《Sir Skelliton》Technical Difficulties
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It had been some time since The God of Coding was as angered as they had been. The few who had ever truly pushed past their façade of frivolity they wore, of which all could be counted on one hand, would agree that they found a being not too different from a machine. Single-minded, calculation, and void of the chaotic sensibilities all sentient creatures were burdened with. So, it could have been considered an achievement that a mindless Minion Skeleton had managed to pull such an outburst out of the god.
Having distressed and allowing his Acolytes time to rest, something their unconscious bodies didn’t quite register, the God seemingly recovered. Being a workaholic, the God used work to relax. Not the easiest job but they found performing their divine task fulfilling. Eventually, they all but had forgotten about one measly skeleton. As much as a near-omniscient deity can, at least.
Mortals, at their most heretical, had rarely roused their emotions. Even the rise and fall of Gods and Godlike beings due to their machinations left little if any presence in their mind. Simply put, the Skeleton was a one in a trillion experience for the God. Something that they would prefer to keep unique and unrepeated.
Shame fate didn’t give a damn.
The God was currently being assaulted by numerous error messages, the System slowing down, rubber banding, and entirely crashing in numerous places. Working immediately, the God went through the proper procedure whenever such a rare occurrence took place. Isolate the error so it doesn’t spread like a virus. Fix the minor issues so they don’t crash anything else. Find the place of origin and solve the problem.
He wasn’t happy to find the same undead coming back to bite him. Especially when he saw the mess it made.
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“How!? How do you not only glitch yourself, your master, and the monster but someone else entirely!?”
Currently, the Legacy Skeleton was being mentally possessed by a Mind Thief. A simple process, wherein the Mind Thief and the potential host commence a mental battle for dominance. If the host loses, the Mind Thief psionically posses them. Easy.
The problem here was both parties were functioning under different rules. The struggle was based on either creature's Intelligence stat. The Skeleton had none because most Legacy Undead were brainless necromantic constructs. This gave the Mind Thief an automatic win. But the Legacy Skeleton couldn’t be possessed because there was nothing inside to control.
This forced a perpetual loop where the Mind Thief was kicked out, registered it had succeeded its possession, and try to force itself back in. And then the System tried to fix the issue by trying to upgrade the Undead. There is no possession loop if the host isn’t just a mindless Skeleton. Something that is denied because it is a Minion.
Minions are static creatures that cannot increase in power outside of equipment boosts. But this also brings up another issue that the Master is far too low level to have a Minion of this power level. So the System tries to delete the connection between the Minion and the Master. Which the System can’t do since the God of Coding had hot fixed the connection earlier.
So now there were three loops instead of just one. The possession loop, the Skeleton being upgraded and denied, and the Minions connection being deleted and reestablished. The worst part was the fact there was a Gnome standing right next to ground zero. Such an extreme death loop in coding was rearranging their System. They were currently glitching out as their Stats, Race, and Class was being randomized. Repeatedly.
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“Ok, I need my rubber ducky!”
A mystical portal opened next to the God. Reaching in, the God of Coding pulled out his most powerful Artifact. A Golden Duck covered in mystical runes and glowing. They then began to talk to the duck, venting and bouncing off ideas.
The Golden Duck just quacked occasionally.
“...what if I just delete them?”
Quack.
“No, no, your right. That’d have a domino effect and the other God’s would get uppity.”
Quack
“What? No! Besides, I can’t cover up an entire under town being erased.”
Quack
“That just switches one problem for another.”
Quack
“I am not asking them for help, especially after the chicken incident.”
Quack
“What?”
Quack
“No, I heard what you said I just don’t-“
Quack.
“Well no, other than a full reset I can’t think of anything else.”
Quack
“They’re already this big of a mess, that just might make things worse!”
Quack
“...Yeah. Yeah. I got nothing.”
Quack.
“Alright. Just remember.”
The God of Coding did what every deity did when they came across an incredibly illogical creature. They booted them from the confines of the rigid System and let them make their own choices. Occasionally, these types of individuals would become world shakers, shifting the standards of the world irrevocably. Nine times out of ten? They killed themselves out of sheer stupidity.
The System had decided to give these types of individuals rather ironic names.
Skeleton#3176-5B/` 9 q9=6;,] U A+*M$[-16 has been upgraded from Commoner (Minion) System Access to Hero (Minion) System Access.
“This was your idea.”
The Golden Duck, in its infinite wisdom, only quacked.
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