Derek and I sit in his bed, him behind me, his arms tightly holding my body back against his chest. Leaning back, he rests his chin on my head and presses light kisses to me. They almost send shivers through me at how good it feels to be back with Derek.

"Did he hurt you Elle? The doctor is coming to dress your wrist but... did he... do anything else."

I swallow hard, knowing what he is insinuating. "No he didn't touch me, not like that at least." Turning my neck, I look up into his eyes so he can read my face, "he said I was too fat for him to touch. I disgusted him." Derek goes to speak and negate everything I had been told but I press a finger to his parted lips before he can. "I know they were lies, but I'm glad he thought them."

We both laugh slightly at that, I think more out of relief than genuine amusement. "I did hit my head this morning and knocked myself out, so maybe doc should check that."

Derek kisses my cheek and nods. "Yes we'll definitely tell him that, I don't want anything else to happen to you... ever again." I smile and snuggle deeper into his chest again, stroking his hand as it holds onto my arm.

There's a knock at the door and Derek calls to come in, Doc appears in the door with a relieved smile on his face at the sight of me back again.

"Hello Elle, I'm just here to check you out and things ok?"

"Of course." I smile and move from Derek's lap ignoring the way he tried to initially cling even tighter to me.

Doc dresses my wrist with some soothing balm and wraps it in soft cotton, telling me to keep it on for only three days or so. He also checks me for a concussion which by some miracle, considering the lights I saw, I don't have one.

"Good to have you back Elle." He says as we wave and thank him out the door. I collapse back onto the bed and look up at Derek.

"Can we nap?" I beg, attempting puppy eyes but I'm fairly sure I look deranged. Derek grins and practically bounds into the bed, nearly dislodging me. I giggle and squeal even though just this morning I was still trapped in that house, I can already feel Elijah's touch and presence being washed away.

I scramble under the sheets and sigh as Derek's scent surrounds me, the bed dips and for half a second I freeze. My brain forgetting it isn't Elijah, but I soon reverse into the shape of his body and he wraps one arm over my chest, cupping my breast, the over slung over my waist. He pulls me against him possessively and buries his face in my neck and hair.

For a while his breath tickles but it soon sends me off to sleep, the first restful one I've had in months.

I wake to a sickness in my stomach, bolting from the bed I practically hurl myself into the bathroom and open the toilet lid just in time. Warm hands take my hair and hold it away from my face, the other rubs up and down my body in calming strokes. Once the sickness has passed I collapse against Derek's hard chest and take in deep breaths.

"What was that smell?" I whimper, squeezing my eyes shut as I try not to remember the smell, knowing it will only bring on another bout of nausea.

"It was some toast baby, your stomach was growling in your sleep so I thought you were hungry. I'm so sorry. I thought it would help."

I can hear the guilt in Derek's voice, he's always way too hard on himself. When I was in the car on my way back here I heard his distressed muttering that it was all his fault. It nearly broke my heart.

"It's ok Der, you didn't do anything wrong it's just..." I trail off, not wanting to mention anything to him until I'm absolutely certain it's what I suspect. "It's just a stomach bug or something."

Derek sighs deeply, worry etched on his face, clearly not entirely convinced.

"Could you get Astrid for me?" I ask as Derek rubs his hands up and down my arms.

"Yes... why?"

Think Elle, think. Lying was never a strong skill of mine, and I'm not lying to Derek exactly, more omitting the truth to him.

"Oh uh, just to thank her for being there with us when you found me." It's a plausible, convincing answer especially since we had gotten quite close before I was taken.

"Sure baby." Derek chuckles and stands, I scoot around on my bottom to face him instead of the toilet. He holds a hand out for me but I shake my head.

"Make sure that..." I groan as I try to say the word "that- that smell is gone!" I exclaim desperately, I do not want to be sick again but if I even think about it too hard I know I will be.

Derek kisses my nose lightly and then leaves the bathroom. I hear the chink of a plate being picked up and then Derek's voice. "Nasty smell, dealt with. Astrid, pending."

I giggle as I hear the sound of the door closing and carefully stand from the floor, I close the lid of the toilet and sit on it. Grabbing the toothbrush I was using before I was taken. He even kept my toothbrush all this time. Such a little gesture, and yet it warms me.

Cleaning the taste of sickness from my mouth feels amazing and cleansing. I have always hated being sick, even had anxiety about it when I was younger but, if this is what I think it is I'm going to have to get used to it.

It takes about five minutes for Astrid to arrive, she knocks quietly on the door and I throw it open eagerly. She beams at me and holds my hand tightly giving it a friendly squeeze.

"Derek said you wanted to speak to me?" She begins as I close the door behind her and we both move to sit on the bed. Nodding, I bite my lip and grab a cushion holding it against my stomach.

"Yeah I uhhh sort of need a favour." I mumble, it's weird that I'm coming to Astrid for this considering she's nearly 5 years younger than me, but we seem to get along fine.

"You can ask for anything Elle." She smiles sweetly at me, "literally anything. I'm pretty sure Bear would buy me a yacht to burn if I asked him."

We both giggle at that and I realise how good it feels to laugh again.

"Well, I don't need a yacht. I need a pregnancy test."

Astrid's mouth drops open in surprise and she looks down at my stomach in fear. "Is-is it your ex's? Did he force you?" Her voice is tight with rage and remorse so I quickly reassure her.

