Chen Feiyan VIII

the Monastery, Heguri Empire

the Death of Hubris

The full moon lit the frozen rice paddies even in the dark. Fei brushed her foot against the ice below her. There was no grip against the rough ice and earth. Bunches of long since harvested rice stalks stood stiff against the winter winds. Fei crouched and brushed her hand against the cold stalks. It had only been months since she harvested this paddy with Frog, Hare, and the rest of the farmers. She stood up now and watched the dark empty space around her on the monastery farms on the mountain’s edge. Somewhere out there, Mushroom stalked.

It was very late. The two already sparred in the secluded courtyard earlier that night under Badger’s supervision. Fei told Badger her stomach hurt and that she wanted to sleep alone that night. She was running out of excuses for why she wasn’t sleeping at Badger’s every night. Fei listened to the whistling of the wind. Barren branches from the twisted pines creaked and snapped. It was very cold, and Fei’s shoes were damp from the light snow cover and were beginning to freeze. She wiggled her toes to make sure she could feel them. Fei wanted to run her cold hands under the hot spring water in Badger’s quarters and climb into the narrow straw mattress with her. She wanted to feel the rise and fall of her chest and hear her light snore.

Footsteps?

Fei snapped around but could not see anyone, or anything, approaching from behind her in the dark. Fei and Mushroom had not come across a shadow during their sparring sessions outside the walls. There hadn’t been a sighting at all since the winter winds began to blow on the mountain. Badger told Fei as much herself. The memory of the red eyes in the dark that once haunted Fei at night faded from her mind.

Fei slowly turned in a circle, staring out into the moonlit mountainside.

Where are you?

The ice would crunch under Mushroom’s feet, she knew, and so would the frozen stalks of rice. Fei was standing in the middle of the frozen rice paddy for that reason. From here, it would be hard for Mushroom to catch her by surprise. Mushroom would glide some distance through the air quietly, but not as far as Fei currently sat waiting in the dark.

Fei heard another crunch and whipped her head back towards the monastery. The noise came from between her position and the walls. Fei strained her eyes to make out movement in the dark.

Nothing.

Fei heard the rush of silk in the wind and turned just in time to see Mushroom closing on her. The moon lit her light blue silks, giving her away against the dark backdrop of ice and earth and night. Mushroom landed her glide within ten meters of Fei and rushed towards her.

You’ve given me too much notice; you’ve wasted your surprise.

Fei knew it would take another minute or more before Mushroom had enough energy to glide again after a jump that long. Normally she would flash Fei with blinding light to disarm her, but they had a rule against it outside the walls. It would be too easy for the priests on the ramparts to see them if they summoned light.

Instead of waiting for Mushroom’s attack, Fei ran towards her. She took a few steps before lifting off the ground to glide through the air towards Mushroom feet first. Fei watched Mushroom buckle for an instant before continuing her run at Fei; she wasn’t used to Fei being on the front foot.

The hesitation was enough. Mushroom didn’t set her footing. She avoided some of the impact, but the collision was still violent enough to knock her to the ground. Fei jumped on her and grabbed her by the silks’ collar before landing a blow against Mushroom’s chin. Fei felt a jolt in the stomach as Mushroom kicked her off onto her back; she was back on the defensive. Before Fei could jump to her feet, Mushroom was on her. She twisted one of Fei’s arms behind her back and slammed her face into the frozen ground. Fei tasted blood in her mouth and felt a sharp pain in her nose and mouth. She struggled to break from Mushroom’s grasp. Slowly she fought her way back onto her back so she could see Mushroom. Fei spat in Mushroom’s face in a desperate attempt to throw her off, and Mushroom flashed her in the eyes with light, blinding her.

“Bitch!”

Mushroom laughed.

“We said no light! We said no light!”

“Couldn’t help myself.”

“Get off me.”

Fei felt Mushroom’s weight shift, and her grip on her wrists loosened. Fei threw Mushroom off and stood up. Everything was dark; she couldn’t see. Fei struggled to find balance on the icy footing without her vision.

“What if one of those things comes right now. I can’t see anything.”

“I’ll take care of it, don’t worry.”

Fei shook her head, annoyed at Mushroom’s overconfidence. She imagined Badger chastising her on the subject.

You were right; I know, I know.

“What if they saw you. What if they saw the flash.”

“Settle down, Fei; you spook like a horse. They didn’t see anything.”

