy was that the more I tried to remember what had just happened the more it faded from memory. I had heard about the effect, but it still made me shiver when I thought about it. I was endlessly thankful that the spiders had made a quick meal of me and hadn’t spent weeks using me as a snack.

I couldn’t feel any actual weariness of the body but I felt wrung out mentally, so I fell asleep, drifting in that endless void with just a mirror for company. I dreamed as I slept, strange dreams that were filled with the smell of rain and the rumble of thunder, the rushing power of rivers and the howl of cyclones. I couldn’t remember what they were about but they somehow gave me comfort and banished the nightmares I was prone to.

There was a beeping sound in my mind that woke me up and I blinked, pushing my ragged hair out of my eyes before I saw that I could once again enter the game.

I’m not sure exactly how initial spawns work, but when I mentally tapped the respawn interface the world faded around me, but this time I somehow felt the power that caused me to spawn. It was strange, but somehow, I knew what it was, as if my own power was infused with its aspect. As the green force faded around me darkness and the mineral, musky and dank smelling caves filled my senses.

Once again, I found myself underground, though this cave system was a different one then I had originally spawned in when I entered Endaria.

Ahead of me was a long tunnel with howling wind rushing through it. I smiled as I recognized a distant sound, the rushing thrumming roar of water far below me. The wind howled again and caused me to shiver and looked down at my body, I was clad in only a thin cloth breast band and rough loincloth. I had no idea where I was, and I figured that there was no sense in looking for my gear anyways since it was probably on my desiccated corpse in a spider’s lair somewhere.

I had heard that if you die enough times, you do get the option to pick another initial spawn. I had no real assets now, no supplies or gear. For a few moments I contemplated on just making a new character and starting somewhere else. I wouldn’t get starter gear though in either case. It was a one-time deal with your first character, first spawn. I was also told when I signed up, that I wouldn’t be able to leave the VR dive capsule until the first week of testing was over, or there was some sort of emergency. I didn’t think they considered a shitty spawn location an emergency.

I took a few steps, then stumbled and collapsed. I sunk to the ground and felt weak, as if my very soul had been ripped apart. This time I did open my interface and manually looked at my debuff messages, already suspecting what was going on.

I had heard about this, and how that if you died enough times you could actually cripple your character’s development, and the respawn timer would increase for every death. This was especially a problem if you picked a rather unfortunate respawn binding, and got camped until you were killed enough times for you to pick another. My spawn point was pretty random, probably confined to a single cave system or something, but you could bind yourself to a set location in a number of different ways.

The first being an altar to a god, not sure what that entailed, but there was also the option to use a spawn crystal if I could find one in a safe spot. One thing for certain, landing in a random spot around the cave system, probably near creatures willing to rip my face off was not something I looked forward to. I once again wondered at what time it was. Was it day? Night? I wasn’t sure.

My dreary existence underground did have the effect of focusing my mind, with few other distractions. Other than the wind and the roar of rushing water, ther little ambiance other than my own breathing. Luckily, I wasn’t really claustrophobic, and despite the narrow walls and passages, this place didn’t feel closed in. In the past, I had often been confined to medical pods or small hospital rooms for most of my waking moments, going without glimpses of the outside world for sometimes weeks or months at a time, with only virtual life inside my implant to keep me company. If anything, I was a bit agoraphobic and felt vulnerable outside that warm, almost weightless environment with hydrocarbon nanite fluid around me.

I padded towards the sound of running water. My only real advantage now was my strange new power. It seemed that being near running water helped me recharge, so that’s where I’d have to be. If something wanted to eat me, well at least I’d be able to try and fight back if I could figure out my powers. When I finally found the sound of roaring water, I found myself looking down towards a familiar inky black underground river, that was hard to see in the gloom of the cave. The crystals did do a good job of lighting some of it up, but not by much. Somehow… I knew it was the same river on a deep fundamental level.

This area was quite a bit different from that ravine I had encountered the river in my previous incarnation. Through the glow of crystal, I could see an actual path along it below me. There was a rickety rope bridge that extended out over the river far above it, a bridge that I had to give a dubious eye and wonder if it would ever pass inspection in the real world. I somehow doubted it, with blackened planks, and rotting rope.

A path meant civilization? I somehow didn’t think so. So far everything in this game was pretty much trying to kill me so my money was firmly planted on the idea that whatever used this path probably wasn’t friendly either.

Either way, I had to stick near water. Sliding down the damp stone I stubbed a toe painfully on a rock before I slipped, and my slide turned into a shattering tumble with me sprawling out onto the path, where I skid painfully across the slick, mossy flagstones. My body aching and burning from numerous cuts, I looked around for any way to get off the path and down towards the water. There! Right below the bridge I saw slick handholds cut into the rock, and a pile of rocky debris forming a small area at the water’s edge. There was an actual pier there with a locked gear locker that was formed of rough timber with some sort of caulking around it to keep damp away from its contents. I suspected the locker contained something to tie up boats or whatever they used to navigate the underground river.

There were a series of thick rope lines across the river going up and down river from the pier, and I realized that they were there for someone to grab onto to slow down and pull themselves into the dock. The swift current was truly something that was very difficult to navigate.

Looking at the locker, I got an idea while staring at the rusty lock. Sitting down on the dock I focused my power, drawing water directly from the river into a dense sphere and thrust it out using the same feeling that I had gotten when I had fried that crab. I didn’t exactly break off the lock off like I wanted, instead there was a shattering detonation of timber fragments and splinters that blasted away from me as I somehow blew a massive chunk out of the side of the wooden locker, completely missing the lock entirely. My head throbbed and I got that now-familiar dizziness from using my power before I focused and drew on the nearby river for a recharge. It took a few moments but this time it did come much easier. I also noticed I was less dizzy this time, and probably could have gotten another blast out before I would have been dangerously depleted.

I stuck my hand into the hole and fished around inside the locker, finding a few objects. I pulled a slimy length of rope out, that was attached to a rusty hooked anchor, and a small box. I looked at it for a second, seeing it was covered with wax around the seams, probably to keep out the damp. Popping it open, I grinned. Inside I found a small misshapen lump of metallic metal, and a scraper with a file on one side. I brought it up to my nose and sniffed it and scratched the metal. Walking over to a dry spot next to the dock I scraped a bit of the metal off, into tiny flakes then I used the steel chain and the file, it made a small spark that quickly caught the meatal, which flared up for an instant before dying down. Yes! It was a magnesium firestarter! Just the thing for such a damp place, it was much more effective than the flint and steel I had originally spawned with, but the lump of magnesium would eventually run out.

I wished I had something I could cut the rope with. I could probably unravel it and wrap it around my feet for some protection against the rough ground. But… luck would have it that the locker was now empty. I pushed the rusty anchor and its decrepit rope into the locker through the hole and looked along the bank of the underground river. I couldn’t really see an easy way to follow the river. This bank had to have been artificially added, as the other slopes were pretty much sheer cliffs.

I looked at the water for a while, resting down on the dock watching the rushing water while I thought. I didn’t have a boat…. But perhaps I could make one.

My first experiment with water, I had somehow made ice, or snow. Perhaps I could make an iceberg to float down the river on. The water was practically subzero already, and I doubted it would easily melt my ride. Ice would float, I would float. Hopefully I wouldn’t end up at the pool of spider death this time.

It would have to be a decently sized iceberg, and I’d have to find something to put between me and the ice. I looked at the gravel around me and smiled. I could cover the top of the iceberg with some gravel and dirt. First though I would have to try and make my new boat. This would take some doing.