《200X300》Chapter 11 - You
Advertisement
Thanks to the sudden demise of Tusky, her wore off and the narrator wasn't fired from his job. Mark saved the day, so he would enjoy an insult-free chapter this time. Even Sebille did a good job substituting the narrator, despite being an NPC princess. She smiled proudly, then looked to the right and happened to spot a cone of magical ice-cream floating past her, just within arm's reach.
"Wow, thanks!" Sebille said, then grabbed the ice-cream. It was strawberry flavored. Her favorite!
"I don't get any?" Mark asked, pouting like a little girl in a very manly manner. But then he remembered that he still had a rabbit soup to cook, so he sighed and decided to bring one more bucket of water and continue where he left off.
Just as he turned towards the town... err, what was its name? Something with a T... Anyways, just as he turned towards the town— wait, or was it a village? Anyways, Tusky was coming from that way.
"Tusky?!" the orc scowled, turning her palm towards the sky again. "Say that again!"
*gulp*
KissMyTusk18, the ferocious yet beautiful orc lady was coming from that way. She smiled in satisfaction as she headed straight towards Mark. Once she got near, she got on her knees and turned his head upwards, exposing her throat.
"My life is yours," KissMyTusk18 said.
Mark raised an eyebrow, then turned to Sebille to ask what was going on, but the princess was just as clueless.
"I accept," Mark said without knowing what he is accepting, "But what is going on?"
KissMyTusk18 got to her feet and bowed deeply. "It is orc custom. The first man who beats me in a fight will be my husband."
"Say whaaaat?!" Mark exclaimed.
"Don't worry," KissMyTusk18 said, glancing between Mark and Sebille, "I have no problems with polygamy."
"Well..." Mark trailed off, "If you are fine with it, I guess it's okay."
He was the good guy, and he didn't want to insult her by denying her the right to exercise her traditions. If she wanted to submit to the first man who proved to be stronger than her, so be it.
Mark felt it was strange that he was the first man to win KissMyTusk18 over. Lots of players were playing Fantasiaia Online, but who knew? Maybe Mark really was the first amongst thousands. Maybe there weren't any men around this area, besides Mark. So far, the story didn't introduce any capable young man that could become Mark's rival, and with good reason. This way, all the ladies would flock to him.
Advertisement
"But KissMyTusk18 is a bit of a mouthful," Mark remarked. "So I'd like to call you Tusky if you don't mind. I think it's a cute name."
KissMyTusk18 blushed. "Really?"
"Yes, really."
"Then I don't mind, xXxNoobSpanker720xXx."
"Ah, call me Mark," xXxNoobSpanker720xXx said a bit awkwardly.
"As you wish, my husband."
Woah, wasn't that moving a bit too fast? It surprised even the narrator. There hadn't been any marriages yet—although who knew how orc marriages looked like? Maybe all you needed is to do was to tell your nickname to your partner.
"Say, Tusky," Mark spoke to her, "Do you perchance know how to cook?"
"Yes, I do! Would you like me to prepare dinner for you?"
Mark brightened up instantly. Not that he wasn't bright enough because of the prospect of yet another waifu, but now he was even brighter.
"Yes, that would be awesome!"
"Then I shall get to it at once, my beloved husband," Tusky said.
She smiled at Mark, then skipped happily towards the remnants of the bonfire. She was happy to serve her husband, because she had no real personality and she was behaving rather illogical—
"
—THAT IS TO SAY, this wasn't actually true! It only seemed like she had no personality, but in truth, she was a really complex character. The depths of her personality couldn't be expressed by simple sentences, but she was easily the most 3-dimensional character in this novel. In fact, she was four—no, she was five dimensional! A really great character.
"Nice save!" Sebille said, giving a thumbs-up.
Tusky whipped up some kind of basic—but insanely delicious!—dinner with her skills, and soon everyone was salivating over the meals Tusky had made. The orc lady also had a lot of other ingredients for Cooking, and a couple of bowls and utensils as well (which Mark totally forgot to get previously). Everyone settled down and began eating happily.
Things have finally quietened down. Now that Mark was well fed and didn't need to hurry anywhere, hopefully he would focus on progressing the story. This current plot was getting dangerously close to the slice of life genre, which in most cases was a sure sign that the author was getting out of ideas. But it won't happen with this novel!
