“All the victims..." I muttered, quickly moving my fingers over the pictures. I noh-gulped. The sound echoed around me, but I doubted my throat moved.

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She waited patiently, and as she did, she noticed an idea had occurred to me. A slow smile bloomed across her face.

“I’m not among them!” I yelled.

“Wh-WHAT?” Oni fell over hard on her floor. The metal bat flipped up into the air. She groaned and reached her arm up to catch the bat. When she peered over the edge of the table, she was as upset as she’d been yet. “You were attacked this VERY morning! Why would you think I’d have a picture of you? Noh-brains!” she bellowed loudly. She glared at me even more frighteningly than noh-face.

Cowed by the killing intent emanating from her, I sweated profusely, turning my attention back to all those pictures, racking my brain. My shakes increased as she continued to glare, her eyes striking sparks, even more so as time passed. I finally gave up, clutching my head and curling up.

“Noh-nuts!” she shrieked, enraged to bound across the table, her little feet thudding on her floor in a fierce staccato. She seized my costume bodysuit and glared even more balefully down at me than I ever could. I finally understood it. This is what people felt and thought when I was looking at them. “YAKUZA!!!” I screamed.

She quickly struck me across my face. Had I a mouth, saliva would have gone flowing through the air from the force of her slap. My face sported a bright pink handprint. “They’re all beautiful people! All of its victims are beautiful and attractive! Do you have no eye for beauty?” She raged, shaking me violently. I flopped and thrashed.

Finally, I stiffened and stood up. I seemed to grow into immensity. She held onto me, looking shocked. I seemed to be a giant sentai fighter inside a blink of the eye. I seemed to fill the room, though I’d not truly grown, but rather it was determination which emanated from my body which made me seem larger than life. She looked up into my expressionless face. We stared at each other.

“Did you go insane? Have you lost your memories? Your heart?” she asked.

...........

The silence was deafening as I thought it through, the moment of eureka I’d experienced.

“Noh..." I croaked finally, and then corrected myself. “N-No! I found a flaw in your silly logic! Let me go!” I reached into my fanny bag, zipping it open quickly. She held firmly to the collar of my bodysuit. Quickly removing wallet, I folded it out and lifted it in front of her little oni face. She stared and turned white. All the redness in her face leached away. She let go, falling to her butt.

I stared down at her, noh-blinking. She looked at me with teacup-sized eyes, and suddenly she scrambled away on all fours, screaming loudly.

“A MONSTER!” She ran around her desk, crying loudly.

A sharp noise cracked through the air as though glass shattered. My eyes followed her quick retreat. I was stunned by how much her nature seemed to change in a moment. My old glare had reached her indirectly via my extra horrific student’s ID picture. I fell over and facepalmed simultaneously. My wallet flew up to land on my face as I struck the floor. Coming face to face with myself, I was subsequently stunned as well.

“YAAAIIIIIIIIIIIIII!!!!” My ugly face printed on my I.D. was displayed to deadly effect.

Her yelling and screaming paralyzed me, putting the last nail in my ability to function for a short time.

“IT’S OVER!”

“ALL MY EVIDENCE! IT’S GONE!”

“BURN IT! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

“MY WONDERFUL THEORY!!!!”