《No Face, No Life》005
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I didn’t see her again for a long time. Reiko never appeared on my doorstep again. I missed her so much, even the daily beatings. I went to her house numerous times to apologize, but she ignored me.
Her parents wouldn’t open their door, knowing it was me. They were terrified of me. I was already filling out and my natural looks were making things worse. The fresh wounds Reiko-chan had opened up a few days’ past made me look like I was a thug. The whole neighborhood was starting to think I aspired to be Yakuza. She never told them she was the reason I was bandaged so frequently. It was never a fashion statement.
I didn't have a plan for my future. Because of this, I assumed, Reiko-chan rejected me quickly. I decided perhaps if I applied myself more, maybe then she’d accept my feelings. I approached my father with a great deal more respect and caution. He instantly mentioned Reiko-chan’s sudden disappearance. That was my father for you. It made things difficult, to say the least.
The conversation turned eventually towards what I wanted to discuss. It was likely that what had happened with him and Mother had convinced him to give a little more attention to my concerns. He instantly explained about how to resolve the problem of my joblessness. I couldn’t really pay for a date even if Reiko-chan agreed. I’d have to bum yen off my parents to cover it. They probably would have showered me with cash if things had worked out better.
He offered to get me a job with an advertising firm. With many connections, and thanks to his obsession with reading those papers every morning, he was aware that they were looking for entry level positions. He could guarantee that I’d get a shot with them. We discussed it. I had no other prospects, but he warned me that the job would be pretty awful.
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I considered the matter until I'd nearly graduated. Not even career counselors could point me in the right direction. My father saw fit to bring up the subject of my leaving the house before graduation. He wouldn’t support my worthless ass forever.
I wisely accepted the offer. Thus, I applied. He smoothed the way with his connections. I terrified the interviewer, but my father’s influence was the reason why I got a fair shake. I started working, doing deliveries, office to office. This was all I focused on for a few years. I moved up to doing presentations as I was groomed for more responsibility.
Eventually I got a small office of my own. To my astonishment, I discovered I could be extremely creative. The advertisement ideas I came up with were so off the wall, they stood out even considering how crazy other ones running on television were. It wasn’t what I thought I’d be doing for a living, but I was working towards being able to achieve my dreams. I’d approach Reiko-chan to show her what I was capable of. I put it off a bit too long, mostly because I didn’t think I’d be good enough to catch her interest.
My father kicked me out of the family house once my position was secure. He mercilessly told me to find a place of my own. I looked for an apartment, and found one. The rent would allow me plenty of leeway for saving, just not as much as I had while living with my parents. I could save up for a marriage, to support Reiko-chan if necessary, though knowing her she would be employed too. I wasn’t sure what she was doing, exactly, but I knew her dreams.
By the time I was kicked out, there was enough saved up to put up a deposit. I’d already been focused on this for a while. It was a meager place comprised of: a living room, a bathroom, a kitchenette, a genkan. There were no ceremonies when I left my parent’s home. It never really was mine, I was just raised there.
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This was the first place I could truly call my own, and even though it wasn’t appropriate for a couple, it could be cozy. I envisioned many fantasies about when we’d be able to spend time together there. Having prepared enough to where I felt I'd stand a chance, I went to battle.
I approached her parents again. I chose my moment well. It was when her mother was returning from the market with groceries. I watched her there while she shopped. Since I went after a work day, I was wearing a business suit. Doing so, despite the impression it gave others of me, was a no-brainer. I’d appear to be successful enough to be worthy of her daughter. This maneuver probably further fueled the rumors about me. I followed her, and when she seemed to start having difficulties with managing all the bags she carried home, I silently took the overflow from her. She looked at me with a smile, but then her expression became terrified.
She realized I was Susumu, but more grown up. When I matured, what face I’d been given became truly demonic. As you know, I was sadly in possession of one of those kinds of faces no one would trust. She didn’t want to try to take her bags back. She looked on the point of screaming or running, but I placated her with a tactic which became the only way I could reassure anyone of my harmlessness. I groveled on the ground before her in my somewhat expensive suit.
She allowed me to carry those bags for her. Not only that, she promptly passed them all to me. That’s where Reiko-chan gets it. When we reached Reiko-chan’s home, her mother and I spoke.
Her viewpoint about me, mostly caused by the neighborhood rumors, was finally corrected when she actually came to know me.
I learned from her that Reiko-chan recently came into contact with many different men. She was worried about her daughter, which was possibly one of the reasons why she’d heard me out. She made sure we were crystal clear on one point: she didn’t want any gorilla-faced grandchildren.
This would pose some serious issues. I wasn’t sure whether my face would pass on to another generation. Neither my parents, nor my grandparents who I’d never met, looked like me. In any case, she was my ally. Winning Reiko-chan’s heart was another story. It was a Mount Fuji-sized ambition. Considering what I knew about her, it might be impossible to achieve, I knew.
Her mother had a plan. She told me to wait, but she wouldn’t allow me to enter her room to wait. Had she found me there, Reiko-chan would certainly reject me again.
So I waited outside, slouching against the door. When Reiko-chan appeared, she looked far more mature than ever before. She wore a beautiful dress. Our eyes met. I was filled with even more determination to conquer her heart.
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