《Insanity Of A Reverend Reader》Reincarnation
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Reincarnation, reincarnation, reincarnation! What is that exactly? Reincarnation is the process of dying and your soul leaving your body for another body, beginning it's next life. But the system isn't perfect.
Like in every physics engine, or mathematical equation, there are some flaws in that as well. In math the number 0 fucks you the hardest, in physics impact(waves) fucks you the most. In reincarnation, being an MC of a cultivation story fucks you the most!
Sadly, I am that 0, that fucks people the most and the hardest. I don't know if I am a main character, but I kinda need to talk to someone and I am not talking to my self!
Currently I am being held by two people, who know healing magic and attack magic. Surprisingly, they aren't screaming the names of their attacks or healing spells like I expected. They only sometimes say stuff like "Feed the Gu!"
I am also being called a future Gu Gu God. Well, they are calling me a future Gu master worth being proud of, but Gu Gu God sounds more appropriate for a week old baby, who is going to become a master of Gu worms. There, I said it! Master of Gu, not Gu master! The master is more important then the Gu! I have singlehandedly offended everyone in the RI community!
Sigh. How did my life come to this? I don't even remember how I died? I was originally a slightly muscular, bookworm highschooler. Like the usual, I had my gang of friends and we were hanging out a lot. I was also quite popular.
I was decent looking guy, with a good head on his shoulders and a well-built body. Like most of my kind, I was also hella suicidal, especially because of a certain "incident", which involved a popular girl and stalking. Enough about those painful memories. Let's get back to the cute baby me making diabolical plans! .
A couple of months have passed and I have learned that my dad is a 50%er and my mom is a 20%er. Gosh I sound ridiculous!
Let me start over, being treated like a baby for months has messed with my perception of myself and my brain a lot. My mom has an aperture with 20% fullness and my dad has an aperture with 50% fullness.
Even thought My mum has low talent, she is highly valued by my dad's team, as she is a healing Gu master. My dad has higher talent, but C grade is C grade. He is also an attack specialist, so his worth is a bit less than normal. His vital Gu is the moonlight Gu. It looks a lot more amazing in real life. Seeing a blue wind or light cut through solid material is quite amazing.
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I also learned that my dad's name is a pun! Finding that out didn't help me entertain myself during these few month. Nope! Not at all!
His name is Gu Yue Sam Sung. Seriously, who the fuck named my father Samsung?! My mother is Gu Yue Noki Ye. Ren Tzu or fate Gu or whatever, screw you! Ya, I purposely misspelled Ren Tzu's name! What of it?!
Well, at least my name is not a pun. My name is Gu Yue Kai Nem. I don't know why my family name is Kai, but I don't care enough about it to aak.
I'll also stop with the Gu Yue clan name, as it is blatantly obvious where I am at. I also know of a special household with the name Fang, which had twins a while before I was born. I know this Gu world is weird and I am just a normal kid, but I have faith! Why, you ask? I have acquired a system! Haha!
My system is called Gu thrift shop(not the official name, as it has no guide or anything and that's about as creative as I will be in terms of naming!). I can trade Gu in for Gu mastery or Points? All it says is a number and a cost whenever I think about it. Let's go with Gu points.
With Gu points I can buy any Gu I want. The exchange prices are all random based on the importance of the Gu and the difficulty of refining(or not? I don't know! this thing doesn't have a manual!). The system also has the function of converting what you have into the appropriate Gu instantly, in exchange for some Gu points. Basically, I have a 100% refinement rate, as long as I have Gu points and the necessary materials.
There are no missions, gift packs or other bullshit plot armor aspects. It is just a system for exchanging one Gu worm for another. There is an infinite amount of Gu worms registered here and the one I want the most is called "Fate Flipped Upside Down Gu".
It is an expendable Gu under the category of cultivation and costs 500 Gu points. From the name it is easy to guess what it does. I'll still explain it. Imagine you have 1% primeval essence in your Aperture. You have 99% now! You have 95% primeval essence in your aperture? You have 5% now!
It is literally the most OP thing in existence. Imagine being a Gu master with 99% talent! I will be so OP!
