《A Sheep Among Wolves》Chapter 23
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Leah
It had been a few days since my conversation with Alex and I had been thinking hard about what he said. He was right, that I was born to be a Luna. I had done plenty of research and knew that was the case for any mate of a born future Alpha. But I also knew I wasn't that girl anymore. My time in captivity had made me more... docile. I wasn't quite so fiery. So passionate or strong willed. Obviously Alex didn't know that since he didn't know me before I was captured and treated like a punching bag by what was supposed to be my soulmate, my fated mate. Part of me felt like I was returning to my old self. That parts of my old personality sparked back into place, like when we played in the snow. But I truly wasn't sure if I could be a good, effective Luna anymore. And this pack deserves an incredible Luna.
But I was also nearly one hundred percent sure that I wanted to be Alex's mate. The idea of having him at my side made almost anything seem possible. When he told me he loved me I thought I had died or was having a cruel dream.
To be loved by a man like that is the epitome of happiness. It could never be understated, underappreciated or even understood by most other people on this planet. So few fellow humans have known the loneliness, the desperation, the agony of having no one to rely on. To trust. To call your own. Everyone needs people. Everyone needs a pack.
It just turns out mine also turn into badass wolves.
So while Alex may be the cherry on top, this pack is really the ice cream sundae to the joy that is in my life. They fulfill me, give me purpose, help me grow, teach me and humble me by their kindness and acceptance. Alex may be my true soulmate, but the family he has given me is so much more. If he thinks I would be a good Luna for them, who am I to argue?
I wanted to tell him this, share my excitement and my decision, but he has been distracted and stressed since our converation. I doubted it had to do with me, as his treatment toward me had remained the same and I trusted he would tell me if he were upset with me. He didn't seem the kind of petty man who would hold a grudge rather than talk things out amicably like adults.
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I mean, he's seventy five years old.
I found myself missing him, so with a free afternoon I found myself meandering down the long hallway that leads to his office. I have become very familiar with this route and never come empty handed.
Armed with lunch for my overworked Alpha, I knock timidly on the door. I hear his low chuckle from the other side and can't help but smile.
He always knows it's me.
"Come in, little one." He calls and I push the door open gingerly and pad silently to his side, setting the food gently on his desk, trying to avoid the large stacks of paper.
"And to what do I owe the pleasure of your company?" He says warmly, his blue eyes shining bright, but there are circles under his eyes and his face seems pinched with concern.
"I missed my wolf." I say quietly, angling my body in between his legs and plopping on his lap. He grunts before smiling and wrapping his arms around me, tucking his face into my neck to breathe me in. He seems to relax and little and I encircle his neck with my arms, resting my temple against his head as he holds me quietly.
"You alwasys seem to know when I need you most." He murmurs, kissing the tender spot behind my ear. I shiver in his embrace and he laughs quietly, the vibrations of his chest warming me to my soul.
"That's what a good mate does." I whisper, and his body goes rigid.
"Mate? Have you come to some conclusions, little one?" He asks curiously, his eyes pouring over my face as if it will give him the answers he's looking for.
I nod and throw him a shy smile. He takes a deep breath and tightens his arms around me.
"Well? Are you going to tell me? Or just wait for me to die of suspense?" He asks, trying to keep an edge of humor to his voice, but I can see how wrought with tension he is. I want to shout to the world what have I decided, but I need one more question answered. Will he view me as his equal? Or just his mate.
"First, can you tell me what's going on?" I ask and he takes a deep shuddering breath.
"Why do you think something is going on?" He asks and I narrow my eyes at him.
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"You have been working more and are much more stressed than usual. Your mind constantly wanders and you avoid most direct questions." I respond and his eyebrows shoot up in surprise.
"Observant little human you are." He murmurs, but his voice still holds a touch of praise.
"Yes. I'm very impressive. Now spill." I say, urging him on. He chuckles and leans forward to kiss my temple, his lips lingering and warming my skin. He sighs before he continues and the troubled look that I've been trying to chase from his tired eyes returns.
"There were some survivors from Silas' pack. They want to take revenge on those of us that overthrew him. They have gathered some rogues. Desperate ones that will do just about anything for money and food. It's not right, really, to prey on them when they are in such a vulnerable state. Anyway, it seems one of the other packs that we alligned with was attacked. They lost twenty lives, many more injured and their pack infrastructure was damaged. They managed to kill quite a few and run the rest off when they got back up from another allied pack, but I'm concerned they will come for us. I've been pouring over resources, training schedules, tightening up border patrol and asking for assistance from other packs. We have an Alpha coming to visit in a couple of days, I'm hoping he'll sign a treaty and lend us some warriors while also helping to hunt down the psychopaths so we can take care of them before they attack the other two packs." He explains, reaching out to wrap a coil of my hair around his finger. The motion is slow and soothing, so at odds with his words. His willingness to share this with me, to tell me important things only strengthens my resolve. It also confirms to me that this man needs help.
"That's awful, Alex. That's so much to deal with alone." I say, cupping his face with my hand and running my thumb along his cheekbone. He gives me a sad, weathered smile and sighs again.
"I've been doing it alone for a long while. I can manage." He says and I shake my head.
"No. You won't be managing alone anymore." I say firmly and his eyes light up with interest.
"What are you saying, little one?" He asks curiously and I beam a wide smile at him.
"I'm saying I want to be your mate and your Luna. I want to help you run this pack, keep everyone happy, healthy and safe. I want to be here for you. To carry some of your burdens, to bounce ideas off of or just to hold you when you need a moment to dissengage. Whatever you need, Alex, I'll be here for you." I finish firmly and his smile grows with every word that slips from my mouth.
"Did you prepare that little speech?" He asks amused and I shake my head.
"No. Why? Was it that impressive?" I ask and he chuckles while nodding.
"Very impressivve. Not that I should be surprised. Everything about you is impressive." He whispers, closing the distance between us and embracing my lips gently with his, parting them as a sigh of content leaves me, allowing him to trace his tongue along mine. We stay locked together for a long time, enjoying the intimacy, the closeness that has been few and far between lately.
After awhile, Alex pulls away and I eye his red, moist and puffy lips, his flushed cheeks, warm smile and blue eyes that almost seem to be burning like the blue portion of a flame.
"I will take that to mean you still want me?" I ask, still trying to recapture my breath after the heated exchange. Alex tips his head back and lets out a deep, guttural laugh that brings joy to my heart and tingles to my flesh. When his amusement has subsided he looks back at me. His warm affectionate graze traverses my face as if trying to memorize every minute detail of this very important moment.
"Yes, Leah. I still want you. I will always want you." He says resolutely. There is not a single ounce of doubt in his firm set stare. I let out a breath of relief and sink my body against his warm chest. He seems so stone like and chiseled from afar, but the reality is his chest is warm, inviting and soft. I rest my head on his shoulder and close my eyes, relishing in this moment.
"Good." I say firmly with a touch of humor. "Because there's no getting rid of me now."
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