Chapter 37:

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When she walked away.. I wanted to pull her back to me and tell her yes, but my mind and body didn't work together to get her back to me.

My mind was racing with scenarios as to why she did it. And that was my first question, Why?

Walking into my room while throwing my suit jacket blindly without much thought, not caring where it went. I plotted myself down on the edge of the bed.

Was she right?

I wanted the truth but when I look at her.. my mother.. it fuels me after everything that she has done. So many questions left lingering waiting to be matched with its answer.

I shouldn't have pushed her away.. and now I know she's crying but it's because of my baggage that she tried to claim.. to help and it's still chaotic.

I should have left her alone.. but I was selfish in wanting her. And in the process I fell in love with her.

Maybe she's right... I am a jerk. A selfish one at that.

I stiffly stood up, the feeling of being numb was familiar as I walked into the bathroom in desperate need of a shower.

I didn't stay in there long. My thoughts seemed to have had a dance in my head, happy that they could roam freely even when I didn't want them to.

Drying my hair first with my towel, I proceeded to do the same with the rest of my body before walking out. Half of me expected her to be sitting awkwardly in the middle of the bed but the knowing side told me she wasn't coming back.

"Fuck it." Grabbing a pair of shorts, I slipped into them before walking out to go find her. I wasn't going to see if I could sleep without her, I would have failed.

Padding down the hall, I reached her door before opening it and sure enough she was there, sound asleep. I approached her silently, not wanting to wake her but she seemed uncomfortably even in her sleep. Lowering myself down, I saw dry tear stains mocking me as if telling me this is what I had done.

Grimacing, I took her into my arms before lifting her up to carry her back to our room where we both belonged.

I felt my head being lifted off my pillow and I jolted awake in alarm after feeling the rest of my body floating, but that wasn't possible. "W-what?"

"It's okay." He sounded tired. "Go back to sleep."

It was kind of hard to having a pair of muscular arms around me and carrying me but I didn't complain, resting my head against his shoulder.

"I'm sorry-" I started to apologize again but he shushed me from saying anything else.

I felt myself being lowered down on my side of the bed and he covered me up with the duvet.

A moment later the bed dipped and I knew it was him, he didn't come closer to me and I took the chance to move closer to him.. he didn't protest against me.

Wrapping his arm around my waist, he placed his chin on top of my head and I sighed in relief. At least he was giving me this. "I'm sorry."

"I know." He mumbled back, it was clear that he needed sleep. "Sleep, we'll talk in the morning."

"Okay." He was fast asleep and my thoughts invaded my privacy but soon they turned into dreams because tomorrow I would face reality.

My eyes dreaded to reopen after feeling the warmth of the sun kissing my face.. it was morning already?

I felt well rested and that was good because I knew when he would wake up he would want to talk.

"Morning."

Spoke too soon.

"Morning." My voice was groggy and my hair, I knew,was a complete mess as my bun was hanging loosely in front of my face, before I untangled my hair from it's hold letting it drape around me.

"I wanted to apologize." I hit the ball into his court first. "I shouldn't have done what I did, it wasn't only me trying to help.. but I can see that, that wasn't the best choice."

"Slow down sweetheart." He groaned as he sat up, he rubbed his face, trying to bring life back into him. "You lost me after 'I wanted to apologize.'"

"Want me to restart?" My fingers began to fidget on their own and his hand came down to stop them.

"I heard you." He rested his head against the headboard, closing his eyes in the process. "Now you listen to me." I gulped oddly loud before taking a deep breath. I was trying to prepare myself for what could be the worst. "I'm not mad at you."

What?

"I was, but I'm not anymore." He caressed my hand and I inhaled before sighing in relief. "But-" He had every right to be mad at me, and I couldn't argue against that.

"Embre.. I did this." The look on his face told me to stop from interrupting him and let him finish, so I did. "I didn't necessarily place you exactly where I wanted you to be in my life, you took matters into your own hands and it's understandable... some what. And me being angry isn't going to tell me what you know, what I need to know. What I've been wondering all my life, and I wasn't man enough to ask her. But you did."

