Kiromir 33

The journey ahead of us spanned for what seemed like forever, the road biting at the tires and shaking the chassis. However, these uneventful parts of the journeys were the best, where nobody broke down, nobody got lost, and everyone arrived on time. Those hypnotic miles normally enraptured Niala, but not this time. She slept quite a bit, and I wished that she already had her driver’s license so I could do the same. But I wasn’t ready for her to grow up. Also, I didn’t want to wake her because I saw the pink across her cheeks and her tired eyes. Molting always took it out of her. Her fires took it out of her and the emotional upheaval of Gaff and the other fledges pestering her… She needed that time to herself.

My wingbases twinged and I braced myself for a gasping moment as I remained steady on the road. Niala let her wings out and curled them over her body, seeking comfort by immersing herself in her aulted feather’s smell. One day I hoped she might grow out of it, the tight ball of her form and the crowded wings over her body making a shield against the world. It killed me that I couldn’t do anything about it, driving.

We stopped for gas at the halfway point, checking in with our group to reach out to our ‘trees’ to make sure we accounted for everyone. Things looked good so far. Nobody asked for money yet. Nobody broke down, and we were off again. I prodded Niala to see if she wanted to get out and stretch her legs but she just curled tighter. I wanted to stick my hand into the confines of her space and wake her, but depending on her dreams, I may or may not get bitten or with her new fires, worse. Unfortunately, Gaffriel had a much better track record for waking her unscathed than I did. Worst case scenario, if she still slept when we got there I’d see about having Gaff get her up, as much as I didn’t like that.

Fortunately, my worries were unfounded and when we gingerly traversed a row of speedbumps, she woke on her own with a languid stretch of all her appendages as things slid and tucked gracefully into place. I loved watching her do that, so graceful and fluid. I would be lying if I said that it hadn’t been a factor in why I never fully broke her of it.

We made excellent time and arrived at the sentinel’s compound just past 5, trundling through a rough gravel parking lot. Since we were the last in the caravan, I always worried if they’d have parking for us, but like every year I had my own spot as flockleader. I counted down the days until Rolyn intervened and took my parking perks.

My stomach sank as I found the spot, just in time to see my mother coming down the hill. Her soft figure bounced girlishly and a bright smile covered her face. Even then, as she waved her arms vigorously at me, I knew that nothing good would come of this.

“Fuck,” I said.

“She looks happy,” Niala muttered, and we both glanced at one another, worried.

I stretched my legs as I climbed from my seat and pulled out of the camper. Shivering, I uncoiled myself and nodded towards Niala.

“Go get the trash rounded up, Kiddo.” She didn’t hesitate in the least when I gave her a task that meant she could avoid Rolyn. She rummaged around in the back, gathering the bags and bundles before piling them behind the camper. One by one Niala stacked the neatly-twined paper bags of our debris before scrambling off as obedient as ever.

I stretched my legs again and stared into my mother’s hopeful, manipulative eyes.

“Kiromir, darling!” she said. I looked over her hair, seeing the touches of grey kissing her bronde locks. So she’d done something, dye? Her bright eyes held a sheen of wickedness as she spoke, and I immediately reserved any expression I had. Any sign of weakness or disdain around my mother always ended badly.

“Mother,” I said casually. Despite us being fluent in Anil, she held true to English constantly and didn’t allow me to call her dyana.

Her joyous face twisted into a bright smile. The apricot-colored, loose flowing top she wore swished about her waist over some uncomfortable looking calf-length pants. Whatever it was, it looked restrictive an expensive “Mother indeed, Kiromir, come come; I have someone I want you to meet. The horizons clan leader’s daughter Brijit has her fires now, and I would love for you to chase her to see if you meld,” She said.

My insides clenched as my lips pursed. I’d seen Brijit before. But, unfortunately, her family tree didn’t fork, and it showed.

“Mom,” I said. I didn’t want to tell her. I didn’t like her in parts of my life.

“She has the most lovely blonde hair and the fairest grey wings. You’d make beautiful fledglings. Her brothers are so tall, and all of them strong.” Tugging my arm, she kept rattling on. Not even a hello! Mother rarely had pleasantries for me.

“Hi, Rolyn!” Niala said as she came back from her cleaning. She tried to save me from the moment, and every flicker of delight that mom had on her face faded to a scowl when she saw Niala. Feathers, it hurt me to see it every time.

“Niala. It is nice to see you. The children are all gathered by the pavilions if you’d like to go stretch your wings, dear,” She said in her best saccharine voice, sweetly telling Niala to go fuck off. It didn’t escape my notice that she didn’t refer to the kids as fledgelings this time. Rolyn’s changes, as subtle and slowly as they may have been, weren’t earning any favor from me.