“How do you know?”

“I know.”

Fei exhaled deeply and touched her nose. It hurt, but not so bad as other times where Mushroom broke it. She spat out blood onto the ice below her feet. Her eyesight was slowly returning, but she still could not see much.

“That was cheap.”

Mushroom laughed again, “It was.”

“You asked me to help you out here. I don’t have to help, you know.”

“Oh, you don’t want to?”

It was true, Fei knew. Fighting Mushroom outside the walls gave her even more joy than taking a hot spring bath or laying with Badger in their bed.

“I’m sorry, Moth, that was cheap.”

Fei could still hear the banter in her voice and turned to the sound of her. She could make out Mushroom’s figure now. She held out her arm.

“Let’s go. That’s enough for tonight. Guide me back? I still can’t see much.”

“Of course.”

Fei felt Mushroom take her arm. She let her lead and focused on her footing. The earth underneath them was uneven and slick.

“Still have the key?”

“Don’t worry.”

“Do you have it?”

“I left it hidden back near the wall. It’s in a safe place.”

Fei shook her head. She planned well and caught Mushroom off guard, and she still lost. If Fei were dishonest with herself, she’d complain that Mushroom flashed her with light, and that’s why she lost. But she knew Mushroom had already beaten her by then.

If you’re resorting to spitting into your opponent’s face, you don’t have many more options left.

By the time Fei and Mushroom made it back inside the walls, light snowfall began. Visibility in the main courtyard was low, with the flurries blanketing the open air. Snow dusted the ancient maple trees that lined the courtyard. From their position on the ground, Fei watched the moving oil lamps on the walls. Even now, a cold winter night, the priests watched for shadows.

After Mushroom and Fei said goodnight, Fei paused for a moment. She began to head towards her room, but the thought of Badger’s warm bed lingered. Instead, she found herself walking towards Badger’s quarters. By the time she arrived, snowfall had blanketed the courtyard with fresh snow. Badger’s thick pine door was cold and locked. Fei knocked loud enough to wake Badger but quietly enough to keep out of earshot of anyone else. There was no response after the first few tries, but eventually, Fei heard the creak of the matters and a shuffling of feet from the other side of the door. Badger’s face looked tired and confused.

“Moth? What are you doing out in the cold, it’s late.”

“Can I come in?”

“Of course.”

There was an oil lamp lit already by the time Badger closed the door behind her and Fei. Fei walked over to the hot spring water and ran her frozen fingers under the hot water. The smell filled her nostrils, and her hands burned in the heat. She was used to the smell by now; it no longer bothered her.

Fei filled her hands with the hot water and splashed it across her face. She knew there might be crusted blood around her nose and mouth and wanted to get rid of it before Badger took a close look at her.

“What are you doing up so late?”

“I couldn’t sleep.”

Badger walked over and grabbed her shoulders. She rubbed them with her large hands.

“You’re freezing. How’s your stomach?”

“Feeling better.”

“Did the tea help?”

“It did.”

“I’m glad.”

Fei had not drunk the tea Badger made for her stomach.

Badger turned Fei around now and pulled her into her chest. Fei felt like she melted into the warm embrace. They stood there for a long while quietly until Fei stood on her toes to kiss Badger.

“Come on, let’s sleep. I’m tired.”

Fei undressed and slipped under the thick wool blanket, the straw mattress was still warm, and the heat from Badger’s body warmed her even more. Fei felt her fingers and toes begin to tingle; the feeling was returning to them. For a moment, Fei felt guilty about lying to Badger, but the thought receded. Fei was tired, and she drifted off into a deep sleep.

Fei and Mushroom continued to train at night. Despite the weather, the two managed to be productive in relative safety outside the walls. Fei even bested Mushroom on two occasions. The first was using a similar tactic to the previous night. She sat in an advantageous position in the rice paddies and waited for Mushroom to make her first move. Again, Mushroom used her glide to get close to Fei without her hearing until the last ten or twenty meters. Fei countered on the front foot again and pinned Mushroom once they entered hand-to-hand combat.

After having relative success twice by attacking from the front foot, Fei grew confident. Instead of waiting for Mushroom, Fei began to stalk her in the dark. For her second victory, Fei spotted Mushroom crouching along a rice paddy field before Mushroom spotted her in return. Fei used some of her gliding stamina to weightlessly scamper up the closest twisted pine in the direction of Muhroom’s movement. Once Mushroom passed under the pine, Fei attacked her from the rear. She landed two blows to the back of Mushroom’s head before Mushroom could counter, and the session was over quickly.

