Castiel sat cross-legged on his bed and strummed his guitar. His eyes kept wandering either to the clock on the wall or to the window so he could see if someone walked to the house. He had left school over two hours ago, after he had got angry and told Sarah not to bother with the walk. He had shouted at her too many times. He felt bad about it every time, but it was because of that Arthur. His presence pissed Castiel off so much. He was clearly trying to hit on Sarah, but she was too oblivious to realize it. She kept saying they were friends, but could a guy really want to be just friends with her when she was so…so herself. And now they were together somewhere. Sarah was probably angry, and Arthur would take the opportunity to cheer her up. The strings of the guitar twanged harshly.

Castiel sighed and put the guitar away. She really wasn’t going to come. He had half expected and half hoped Sarah would show up, even though he didn’t have a right to. He had been rude to her, and Castiel wouldn’t blame Sarah if she never wanted to even speak with him again. He picked up Tim who had been sleeping on the pillows. The doll had been suspiciously quiet for a while. It would probably want something soon.

The doorbell rang, and Castiel jumped on his feet. Ares barked downstairs and scratched the door. Castiel tried to look out of the window, but the person behind the door was standing just out of his view. He laid Tim on the bed and hurried downstairs. While running down, he hoped it would be Sarah at the door and on the next step dreaded it was Sarah. What if she was mad? Ares was still barking and whining, and when Castiel opened the door to the entryway, the dog tried to push past him to see who was coming, but Castiel blocked his way.

“You wait here.”

Ares whined behind the closed door.

Sarah twisted her hands while waiting for the door to open. She was late so maybe Castiel didn’t want to even see her. Maybe he was still angry? Ares at least was home; Sarah could hear the barking and door scratching. Sarah considered ringing the doorbell for a second time when the door opened. She backed away a few steps. Castiel was standing in the doorway holding to the doorhandle. He didn’t say anything.

“Hi.”

“Hi.”

Good start…

“Sorry I’m late but I came for the walk like I promised.”

“Why?”

“Why what?”

“Why did you come when I told you to stay away?”

Sarah swallowed. She shouldn’t have come. Castiel was mad.

“Sorry. I just wanted to since I promised, and I hoped you wouldn’t mind it. I can leave…”

“I didn’t mean that,” Castiel hurried to say. “I just wondered why you would want to come here when I yelled at you like that…” he added with quieter voice.

Sarah smiled softly. “Yeah, you were pretty rude, but I didn’t think you really meant what you said.”

Castiel stared at her without saying a word. Sarah was either dumb or way too nice. He had yelled at her and she still came to see him because she was sure he wasn’t serious. Of course, he hadn’t meant his words, but usually people didn’t question it. They just happily stayed away. Except Leon. He just looked at Castiel and raised an eyebrow.

“Come in or Ares is gonna claw himself through that door,” Castiel said.

The dog was still whining and clawing the door that separated the hallway from the entryway. Hearing Sarah’s voice had made him louder.

Sarah walked in and closed the door behind her. Castiel put his hand on the door handle.

“He might come with force. Are you prepared?” he asked. The scratching got louder and Castiel bumped the door with his knee.

“Y…yeah,” Sarah said but didn’t sound very convincing. She liked Ares when he was calm, but too much energy and excitement made Sarah nervous.

Castiel opened the door slightly and immediately a black snout appeared and tried to push the door open.

“Sit,” Castiel commanded. After two more tries and closing the door slightly, the snout disappeared. A deep sigh told that Ares sat down and was probably pouting.

“Now, stay.” Castiel opened the door, but Ares only needed to see Sarah when he charged towards her. Castiel tried to stop him but Ares easily leaped over his leg and jumped against Sarah, pushing her against the front door. Sarah covered her face with her hands when Ares’s claws dug on her shoulders. He tried to infiltrate his tongue between Sarah’s fingers to lick her face.

“Ares!” Castiel shouted and grabbed his collar. Ares trashed and whined when Castiel pulled him back. “Sit down you dunce or I’ll throw you outside,” he grumbled. “I’ve told you million times you have to behave. You can’t just charge towards people like that.”

Ares huffed and sat down. His tail wagged wildly against Castiel’s feet.

“Are you alright?”