"I felt like I was helping.."

"And you did."

"Not successfully." I mumbled under my breath but he heard me before lifting my head back up to look at him.

"You can tell me."

Wait.. what? I wasn't going to hold the information in for myself because I didn't have the right to but it just felt sudden. "Are you sure?"

"Yeah I think it's time I know." He shrugged but his eyes held so much curiosity for the unknown.

It felt like we had been talking for hours and it was because he had so many questions about what his mother and I discussed, that we tried to solve together. At the end, he grew strangely silent. I could actually hear myself breathing, but I stayed silent letting him observe everything that he needed or wanted to. "I don't know if I can forgive her." He spoke lowly, and if I didn't lean in a bit to hear what he said I would have missed it.

"I'm not expecting you to, if that's what your looking for."

"That's not it." He released my hand while shaking his head. "I don't know how to deal with it."

"You'll know."

I have one thing clear for me, don't get involved anymore. Whenever the time came they would talk.

I was grateful that we had talked about it and that we could move on from this and I was glad he got some closure.. just not all of it, the rest was for his mother to clear up for the questions he didn't have answers to.

"We have the day off what do you want to do?" I changed the subject to something light.

"Many things." His voice held a suggestive tone and I watched as his hand snake around mine again before pulling me on top of him.

"Like what?" Playing coy, I have a tentative roll and I felt him flex underneath me.

Wickedly, he trailed his hand down my thigh to my legs. "You really kill my mood sometimes you know that?"

"Ditto."

"You know I could get you pregnant." He suggested out of the blue and before he could stop me, I rolled off of him and onto the floor.

"W-what did you just say?" I asked him, stunned that those words were uttered from his lips.

"You don't want little Landon's and Embres running around because I do." He added and I feel my face heat up. He talks like this is the usual conversations. I'm only 23 for crying out loud.

"I've thought about it but I never thought you would," I confessed. "We're still young."

"I'm getting older." He reminded me. "And you're the women I want to have kids with."

"Well thank you for letting me know." It felt like a honor that I thought I should bow.

His phone rang. "See if you're going to ruin the mood." He sat up, throwing his legs over the edge. "That's the proper way to do it." He winked before walking out of the room answering his phone.

••

I had a little pep in my step for the rest of the day knowing that he wasn't mad at me and it made me feel giddy.

"You're spending the day with me." He hit the kitchen corner with a purpose, but the look on my face made me change what he said. "I-if you want to." He folded his arms across his chest.

"What do you have in mind?" I asked, picking up an apple from the basket.

"Did you serious pick up an apple?" He looked baffled at my sudden choice.

"Yes?" I took a bite before turning away. "I'm trying to get healthier."

"I don't believe it."

"Believe what you want." Shrugging my shoulders. "I'll be upstairs." I tried to hide my excitement but it just wouldn't go away. I was going on a date.

About twenty minutes later he killed my mood. "What's taking you so long?" He asked me and I turned ready to give him a piece of my mind.. but what I didn't expect was him in casual clothes but he looked good.

"Why do you have to be sexy in everything?" My thoughts rushed out of my mouth before I could take it back.

"Sexy?" He smirked. "Thanks for the compliment."

"N-no that's not what I meant." I tried to take it back but it was no use.

"It's okay baby, I know you thought I was sexy the day we met, to be fair.." He drawled up, stalling closer to me. "I thought you were too, but the only difference is.." His hand ran up my thigh before he started to make a trail. "I had better access to this."

"When did you become inappropriate?" I huffed, my body was not my own anymore.

"I've been like this, I'm just trying to ease you into it." His hand secured itself in my hair, keeping me in place. "What? You don't like it?"

"I never said that.."

He hummed before he started lowing himself down to my level. "You still want to go out? Or do you want to stay and do something else?" He hinted, his thumb skimming over my lips.

"That's not fair.." I couldn't think straight when he was like this.

"It's just a question."

I really really wanted to pick the other option but after everything that happened in the spam of two days I think a date would help us even more, there was always time for later.