"It's Mouse's. My ex didn't touch me." I'm quite proud of myself by remembering to use his biker name around other people, he explained it to me before I was taken and I bones would have forgotten if Astrid hadn't called her husband Bear. That reminded me.

"It's his!" She exclaims and clutches my hands together excitedly. "He's going to be over the moon. I mean seriously, that man loves babies."

"If I'm pregnant." I break off her excited word flurry with the truth I was thinking about.

"Oh yeah, if." She responds. "Let's get you that test."

She pulls out a phone and texts someone quickly. After she puts it away she smiles back at me. "Who did you text?"

"Oh just a prospect, it's his job to get what I need if Bear can't leave with me. He won't tel anyone."

"Oh ok, I just don't want D-Mouse to find out if I'm not." Astrid nods understandingly and holds my hand again.

"Are you alright Elle, I mean really ok."

"Yeah, surprisingly I am ok. He's not coming back is he?"

Astrid flushes and looks to the floor, crossing her feet uncomfortably. "No he's definitely not coming back, the boys saw to that."

It's funny how the smallest youngest member of the club is calling a group of hairy, massive bikers boys. But it works, they are all wrapped around her little finger and I can see why. She has the purest heart I've ever known.

Our conversation drifts to other things-mainly Bear and Mouse- when we hear a heavy pair of footsteps dashing towards the door. We both look at each other confused. Bear bursts through the door panting with wild eyes.

"Why do you need a pregnancy test?" He demands panically whilst looking at Astrid. His hair is unkempt and he looks exhausted, like he ran here at speed.

Astrid bursts into a fit of giggle and falls over on the bed, clutching at her stomach as she laughs at the sight of her husband, utterly terrified by the idea of another baby.

"It's-not-for-me." She gets out between giggles, Bear's face falls.

"Oh." He awkwardly rubs the back of his head and looks around, obviously embarrassed.

"But it's good to know where you are on the whole idea of another baby."

Bear's face returns to one of panic and he rushes to sit beside Astrid on the bed. He grips her hands and turns her face to look at him.

"It's not that I don't want another baby with you.. it's just... these kids are eating me alive baby. Liam is walking like a demon, I can hardly keep up with him and Eira, she screams all the time. I-I just can't have another under two."

I almost awe at how sweet he is on his wife, I take his point. Two children under two must be a struggle, adding a newborn to the mix is definitely not something I would aim for in my life.

Astrid smiles and strokes his stubbled cheek. "I know baby, it's for..." She looks over at me for permission to tell him, I nod. "It's for Elle, but you can't tell Mouse anything or hint about it ok!"

She points a finger in his face, warning him about it and I'm so grateful for that. If I am pregnant I want to tell Derek myself and if I'm not then Derek doesn't need to know, we'll have children at some point and I'll tell him then.

Bear looks at me and smiles warmly but formally, like he's respecting any boundaries I may need. If I was ever in doubt of how perfect he was for Astrid, I'm not anymore.

"Can I steal you away baby?" He begs her and tugs on her top like a needy child wanting a hug.

"No, Vi, shit I meant Bear! Elle needs someone with her and I need to have words with that prospect for telling you."

Bear looks guiltily at Astrid before clearing his throat. "I'm on that text chain too baby, just so I know you're ok."

"You're what?"

Ok I'm seriously starting to feel like I shouldn't be here, I stand and go into the bathroom. Leaving them to finish this conversation in private.

After a few minutes the voices stop and I leave the bathroom expecting Bear to be gone. Instead he's pressing kisses all over Astrid's face whilst tickling her sides as she giggles and squirms.

I freeze. Feeling seriously uncomfortable about walking in on this. I try to sneak back into the bathroom but Bear hears. He spins around and looks at me, clears his throat and leaves the room rather sheepishly.

Astrid presses her hands to her flushed cheeks and sighs at the closed door.

"I know he looks like an intimidating bear but he's really a total teddy bear."

I nod in agreement, he really does seem to be a teddy bear, but only with his wife and kids I suspect. I wouldn't want to be on the receiving end of his wrath or hurt someone he loved.

"Mouse is like that too." I venture bravely, never really one for gossip before now. "I mean I know he's all soft around your children and you too but when I first saw him I was really scared."

Astrid raises an eyebrow. "Is that so?" She grins at me, "because the way he tells the story is you told him to fuck off in every way but verbally. Hmmm."

I grin at Astrid and settle beside her on the bed. "Ok maybe I was pissed as well. But come on he went all alpha male on me before I even knew him!"

Astrid pokes my ribs playfully. "I bet you like him being ball alpha male now though don't you." With every word she continues to tickle me until I'm shrieking with laughter, I'm really pleased I got Derek to fetch her. If she wasn't here I'd be freaking out right about now.

"I can stay with you while you take the test, Elle. Or I can leave you alone. Whatever you need."

"Thank you Astrid, I'd quite like someone to be with me."

She squeezes my hand and then lets it go. We both wait for the knock at the door from the prospect, we talk about Eira and Liam mainly and I know I can't wait to properly meet them and hold them.

"Of course you'll have to fight half the club off to get Eira." Astrid chuckles, "that girl has the worst set of over protective uncles I swear. They fight each other to hold her! Or make her smile first or even just to put her hat back on after it falls off."

We both laugh freely at that, a tiny baby with an entire club of men fighting for her attention. Our laughter is cut off by a formal knock at the door.

Astrid stands to answer the door.

"Whatever it says Elle, it will be ok."