Yuri led me to his room. Which was a bit surprising. I’m not sure why… As kids, we were always running up and down the hallway from his room to mine. But that was eleven years ago.

Unlike my room, his changed a lot. His lacrosse stick was gone, just like the band posters, actually, there wasn’t much of anything in here. It looked barren almost like a hotel room. His books were gone, his action figures disappeared as well. As I looked at his desk I felt a deep sting in my chest. There were a few family photos on it, even photos with Scott and other youngsters. But I wasn’t there. Not on a single one. He got rid of them all. That hurt, bad. But I made no comment, just watched him rummage through his closet.

“These are a bit old, but they should fit you.” He handed me a pair of older but well-kept black suit pants. He would obviously have no chance at pulling them over his muscular thighs but I was a bit smaller, so they suited me just fine. “I think I might be able to find a suit jacket for you too,” he offered.

“No, it’s fine, thanks. I’ll just take my shirt,” I assured him and made for the door. Before I could even touch the doorknob though he grabbed my shoulder and turned me around.

“The pack wasn’t exactly keen on any reminders of you back when you left,” he said quietly. “Dad made me get rid of them, but I kept a few in the shoebox in my closet.”

I told myself it didn’t really matter, yet I felt my shoulders relax and a warm feeling replaced the hurt in my chest. So he didn’t forget about me after all…

By the time I put on my shirt and made an attempt at taming my hair and shaving the stubble on my face I could already hear people walking and talking downstairs. The whole pack would come. The whole pack… I wasn’t sure if I was ready for that. But it was only rarely that life waited for people to be ready.

I mustered up all the courage I had and left my room. I was immensely grateful to Yuri, Scott, and Lowell when I found them waiting for me on top of the stairs. Together we went downstairs.

Damn. When I left, the pack used to have thirty members, now I heard as many as forty heartbeats mingling down here. I swallowed hard.

Now came the awkward and quite boring part of the evening where I would stand in the corner all alone while everyone talked and drank together. I really doubted there was a single person who wanted to talk to me.

I got myself a drink while people stopped Lowell and Yuri to talk to them. Whisky, what a wonderful drink to drown my grief in. My wolf felt anxious as people stared at me, the clear hostility in their eyes made me shudder. At least they cleared my way as I walked so I didn’t have to bump into or squeeze past anyone.

In the living room, there was a big table in front of the fireplace covered in black cloth with a bunch of flowers and candles on it. In the middle, there was a big framed photo of Bran. For a second it made me catch my breath. It has been so long since I’ve seen him… And now I would never see him in person again. The body was too mutilated to be shown here. I clenched my jaw against the deep rage and grief that threatened to swallow me. Don’t worry Bran, I will find your killer and I will make them suffer. I promised him silently.

A hand fell on my shoulder. “I’m sure he will watch over us all just like he did when he was alive,” Holly said and rested her head on my shoulder. Yuri’s mother was always kind to me and while even Nikolai looked at me with disgust a decade ago, she never did, she actually objected to throwing me out of the pack. Perhaps it was because she used to be a good friend of my mother.

“You know, Bran’s and Alistair’s relationship was never the same after you left… I think Bran always tried to persuade Alistair to take you back. I just thought you should know that.” She squeezed my arm and kissed me on the cheek before she went to tend to others.

Damn it. I quickly rubbed my eyes to hide the unshed tears and settled myself in an armchair in the corner. Bran was always able to talk some sense into Father, but the truth was that even if Father really invited me back here, I wasn’t sure if I would’ve accepted. My pride was hurt, I felt ashamed and angry, combined with my stubbornness I would’ve probably thoroughly enjoyed giving him the finger.

Still… If Bran really did think about me while I was away, why did he never bother to call? A few times he told Lowell to say hi to me but other than that, nothing.

“Would you look at that...” An armchair scraped on the floor and then suddenly there was Elliot sitting by my side. He was a tall and lean man with dark brown hair and ice-blue eyes. “So the black sheep of the family comes back to wreak havoc, eh?”

I stared at him a bit dumbfounded. After the walk with Father, I have decided to not talk with Elliot here. Not because Father told me to let it be, but because this was time to grief for Bran, not start a war. Yet here he was talking to me.

“I didn’t come to ‘wreak havoc’,” I said when I recovered from my surprise. “I came to say goodbye to Bran.”

“Of course, of course.” He nodded looking at Bran’s photo. “But if you are anything like the rambunctious kid I remember you to be then I’m sure your visit will be one the pack won’t easily forget.” He smiled knowingly as if he was in on a joke I couldn’t understand.

Actually, I heard you were the one wreaking havoc in the city, I wanted to say. But the pack, oh the pack, people were glancing our way, whispering quietly and frowning at me. They were listening and they weren’t happy I was talking to the alpha of a rival pack.

“I seem to possess a talent for trouble.” I sighed, resigning myself to a useless neutral conversation.

“Well the fact you are still alive means you are strong enough to get yourself out of those troubles, which is something I respect,” he said, sipping his whisky almost mindlessly. For the second time though I found myself staring at him in surprise and confusion. Did he just say he respected me? I must’ve heard wrong.

Before I could ask him to repeat what he just said, Father appeared, making his way straight to us. “Elliot, here you are.”

“Alistair, what a horrible thing to lose a Beta and especially one as amazing as our dear friend Bran, my condolences,” Elliot said, actually sounding sad, and went to give Father a manly hug and pat on the back.

Father in the meantime made sure to pin me with his cold look. It made me curl in on myself as if I really did do something wrong, but it was Elliot who came to talk to me, not the other way around. “A horrible thing indeed, thank you for coming to say goodbye to him with us,” Father said and they raised their glasses together in a silent cheer for Bran. “Please come join me, and my closest in the kitchen,” Alistair said and without waiting for an actual answer led the other alpha away.

I tried not to take the fact I wasn’t invited to the kitchen as one of ‘the closest’ personally. I couldn’t care less. I couldn’t… I rubbed my chest and willed the little pangs of disappointment away. I left my glass of whisky on the little coffee table and made my way outside to get some fresh air.