“…This house is a wreck,” Pitch said.

“I know it…” Azor replied.

It was a dark and stormy winter’s night, and ice-cold rain poured all over the estate…and inside of it, unfortunately.

Any container that could possibly hold water was set out on the floor somewhere in the mansion, to catch the raindrops leaking in through the ceiling. By itself, the room with the piano— which they had both chosen as their favorite— contained four vases, an old washbasin, two pitchers, and a mason jar on the piano bench.

Pitch and Azor were curled up close together in an armchair, in one of the only dry corners of the room. She shivered, and buried her arms deeper into his coat.

“I could stand the holes in the roof— among other problems— if it weren’t so drafty besides,” she said. “Even if you light a fire, it can’t compete with all the cold air seeping through the walls. And it’s not even midwinter yet…if this keeps on, I’ll end up with pneumonia…”

“Then I will keep you warm,” Azor said, wrapping his arm around her shoulder.

Pitch smiled. “…Unfortunately, that is not an ideal solution,” she replied. “I can’t just stick to you like glue all winter long.”

“And why not?”

“Because…one can have too much of a good thing.”

She yawned. “…Tell me what it’s like here in the summer,” she murmured. “So I’ll have something to look forward to.”

“Well…there are many bright days,” Azor began. “The roses are very lively, and they require attention, and lots of water…and it’s warm in the afternoons. Very warm…and unlike in winter, there is little I can do to alleviate that. So I spend a lot of time underground, in the cellar. Or in the well, if it comes to that…when the heat reaches its peak in midsummer, sometimes I sleep just to escape—”

“So, in short, you don’t like the summer.”

“…It does have its challenges, yes.”

She squeezed him gently. “Poor Azor…so strong, and yet so sensitive…but don’t worry; this next summer will be better.”

“Because you’re here with me?”

“Yes~. But besides that, I’m going to help you. I could fan you while you work in the garden…and when you sleep, I’ll put you in a bucket, and cover you with lots of cool water.”

“…I would rather not be placed in a bucket again.”

“Alright, then; a jar— ah, I suppose you wouldn’t like that either…”

“No...”

“Well, I’ll find something to put you in.”

Thunder rumbled in the distance. Pitch closed her eyes and sighed. “You know…it’s still difficult for me to believe that this is real,” she said. “Every other time I’ve been alone with you, and peaceful and happy…it always ended up being some kind of dream.”

“Like the ‘fancy ball’ that ended in disaster…?”

“Yes, there was that…and another one recently. The dream I had after drinking that poisoned tea…”

“It was like an alternate future, with everything I could have wanted…or rather, everything I might have thought I wanted, once,” she explained, smiling slightly. “We were living blissfully in that castle on the mountain…my stepmother was long dead, so I was the lady of the house…and you had somehow regained your humanity in order to marry me. Can you imagine that??”

Azor’s false eyes flickered. “…Did you…like me, as a human?” he asked after a moment.

Pitch looked up at him. “Well, I…of course I liked you. Human or otherwise, you’re still you,” she replied. “But to be honest, I prefer you this way, because I know you prefer yourself this way. Powerful, and unfathomable…and still so adorable…”

She kissed his shadowy face. “…To be honest, I should have known right from then that I was trapped in a dream,” she continued. “Because in real life, I would never have let you do that to yourself for me. And I can’t even imagine asking you to live somewhere without your roses—”

“Wait, what happened to my roses??”

“Well…they just weren’t there. The palace garden didn’t have any…and you hardly seemed to care; I suppose that should have tipped me off as well…”

“I should say so…! How could you even conceive of such a ridiculous version of me?! Why it’s, it’s…sacrilegious!!”

“I suppose that’s one way to put it…”

“And how dare you fall in love with him!!”

“…Alright, now I think you’re being a bit unreasonable.”

“There is nothing unreasonable about it! Even in reality, I would consider it the height of disrespect for you to leave me and marry some fool with no appreciation for nature’s most perfect creations!!”

“Even if he were otherwise exactly like you…?”

“Especially if he were otherwise exactly like me!!”

Azor’s furious ranting continued for some time…but Pitch didn’t mind. Especially since it caused his body to become noticeably warmer.

She yawned again and settled in, perfectly content.