Alessia was murdered. It was a possibility that had crossed my mind but I'd initially dismissed it after hearing that the guards found nothing. Now as I stood amongst the search party mere feet away from the monster she called a father I felt all of my sadness dry up, replaced by a deep wellspring of rage only a few drops away from overflowing. I can't lose control yet, I'm still not one hundred percent sure he's guilty.

I focused on the present and stopped gnawing on my sleeve, I reached down like I was scratching my leg and made sure it was still there. Alessia's knife was strapped to my thigh underneath my dress, I wouldn't make the same mistake as her, a secret weapon's no good for you if you can't get to it in time. A kitchen knife wouldn't do much good against an animus blade but if he didn't expect it…

I shook my head and tried my best to dismiss those thoughts, to my left, a man dressed in chainmail with a pointed helmet walked alongside me. I convinced him to stick with me so far all I need to do now is separate him from the group for a couple of questions. I say convinced but a guard had little reason to refuse to protect a young woman.

"Excuse me."

I asked as politely as possible. The man turned and beamed at me. He was fairly average, overall and appeared to be in his early twenties, his most defining features were his long, almost fluttery eyelashes and the stray locks of brown hair that poked out from his helmet.

"What's wrong? Everything alright?"

"Would you mind if I sat down for a quick breather? I'm not used to this much exercise."

I put too much effort into trying to act normal and it came out kind of stilted. Why did I do that? It wasn't a lie, I was getting tired and I didn't know how to go about separating someone from a group inconspicuously. In my head, I pictured using all manner of deception like the spies I'd read about in tales of political intrigue. But the reality was far more mundane.

"Not at all, do you have any problems with me sticking around? I don't feel comfortable leaving a young lady alone at this time of day, it'll make it easier for you to catch up to the patrol too."

That was easier than expected. I thought there'd be at least a little resistance or that I'd have to request that he stay behind but he went out of his way to assist me. I looked for a patch of grass that looked thick enough to be a sort of cushion to sit on and spent a moment calming my nerves. Only now, as the rest of the search party continued forward into the distance, did I realise that I was isolated. I wondered why he was so eager to help and looked at him with suspicion, half expecting him to jump me.

Instead, he just stood on guard, occasionally squinting into the distance whenever he might have spotted something. Maybe I was starting to get jumpy for no reason? Alessia's disappearance was weighing heavily on my mind and I was starting to see danger in everything.

During an instance when he was looking off towards the horizon I made my move.

"You know I was bedridden when you guys were investigating Alessia's place. I was distraught about it for a while."

He didn't even turn to look at me before speaking.

"I am truly sorry we haven't turned up anything yet but rest assured it should only be a matter of time."

"Would it help if I offered anything I know, I don't know if you know this but I was one of her close friends."

"It can't hurt to have more information."

he sighed and squatted down to meet my eye level and asked

"What would you like to report?"

"I don't know, could I ask what you already know so that I don't waste time with stuff you already have."

He sort of half threw his hands in the air

"Not all that much besides the fact that she ran away from home after a private disagreement."

What now? I can't just ask how he knows she ran away, can I? As far as anyone is concerned that part of the story isn't in question. I need to ask about her room indirectly.

"Did she leave anything behind? Like a note or message?"

"No, otherwise this wouldn't be such an aimless search. She took just about everything she could carry and disappeared later that night without a word."

No, she didn't. Barely anything was missing from her room. I couldn't help but seethe in silence. That forge-burned, liar Jon knew, he knew what happened to her all along! He had the gall to lie to my face and pretend to be upset about her.

"Nothing to add huh?"

The guard mistook my silent fury for an answer.

"Too bad, if nothing else I hoped you might be able to help us get inside her head a bit. It'd be nice to have some direction."

"I don't think she was the type to run away."

I spoke without thinking, I was told to keep what I knew a secret but it couldn't hurt to have them look a little closer.

"Yeah everyone we asked said the same thing."

"No I mean maybe she is hiding out somewhere kinda nearby. She was always good at climbing and liked to explore, maybe you missed her hiding place."

He flashed a well-meaning smile.

"Hadn't thought of that, it would be good to give the areas we checked a once-over to make sure we haven't missed anything. Is that all?"

I stood up and brushed off my behind.

"Yeah, I think I'm ready to get back to the search as well."

It didn't matter if he followed through on the more in-depth search, I just wanted to suggest that they search more locally instead of spreading out any further.

It didn't take long for us to rejoin the group, true to his word he knew roughly where the search party was and it didn't take long to rejoin the group. As expected they had no news and after a little bit more searching they called it off for tonight.

By the time we made it back to the village the sun had fully set leaving only the moons and stars to light our way. Before the guards headed back I asked for the name of the eyelashes one, it seemed like a good idea to know someone helpful if I'm ever in trouble.

"Names Boud, but most just call me Bud."

"My name's Joan, thanks again for your help Boud."

He saluted by tapping his forehead with two parallel fingers before heading out with the other guards.

All that walking left me pretty tired so I was extremely grateful to make it back home, Auntie and mother were both back already so I was able to give my report to both of them in person.

Mother looked like she was lost in thought, her hand rested against her mouth as she stared downwards, Auntie was the one to respond to me first.

"Well it seems pretty clear to me, old Jon is guilty. Now the question is of what? I don't want to be the bearer of bad news Jo but I wouldn't hold onto the hope that you will meet her again. She's probably either dead or worse but Mark my words we'll find out."

I couldn't help but feel angry, at Jon, at my uselessness, at the world, I bottled up the feeling of rage and just wanted to go to sleep. I just wanted to not think for a while. I was about to head straight to bed before mother put her arm across my doorway barring entry.

"You're not going to bed without eating."

I looked at her face, the wrinkles near her eyes were deepening and it looked like she was struggling with something behind her pleading eyes. But Auntie had a different issue

"And don't think I'll let you skip your exercise. Remember every day and every night without exception, no matter how you feel, no excuses. Your mom let you get too doughy."