《See Me》Bonus Chapter 13:Z
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I heard the doorbell ringing for the third time. I didn't want to answer it. I didn't want to talk to whoever it would be. I only wanted to talk to one person, and I'm positive that she is not the person ringing my doorbell repeatedly.
How am I positive she's not the one doing it? Because she told me so. I don't want you here, Zane. If she didn't want me there, she surely didn't want to be here.
The words had ripped through me like a perfectly sharpened blade. Just yesterday, everything was perfect. Well, no. Everything wasn't perfect. Everything was a fucking mess, but in that singular moment, it was perfect. It was the best fucking kiss I've ever had in my life. It will be the best kiss of my life, I'm sure of it.
I've been trying so hard to not give in to what my body wanted to do with Seren. I've wanted to kiss her, to hold her, to love her for so many days, but I've been fighting it. I've been fighting it because I had no idea if what she's feeling is true, or if it just appears to be true for the time being.
But, I couldn't fight it anymore. She told me she needed me. And I feel it too, I need Seren, too.
Yet, I come home and call her to find her at Austin's house. Then, she doesn't even want to look at me. How can she need me, if she doesn't even want me anymore?
Maybe... maybe she doesn't need me anymore. Maybe, she's found someone else to need. Maybe that's what she's doing with Austin.
And, I can't even fucking fault her for it. I can't fault her for anything. She's not doing this to hurt me, she's not being malicious. She deserves to find safety in whoever she thinks can provide it for her. I know that, but fuck, does it hurt anyways.
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Ding dong
"For fuck's sake," I muttered to myself, finally accepting that whoever was at the door wasn't going to give up.
I grit my teeth together as I walked to it, waiting to curse whoever it was out for interrupting me from my own self wallowing. I threw the door open, my mouth about to do just that, but Cain's presence caused my plan to be halted.
"What are you doing here?" I muttered, throwing the door open and turning away. Wasn't he supposed to be at homecoming? You know, the one I didn't have a date for. Though, judging by his clothes, it appeared that he was at least on his way. Cain had been here enough times to know that was his open invitation into my home. I made my way back to my couch, throwing my body back down in defeat.
Cain didn't answer, but I heard his footsteps as he walked across the hardwood flooring. He lowered his body onto the couch beside me, and I glanced towards him. He was looking at me curiously, like he was trying to figure me out.
"Well?" I asked harshly, trying to get him to speak.
"What the fuck is going on?" Cain said finally, and I should know what he's talking about, but so much has happened in the last two weeks that it could be any of them.
"What do you mean?" I said blankly, shaking my head in annoyance. This was not a good fucking time, Cain.
"What do I mean?" Cain repeated in a laugh. "What do I mean, he says. You just beat Jax's ass yesterday! You know, one of your good friends? What the hell is going on? Is this about Seren?"
I sat up straight, the sound of his name pumping anger through my veins. "Don't ever, and I do mean ever, mention his filthy fucking name to me again. Do you understand?"
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Cain visibly flinched, probably from the fire coming through my voice. "What the hell happened, man?"
"I'm not talking about Jax," I muttered, relaxing my body again.
Cain's eyebrows scrunched in confusion. "Okay," he said finally, "okay. Do you want to talk about why you're sitting here in the dark and why you look depressed as shit?"
"Not really," I told him, my jaw tensing.
"Well, I'm your friend so I'm going to make you talk about it. It's not hard to put two and two together. You know I drove Seren home yesterday," Cain told me, his words causing my head to flick back towards him.
"Yeah," Cain continued, "I thought that might get your attention. I told her the same thing I'm about to tell you. We don't care if you're together. Well, I mean... maybe, J-A-X does, but not the rest of us. We just miss you guys."
I felt awkward at his words, knowing just how much Cain has liked Seren for years. He seemed genuine, and from the way I knew Cain, he probably was genuine.
I sighed, the remembrance of Seren's words when I went to her house replaying in my head. "We're not together. Not that I don't want to be... it's just... well it's complicated."
"So, you two had a fight?" Cain assumed, and even though he was wrong, I nodded my head anyways. "I guess you have to think about how much she means to you."
"She means everything to me," I said instantly.
Cain raised his eyebrow as he absorbed my words. "Well, shit... I didn't realize it was this serious. If she means everything, then why the fuck are you still sitting here? Go get your girl."
He was right, wasn't he? As if his words were all I needed, I rose to my feet. "Can you let yourself out?"
Cain smiled, "I know the drill. Just, go."
I didn't need him to tell me twice as I bounded out of my house and into my car. I didn't think much as I drove towards her house, except about what Cain had just reminded me of. She was everything, why did I turn away so quickly?
Once I got to her house, I ran towards her front door. I banged against it, with the side of my fist. Though, the force of my movement caused it to open. Instantly, I became suspicious.
I didn't look to see if anyone was home as I ran to her room, I didn't care if anyone was. All I cared about, was that she was sitting safe and sound inside it.
Though, as I pushed the door open, I knew my answer instantly. The blood, the desk flipped over, the papers scattered everywhere.
My shaking hands pulled my phone out as I tried not to vomit, because I was certain that Jax had finally got her.
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