《Not Quite What You Meant (Short Story Collection)》Darkness In Her Eyes
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Her eyes were grey, like storm clouds obscuring the noonday sun, unchanging even when she smiled and laughed. His glittered green with mischief, purple with happiness, blue with calm, gold with love.
They walked together oftener as the days went on, happening upon one another at appointed times when they were both free, and their conversations grew longer and deeper as they reached past each others surfaces and into their depths.
His eyes shone with ever-shifting colour. Hers never changed.
Yet when he asked her if she wore contacts, for the colour could not be natural, she laughed and shook her head. "They used to be blue, when I was younger. They darkened as I aged." She shrugged, watching his curiosity-pink irises fade back to happiness-purple as he smiled. "It doesn't matter, though, does it."
Her eyes continued to darken as the months passed, from noonday thunderstorm to evening hurricane. His stayed the same as ever, flickering from one shade to another with his every shift in mood.
And then one day their conversation turned to their families, a topic upon which they'd never lingered before. For the first time, he noticed a true shift. The hurricane-grey of her eyes deepening in an instant to midnight-black, before she smiled and changed the subject and her eyes returned to normal.
He almost convinced himself he'd imagined it.
"What were you like as a child?" he asked, forced calm tinting his uncertain concern-orange eyes with the faintest sheen of blue.
"Quiet, withdrawn. I never did get on well with others. You know me. I prefer numbers to people."
"Not all people, though," he teased, love-gold glinting from his eyes.
She blushed and turned away. "Some are more tolerable than others, I suppose."
"Have you considered moving out?" he blurted the question, concern-orange returned. "You're old enough. We could get an apartment together."
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Her eyes darkened. "No thank you." Her tone suddenly cold.
Then it was his turn to blush, shame-pale filling his eyes. "N-no, not like that, I didn't mean-- I just, you seem. . ."
"Weak? Vulnerable? Like I need to be rescued?" The words came sharp, clipped, tinged somewhere between manic and desperate. "Who do you think you are? Who do you think I am? We're friends. Barely friends. Acquaintances. Why should you have any say in where I go, what I do? Do you think I want to give my life into your keeping, just because you've got more money and don't have to live with your parents? Does that make you better?"
"No, no, of course not, that's not what I meant--"
But there was no stopping her now. "I can make my own choices! I can make my own way! I don't need you, I don't need them, I don't need anyone!" Tears glinted against her midnight-black eyes. "And no one needs me."
She spun on her heels and stalked away, but he ran after her and grabbed her arm. "Don't leave like this, please. I didn't mean. . . you can't. . ."
But he didn't know what he was trying to say, couldn't find words to break through the panic growing in his throat, and when she slapped his hand away and screamed at him to leave her alone, he did not follow.
The next day, she didn't come. He waited, eyes shifting from concern-orange to fear-yellow as he paced and paced and paced. He finally left, other obligations forcing him to abandon his vigil.
Nor did she appear the next day, or the next.
He replayed their conversation over and over again in his mind, trying to think of any way he could have steered it differently. He cursed himself as a fool, wished he could go back, say something else. Anything else, not to drive her down that dark path.
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He wished he'd looked for answers sooner, wished he'd been able to see the signs.
She hadn't been able to ask for help, hadn't been willing to accept what he clumsily offered.
But she'd needed it.
There was a particular shade of grey for depression, a particular black for despair. And he'd grown so used to seeing them as part of her, he'd never thought to wonder why.
And now it was too late.
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Old Riding Author Lunatic Asylum
Just off the A19, in the dark, incomprehensible lands known as Yorkshire, there lies a town. A town where shadow-silent alleys glint with the secret hunger of knives. Where blood soaks the chipboard window shutters of forsaken terraces stretching off into the night. Where the smog-choked air rattles with the depraved laughter echoing out from clubs that can only generously be described as post-apocalyptic. Well, that’s Middlesbrough. But down the A19 a bit (an impossibly long way down, actually) there lies another town: Raughnen, in the ancient, forgotten Old Riding. It is an equal match in muggery and thuggery alike. It also has magic spells and pointy wizard hats. And now, across the miles and across all sensibilities, a pretty nasty power (a magic one) calls out for its pretty nasty counterpart (a decidedly unmagic one): a proper sound Boro lad. Nothing good can come of it. This is a collection of one novella and four connected short stories: I. A Yorkshire Summoning II. Old Riding Day Trip (the novella) III. Heaven is a Parmo IV. Death on the 66 V. Death on the 257 In total, this comprises 34 chapters totalling around 35,000 words, so try not to worry. It will be over relatively quickly. There are three more short stories with more tenuous links to the core collection: Rush, Paper Round and Scenario 79: Sausage Fingers, all of which can be found in my collection Short Records of Misadventure. Reading these may allow you to make more sense of certain parts of the story, if any sense is to be made at all. NOTE: There are instances of prejudice and discrimination within these stories, including elements of sexism and ageism, which are purely the thoughts and actions of the characters involved and which certainly do not reflect my own views on these matters. ANOTHER NOTE; A WARNING, PERHAPS: This can get a bit weird. In less than 150 pages, we have four viewpoints, first and third person narratives, and a completely disjointed plot with lots of gaps, dead ends and no real resolution. Also ZERO lunatic asylums. It's all a bit odd. If that sort of thing isn't your cup of tea, which it most likely isn't, it might be best to move on now.
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Ahs preferences imagines
(Mainly Evan Peters characters) I take requests and update as regularly as I can!
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