I don't know if I should laugh. I probably should.

This game is seriously looking down on the little snake. 300 XP is enough for Sal to level up, and while I admit that the first few levels in VMMORPG games are laughably easy, this is just sad.

"Survive in the plains outside of beginner's village for three straight days with your summoner" - this is the beginner's village! What is there to survive? And three days? Three days is nothing. The whole quest is one big joke.

But...

Outside of the village, it isn't safe. Not really.

I stop celebrating, and instead, I start worrying. Outside the village, there's going to be snakes. Snakes to the right, snakes to the left. Up. Down. Snakes, snakes, snakes. Snakes everywhere.

I have to live out there. I have to live with the s-s-snakes for three freaking days without dying, without going back to the safety of the village.

I fear that three minutes is impossible, not to talk about three days!

But this shitty quest is 300 XP! It's like free XP! I'll feel like an idiot if I'll fail something so darn easy! Well, it's not like I logged in to beat this game. It was never my intention, so even if I don't succeed, it should be fine, right?

Wrong!

Do you know why? Do you want to know why?! Let me tell you now, the reason why is that failure to complete the quest equals death! In this shitty game, where you only get one life, when you die, you don't get to revive. Death is, plain and simple, death!

How am I supposed to be ready to face those fangs monsters back at work if I die in the game? I won't. I'll get fired!

Do you know how hard I worked to land this dream job?

It close to home, so I don't have to get up early each morning. The pay is dreamy, the hours are nice, and it's not like you have to do much.

This job is the best job I've ever heard of, so to throw it away because of one stupid quest is unforgivable!

That means I've got to do my best! I have to... I have to - god, pull yourself together, man! - I've got to stay near the s-s-snakes. Three days. Me, and them. The ultimate challenge. (▀̿Ĺ̯▀̿ ̿)

Time to conveniently change the topic! - "Hey, what about the Classes? I know you said they're empty until I reach level 10, but what kind of Classes are there? What should I take? I'm talking about my options, my options!"

Sal did a little snake dance - he appears to be thinking. Must be hard, since he's not the sharpest tool in the box if you know what I mean.

I guess that it kind of helps that Sal's not all that scary... and not all that snake-like if I'm completely honest here. Just looking at him moving his tail as if it's a dog's tail is enough to make me smile.

"Ho, there's a lot of awesome Classes you could take now that you're human! There's this one Class where you can enhance my stats and make me more powerful, and a Class that's great with poisonous snakes, and a Class that makes a lot of money, but that's not helpful, so I don't recommend that one." The little snake nodded it's head sagely.

Of course, you don't recommend the Class that will make my life easier. Stupid little snake. You wouldn't know anything valuable if it smacked you in the face. You're a snake. You don't need money, but I do. I need to eat! I need to drink!

I need money!

Wait a second...

"Hey," I call loudly, but I need to do it once more before the little snake stops talking. It reminds me of a children's movie character, but I can't remember its name. I think it started with an 'S' - that character too, it wouldn't stop talking.

"You aren't supposed to interrupt me," the little snake whined.

"Sorry." I really wasn't.

"Ok, so what do you need little brother~," the little snake said happily.

"Money." I say coldly "I noticed that in the quest you took there wasn't any mention of any payment...? Usually, don't you get some money after you finish a quest?"

The little snake made some funny noises, which I guess is its' attempt at laughter? I don't know.

"We don't need money, silly!" The little snake rolled its' eyes.

"Sal." I said calmly, "I need money. I need money to survive. Do you want me to die?"

Sal's mouth opened wide. He looked at me like he never saw me before. Could it be? Is it finally happening? Sal, did you figure out the truth? Do you understand the simple fact that I'm human? I've always been human. I've never been a snake.

I look at Sal, and - "It's that curse again, isn't it?" It asks me sadly.

Wha-?

No!

That has nothing to do with your make-belief curse! It never existed in the first place!

God!

What do I have to do to knock some sense into that snake-skull of yours! Pea brain! No, that's an insult to peas. What's smaller than a pea?

"It's the curse. It makes you do things the human way, doesn't it?" The little bastard says sadly, "You can't hunt, can you? And you're just a little kid, my poor, cute little brother~."

I want to hit you.

I really want to hit you, like really bad.

Right. Freaking. Now.

"..."

"Sure, whatever."