Advertisement
Yes, this novel wasn't using slice of life elements just to drag the story out for as long as possible. It wasn't in order to increase the wordcount and the length of chapters. No! Ordinary and everyday activities can be interesting too, if our main characters are doing them. What kind of reader wouldn't want to read about how their favorite characters ate, what they ate, how long they digested it, and when they went to the toilet?
"And what they did on the toilet," Sebille added helpfully.
Exactly! There are so many itty-bitty tidbits that can be shared about these characters. It was always good to amaze the readers by how detailed the characters were. Slice of life elements were what made the whole world alive! Some readers may complain that they began to read the novel for the grand adventures and the gripping action, but those readers don't know what's good for them. In their subconscious they will appreciate that the author thought out a world so well that every meal is described in great detail.
So what if in the meantime, these slice of life elements aren't progressing the plot at all? So what if these elements don't contribute anything to the world or the story? So what if these things often just leave the readers disappointed? So what if they just increase the number of pages written? Asking rhetorical questions do so too.
In fact, writing pointless paragraphs like this one—or the previous two—increased the length of the chapters too, and it wasn't a bad thing. In litRPG novels, another great tactic was to post the complete character sheet multiple times. That was a sure way to easily dish out even more words. Unfortunately Mark's character sheet hadn't been planned out was a secret, so it couldn't be posted at this point of the story. But! Pointless paragraphs like this one could still be written quite effortlessly.
It was actually quite easy to write about nothing or just talk in circles. And since the readers are too invested at this point, they'll read everything anyways. Even if it was actually stated that the remainder of this chapter won't contain anything relevant to the story, the readers would still read on. That's why they are called readers, aren't they?
It is a strange feeling, to read on and on, and know within your heart that this last part of the chapter is bullshit, but you still read on, because you want to reach the bottom of the page. The awareness of reading something that is utterly meaningless, but still not being able stop. This isn't even slice of life anymore, this is just talking about talking. Writing for the sake of writing, and reading for the sake of reading.
Now, all those readers who have made it this far, no doubt expect some kind of twist at the end. Maybe the narrator will drop some extra information about Mark? Or do some foreshadowing about the plot? It could be ingeniously hidden in the last few lines. Only the most tenacious of the readers would read it, but it would be a great reward for their efforts.
Well, nope. No foreshadowing, or interesting hints. Some other readers might hope at this point, that this chapter would then at least end with something funny. One that would make the reader laugh out loud, a good consolation for all this blabbering. Well, nope again. This chapter will end without a single joke. All these lines won't prove any point, will be utterly boring, and would make the readers feel that they really should have finished this chapter several paragraphs ago.
.
.
.
...or not. Please, please, don't downvote, or the narrator might lose his job. Here is a joke stolen from the interwebz, just to make up for this annoying chapter:
A mother is holding her newborn son for the first time.
"I think I'll name him Thomas," she says.
"I'm sorry but that name is already taken," the doctor says, "But you can call him Thomas3 or Thomas97."
Advertisement
- In Serial54 Chapters
Regarding The Life of A Certain Fallen Noble
.. ...Every paths leads to the same destination... Five Saints, five Kings, seven Sins. One entire plane in agony. ..Chaos must reign... In days long past, several Mage Kings cut a path of destruction everywhere they went. Cruel experimentation, the creation of monstrous creatures, the tearing apart of families and mass genocide...There were few crimes the mad Mage Kings didn't commit. As the Five Saints were summoned in desperation by the races of the world, everything was already at it's darkest hour. When the fighting was over, when the Mage Kings were gone and the Five Saints had returned to their planet of origin, a World Council was erected to keep the the delicate balance from falling apart. Many eras pass. Lyle Greyborne. Current heir to the powerful Greyborne family, the only son of Adarian and Alyssa Greyborne. With the maroon hair of his Greyborne ancestory and the exceedingly rare golden eyes of his mother's Bathory clan, Lyle's talents can only be described as terrifying. These, along with his personal status, make him desired by many. After a young Lyle begins a relationship with one Sophia Alderton, two years pass by. Then a lack of trust coupled with a certain misunderstanding leave the two estranged and left on a sour note. But Lyle even still retains his friendship with Cecelia, Sophia's sister. With Cecelia, his loving sister Iris and Melanie--A young woman who recieved his aid some time ago--Lyle is content to pass the days in peace and idleness. Well, when he's not completing harsh missions from his combat instructor, that is. But this peace is ruined when Lyle's father tells of a mysterious group hell-bent on causing war between the human and demon continents. Later, when his father involves him and his sister in an incident resulting in Iris being put in mortal danger, Lyle makes a decision which could very well cost him not his life... but instead his soul. His status, his loved ones, his dignity as a human being... All these may soon be lost. His life isn't his own. Not anymore. He can only brace himself for the things to come and hope he makes it out with his sanity intact. ******************* EDIT- Author Note: Another thing, the cover photo is not mine. Obviously. It's just a picture I found one day at DeviantArt and thought that the two shown in the picture looked like how I imagined Lyle and another character to be. Simply put, it was convenient in various way and I also loved the art. From my understanding is is from a collaboration between artists Chocobikies and Pinlin. Here is a link to where I found the original http://pinlin.deviantart.com/art/Linked-456655669
8 137 - In Serial31 Chapters
The Strongest in the World
Nephew of the Emperor, the Firstborn Son of Terror's Mother, the next in line for the throne of the Jabarian Empire, victorious general, unbeatable warrior.. Gottfried Jabara has all that one could want in life despite being barely a man's age... everything that is... except a choice about what to do with his life. Iris Vansi Valoisin is a slave. The daughter of a once noble house which committed treason against the Jabarian Empire. And yet deprived of all choice, she has her cunning and her iron will.Conspiracy, treason, and terror in the heart of the Empire clash against desire, family, and destiny which will answer the question, 'What does it mean to be 'The Strongest in the World?'