Sarah nodded and lowered her slobber-covered hands. Her heart drummed in her chest and her back throbbed from the spot that had hit the door handle. Her fingers trembled when she wiped her hands on her jeans. She waited for her breathing to calm down before taking a few steps towards Ares. He calmly sniffed her leg and shoes.

Castiel sighed. “I wish he’d be like that from the start. He’s usually never this excited about seeing anyone except my parents.”

“We’ve just become very good friends, right Ares?” Sarah smiled and scratched the dog’s neck. She really liked Ares when he was calm. The surprise attacks still made her nervous, but she knew Ares didn’t mean anything bad, so after the initial shock everything was fine. Castiel smiled a little as well. It was nice to see Sarah and Ares get along.

Castiel shifted weight from one leg to another. The clock on the wall was nearing four. It’d be dark very soon.

“We should probably go before it gets dark outside,” he said.

“Oh yeah, you’re right.”

“Tim’s upstairs. If you want to come and get him. While I get my phone and stuff.”

“Sure.”

Sarah felt a little pinch in her stomach. She had never been to Castiel’s room before. Or any boy’s room for that matter.

“So annoying that it’s already this late. Getting the art supplies was such a pain,” Sarah sighed as they climbed up the stairs. “We could hardly carry it all. They were so heavy too.” Maybe Mr Roe has asked them so he wouldn’t have to go there.

“Sounds like it. Roe better give you some kind of reward.”

“I know, right. Arthur asked if I wanted to go get some cake to celebrate our freedom.”

“He asked you that?”

“Yeah.”

“Of course he did…”

“What’s with that tone? You sound like he kicked a puppy.”

“I just…”

“Just what? You’re always so mean to him.”

“He wants in your pants.”

Castiel opened the door to his room. Sarah followed him inside with growing annoyance.

“You keep saying that but how do you know? Can’t a guy just ask a friend out without any hidden meaning behind it?”

“Probably could but it’s just obvious what he wants.”

“How? How is it obvious? Because I don’t see it.”

“It just is. The younger guys are like that you know. He probably thinks it’d be cool to be with an older girl.”

“Oh my god, Castiel shut up! You’re being ridiculous. He’s just a year younger than me. And just so you know, some people actually care about others as people and not as someone to just sleep with. Why do you even care? What does it matter to you what someone else wants to do with me?”

“Because I…,” Castiel started but closed his mouth. Why did he care? There was really no reason he should’ve, but just the thought of Sarah and Arthur together in any way annoyed him. It wrenched his stomach and weighed on his chest. The thought of Sarah and someone else didn’t feel right. He wanted Sarah. The realization caused his heart jump, it almost skipped a beat or two.

“You what?” Sarah’s cheeks were flushed red from annoyance and her heart thumped in her chest. She wasn’t used to arguments and she was nervous.

“I…”

But before Castiel could say more, Sarah noticed Tim on the edge of the bed.

“Why is Tim like that?” She hurried to pick him up.

“I put him there when I came open the door.”

“You can’t put a baby so close to the edge! He could’ve fallen down!”

“Really Sarah? It’s a doll. You remember that, right? It’s not a real kid. It can’t just roll down on its own.”

“O--of course I remember.” She had forgotten for a bit. “But Ares could’ve taken him and chewed on him. How would you explain that to Miss Cassidy? Sorry, my dog ate our child?”

“It’s not really a big deal. Why are you so angry about it?”

“Because I just want you to take this seriously. And... I don’t know. Because I’m annoyed. You are always mean to Arthur and then you seem like you don’t want to do this project properly and… and you don’t probably even like me.” Sarah felt tears pushing their way to the corners of her eyes. It annoyed her even more. She didn’t want to cry in front of Castiel over something like this. But she couldn’t help it. Arguing had made her emotional.

“What do you mean I don’t like you? Have I ever said something like that?”

“Well…no. But what’s in me to like? I don’t even look pretty. My hair is such a boring colour and...” She muttered the last words quietly and embarrassed. “I’m not special at all. Not like Mercedes.”

“What does Mercedes have to do with this? Has she bothered you again?”

“No.”

“What’s this all about then?”

“Nothing… I’m being dumb. Forget it.”

“Tell me. Why would you think I think you’re less good than Mercedes?”

“It’s a dumb thing. Just forget it,” Sarah muttered again. She swallowed some tears again.

