《How Do Centaurs Wear Pants?》Magic is Science Not Yet Understood
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I was getting nervous that this whole thing had just been some guilt-induced hallucination. It was already five in the morning and there was still no sign of Dr. Phillips, not that I'd recognize her or she'd recognize me. That idea also made me worried, it was entirely possible that she had already walked past me and was waiting on me inside while I was outside on the sidewalk. It crossed my mind that maybe I should have made some kind of sign, but that was the kind of forward thinking I often lacked.
"Elsie?"
My head snapped to the side and met the stare of a woman approximately my height, but probably at least thirty pounds lighter than me. I was pretty average weight for my height, which meant she looked like some delicate waif, not underfed, but what many would say were the product of enviably genetics. The size of the bag and suitcase she was carrying looked like they might knock her off her feet at any point. The other striking feature was her clear blue eyes hidden behind the thick, black frames of her glasses and startling against her blonde hair. Basically, she looked like she could have had a career in modelling, but instead pursued academia.
"Uh, yeah," I said. Not exactly the most professional of introductions.
"Great." She let out a huff of relief and visibly relaxed. "I looked up your photo, but they're always out of date. Most people don't bother replacing the one they were forced to take during freshman orientation."
"That would be me," I admitted.
"Well, it's nice to meet you." She sat the suitcase down that she was carrying and extended her hand. "I obviously am Dr. Phillips, though I would much rather you call me Tammy."
"Nice to meet you, Tammy." I shook her hand, then we both gathered our luggage to prepare to enter the gauntlet that is airport security.
After being prodded and adequately scrutinized by security, we ended up on the plane just before takeoff. Our bags barely fit into the overhead compartment as we both had just skirted by on the bag dimensions requirement for carry ons.
"So," I said once we were buckled in and ready for takeoff, "what exactly is our mission?"
"Straight to the point, I like it," she chuckled. "I'm sure you've heard about the possible cryptid corpse that was discovered?"
"The one in France? Of course it's been all over the forums."
"That would be the one, however, it being in France is a mistranslation of the original reporting, that's why we're on our way to French Guiana," she explained.
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That made much more sense. I had pretty much accepted that most parts of the world didnt house cryptids, there were too many eyes and technology for them not to be more routinely spotted and documented. It was much more likely that undiscovered species would be exactly where most of the world's unexplored land was located.
"Though I likely think we're dealing with some kind of variation of a hybrid man and beast, I would doubt that something like a horse would have evolved in a climate like a rainforest. It is more likely to be like some sort of tapir or capybara, but that's where we come in, where there is a corpse, there are live specimens out there somewhere."
The plane had begun it's takeoff, my stomach dropped as the climb to altitude commenced. I unconsciously began gripping the arm rests for dear life, my nails digging into the fabric. I tried my best to keep a calm expression on my face, but it was impossible thanks to how hard my teeth were clamped together.
Tammy glanced towards me and gave me a little smile, then politely focused her attention elsewhere. I was glad that she didn't try to assure me or tell me there was nothing to be afraid of, that usually only made me bring up all the malfunctions and dark scenarios that could play out during the ascent. There was no sense in the both of us being terrified.
As the plane finally leveled off, I was able to slowly relax my hands and jaw, both now aching. I could somewhat feel secure now, though I would have to go through the landing which was much the same event.
"So, uh, capybara?" I asked once I felt like I could safely speak and not rock the plane ever so gently and send it on a collision course. "I've never heard of a creature like that."
"Of course you haven't, most of the theories on cryptids are done by people whose last meaningful study of biology was in high school. They fancy themselves experts, but most of them are just recycling the same myths and legends over and over again." She turned to give me a meaningful look. "Working with me means you're going to have to let go of a lot of what you think you know, I can guarantee if you really sit down and think about it, most of the popular claims have little feasibility in the real world."