With the two victories came many defeats. Mushroom was still far enough ahead of Fei to counter most of her attacks and often spotted Fei first. The longer the hand-to-hand combat went, the better the chance for the more experienced fighter. Mushroom dodged, weaved, and parried blows for the first few minutes before going on the offensive once Fei began to tire.

After the first night returning to Badger’s quarters after the sessions outside the wall, Fei returned repeatedly. She stopped giving Badger an excuse for why she would disappear after training and stopped washing the crusted blood from her knuckles, knees, and nose. For her part, Badger stopped asking questions. Badger always opened the door and had the bed warm and ready for Fei whatever the hour. Fei wandered in with frozen hands, feet, and dirtied clothes.

Does she want to know? Has she given up trying to stop me?

What once felt like deceit felt more honest now. There seemed to be an unspoken agreement between Badger and Fei. Fei felt that the less Badger knew, the better. It would protect her against should Spider catch Mushroom and Fei outside the walls.

We won’t get caught. I’ve never been caught.

Fei was the happiest she’d been since she was a little girl. It was the closest feeling she’d had to freedom since running out into the fields at night with her little sister, Meifang. The only thing missing was a view of the stars. The weather up high on the mountain was cruel and relentless in the winter. Cold winds never ceased and brought with them rain, ice, and mixtures of the two. On the worst days, Fei and the cleaners couldn’t keep the courtyard clear for more than an hour or two before fresh snow or ice began to cover it once again. The ancient maples, now barren, stood stout through it all.

Fei’s mind often wandered while clearing the courtyard. She would replay the training sessions with Mushroom from the previous night in her mind, both the official sessions inside the small enclosure and the unauthorized trips outside the wall. Fei looked for weaknesses or patterns in Mushroom’s movements or devised strategies to counter her in hand-to-hand combat. It was thrilling. When Fei’s mind started racing, hours of cleaning snow and debris passed without noticing. Fei realized how torn up and cold her palms and fingers were from work after her shifts.

Fei also thought about the tower. She had not dared venture back into the building for the third time but knew she would need to soon. Her gliding had improved dramatically. Her stamina had improved, and she knew how to use the power for short bursts in the middle of hand-to-hand combat or long glides through the air. It all came so easy to her; she felt herself a natural. It was a waste not to see what the tower offered on the third level.

And Mushroom can come, too. She hasn’t been allowed down to the third level yet, but I’m sure she won’t let me get ahead of her.

Fei sat in silence, perched atop a gnarled pine. The wind blew flurries of snow across the moonlit mountainside. Fei could not see down to the ground very far. She listened carefully for sounds of movement below, but it was useless. The weather on the night was particularly dreadful. Strong winds and thick snowfall made seeing, listening, and moving difficult much less gliding. Clouds and mist hid the moon, leaving visibility low.

We should go back inside; this is useless.

At the end of their last bout, Fei had asked Mushroom to cancel the rest of the session.

“We’re here to work on combining the gliding with the arts. We can’t do that in this storm.”

Mushroom had simply laughed and retreated into the dark for the next round.

“Are you that scared of losing again?”

This is silly.

Fei listened in the dark, but the winds were too loud. Her mind wandered to Badger’s quarters again. The warm straw mattress and the thick wool blanket called to her. She wanted to run her hands and feet under the hot spring water. She wanted to curl up to Badger’s large frame and get some much-needed sleep.

Fei spotted something out of the corner of her eye.

A flash of light? Mushroom?

Fei strained her eyes, and sure enough, she spotted a flash through the storm in the distance. Then another. Fei heard the muffled scream that came next and jumped down from the pine. She landed in thick snowfall near the base of the three and ran through the darkness. The snow was up to her calves in places, and the ice under it all was slick and uneven.

“Mushroom? Iko!”

Fei called into the empty night. Another flash answered her call in the distance. It was maybe fifty meters. Then another. Then a thick stream of constant light.

“Iko!”

Fei ran as quickly as she could. Her footing betrayed her as she slipped and fell through the snowfall. Frozen stalks of one harvest rice crunched underfoot. Fei gave up and took to the air. The wind blew her glide off her course, headed for the beam of light, but she covered more ground quickly. Once she was within twenty meters, she landed. The beam of light disappeared in the dark. Fei ran again on foot.

