“Sorry sir. I couldn’t do it. I don’t know… I don’t know why. I just can’t.”

“Listen, Varus, it was my fault for asking you to carry out such a heinous crime.”

“But sir.'' The boy looked up at the Academ with watery eyes just for a second before returning his gaze to the Academ’s chest, hands clinging tightly to the Academ’s coat. “I am sorry I’m not stronger.”

“How can you say that you aren’t strong? You dragged me in here by yourself. You knew the exact proper procedure to treat cold sickness. You fed and nursed me till I was as well as I could be. And you did that all by yourself. Ever since I have been with you, all that you have shown me is strength. You, Varus, are the strongest man I have met.”

Varus only cried louder in response, and the Academ brought him closer with his left arm to comfort him. The gesture was short lived because a sharp, shooting pain travelled through his other arm as it began to tremble and shake. The arm’s muscle seized as his limb twisted into distorted shapes under his coat, wrist and elbow bending almost to a breaking point - actually, they might have already fractured from his previous fits. Then, a feeling of his bones shattering and flesh ripping filled his arm, as pain pulsated throughout in between waves of the seizures, signalling that this fit was a serious one. But he couldn’t act overtly. He needed to look tough in front of the kid. He extended his left arm, as if he was attempting a stretch, and grabbed his right, forcing it into shape and suppressing the signs of tremors before the kid noticed them. However, because of his attempt, the pain just got worse, and as the tremors and seizing slowly built up the anguish, the Academ could only grimace.

In the end, it proved futile as the kid felt one of the tremors that escaped and shifted to see the Academ’s right arm. A mix of horror, confusion, and worst of all, helplessness washed over the kid. The Academ matched that helplessness as he heard the kid begging the Academ to tell him what would solve the pain. But there was nothing that could be done. The kid fell to the Academ’s feet and broke down. Apologizing, over and over again, for his cowardliness.

“The boy shouldn’t feel like this is his fault. The poison had set in long before the blizzard came, and by the time the symptoms showed, it was always going to end in a painful death. It’s my fault for not being straightforward with him in the first place,” thought Academ Levedi.

The Academ tried to speak words of comfort, but his body wouldn’t allow it. Only a few coughs of blood, that he let out to his side, came out. After a few minutes passed and the fit slowly subsided, Academ Levedi pushed himself off the chair and onto one knee next to Varus.

“Varus, I can only give you my simple thanks for trying everything in the world to cure my poison, and when my time finally comes, I can say that I will have no regrets for any remedy left untested. The fit I had a few nights ago was a bad one, and I don’t think I have much more time remaining.” A few sniffles came from Varus as he said those words. “All men must face death one day, that is a fact of life, but many men face it alone, with only their thoughts to keep them company. Thank you Varus for being with me.”

A few more bloody coughs came out, and the Academ could feel the beginnings of another fit rumbling in his left leg. He needed to make this quick.

“During that terrible episode, I was not in my right mind when I asked you to kill me. It was selfish of me to have asked you to carry such a burden by yourself, especially after all that you have done for me in the last few weeks.”

“The farmers and villagers. Those cursed farmers and villagers, if only they had helped you earlier, then-”

“No, you shouldn’t blame them; this isn’t their fault. They are just good men and women trying their best to survive,” said the Academ, before thinking long and hard if it was appropriate to say the next few words. He sighed and decided it was. “If you want someone to blame, then blame Chief Professor Egris Khonen, and only him. He is the only person who wanted and sought this situation, and looking back, I was foolish to trust him. Don’t go near him. Nevertheless, we can’t change our past, only our future, so let my debts settle with me. You work on finding your own place in this world.”

The Academ had hoped those words would be enough, but looking into the boy’s eyes, the Academ only saw raw hatred, the kind that ignites when a child realizes how truly unfair the world is and the kind a man shows before he does something foolish.

“Varus, don’t risk your life for revenge. I don’t want that and neither should you. The world has a lot of problems and none of them will be solved by you dedicating your life to kill one man to avenge me. I told you about this man so you can protect yourself like I didn’t; I did not realize the extent of his spite and his cruelty. But however cruel he is, he is not the reason for children going to sleep hungry, men struggling with diseases, or women dying in bondage. Those are the issues that I care about, but admittedly, I haven’t accomplished much in the ways of solving them. There are only a handful of lives that I managed to change despite my years of work. Despite this, I can die happy knowing that I chased my dreams, so don’t chase Chief Professor Khonen for my sake; I don’t care about him.”

The Academ unfurled a piece of gilded paper from his backpack. He had written it for the boy in the past few days. Varus had mentioned having familial problems, but he had never provided any details and the Academ didn’t want to reopen old wounds by asking. The only thing the Academ knew was that the boy was a wellborn child but experienced a serious falling out with his father, so bad that he no longer used his birth name.

“There is not much I can give you in gratitude. I only just got my name, Levedi, a few years ago when I first became an Academ. It has no history and no legacy, and the only person to bear it is me. It is not the name of a famous academic or adventurer. It is just another trivial name in the annals of time. If you wish for a new start in life, it is a blank slate for your accomplishments, for you to make into anything you wish. Whether you wish for it to be a name that will bring fear into the hearts of those who hear it or one that people will celebrate as a sign of hope, it is yours to mold.”

He handed the paper over to Varus who held it with trembling hands, reading over the terms. It gave him full rights and privileges of being the head of a named family, as well as independence from any past he was trying to escape.

Finally, after finishing reading as tears rolled down his face, Varus looked up and cried, “I will. I will. I will. I will accept it. I will take the name. I will make it a famous name, and everyone who hears it will know that the world is safe. I will protect people and destroy evil. The enemies of ordinary people will shake when they hear the name. I won’t let you down. Everyone will remember you and they will remember the name, Levedi; I will make sure of it.”

“Listen Varus, my story is about to wind down and with it, my burdens and desires too; however, yours is just beginning. You can do an endless number of things in this story of yours, but out of all those possibilities, you will go furthest with the one that is your passion, not mine or anyone else’s. So don’t take the name and make it something that I want. Make it something you want.”

“I want a world where things like this don’t happen anymore. I don’t want people like you to go while evil men get to stay and hurt the rest of us.”

“Then give the good men and women around the world a path to succeed.”

“I will… I will pave their path and I will do it as a Levedi.”

Academ Levedi smiled the best he could, as the pain in his leg had grown considerably in the last few minutes. He then got up and took off his blue coat, dropping it on the young boy’s shoulders.

“You know Varus, it is tradition that a Levedi must wear a blue coat.”

Varus shrunk into the coat. He wanted to comfort the boy more, but a sharp pain shot through his leg, and he knew there was little time left. He staggered towards the door.

Looking back, he saw Varus crying with the paper in hand and coat draped over him, the room too empty for the child.

“I will be waiting, in the afterlife, to hear the tales that you make with our name. With your permission, Master Varus Levedi, may I be relieved of my duty?”

“Yes, permission granted,” the boy wailed, clutching the coat around him, as he watched his friend leave for the last time.