Lowering your talent is as easy as pie, so getting this Gu is the same as a 1 way ticket to supreme talenthood. Is talenthood a word? Who care, it is now! So, I need to get either 500 rank 1 Gu worms or something else.
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Each Gu worm has an unique price, but I have no sweet clue what is worth what. There are no specifics on prices. The only thing I know is how much something costs and not how much it sells for. I need to actually have the Gu worm in my hand to check its selling price.
What kind of crappy system is this? It barely functions and does one thing. It is almost as if someone doesn't want me to be OP. Guess I'll have to take matters into my own hands.
I have always regretted starting working out late in my last life. You can't imagine just how useful a strong body is when you are under stress and need more energy, like during exam study sessions. So I'll first train my body using my mum's healing magic.
But first I am thinking of stealing Fang Yuan's liquor worm. The liquor worm Gu is quite powerful and even helped a 44% ass Fang Yuan cultivate faster than an 80% Fang Zheng. My dad and mum can use this to advance to rank two as well.
Even if I get a liquor worm, I still can't refine it. It is also better to acquire it while I am young and can avoid suspicion. No one would attribute a toddler finding a liquor worm to him knowing the future, right?
My father or mother will be the one to refine it and then they will advance to rank 2 relatively easily. My father will have a much easier time compared to my mother, but having at least 1 rank 2 parent is a big plus.
Getting the liquor worm means I can get a grasp on Fang Yuan's cultivation and just nip him in the bud after he reincarnates. Though this might be the first world Fang Yuan and not the second world one or maybe even a third world one. Gotta figure that out first.
If it is the first time he reincarnated, then I can just use him as a pawn. If he starts drinking, then I will know I have to plan around him. If I detect any sign of him knowing about me, then I will have to assassinate him ASAP!
Sprint Autumn Cicada isn't something to joke with. Rank 6 Gu are weird and the Fang boy is more than willing to kill that creature to save his life. Maybe him and I had some conflict and I won, so he had to kill the damned Cicada and came back in time?
Enough about Fang Yuan, let's talk Gu worms. I have also decided on my vital Gu. It is called body nourishing Gu. I really like this Gu. It eats calories once every 3 days and nourishes a human's body in a slightly more efficient way than food.
At rank 1 it can help satiate your stomach really well, boosting your body's natural development. Rank 2 is called health nourishing Gu and completely erases the need for food, except one meal for it once every 10 days. Rank 3 is called physique nourishing Gu and it completely erases the need for sleep or food, except, of course, feeding it once a month.
The downside is your mind still gets fatigued and your mental energy usage will keep incrementally going up the longer you stay awake. Staying up for days on end isn't good for your mental health as well. This is completely negated by the rank 4 version!
Rank 4 is my goal. It is called Perpetual Body Gu. It makes your body so self sufficient it doesn't need sleep, no mental exhaustion and can live on just 1 really big meal full of calories once every 6 months. The only meal the Gu worm needs is just a bunch of calories, so it is less costly than feeding myself!
This Gu is godlike! Not needing to sleep or eat means I can cultivate for 6 months without interruption and the increased mental energy amount and recovery rate is just too good! The only downside is I might get bored from cultivating for 6 months straight. My mind might get bored, but I have a couple of years to practice discipline and make sure I have a firm enough grasp over myself to not get bored.
The rank 5 version of this, sadly, doesn't exist! My system has knowledge of all Gus' and the next evolution is body talent nourishing Gu. This is quite a big letdown, as the rank 5's effect is inferior to a rank 2 talent Gu. It increases a persons talent by 5% for each major breakthrough. This sounds good, but I am buying the Fate Flipped Upside Down Gu, so I don't want such an useless Gu worm. I'd rather keep my perpetual motion self, thank you very much!
Well, at least I know what I'll be doing for the nearest future! Buying a body nourishing Gu for 6 Gu points, then a stone aperture Gu for 150 points and, lastly, Fate Flipped Upside Down Gu for 500 points! See you guys later when I gwow up and stop being a bwig bwebwe.
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Glam rock for life!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
livin' the Glam life!
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