“Tell me. Please.”

“A--arthur said that Mercedes is probably more your type. That you’d probably like her more because she’s pretty and looks kinda like Rachel.”

Castiel felt a growing urge to find Arthur and punch him.

“What does he think he knows? I thought it’s pretty obvious I don’t like her.”

“I… I thought so but it made sense… She looks more like your ex-girlfriend and has pretty hair and… and shapes… And I’m just really boring compared to her.”

Sarah wanted to disappear. She had embarrassed herself so badly. A tear rolled down her cheek, and she quickly wiped it away. She was so stupid.

Castiel didn’t know what to say. He was mad at Arthur. What kind of bullshit had the guy been talking? There was no way Castiel could like Mercedes with the amount of selfishness that was in her head. He would’ve lied if he said she looked bad, but Castiel wasn’t interested in just looks. Mercedes was too fake.

Sarah wiped another tear and sniffed. A wave of warmth washed over Castiel, and he walked to her.

“Hey, don’t cry. There’s no need.” His voice was soft and quiet, and it surprised him.

“I’m so stupid. Getting mad and then crying like this,” Sarah sniffed.

“You aren’t stupid. I shouldn’t have gotten angry. I’m sorry.”

“I’m sorry too. I didn’t mean to shout.”

“It’s alright.” Castiel smiled and wiped a tear from Sarah’s cheek with his thumb. His fingers brushed her cheek and the corner of her mouth. Sarah raised her eyes at his. They were red from crying and still watery. Castiel’s stomach twisted. His thumb brushed gently over Sarah’s bottom lip, and she opened her mouth slightly to take a quivering breath.

“You wanted to know why I care about you and Arthur,” Castiel said. “You claimed I don’t like you. It’s not true. I like you…in many ways.”

Castiel lifted Sarah’s chin slightly and leaned closer. His heart thumped wildly in his chest. Sarah didn’t move. Their noses brushed together, and Castiel could feel Sarah’s warm breath.

A clunk and loud whine made Castiel jump. Sarah staggered back a few steps; eyes wide and cheeks burning. Her hands were empty. Tim was on the floor, screaming.

“Oh no,” Sarah gasped and crouched down to pick up the doll. Castiel ran his hand through his hair and paced a few steps. His heart was acting wild, and emotions stormed in his head. Stupid doll. Sarah hushed Tim, but he kept crying.

“I’m so sorry Tim. I’m so sorry,” Sarah whispered. “I didn’t mean to. It was an accident. I’m sorry.” The doll started to calm down and she sighed with relief. She was terrible for dropping Tim like that.

“Sarah…”

Sarah looked at Castiel, and her face reddened immediately. She lowered her eyes.

“I…I need to go,” she said. “Sorry but I can’t come for the walk.”

And without waiting for any replies, she grabbed Tim’s diaper bag with her and dashed downstairs. Castiel stayed and soon he heard the door. When he glanced out of the window, he saw Sarah run to the street. He buried his face in his hands. He had messed up.

Sarah ran while squeezing Tim against her chest. She had been in such a hurry to get away that she hadn’t even taken put him in his carriage. Her thoughts were a complete mess.

She stopped to a street corner to catch her breath. Clouds of fog formed in the air with her heavy breathing. Her heart hammered in her chest.

It was hard to believe what had almost happened. Castiel had almost kissed her. There were no ifs or buts about it this time. It had definitely been an attempt to kiss. Sarah touched her chin from the spot Castiel’s fingers had been resting. A tingling feeling danced in her stomach. Did Castiel like her then? Or had it been just some kind of comforting gesture because she had been crying? He had said he liked her. But in what way? Was there really any question about it? For Sarah there was. She couldn’t think straight. What would’ve happened if she hadn’t dropped Tim? She hadn’t even realized her grip of him had loosened. Poor baby. Sarah felt terrible. She had just few minutes before that yelled at Castiel for being irresponsible and then she dropped Tim. But on the other hand, maybe it was good? Maybe Castiel was going to kiss her just because she was crying? If he had just tried to cheer her up in his own way? Then it could’ve been awkward if he had kissed. He had said he liked her, but if he meant it as a friend, he might’ve regretted the kiss later. So maybe it was good she had dropped Tim. It would’ve been a shame if their friendship got ruined.