“Iko!”

“Fei!”

“Iko! Are you alright!”

Mushroom’s figure began to come through the dark windswept night. Her blue silks flapped and snapped in the wind, and Iko’s long dark hair flew wildly in the storm. A small ball of light danced in front of her in the snow.

“I killed it! I saw its eyes through the storm and crept up on it! The training worked, Fei! It worked!”

Fei’s eyes widened. At Mushroom’s feet was a large mass of dark matter. Slowly it disappeared into the air, in a cloud of black smoke before disappearing entirely.

“Was that… was that…”

“The creature! I killed it!”

Fei was speechless. They stood silent for a moment before Fei rushed to Mushroom and hugged her.

“That’s amazing!”

“Can you believe it?”

“Iko, you did it!”

Mushroom pulled back slightly and held Fei’s shoulders in a tight squeeze. She looked her in the eyes.

“We did it, Fei, we did.”

Fei wanted to laugh, “Oh, please spare me. I had nothing to do with it.”

“I saw it first; I stalked it and attacked it. It’s just like we’ve been training!”

Fei heard the noise, and she knew Mushroom did too. They both snap turned. There was nothing but wind and snowfall in the dark behind them. And yet, they head the scratching of the ice, the tearing of the frozen rice stalks.

“They weren’t supposed to come in the winter,” Fei said.

“Right.”

“And there’s never more than one, right.”

“No.”

Fei noticed the lack of confidence in Iko’s voice.

“Did you—”

“I heard it.”

Fei and Iko starred into the abyss of the mountainside, their backs to the monastery. They were very far from the safety of the walls. As Fei looked out into the darkness, a pair of red eyes began to emerge. Then another, and then a third.

“Let’s go.”

Iko was already moving. Fei ran. The snowfall was only piling higher, and the women struggled to move quickly.

“Can you glide?”

“I used it getting over here!”

“I used mine fighting the first one!”

Wind swept across the mountainside, and visibility was low. It was hard enough to hear Iko running beside her. Fei took a quick look behind as they ran; the eyes were right behind them. The snow crunched under their feet as they ran.

“They’re getting close! They’re moving faster than we are!”

Fei watched Iko steal a glance behind them to confirm.

“Can you beam them?”

“I can!”

Fei hadn’t used the light at all that night; she had plenty left. Iko drew a blade from her silks as they ran.

“When I count to three, you go! Beam them!”

“There are three!”

“We don’t have a choice!”

“I don’t have a weapon!”

“Just beam them! I’ll take care of them!”

Before Fei had a chance to argue any further, Iko was counting.

“One!”

Fei started small balls of light in both her palms.

“Two!”

She focused on the task; there was no use in worrying. She needed to do this.

“Three!”

Fei turned and opened both palms to the oncoming shadows. Beams of light shot forward, and the lit creatures took shape in the dark. They were as horrible as Fei remembered them in her mind. Their bodies shifted like smoke and yet held sturdy on the ground. Large black teeth sat in gaping mouths and the eyes; the eyes were bright red and unnatural. Fei’s light kept them at bay; they reared and cried. Fei felt Iko rush past her, her long hair trailing her in the wind. Before Fei could focus on her, Iko was bounding up one of the shadows’ long arms and planted her blade in its heart. Dark smoke burst from where her blade penetrated the demon, and the creature fell to the ground with Iko riding it to the earth.

Iko now defended herself against the flailing arms of the other two shadows. Fei focused the beams of light on their eyes, effectively blinding them. But they knew Iko was there, and they jerked and swung their long limbs. Iko dodged one arm, then another, before darting inside the reach of the shadow on the right. With what energy Iko had left, she lifted gracefully off the ground and floated up to the creature’s neck, burying her blade deep into whatever tissue hid beneath the smoke. More smoke spewed from the wound and the second creature fell.

Fei started to feel the light waning. She combined both beams into one and targeted the last shadow. The creature hissed and cried and flailed. Iko scrambled to regain her footing below and held her blade in front of her in a defensive stance.

“How much more light Fei!”

“I’m almost out!”

“Hold on!”

