𝒥𝑒𝓃𝓃𝒾𝑒

School ended about 20 minutes ago and I was now standing in front of my house hesitating to step in

I couldn't help but grow worried about wether or not my mom was home right now

Slowly I opened the door and stepped inside, I locked the door behind me and walked towards the living room

The house was a mess

The table had dirty cups and bowls all over it, there was trash all over the floor, some stuff were even broken

My mom never cleans up after herself

I walked over to the table to start cleaning and I noticed 3 plastic bags that contained white powder inside

It was cocaine

Why is there cocaine here, I thought my mom stopped taking any type of drugs

I heard footsteps, looking up I saw my mom storming down the stairs, towards me

She snatched the bags from my hand and was looking at me with a angry look

"What the fuck are you doing touching my shit!"

She looked even more mad than usual

"I didn't mean to touch your stuff, um w-why do you have that?" I pointed at the plastic bags of cocaine in her hand

"Oh so now you wanna be in my fucking business Jennie!" She started walking towards me with a angry look across her face

Not this again please stop

"M-mom I'm sorry I was just worried about you I swear, please just calm down"

"Mom It's just, it's not good for you and I care about you" I said again

"Guess what Jennie just because you care about me doesn't mean I fucking care about you, you think your a good person? You're not Jennie! Your a pathetic dumb bitch that can't talk to people properly, your the fucking reason your dad is dead, It's your fucking fault you bitch!

"It's not my fault he's dead!" I felt tears run down my face at the mention of my father

"Don't fucking yell at me! It's your fault, everything bad it's your fucking fault! Everyone dislikes you Jennie, keep that thought in your head because it's true, your disgusting!"

"Fuck you! It's not my fault he's dead!" I yelled back

Please stop Just fucking stop

All of a sudden she grabbed a glass cup from the table and swung it across my face

I felt my blood and tears run down my face, but I didn't make an effort to stop her

Because maybe I do deserve this

Maybe my fathers death was my fault

God why can't she just fucking kill me already

She was yelling at me I'm not sure what she was saying my brain was stuck on my thoughts

Suddenly she grabbed the collar of my shirt and pushed me back to the floor

"Take your fucking shirt off right now! I'm gonna show you what happens when you disrespect me" she yelled

I couldn't help it but more tears were running down my face

"Mom please, I'm sorry I won't do it again, please don't do this" I cried

That didn't stop her, it never stops her

She pulled my shirt off and went to stand behind me while I was sitting on the floor with blood running down my face

She started laughing

"All these scars on your back" her laughter grew

"You see how disgusting you are, how ugly you fucking are!" she said again

Before I could process what was gonna happen I felt a belt come down across my back

No matter how much I cried or begged she never stopped

Because I deserve this

She kept striking the belt down my back, probably adding more scars to the ones I already have

About 40 minutes passed and she finally stopped

She didn't say anything to me she just walked back upstairs leaving me on the floor with blood running down my body

I dragged myself to my room and went into the bathroom leaving a trail of blood behind me

My eyes started watering again as I looked at myself in the mirror

There was a scar running above my eyebrow

I didn't even bother looking at my back knowing I would probably get disgusted from myself

After showering and washing the blood off, I was in my bed laying on my stomach, I couldn't lay down on my back due to the fact that it still hurt

My eyes were watering again and tears filled my pillow

I wish someone would take me away from myself

Because I don't know how much longer before I give up

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IM NOT SURE HOW I FEEL ABOUT THIS PARAGRAPH BUT I HOPE YALL LIKE IT