《First one》Eighty-Seven: as gone as they come
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"Hi." Bells sweetly smiled at Zach when he came by our table, her eyes wandering all over the place like she didn't know how to act all of a sudden.
"Hi, Isabella." He said, his eyes scanning her while the corners of his mouth tugged up. What is he smiling at? I felt my happy and relaxed face unwillingly turn into a frown. He's just being nice but still, I'm not in the mood to burst our bubble. "Uuhm, Lukas told me you were looking for a job?" He asked her and right about now I was starting to regret asking him if there was an opening here at the café.
"Lukas." She looked at me her face not telling much apart from surprise and maybe annoyance.
"I'm just trying to help." I shrugged my shoulders before defensively crossing my arms in front of my chest. She was having problems managing her budget just because nothing was coming in. I promised her I was going to help her find a new job so that's exactly what I did, and besides she loves this place and it's also ten times better than that diner. She wasn't taking any other help so I did the only thing I could, open my big mouth and ask Zach.
"I know, but you could have asked me first?" She half rolled her eyes at me.
"Uuhm guys, I suggest you work it out between the two of you, I kind of have to get back to work." He interrupted our conversation for which I was grateful, this argument wasn't something a bystander needed to hear.
"No, she'll listen to your offer." I insisted as I squeezed my eyes at her, Zach's gaze never leaving Bella while I spoke.
Bells scoffed loudly, her lack of sleep coming to the surface now as she gave me a truly annoyed expression. Hell, I'm only trying to help. She never asks anyone for help in the fear of feeling like a burden to someone, but she never could be anything but a blessing, if only she could see that.
Zach's gaze switched between me and her, the tension around this table more electrified than the thunderclouds on the other side of the window. "I just wanted to say that if you're interested you could always come and try, see if you like it and then make your decision." He finally decided to speak.
I was done saying anything to encourage her, now it was up to her. I only cocked my head at her, my eyes wide, urging her to speak up. She rolled her eyes at my, of course, taunting me to get into an unnecessary argument. Come on baby don't be so difficult. "Uuhm, yeah why not." She turned to him and smiled face wide. Oh, so he gets her sweet smile and I get a nasty eyeroll, well that's...nice. I internally wanted to roll my eyes to the moon.
Zach didn't seem to expect the answer she gave him as his face lit up for a brief moment, putting his lips in a straight line after to hide his excitement. "Oh, okay. Are you free at four? Then you can tag along during the last hour of my shift and we can discuss details with the manager if you're interested." Yeah, well, I hope I'm not going to regret this... Can't say I'm jealous, not over someone just being nice to her, thank god someone is being nice to her but still he is a sight for sore eyes and Bells clearly has eyes. Don't be a jealous asshole Lukas. I'm being concerned for nothing, she's just a little bit on edge because she received help she didn't ask for, she never asks...and I want to help.
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"Sure, I'll be here." She said nicely. "Well, back here, I'll be back here." She chuckled nervously, her eyes meeting mine as she must have felt them burn. The only upside to Isabella working with him is that he'll keep an eye out for Drew, remember that. He knows she's your girlfriend. I sure hope he does.
Zach's green eyes and charming smile were only paying attention for her, and that I didn't like. Can you blame me... Everyone can see Isabella is perfect girlfriend material. You would be stupid not to. "Perfect, see you later. I have to get back now, it's always crazy busy in the morning." He smiled, looking at me for once. Yeah that's right I'm here, sitting at the table...with my girlfriend.
"I get it, all these coffee addicts looking for their high. Good luck!" Bella laughed and got a smile form him in return.
"Thanks! See you at four." He smiled before turning around and leaving us in silence, well almost because Bells still had something to say.
"I'll be here!" She echoed after him, making him look back at our table, a smirk pasted on his face. Why the fuck did I just set her up to work with him. I could beat myself in the face for that. I shook my head at the sight of Bella smiling to herself. I don't want to act jealous but she's really making it hard not to. "What?" She huffed, turning her gaze towards me, my posture defensive and a little but offended.