8 237 - In Serial22 Chapters
My World
After centuries of trying to survive and living, our MC dies in battle where his memories filled with countless experiences and knowledge get to appear in his younger self mind, (but are they really just memories?) before the big change happens, allowing him to not suffer through the same mistakes he has experienced and make sure that the corrupt apples in society don't ruin the countless lives that manage to survive, ever again.Join us to witness the mystical and wonderful wonders of My World along with our MC, while he battles monsters, finds treasures and builds a safe haven for others to be safe and have a chance at becoming powerful as well, to be able to protect and live as blissful and happy as possible possible in these chaotic times.Please feel free to help me out, the more days off of work I manage to get, the more time for writing I will have and the faster the novel will progress. Thank you in advance
8 207 - In Serial37 Chapters
Days of Blood and Roses: A Magical Girl Thriller
Promises are meant to be kept, but a promise to save a beloved sister leads a group of high school magical girls into a dream of many literary landscapes. Out of this dream of Carroll’s wonderlands and Baum’s fairylands and Poe’s nightmares comes a monster that threatens to invade the waking world. Their promise forms the opening act of a play they can’t stop, so to prevent this monster’s debut into their world, they must play their parts to the end at all hazards to their lives. If you love quirky magical girls, bloodthirsty femme fatales, fight scenes, love scenes, twisty plot lines, fantastic settings, the possibility of dreams, and the uncertainty of nightmares, this story is for you.
8 159 - In Serial16 Chapters
Cries from the Dust (Working title)
A Science Fantasy thriller featuring a group of outsiders coming to earth for their first time. The hide among the humans, cleaning up their messes. As they do, they are fighting against a man that may be thousands of years old, and has been manipulating the time line his whole life. Each of our heroes is blessed with a specific supernatural abilility: Miranda can record anything around her through any of her senses, and upload those recordings from her mind to any inanimate object for others to experiance on touching the object. Peter Dixon can soul jump, allowing him to control others around him. Scott can take others talents. Allowing him to speak any language he comes across, mimic other's fighting paterns, and even temporarily give him the same powers Miranda and Dixon have. But their enemies have these abilities and more. There are a lot of scores to settle, and the stakes have never been higher. This is book three in the series. Really trying to nail the crucial third installment that so often goes wrong. For those just joining, here's what you missed in book one: When four children fall through a mysterious portal, top scientists try to figure out where they are from. As they grow older, they discover incredible abilities within them(Seen above). All while getting a visit from the other side of the portal. If you'd like to get caught up, a free copy is available here: Portals of the Grave Then there is book two: Mists of Affliction. This picks up after the devestating battle between Scott and his friends against his brother, Azurand. Our heroes are painted as the enemies in the battle they never started, but can't seem to get away from. Mists of affliction is currently available in the kindle store here Enjoy!
8 144 - In Serial35 Chapters
MELODY
"All i need in this life of sin is..." Kiara Palet is a 22 year old photographer from Harlem New York, her life is a train wreck and so is her love life. khari Sage Francois is a 26 year old poetand business man, h e was the world in his hands, he has the money, the fame, the respect and all of the women he could possibly have.
8 88