Niala looked to me with a casual glance full of teasing disdain and strode purposefully away towards the pavilions. She took long, sauntering languid steps in a comedic gait, sticking her hands in her pockets. Tensing, my stone face went hard as I fought laughter and Rolyn mistook it for disdain with Ni. So, it automatically made mom smile.

They set up colossal circus tents every year for them to play around in with their wings out. But she wasn’t anxious to let hers out since she started molting. Thinking back on it, her wings looked ratty at the best of times in molt, and right after, the sleek sharpness of them looked so surreal with their jutting shapes. Freshly shed, in a dead dive her wings could whistle in the wind.

“So, Mother, I don’t think that… It’s not a good… I’m not….” I couldn’t get a word in. My lips pursed into a thin line that kept growing thinner as I waited for the moment I could finally explain things to her. I relished the moment she figured it out. Part of me felt excited to see her anger over it.

“Nonsense. She’s got one of those fires that everyone can meld with. She’s from a good bloodline.” Rolyn just kept going. We hadn’t had a full conversation since dad died, and it showed as she tugged on my sleeve and ignored my protests. Sighing, I pulled away from her.

“She’s what, sixteen, seventeen? No!” I rebuked. Had she even been ten years older, it still would have been unsettling. Being closer to Niala’s age than my own made it feel violating.

“You don’t have to bed her right away, Kiromir. Honestly, we’re just trying to secure a future.” False indignation lit over her face.

“Mother—“ She wouldn’t let me get a word in.

“Look, you can’t imagine what strings I had to pull to have her family let you do this.” Rolyn had a mote of panic in her voice.

I felt a shadow come up behind me, a comforting scent. Thanus was there, and a warm hand rested on my shoulder.

“Hi, mom,” he said, grinning wide.

“Hello Thanus dear,” She said, continuing on her matchmaking quest of power. She went through bouts of it every year or two, and I hated it. This time, though, I had an excuse.

“So I was just telling Kiromir about Brijit getting her fires. She’s a darling thing,” she gushed. I looked over to Thanus as he kept his respectable space. I could tell he wanted to close that arm’s reach distance.

“So, mother.” I started again— interrupted.

“It’s VITALLY important we get strong blood into the clans, and you’re pretty much our last hope,” She sniffed.

“I can’t,” I just said flatly.

“Why not? Are you turning down your duty to your people?” She huffed. I could see the cold rage in her building, “are you waiting for that creature to grow up? You want her out of the nest before you go looking for ‘true love?’ There is no true love. There are compatible fires and duty, and it’s your duty to try,” She said, her voice growing cold and harsh. Her aura rose fast. She emanated this agreeable air that made everyone around her just want to go with it to keep her quiet. That fire tore through minds like a tornado, insidious and violating.

“I am saying I can’t because I can’t. I found a bondmate,” I said it all in a rush, trying to get it out before she could interrupt me again. She had a look of sickness over her face and let a mask of feigned delight come over her.

“Oh? Is she with you? I must meet her. I hope she’s got at least some decent pedigree. I hope she’s fair-haired. The last thing I need is more plain brown in the flock,” She continued on in a titter while her mind viciously lamented all the favors she had to call in to negotiate.

“Hi Mom,” Thanus said as he closed the distance.

“Yes, yes, hello Thanus,” She said, “But if she’s not, that will be ok. I’ll just have to—Mom?” The color drained from her face.

“Thanus. Please do not joke about these sorts of things,” She spoke in that cold tone with agreeableness spreading around us.

“I’m not joking,” Thanus said.

Her lips slowly closed. Then her eyes closed. Her lips pursed. She took a deep breath, cleared her face of all negative emotion, and smiled at us. “I’m happy for you two.”

She stormed off without so much as a greeting or goodbye and made her way to one of the tents they’d sat up across the great field we had our migration celebration in.

A tent flap closed.

A moment passed.

A blood-curdling screech came so fiercely that the glass on the camper hummed.

“Think she’s mad?” Thanus asked.

“You think?” My eye twitched. I had a realization that maybe this is why Revik left, though I’d never say it… out loud.

“Well, that was a thing. Better than expected, even,” Thanus said.

And all things considered, it did. With any luck, I’d not have to speak to my mother for the rest of the visit, save for a cordial greeting at the opening ceremonies tonight when we sat with family… a sudden realization hit me. Since my leg bore the left, the Soulstar family line no longer held claim to me. Therefore, I’d sit with Thanus’s family. My hierarchy still stood, but every reason under the sun remained for me to avoid Rolyn as easily as my father had.