"Nothing." I couldn't help but to lightly scoff at the way she huffed at me. I decided not to argue about it because I didn't want to go to class all stressed out over nothing, but Isabella had different plans.
"No come on, spill it! What did I do to make you look at me like that?" She said frowning her brows, probably referring to the slightly annoyed expression on my face. Fine I'm going to class stressed out.
She took a sip from her coffee, holding it with both her hands as she stared out of the window, completely ignoring my presence. "You didn't need to cause a scene like that. I was only trying to help, and you basically attacked me for it." I shrugged my shoulders, suddenly not hungry anymore as my fingers swatted at the bag of muffins.
She scoffed to herself while never taking her eyes of that damn window. As if fucking rain is so fascinating. "You're overreacting Lukas. You should have asked me if I wanted to work here! Maybe I don't like to work in a coffee house!" She pulled up her shoulders, before putting her cup of coffee back on the table with a thud.
I can't believe she's acting this way; everything was fine this morning. She's always saying I'm the champion of mood swings, but she is in a league of her own when it comes to that. "I don't think you're in a position to be picky about jobs." I let out and quickly got an eyeroll in return. "It's either take whatever the fuck you can get or accept my help, but you don't want that." I said, my tone angry and annoyed, and I sure as hell was. She looked down at her hands resting on the table, avoiding making eye contact with me. "Besides, I don't think you fucking mind working with him." I huffed, leaning back in my chair the moment I noticed my anger had sucked me towards her as I was now almost leaning over the table.
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"What's that supposed to mean?" She said, clearly offended.
"That you couldn't stop flirting with that guy!" I didn't want to believe that she was, but it was better to address the issue before it really became one.
"I wasn't!" She looked and sounded even more offended now, crossing her arms in front of her chest as she leaned back in her chair. "I don't even know him!" She huffed once more, like being here was now bugging her. What the fuck, you don't know him... You sure know him!
"Don't lie to me!" I boiled over, trying to calm down as a clenched my fists and bit my lip. I need to fucking calm down before I smash something! She's lying straight to my face, now I need her to show me I can trust her. "Don't. Fucking. Lie." I gritted trough my teeth. Instead of telling me the truth, being what I wanted to hear, she just sat there staring out of the window into the rain, not even budging when a thundercloud erupted, and thunder shot through the air outside.
I may have pushed it too far. Overreacting is never a great way of dealing with my emotions but I'm feeling fucking angry. Angry that she was acting nice to him and was pissed at me for helping her. We both sat there, drinking our coffee avoiding each other's gaze, the both of us not even thinking about touching the muffins. What a waste!
"Whoa, who died here?" My sister's voice pulled my stare away from the window. Ben and she were standing next to our table, both holding a paper cup of coffee. I knew they had been hanging out and the other night when I left, Ben arrived at our apartment for a movie night with Mia, I strongly wondered if they ever got to seeing a movie in the first place.
"Nobody..." I shook my head, and I saw Bella in the corner of my eyes, nervously shifting in her seat.
"Then why the frown?" Mia shrugged her shoulders, looking back and forth between Bella and I, hesitantly smiling when her eyes met Bella's.
"Just nothing, Mia. No need to worry." I said, dismissively. I wasn't feeling like sharing my business with her right now, not with anybody. My day went from the top of the world to the bottom of hell really quickly...
"Oh woah, Jesus Lukas. I know you're usually not very friendly to people but at least be to her. She's your girlfriend and it looks like you're not even acknowledging she's here. Can't you see she's upset?" She noticed as I tried not to look at Bella the entire time they were standing next to us.
"Mia, don't. He doesn't want to be bothered; you know him. Just let him simmer a bit." Ben said, putting a hand on her shoulder, nodding her to say bye and leave. Yes, my man, please get her out... She just wants to stick her nose in my business and call me out on being jealous for nothing if she finds out why I'm so moody all of a sudden.