"I want to go on a date." I meekly said, looking up at him. "Then we can continue this if you're still up for it."

"Leaving me with blue balls again, I'm starting to think you like teasing me."

"Teasing?" I said shocked before laughing. "Trust me, it's you teasing me."

"Uh huh." He rolled his eyes before leaning down kissing me soundlessly. I felt a swat met my rear and I jumped startled. "Hurry up before I decide for you." And with that he was gone again.

•••

"You hungry?" He asked me after we settled into the car.

"Of course I am." I didn't eat anything last night.

Resting my hand on the arm rest, I began humming the music that was playing and he took it upon himself to turn it up for me.

His hand reached out and took mine in his and I smiled before giving his a soft squeeze and he returned it back.

It was still early that's why he pulled up to our little cafe spot together. I've learned to just let him be a gentleman and let him open my door but I still make fun of it. "You know I can do that myself right?"

"And what kind of gentlemen would I be?" He looked flustered. "Or are you just Miss Independent?"

"Can't go wrong with Neyo."

"Noted."

We walked in together and my perfect little bubble that I thought I had bursted on impact.

"Oh Mr. Hale, how may I help you?" A girl that seemed younger than me came to his aid as if he were dying.

"Table for two." Landon addressed her, indicating his head towards me.

"Okay, right this way." She didn't look my direction once.

"Can we seat in a booth?" I asked him, pointing to one that wasn't occupied and seemed to have been waiting on us.

"I'm not sure if that's reserved or not-"

"Then make it unreserved, I'm pretty sure they won't mind." He commented before sealing his hand around mine, walking us over to where I pointed.

"Okay can I start you guys off with drinks?"

"Can I have... oh that's new. White Chocolate Frappuccino?"

She seemed annoyed by me and my eyes traveled down to her feet to see her right foot taping. "And for you sir?"

"A Caramel Frappuccino."

It was kind of odd that we were ordering that but I guess we just had a taste for something sweet. "You're jealous." Landon broke me out of daze.

"I am not," I state to him and he raised both of his eyebrows at me.

"You're not." He teased me while leaning forward to rest his arms on the table.

"I just don't like her," I shrug, folding my arms.

"Because she's flirting me." He pointed out the obvious.

"Do you want her number because I can go get it for you, I'm pretty sure she's going to be back." I make my way to get up but his hand shot out to stop me.

"Okay, I'm sorry." He beckoned another waitress over, who's name tag read Rebecca, I couldn't catch everything he said to her. "Sorry about that." She apologized before heading in the direction of the kitchen.

"What did you say to her?"

"That we needed someone new, I hope you don't mind?" His voice filled with sarcasm and I glared and appreciated him at the same time.

"I'm sorry for the delay." A waiter came to our table this time with our drinks, his apron stained with food and what seemed to be coffee. "What can I get you?"

I smiled.

••A few hours later••

"Ow!" I shouted for the third time today, he really was punishing me.

"That's what you get." He skated over to me. "Making me jealous."

"You did it first!" I huffed back, standing back up with the aid of the rail.

"You weren't kidding when you said you couldn't skate."

"No shit." I took my time trying to get comfortable of being on skates. "I don't know why you didn't believe me."

"Here." He holds his hand out for me to take.

"And skate around with you while you make me look like a uncoordinated penguin? No thank you." I stand secured with my beloved rail.

"We'll take it slow, baby steps okay?"

"If you make me fall." I narrow my eyes at him. "You'll have more than just blue balls."

He laughed. "It's cute when you try to make threats."

"Try me." Now that I think about, he's never seen me angry before.

He guides me around the rink and I apologies to people that I accidentally bump into in the process.

"See its not so bad." He encouraged me before he did the one thing I told him not to do. "Now you try." He said, letting go of my hand.

"I'm doing it!" I squeal with excitement seeing me keeping my balance but it's short lived when I turn to face him and I once again met the ground, I swear it loves me. I hear him laughing and I look up to see him stop in front of me. "I told you."

"Need help?"

"No I'll just stay on the ground," I reply.

"Come on." He waved his hand twice indicating for me to take it.