Iko charged the last shadow; this time, Fei knew she couldn’t glide. The shadow, still blinded by the light, swung a massive arm across its body, and Iko tumbled over it. She landed on her feet and pushed back off. Her right foot slipped on the icy footing. Fei watched her fall while her beam of light slowly decreased in power. Fei struggled to hold out. The creature swung again but missed Iko, who scrambled to try to get off the ice. Iko didn’t dodge the final swing of a massive arm. The creature struck her, and her body flew across the ice.

“Iko!”

Fei’s light sputtered, and sparks flew out from her hands instead of light. Her stomach lurched, and she vomited across the snow. The vomit melted through to the dirt below. Fei fell to her arms. She watched the creature regain itself and turn towards Fei. The wind howled, and the pines creaked in the wind. Fei looked at Iko’s limp body in the snow to her right. Blood was pooling around her, melting the top layer of the snow cover.

Is she alive?

Fei had no time to think. She glanced over her shoulder; she was still too far from the safety of the walls. The shadow closed on her now. She ran for Iko’s blade that lay strewn by her side. The steel shimmered somehow amongst the wind and the snow and wind he clouds. Thick dark blood covered the edge of the blade. Fei wheeled back towards the oncoming shadow; it was close now. She watched its arms move. They were massive and dragged low to the ground.

Find the opening; there’s always an opening.

The creature swung its right arm, and Fei jumped in towards its belly. She drove the steel blade up towards the sky and felt it bury into the trunk of the creature. The resistance was tough, but the edge was sharp and found its way deep into the shadow. The demon cried and stepped back. Fei used the rest of her energy to float through the air outside its reach. She watched it fall and disappear into the air.

Fei called for help on the way back to the walls. She screamed into the storm, knowing her voice wouldn’t travel far. It took almost a half-hour to drag Iko’s body back to the side gate that led back inside the monastery. Fei held the blade in her left hand the whole time, hoping another shadow would not follow.

By the time Fei reached Iko’s body after finishing the third shadow, she was already gone. There was no saying goodbye to her friend. She could not collect any last words. Iko’s back looked broken and misshapen. Blood spilled from an open wound on her side. Broken pieces of rib bone protruded out of her, and her body was cold. Fei brushed her hair to the side, revealing her face. She was still beautiful, but the look on her face was fear. Fei closed her eyelids like she remembered her father did to her grandmother as a child and whispered goodbye.

She didn’t remember which priest reached her first when she made it back to the gate. It was all a blur. Fei looked around for Badger, but she was nowhere to be seen. Questions came flying that she could not or did not want to answer, and eventually, the group of priests agreed to take her to Spider. They pried her off Iko’s body as she sat weeping, holding her, and marched her to the tower.

Fei padded down the hall with the priests trailing behind her. One of the priests had taken the blade from her, leaving her with nothing but her frozen blood-stained clothes. Fei glanced towards the staircase when they reached the tower’s opening, but they marched her past the stairs and towards Spiders quarters.

If we had just gone down to the third level. Maybe if we had whatever is there, she would be alive.

When they opened the door, Spider sat in meditation. The room was how Fei remembered it from her first visit in the summer. Spider sat on a bamboo mat floor. Stacks of books sat piled neatly around the room. Oil lamps lit the space in the four corners; walls held Heguri calligraphy. Fei realized she could read them now but kept her focus on the older woman in the middle of the room. She sat with impeccable posture, and her light blue silks fell neatly on her.

Spider opened her eyes; they locked on Fei.

“Why have you brought her here. She’s afraid. What have you done, child?”

Fei went to speak, but nothing came. A priest prodded her in the back, but Spider held up a hand.

“Let her speak.”

“We… we went outside the walls.”

“Something tells me there’s more to the story than that, little Moth.”

“We saw a creature. We saw three of them. Well, four. We killed three before they...”

Spider squinted her eyes. She sat silently.

“Before the last one killed Mushroom.”

The room was silent. Spider watched her. Fei felt as if she was reading her mind.

“Is there anything else you’d like to tell me, little Moth?”

How much do I tell her? How much does she already know?

“And remember, child, before you speak, you don’t know what I know.”

Whatever web the Spider spun, it was invisible, and Fei knew she was in it.

“We go out there to train at night.”

“We?”

“Mushroom and I.”

“The two of you train with Badger in the courtyard already, do you not?”

“We do.”

“And Badger’s training is not sufficient?”

Fei fell silent and looked to the floor. She couldn’t bring herself to say anymore.

