I stared at Alex effortlessly across the table as he was eating his food. I felt as I didn't appreciate him the way he deserved. Truth was, I didn't deserve him.

He deserves someone better, someone who could give him one hundred percent. I knew that wasn't me. My heart no longer belonged to him.

Yet, I was willing to try. It wasn't that I was leading him on. I was just trying to get the chemistry back. We had to much of a history to let it all go.

"Mhmm, this is delicious ." I say, before shoving a spoonful of rice in my mouth.

"I know, right." He mumbles.

He grabbed his water, washing down his food and wiped his mouth with a napkin. There was a moment of comforting silence before Alex spoke again.

"You know, I've been meaning to ask about Jax." He says.

My heart sinks. I look up at him to see him looking at me with a blank expression.

"What about him?" I ask, not wanting to show him I cared too much.

"He seemed weird when he was at your house." He says.

"He was looking for Hunter." I lie. "Something about Rebecca. You know how he is."

My insides knotted as I lied to him knowing very well it was wrong. I couldn't tell him the truth. I couldn't say Jax went over trying to fix whatever was between us. It's all in the past. I was trying to move forward.

"Rebecca and him are still dating?" He sounds surprised.

"Yeah, almost a month." I nod.

He huffs, slightly shaking his head. "He'll cheat on her sooner or later. You know how he is."

"Actually, I forgot to tell you." I wipe my mouth, swallowing the rest of my food. "Rebecca cheated on him with Hunter."

Alex's eyes pop out of his head as he takes in the news. "Hunter told you?"

"Nah, I called him and Rebecca was talking in the background. He doesn't even know that I know." I explain.

"Wow, I expected it from Jax but Rebecca?" He breathes out. "And your brother? They're best friends."

"I know."

"What are you going to do?" He asks as he continues to eat. It was like this was his entertainment as he ate.

"What do you mean?" I question.

"Well, are you going to tell Jax?" He says, pointing out the obvious.

I shrug, tapping my finger against my now empty plate. "It's not my business."

"It's not your business but Jax has a right to know. If it was reversed and you were cheating on me I'd like to know. Wherever the source is coming from." He says.

"I'm not cheating on you." I say, offended that he used me as an example.

I felt guilty that I had different occasions where I almost did cheat. Yet, nothing ever happened.

"I didn't say you were. I'm just saying Jax has a right to know." He says.

He was right. Jax needed to know the truth, whether it meant going behind Hunter's back. It wasn't fair, and it definitely wasn't fair to Alex.

Alex needed to know the truth. He deserves to know about my almost cheating incident with Jax. Even though Alex had cheated in the past it wasn't right for me to do that.

"I have to tell you something." I blurt out.

Just as I was about to speak again his phone rings, interrupting my only chance to tell Alex the truth.

Answering the phone, he holds his finger up to me telling me to wait. Tuning out his conversation my mind wanders off to Jax.

Maybe it wasn't the best idea to push him away. I could have left things the way they were but I knew if I did I would have cheated on Alex long ago. I couldn't carry out this relationship if I knew I had unfinished business with Jax.

Ending things with Alex would mean losing everything we had. He was an amazing boyfriend and I knew things weren't always perfect with us but it was better than how Jax ever treated me.

"What were you saying?" Alex says, hanging up the phone.

"Uh," I hesitate, thinking if I should break the ice now. "You know, I can't remember."

He raises his eyebrows. "Are you sure? It seemed important."

I shrug. "It'll probably come back later."

"Anyways, back to Jax, when are you telling him?" He asks.

"Enough talk about him. Tonight's our night I don't want to ruin it by talking about that." I grab his hand from across the table and interlock our hands together.

"You're right," He smiles. "Let's talk about something else."

The night carried on without a single thought of Jax or our conversation drifting away. We were on our way back to my house when Alex looked over at me, a grin plastered on his face.

"What?" I smile.

"Is Hunter home?" He asks.

"I dont think so, why?" I ask.

"Your dad?"

"Working." I smile, looking at him as I knew what he was thinking of.

As we approach my house Alex parks his car and shuts it off. He jumps out, coming to my side and opens the door.

Giggling, I thank him before I'm embraced by his arms and swept off my feet.

"Alex!" I laugh.

Going up the stairs, I hand him the keys and he manages to unlock the door. He sets me down and closes the door behind him.

Grabbing him by the hand, I lead him to my room and take my shoes off in the process.

"Hunter?" I call out.

When there was no answer Alex and I smile to ourselves, closing my bedroom door.

He took his shirt off, pressing his body against mine and laid me down on my bed. His hands roamed my body, finding their way to the back of my dress.

Unzipping it, he slides it down my legs. Slowly, he trails kisses up my thighs and runs his hands throughout my body.

"I love you." He whispered.

Closing my eyes, I let my head sink into the pillow and grab onto my bed sheets, digging my fingers down.

He brought his lips to mine, matching my same rhythm. Our tongues danced together, as our bodies rocked back and forth.

He took his boxers off, followed by my underwear and let our bodies collide with each other. He moved his hand to my back, pulling me closer and pushing himself inside of me.

"Jax." I let out as he continues to move inside me. He grabs my hands above my head and I begin to lose myself in him. "I love you so much."

"Emma," Alex moans.

Once we both finish, Alex climbs off of me and rolls over to the empty spot next to me. I smile to myself as I turn to him and rest my head on his chest.

"You're amazing." I kiss his naked chest.

My legs wrapped around his as we laid under my bed sheets and we stayed in silence. Alex ran his hand up and down my arm, sending shivers down my spine.

There was nothing else I would trade for this moment. Everything seemed right in the world again.

"Can I ask you something?" Alex speaks.

"Mhm." I mumble.

There was a long pause before he sighed and sat up.

"Why did you say Jax's name?"