"Ben you know me too, I don't care." She shrugged his hand away. Poor guy, he doesn't know what he's dealing with, being with my sister. "Bella, are you okay?" Mia addressed her, her tone sincere, and it made me look at Bells for the first time since either of us wanted to speak to the other. Only now I saw the tears waiting to spill at the corner of her eyes. Fuck, I didn't mean to make her cry...
She nodded, her fingers trying to push back the sadness in her eyes as she rubbed them. "I'm fine." She faintly smiled, deep down dead excited that my sister was finally talking to her and caring even, but that was overthrown by the sadness my words and demeanor had caused. Her attempts to push her tears back failed as she was on the brink of bursting. Fuck... "I have class anyway so I should be going." She said, pushing her chair back while grabbing her jacket and her bag. Mia grabbed her wrist the moment she passed them. "I'm fine, I promise." She whispered and I knew those words meant she absolutely wasn't. She walked away, slipping through Mia's fingers and out the door. Into the fucking rain, she just ran out, into the rain, without eating anything, without her muffins, to get away from me. I'm an asshole... Fuck!
"What the hell Lukas!" Mia huffed as she looked at Bella leaving the shop and disappearing into a fog of rain, thunder still roaring through the sky. My face was blank as soon as I realized what I had done, I did exactly what I decided not to do, which was cause and argument over nothing. Fucking idiot, he was just being nice to him.
"Not now Mia, I need to go..." I hurried, grabbing my keys from my pocket while my other hand latched onto the bag of muffins.
"Be nice!" She yelled after me while I got away, attracting more attention from these coffee addicts than I could appreciate.
Fucking hell, why do I have to be like this, I'm a fool if I think acting this way wouldn't hurt her feelings. It wasn't fun that she was kind of pissed at me first but I didn't have to call her out on it just for being nice to someone and immediately labeling it as flirtatious. I know my Bella, she's nice to everyone she meets. Why the fuck was that bothering me so much then. I searched for my car in the parking lot, fleeing from the rain. I threw the bag of muffins on the seat next to me and quickly drove off towards campus, at the end of a street already spotting a girl with blond wet and entangled hair. I drove past her, stopping the car a little bit further. As soon as I got out to walk into her direction, she changed it. Trying to cross the street to get away from me. "Bella for fucks sake don't walk away. I'm sorry." I said while walking towards her until she was in reach, my hand grabbing her arm while the rain was pouring down on us. An angry look and all of her strength was enough to pull herself free, but I needed to try again. "Baby please, you're going to get sick."
"What, can't your conscious take it that that would be your fault then!" She scoffed while I managed to pull her towards the car, my hands now at her back in an attempt to push her instead of pull, of course her heels digging into the ground making it a slower process than I intended. "Lukas let go of me. Right now, I prefer the rain over you!" She scoffed again while I decided to shut my mouth. All that mattered was getting her in the car with me.
"Baby, please get in." I said as one hand opened the door and the other gave her a little nudge at her back. She scoffed, swatting her flat hand at my chest in anger and annoyance before getting in, taking the bag of muffins from the seat to place them on her lap. Good, she didn't crush them in an attempt to flare up my anger. She wouldn't do that to her food... ever. The thought of her being more protective over food than me kind of made me chuckle and shake my head as I walked to the other side of the car.
I fell into my seat with a huff, quickly turning the key in the ignition, leaving her no chance to change her mind. I turned my head to check the angry look on her face, instead I found a blank expression, her jeans and hair completely soaked, as was my sweater. "Don't look at me like that." She scoffed as she held the bag of muffins tightly to her chest, like they provided her some comfort.
"Like what?" I tried not to sound annoyed or angry. I was curious. How am I looking? I checked in the rear mirror to see how I was looking, all I found was loving, my anger long gone as soon as I realized I was in the wrong. Staying mad at her is beyond impossible.
"Judgmental, condescending, disappointed. Do I need to go on?" She said, her now sad expression meeting mine, but that was nothing she described. It was what her mind tricked her to believe, to believe she was alone, betrayed and abandoned, but she wasn't, I wasn't going anywhere without her.
"Baby I'm sorry. I shouldn't have reacted like that. But be honest neither did you..." This was going to spike her anger, but I had to say it. We were both wrong, we both needed to admit to it.
