The cave entrance was enormous, easily ten times Mark's size in height. Mark couldn't see the end of the cavern due to the lack of light, so he was very cautious as he stepped inside. The stone wall of the cave bore scorch marks, and even a large gash that could have been caused by a large claw.

When describing a scene or an atmosphere, many commit the mistake to describe only the visual aspect of it. But Mark had other senses too, and he was determined to provide the readers as much sensory information as he could.

It was very silent. Birds chirped in the distance and his boots crunched on the rocky soil, but he couldn't hear anything else. The smell of sulfur permeated the air. It wasn't too prominent in the entrance, but it became stronger as he went deeper and deeper inside.

The air was hot against Mark's skin, and he began to sweat lightly. He touched the claw mark on the stone. The stone was rock solid, he could feel it. Something had large claws capable to cut stone like hot knife through butter. Mark also touched the scorch marks on the wall. It resulted in nothing, except that his hands became dirty now. Next, he tasted the wall. It was kind of salty, which contrasted sharply with the soil that tasted like dirt.

"Wphat tzhe fcuk!" Mark cursed, spitting out the dirt from his mouth. His exclamation didn't go unanswered.

"ROOOAAAR!" roared something that was roaring.

Suddenly, a green dragon charged out from the depths of the cavern. Mark could now understand why the cave entrance was so large. This beast was enormous!

"Oh, shit!" Mark exclaimed in fright. He only had a rusty dagger as a weapon. OP as he was, he doubted he'd be match for a lv100 boss monster.

"Watch your mouth, you two-legged dirt-licker!" the dragon roared, then pointed a claw at Mark. "!"

A large beam of light erupted from the dragon's finger, and hit Mark squarely in the chest. Mark screamed in surprise, but when the light dissipated, he appeared to be still intact. He checked his HP, and sure enough, he was still full.

"What the f*ck was that?" Mark asked.

"Ah, much better," the dragon nodded in satisfaction. "Now you aren't offending my sensibilities."

"Sh*t, are you serious?"

"No, I'm not Serious. My name is Magnifico, the magnificent."

"Oh, okay," Mark said. "Well, I'm sorry for intruding, sir." At least he hoped that the dragon was male. Most of the time they were, weren't they? "I'll see myself out."

"Not so fast!" Magnifico thundered. "It's been a while since anyone dared to come here, but I'm glad you did. Did you come to rescue the princess?"

"Ehh, no, I just—"

"Then I challenge you to a duel!" Magnifico rumbled. "Since I could easily crush you by brute force, it will be a battle of wits. Just like in the stories!"

Mark was sweating even heavier now. The five years of training he received from Master Kawaii didn't include his brain. He didn't feel like he could win a battle of wits. But what else could he do? (Well, actually he could use his ninja skills to escape, but let's not think about that for now.) Mark nodded, accepting the dragon's challenge.

"That's the spirit!" Magnifico said with satisfaction. "We'll each take turns. The first one who isn't able to answer the other one's riddle loses. Ready?"

"As ready as ever," Mark answered diplomatically.

"Alright, then answer this: how many stars are there on the sky?"

"Eh?" Mark was confused. "Stars that are visible? Or stars in the whole universe?"

"How many stars are there on the sky?" the dragon repeated the question. Mark suppressed a sigh, and instead focused on answering the question.

"At least ten."

The dragon blinked in surprise. "Indeed, that is true. Fine, it's your turn now."

Mark's jaw dropped to the floor. He was correct?! Well, of course he was. He was actually really good at riddles. Yes, he could do this. Easy-peasy.

"How can a man go ten days without sleep?"

The dragon arched his enormous neck in thought. "Hmm, it depends on the species of this man. Is he a zombie perhaps? Or an arthropod? I also know a certain cat species—"

"No, no, he's just ordinary human," Mark said. He was sweating buckets now. Ordinary riddles didn't work well in this world!

"In that case, I'd say that this man is using stamina potions. It puts a lot of strain on the body, but I suppose you puny humans might be able to survive ten days with it."

"No."

The dragon harrumphed. "No?"

"No. My question was: how can a man go ten days without sleep? The answer is easy. He sleeps only at night!"

The dragon raised one enormous, clawed limb, and facepalmed himself.

"Ohhh...." the dragon whined. "Seems like I lost. Well then, you get your reward, xXxNoobSpanker720xXx. Follow me, the princess is this way. She's eagerly waiting to be rescued."

Wow! This had been easier than Mark thought. The dragon turned and ambled off deeper into the cavern, but before Mark followed him, he looked up at the sky.

"You okay there, buddy?" he asked. "I haven't heard a single sarcastic comment in the last five minutes. I'm beginning to worry."

While it was true that narrators had a certain degree of power over the course of events, there were characters in this world that even the narrators wasn't keen of messing with. Dragons were one of those things. It was better to restrain oneself in these situations. One wrong comment about how clishé dragons and princesses were, and the dragon might take offense! The narrator may end up being on the wrong end of the dragon's , or something equally awful! Just look at poor Mark. His dictionary was severely limited by this evil spell.

"Yeah, that would be f*cking sh*tty if you weren't able to b*tch about anything, you f*cking c*nt!" Mark said sarcastically, then strode after the dragon. He then promptly stumbled and fell on his face, because it isn't his place to be sarcastic. It was the narrator's.

Mark cursed some more under his breath as he got to his feet, and promised himself not to speak to the narrator ever again. It always resulted in bad things. Although the narrator wasn't actually sadistic (in spite of all appearances), Mark tended to break the fourth wall a bit too often. He had to be punished for his deviations.

"That's not the fourth wall," Mark grumbled. "I'm not talking to the readers. This is more like breaking the fifth wall. More precisely, the ceiling."

What an insightful protagonist! Too bad that while he was preoccupied by violating every wall around him, he didn't pay attention to his surroundings and stepped into a huge pile of dragon shi—

"" Mark exclaimed, neatly avoiding his smelly fate. However, before he could say anything flippant the dragon spoke up.

"Sorry for the mess," he said. "I ate my last housemaid a decade ago."

Mark gulped. "Uhh, no problem."

Magnifico turned around the corner, then stated, "Here we are. The princess is sleeping on that bed over there. I have to admit, I haven't checked on her in the last 50 years. She might be a bit cranky, so be careful."

"FIFTY?!" Mark exclaimed, his image of a young, blonde and busty princess shattering in an instant.

"Shh!"Magnifico admonished him. "Don't be so loud. Just go and take your princess."

Mark considered running, but he had to admit, he was a tiny bit curious. He edged closer to the bed cautiously. In the flickering torchlight, he could make out a withered old woman lying motionlessly on the white sheets. She looked like a mummy, to be honest. Her eyes were closed and maybe she was only sleeping, but Mark didn't think so. By all appearances, she was already dead. Mark let out a small sigh. Although the death of the princess was a sad thing, he couldn't help but feel relieved that he didn't have to deal with an old crone.

Just as Mark was about to leave, the woman's eyes suddenly snapped open.

"You my knight?" she asked on a cracking voice, and Mark shrieked in terror.