𝒥𝑒𝓃𝓃𝒾𝑒

It was about 2:50 pm and I finally made it home, school ended about 20 minutes ago

My mind kept running back to what happened with Aaron today

I don't know why I couldn't get it off my mind while I was walking back home

I'm pretty sure he hates me and I'm starting to hate him too

Or atleast I think I am

Walking in the house I locked the door behind me and stepped in towards the living room

I'm really hoping my mom isn't home right now

But my hope is gone as soon as I see a man laying on our couch

I recognized him

Tears swelled up in my eyes as I stood there frozen

My mom suddenly came into view wearing nothing except a towel wrapped around her

"Why the fuck is he here!" I said growing infuriated

"Josh is here because me and him had some fun, and don't raise your fucking voice at me!"

"Are you serious right now, I know you hate me but your still my mother! How can you do this to me!" I yelled as tears began falling down my face

Looking back at the couch Josh woke up

The same man that used to come in my room every night just so he can touch me and hurt me

I was 12

I remember those night clearly, I remember calling out for my mom every time, hoping she would come and stop him

She never came

He stood up while his eyes trailed down my body

"Jennie it's been a while I see your all grown up now" he said causing me to grow disgusted

I looked back at my mom while tears kept falling down my face

"Fuck you, fuck you and him!" I said growing enraged

"What the fuck did you just tell me! What did I say about raising your voice at me!" She said stepping towards me

In a flash her hand gripped my throat harshly

It was getting harder and harder to breath that I was sure my face was turning purple

My vision blurred with tears as I begged her to stop but she didn't, my heart won't stop racing as my ears started hurting from her screaming

Josh came behind her with a smile on his face enjoying this

She finally let go on my throat as I fell onto the floor trying to catch my breath

She looked down at me as she started ripping my shirt off

Please stop

She revealed the scars she gave me on my back as she started laughing

"You see this! This is a fucking reminder of how disgusting you are!"

I couldn't take this anymore

I tried standing up to get away but suddenly Josh came into view and pushed me back down to the floor

He came on top of me straddling my hips and I started panicking

No

Please no this can't happen again

I looked over to my mom she was just standing there with no emotion on her face

I kept trying to push him off, I was yelling, crying, but he didn't move

His hands gripped my wrists as he placed them back onto the floor

Why is this happening to me again

What did I ever do to deserve this

He started undoing his belt as I kept begging him to stop

He let go of my wrist and I quickly brought my fist up to his jaw

He fell back to the floor and I immediately got up throwing my shirt back on and heading for the door

I heard my mom yelling as I felt Josh following me

I ran as fast as I could trying to get away

I don't know where I'm going, I have no where to go but I need to get away from here

After running for a few minutes I turned into an alley and leaned against the wall trying to catch my breath

I sat down on the cold hard floor trying to stop the tears flowing out my eyes

It felt like it was getting harder to breath

Why can't my mom just kill me

Why can't I just kill me

I felt terribly tired

I feel like I'm drowning, being pulled under the waves

Except this sea isn't made of water

It's made of hopelessness and pain

But it's my fault

Maybe if I was different

I hated feeling unimportant to the people that were important to me

All I want to do right now is scream and cry and let it all out because it's killing me inside

Everything is my fault

I slowly stood up and headed out of the alley walking on the side of the street

Where am I supposed to go now?

I cant go back home

I kept walking as I heard a car pull up next to me causing me to grow anxious

I started walking faster as I felt the car following me

I quickly looked back meeting the drivers gaze causing me to grow confused

What the fuck

Aaron?

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