"Right..." She shook her head and I didn't need to look at her to know she was probably rolling her eyes again. "Why can't you just admit you're a dick sometimes."
"Whoa Snowflake! I am admitting to it but you also have to admit you can be difficult sometimes, and don't expect me to call you the B-word because even if you act like it, I have too much respect for you to call you that!" I huffed, meaning every word. "So thanks for calling me a dick, really? I thought we were past this!"
She squirmed in her seat, nervous and taken aback by my words. "Well, apparently we're now to being jealous. I wasn't flirting with him! Why don't you trust me? You know I love you more than anything!" She let out in one breath.
"I know!" I looked right at her, seeing how my doubts had hurt her more than the actual words. "I'm sorry!" I furrowed my brows, putting my hand on her shoulder and much to my surprise she didn't shrug it away. "I do trust you! I just felt threatened when you were giving him your sweetest smile while you were acting all angry towards me. I didn't like it, I'm sorry. I'm just trying to be honest here." I squeezed her shoulder and I felt her lean into my touch, the feeling more than enough to sooth my worry. "I was just trying to help you..." I said, sliding my hand from her shoulder down her elbow, taking it between my fingers so I could pull her arms from the crossed over position. She completely let me guide her while I kept an eye on the road, my mind only eyes for her though.
I felt her turn to me as my hand unfolded her arms and slid from her elbow to her wrist, guiding her hands into my lap until I could intertwine my fingers with hers, my thumb caressing our beautiful mess of tangled fingers. "I know." She sighed, closing her eyes as I continued to stroke my finger against our fingers. "I just..." She sighed again, before I gave our hands a gentle squeeze, letting her know I would listen and that she could tell me even though wanted to hold back. "I have always taken care of myself... I just don't know how the let myself be cared for Lukas. It's hard... The moment I accept help I feel like taking advantage of someone, I feel like I'm being a burden or dead weight you have to drag along...I don't want you to see me like that, like I'm a nuisance, a block of cement dragging you down. I don't want to drown you with my problems."
"But you won't! If anything, you light up my life with you just being you, your problems included. I don't care how hard things get, I'm here. Baby, you don't have to do this alone." I brought our hands up to my lips, kissing the back of her hand, hoping this was the last time I needed to tell her that. "You don't have to do anything alone. Together dodging meteors." I grinned remembering when I told her that it would only be over between us when a meteor fell from the sky in that very moment. Now they could fall all they want, we would dodge them together. I still felt the same way about her being endgame, she was the first true and also very last for me and if it wasn't her, it was going to be nobody.
She immediately chuckled at my words wiping away the tears from her face. I knew she would remember it too. "I'll try. I really will try." She smiled and the panic, fear and anger that filled me minutes ago was now completely gone. "I'm sorry for lying. I do know Zach."
"I know." I smirked at her. Wondering about the look on her face I briefly looked at her, her expression a mixture of shock and fear.
"What do you mean you know?" She frowned her brows, pulling our hands onto her lap next to the bag of muffins while I parked the car at one of the parking lots on campus.
"You must have left quite the impression when you went to see Drew that night after he beat me up, because he was worried, asking how you were. Now, don't ask me how he knew me b-"
"After you hit Drew in the face with that tray in the cafeteria, I'm pretty sure everybody knows you." Her words, followed by a chuckle, cut me off and it made me join her laughter. Okay that may be true.
"He's the one who told me Drew had gone off the radar. He's keeping an eye out for him too. The fact he cares enough to protect you made me feel threatened earlier but it's also the reason I want you to work in the cafe with him. I know he won't hurt you and would keep Drew at a distance if necessary. No matter how menacing it feels to me personally, to us, it's a good idea." I sighed, admitting I didn't like it but it didn't matter, as long as she was safe.
"I didn't tell you I knew him or bring up that night because I want to leave it behind me. And he isn't a threat. I won't let anyone come between us." She leaned in, her hand letting go of mine to bring it to my face and stroke my cheek softly with the back of her fingers.
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