I strode to a table and 10 minutes later, Mark called me to grab my food. It’d be weird eating with Iseult there, so I waved and teleported to my favorite electronics store.

As soon as the worker there spotted me, he shouted. They knew me well. I blew him a kiss and stole the best camera they had. Nice, a Pyx-Titanium. They were out last time I came.

Before the security guards could force me out, I teleported to the Genewall building on 4th. They had an open roof, so it was a good place to eat and chill until Iseult made a move. To pull off my plan, I couldn’t start too early.

Four days later, I amused myself by causing random mischief among Genewall staff. A man set his pen on the desk, so I shifted it to the floor. Hehe, now he had to pick it up. I kept my camera rolling even though it couldn’t see through walls. Narration would have to do.

Ah, finally. Iseult snuck from McBurger King’s back door. He’d investigated Genewall for the past few nights and found the secret entrance to the basement floors. Now I could play.

I teleported 50 floors underground into a lab crawling with scientists and flipped my trusty duct tape roll around an index finger. Nerds stood with their arms in big chemical vents or took notes while torturing animals. The air smelled and tasted like dust. Concrete walls and dim lighting created a suffocating atmosphere.

I’d need to clear this place of its nerd infestation, so good thing I was a certified exterminator. I specialize in killing ants, but occasionally I switched to uncles. Not much different from scientists.

Several security cameras zeroed in on me, so I bowed. Act one of my show had commenced. The security team would have front row seats and could make a special guest appearance if their agents allowed.

A scowling scientist paced the hall in my direction. With a snap, I teleported him before me. I taped his mouth shut and arms to his sides, and I popped him into one of many locked closets so he wouldn’t fuss.

More scientists spotted me and tried to either fight or sound an alarm. A blaring alarm would attract all flies at once, but I didn't want to draw the upper floors. I stopped people heading for alarms but let them yell to attract more lambs to the slaughter.

I strolled deeper into the compound with people throwing chairs and fire extinguishers at me from all directions. Everything that came close, I teleported past me. One had the bright idea to throw a strange liquid at me, so I shifted everything at him. I didn’t want my clothing contaminated.

Through all this, I bound scientists one at a time and sent them to the shadow realm, otherwise known as a locked closet. This was a long time coming, so I wanted to have fun with it.

When I’d whittled them down to a couple scientists, they ran away, so I had to shift them back to me and tie them up. There, the lab was clear.

I gave each room a once over. Fancy chemical here, fancier chemical there, boring. Any animal I came across, I sent into random places around Three Faces. Would Nut Tree Park get a rabbit or a komodo dragon? Nobody knew.

After my tour, I peered at Iseult’s progress. He’d made a beeline for the bottom floor and had passed through 28 already. He took some time to look around, but I’d already seen through this whole facility and his princess was in another castle. They only held test animals here, no humans. If his partner was in the building, she worked for Genewall.

A wall opened and 10 security guards with assault rifles piled out. Finally, fodder appeared to make things interesting. This play almost went stale.

They opened fire, but I slipped into a room. Dust and concrete fragments flew everywhere. Glass doors and windows shattered down the hall. I had to change my hiding spot as walls fractured and crumbled. Random lab objects teleported above the guards’ heads as I waved my arms. Pained groans echoed around the halls, hidden by indiscriminate gunfire.

Ah crap, a guard spasmed on the floor after a chemical spilled on him. Methyl mercury—I’d need to steer clear of that. I popped him into a hospital waiting room. Hope this didn’t break his NDA.

These guards acted like they had infinite ammo, firing willy nilly on the off chance they’d hit me. This place would get a bad yelp review later. ‘Terrible service and the food was cold, but 3 stars for the warm welcome.’

Honestly, this performance sucked. Ducking and hiding wouldn’t entertain the masses. I wanted a do-over. I teleported the guards back to the hidden doorway and dropped a good old vending machine on them. Two people a year died from vending machines in Three Faces, so this would balance vending machine karma for half a decade. If they died, of course.

The nine wrestled the lump of metal and delicious snacks off themselves and stumbled to their feet. Tenacious, but their injuries were obvious. Could they take it again? Find out tonight at nine.

Or find out now. I dropped the vending machine on them again and several yelled in pain. While they struggled to heave the machinery off, I took that time to concentrate on precision teleportation. In a snap, their guns and clothes disappeared and reappeared in a neat pile ten meters away. With the men disrobed, I popped them into the streets. Hehe, have fun as voyeurs.

Since I’d emptied the lab, I shifted a desk with a built-in lamp and a chair to the hallway, facing an elevator at the floor’s edge. The desk didn’t fit, so I left it with one side lifted against the wall at an angle. My new camera rested on a table in a lab room. It would capture everything in the hallway up to the elevator.

Most hallway lights had shattered in the gunfight, but I turned off the rest to make the ambiance spookier. I kept one light on behind the desk so when I sat, I’d be shrouded in shadow. To further push the facade, I snagged a white alley cat.

“Good kitty.”

It yowled and scratched, but my godlike musculature withstood the assault. With my amazing people skills, I surmised the cat hated me.

“That’s okay, little guy. I forgive you.”

After some time, the cat stopped struggling and instead growled on my lap. Yes, let your will collapse. Submit to me, tiny creature. I pet the cat’s head to show it love and took my place behind the desk.

Back in the security room, guards bellowed into phones and sent videos of me to a separate facility. Wow, those videos sucked. I’d posed before their cameras so much. How had they not gotten my good side?

I snapped out of my observation when the elevator chimed. The main course had arrived. Places everyone. Act evil.