“A yes, or no, would suffice. Is Badger’s training sufficient?”

The sound of footsteps came from the hallway behind her. Fei didn’t dare turn her attention while speaking to Spider. She knew the loud voice.

“What is this?”

Badger?

“Just the person we needed. Your protege here was about to answer a question for me. Apparently, she’s been sparring outside the walls at night with Mushroom. Mushroom died tonight. Shadows; four of them.”

“What?”

“Mushroom died.”

“Four of them? In the Winter?”

“Unless our little Moth here is lying to us.”

More silence. Fei didn’t know what to say. She wanted to turn around and hug Badger and tell her she was sorry.

“It was me.”

Fei turned to Badger now.

“What? Badger, stop.”

“Let her speak, Moth.”

“I ordered them to train outside the courtyard.”

“Are you sure this is how you want this to go, Badger?” Spider asked.

“I brought our little Moth to the tower. I taught the girl the light and the air.”

One of the other priests standing behind Fei gasped, but Spider sat unmoved. Her face did not betray what she thought.

“Badger, please—”

“Quiet Moth,” Spider cut her off, “You had your turn to speak, and you did not. Continue, Badger.”

“She was too far behind in her training. She was weak. She didn’t know any of the arts. I needed her to learn more.”

“And so you took her to our tower and taught her our secrets.”

“Yes.”

“You had no right.”

“I know.”

“And why were they outside the walls?”

“They were outside the walls at night to perfect the air. If Fei jumped in the courtyard, everyone could see.”

“I see. And you weren’t concerned about the shadows?”

“They don’t come in the winter.”

“Badger, you’ve been telling me about how concerned you are about them for months.”

“They don’t come in the winter.”

“Until now?”

“Until now.”

“You’ve never stepped out of line your whole time here, Badger. I’m finding this all hard to believe. Why should I believe this? Any of this.”

“It’s… the girl. Moth. I love her.”

The room fell silent again. Spider’s face was still unmoved. Fei’s heart raced.

Please, Badger, don’t do this.

“Go on, Badger.”

“I love her. I broke the rules for her. Not out of any disrespect for you, or this monastery, or our work.”

“And yet by breaking the rules, you disrespect it all.”

“I understand.”

“You know I can’t allow this to go unpunished: you’ve stolen our secrets and given these girls an order that resulted in a death. All in the name of unnatural love.”

“It is not unnatural.”

“Badger, let me ask you another question. Do you consider yourself a predator? Are you a predator?”

“Excuse me?”

“Our little Fei is young and impressionable. You’ve given her great things: the light, the air, you’ve taught her the arts. Are you taking advantage of your position to fulfill your unnatural desires for a woman’s flesh?”

Fei jumped at Spider using the air. She was up and moving in a flash before any of the priests could move. Spider didn’t flinch; she knocked Fei out of the air with a flick of the wrist, and Fei tumbled against the hard stone floor. She felt her wrist snap. Pain shot through her body. She cried out, but there was nothing she or Badger could do. They were outnumbered.

“Leave her. She’ll live. Now, we were on the subject of your predation, Badger. It sounds like we might fundamentally disagree on that point. And in truth, it’s not that important. Bobtail—”

“Yes.”

“Take Badger to the dungeons.”

“And the girl?”

“Take her to the infirmary to see to her injury. When she’s rested, bring her to me. She was nothing but a pawn in Badger’s twisted fantasy.”

“Yes, Spider.”

“Poor girl. To escape the talons of Governor Guo, just to find another monster here on the mountain.”

Fei could only whisper; she had no strength left, “She’s not a monster.”

“And Bobtail, please have someone bring Beetle and Rat to me. I will need a permanent replacement for Badger.”

“Spider, please,” Badger begged.

“I asked you if you were sure this was how you wanted this to go, Badger. I gave you a chance. You did not take it. That will be all. From everyone.”

The room grew quiet. Fei wanted to scream. The pain from her wrist only intensified. She looked down, and a bone was clearly out of position. Fei looked up to Badger. There were tears in her eyes. She wanted to tell Badger how sorry she was. She wanted to tell Spider how it was all a lie. How all of it was her own doing and how she used Badger to get what she wanted. Most of all how she was not some helpless prey to Badger’s predation. She loved Badger in return. But the pain of the wrist was too much for her to bear.

Guo Xue. How did Spider know about Guo Xue?

Her vision began to fade, and it all went black.