I reach my hand out and he takes it but before he could pull me up I pull with all my strength, taking him down and he falls.

Now it's my turn to laugh.

"Floor meet Landon, Landon meet Floor." I fake introduced them between laughter.

"Very funny," He says and I laugh even harder.

He stands up and he skates away from me to the entrance, leaving me he turns around and he gives me a wink.

I try to stand up and I succeed, I quickly try to leave the rolling rink before embarrassing myself I fall twice but I make it out.

"Okay I deserved that." He sits down taking off his skates and I push off the wall, and I make it thankfully.

I sit down next to him and he grabs his other shoes putting them on and I quickly take off mine, slipping on mine. "So where to next?" I ask him.

He stands up with a sigh, clearly spent for the day.

"Well I was thinking going back home, and watching a movie with 'snacks'." He emphasized, putting air quotation around the snack part and I smile.

"Yeah sure, but I get to choose the snacks."

"And that leaves me to the movie?" I did it on purpose to see what he does watch when he isn't busy.

"Don't forget the blanket either." I ran over the guidelines as we headed to a nearby corner store and he seemed to have wanted to take it back at my nagging to not forget.

"Okay I think I've got it all." I went to the countertop placing down all the snacks I wanted that consisted of: sour patch, skittles, Reese's cups, gummy worms, two honey buns, and starburst.

"And you are going to eat all of that?" He asked, handing the man a 10 dollar bill and the man tried to give him back his change but he told him he can keep it but I took it for him. "I don't need that."

"One day you might, instead of overpaying these little bad boys." I held up the two quarters. "Could come in handy."

"It's true." The cashier chimed in and I gave him a high five. With a roll of his eyes, he headed back outside.

"Thank you." I grinned at the man before leaving to follow after my man. "Is someone a little jealous?"

"Not at all, he works at a gas station and if you leave me for that then I don't know what to think."

"It's all about the personality." We settle in. "Okay okay on to the house!" I was giddy with excitement.

"Such a baby." He mumbled.

"But you love this baby." I mocked him and he couldn't hide his smile. "Hey did you take my phone off the aux?"

"Yep." He clicked a few things on his phone before the song came on and I couldn't help but laugh then the most important part of the song came on and surprisingly he sung it. "She's got her own thing, that's why I love her, Miss Independent won't you come in spend a little time.." He trailed off, bringing my hand to his lips.

And I couldn't help but join in even though we didn't harmonize together.

After about a good four songs later we arrived back and it didn't take us long to set up everything.

"So what are we watching?" I asked, coming back down from upstairs after changing my clothes.

"Ted."

"You know this movie is Rated R right?" We settled on the couch together.

""You know I'm a grown man right?"

"Sure you are." I cuddled with the blanket, securing my feet mostly in since they were cold.

"You want me to show you?"

"Shut up the movie is starting." I tried to act like he wasn't affecting me.

"I think your afraid to test that theory."

"Why would you say that?" I ask him and he moved closer to me and I inched back away from me.

"Why are you moving?"

"I'm not." He did it again and to prove I'm not, I stand glued to the spot and he wrapped his arm around me before pulling me closer. "You're not paying attention." I pointed to the flat screen.

Moving forward to reach the snacks on the table I settled for the skittles. "Want some?" I rattled the bag.

"I'm good."

We were barely halfway through the movie when I felt him kiss the side of my forehead, I didn't think much of it while popping another stack of skittles into my mouth.

But he didn't stop, he continued leaving innocent kisses and I looked at him, chewing thoughtfully. "What are you doing?" I asked my voice sounding hoarse and I didn't know if it was because of him or because I didn't have water. Reaching for the remote, he paused the movie. "Hey!"

"Shut up." He didn't give me time to reply, sealing my lips with his. I couldn't breathe and I was clutching on to anything that would make me feel stable in this moment and right now it was my candy.

His hand came around me, positioning me to lay down and he was on me again before I could blink. He kissed me like he was starved and he was a man on a mission tonight. I gave in to him because I craved his touch, I had been since yesterday.