"I suppose…"
"Let's take a clear example, the wendigo." Her face had lit up and excitement ran across her features. "There is so much supposed 'magic' behind how such a creature would exist that it's assinnine to believe in. Might there be a similar creature minus the mystical properties? Maybe, but it's not going to ever be a human who has mutated into a creature. Evolution and biology just don't work that way."
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"Magic is often science that we haven't yet explained," I countered. It was my best line for shutting people down who wanted to use magic not being real to dismiss certain cryptids' existence.
"I agree, but I think there's a dangerous line that we do not want to cross. As scientists, we need to be able to shift the facts out of the overblown information." Taking out her phone, she unlocked the screen and began to sort through files on her phone. "Let me show you what I mean based on the report I've saved about our so-called centaur. Here it says that the body was found ringed with a fairy circle of mushrooms. That is an interesting piece of information that many might immediately attribute to some sort of magical aura, but as biologists, we know that a decomposing body is a perfect nutrient source to encourage all sorts of fungi to grow. I bet that if we can find that space, we would also find a healthy mushroom population not far from there."
"Okay," I conceded, "I guess I get what you mean now. Most of the magic aspects of cryptids can be explained by science."
"Something like that. Though, it is important for us to be willing to throw away 'facts' that have no grounding in reality. For instance, it says in the report that the man who found the corpse claimed it had antlers approximately three feet wide, but that they slowly disappeared in a 'shower of golden light.' I think we both can agree that is most likely a fabrication to enhance the ambiance of the story. It's meant to make the whole discovery more mysterious and fuel exciting conversation on the subject, but I can't think of a solid way to begin to explain that kind of phenomenon, there would always be some trace left, biological material does not just disappear mysteriously into the ether."
That was a fair assessment, there was a heavy amount of creative writing present on most of the sites and forums that hosted cryptid research and discussion. It seemed like most people desperately wanted the world to be somehow magical and mysterious, ignoring the fact that even the biology of common animals could sometimes still blow us away. It always brings to mind the biology of crows and other corvids, they are birds yet so acutely intelligent in some ways that it seemed almost impossible. Scientific evidence of understanding how to trade, pass along information to future generations, and even speak understandable language under the right conditions was astounding to think about. They didn't necessarily need to also grant wishes and cast spells to be thoroughly interesting.
"Sorry," Tammy laughed awkwardly, "I get a little worked up about people spreading the idea that these undiscovered species are somehow magical. The idea only hurts the effort to discover and document them, science sponsors do not want to throw their money away at something that sounds fabricated. That's why there are no official, relevant academic programs specifically for cryptids and everything that we do must be carefully shrouded in the guise of being something else."
"That's why you didn't tell me very much about the trip and wanted me to keep quiet about it." It made sense, I doubted the department would want to spend any of their limited funds on centaur searching.
"Exactly, we're officially there to document and acquire samples of the local flora. They allowed me to pick a specific region with dense rainforest and I did, it just so happens the site overlaps."
The regular hum of the plane and my inability to sleep due to excitement had begun to catch up with me, my eyelids heavy despite the intense desire for me to keep talking. It almost never aligned where someone with actual scientific knowledge was interested in the topic. I had stopped a while ago actually posting on any of the sites, my attempts to put real science with the situation often went ignored, or harshly disputed because "it's magic, not science."
Sensing my own waning energy, Tammy slipped her phone back in her pocket and pulled out an eye mask. "I think we probably both need to rest. I don't know about you, but I'm always a little jittery the night before I leave for field work. We'll be there before you know it and then the real fun begins."
I agreed and leaned my head back, wishing I had thought to bring anything like a mask or pillow, planes were never well designed to be slept in unless you paid the big bucks. The random jitters and bumps kept me awake for a while, making me feel like I had to constantly change the position of my arms and head to find something remotely comfortable, but eventually the distant fear of the plane trip faded away and I sunk down into fitful sleep. I would need all the rest I could get for the adventure that lay ahead.
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