chapter twenty-two – hospital visits and apologies

"What are you looking at?" I rolled my eyes at Marc's blatant staring.

"My beautiful girlfriend" Marc just smiled at me.

I blushed at his words and scoffed.

"Shut up" I shoved a fry in my mouth.

"I'll shut up but I won't stop being amazed by your face" Marc grinned at my blush.

"I hate you" I glared at his dumb face.

"I love you too" Marc laughed.

"Hey, so if you two don't work out, can I have him?"

"Shut up Charlie" I smiled at Marc.

I took a deep breath as I made my way up the pathway.

Everything will be okay, Thea. Don't worry. You need to do this.

For Marc. For Kevin. For the entire Preston family.

I can do this.

Knock, Knock, Knock.

I waited patiently for the door to open. Dreading the looks I'm going to get.

"Hey, Tee" I breathed a breath of relief at Summer's voice.

"Hi, Summer" I gave her a small smile.

"Marc hasn't been released from the hospital yet. They want him to stay until... until they figure out why he can't walk" Summer explained. She looked exhausted. Like she hasn't been sleeping.

"I-I'm here to talk to Kevin" I dig my nails into my palm.

"Oh" Summer furrowed her eyebrows.

"I said a lot of stuff before we found out about Marc. A lot of stuff that isn't true. I just need him to know that I didn't mean it" I awkwardly explain as I walk inside the foyer.

"He's in his room" Summer nods up the stairs.

I start making my way upstairs and every time I pass a smiling photo of Marc, my heart clenches.

I watch him grow up in each picture. And once I reach the top step, I have tears in my eyes. I could have ended all of that. He could have died because of me.

Because of me...

"Hey" I spoke quietly as I opened the door to the triplet's room.

Kevin was sitting on the top bunk. I took in all the details.

Kevin had football posters on the walls surrounding his bed along with a few posters of provocatively dressed women. His varsity jacket was hanging over the side.

Devin's bunk wasn't decorated much differently. The only thing missing was the posters of women. But the badly hidden magazines sticking out from under his mattress made up for those.

Marc's bed was opposite Devin's. Band posters were on his wall. Matt's old leather jacket was laying on top of his pillow and there was an old guitar leaning against his nightstand.

Marc was always left out. He was different than his brothers.

It was always Kevin and Devin vs. Marc.

"Hey" Kevin replied.

He didn't sound happy nor arrogant. Like he always sounded.

His voice sounded dull. Void of any happiness.

"How are you doing?" I asked but he just looked at me with raised eyebrows. "Yeah, I know."

"I'm sorry for... everything"

My eyebrows shot up at Kevin's words. I wasn't expecting that.

"I don't think I ever actually liked you in that way. I just didn't want Marc to have something I couldn't" Kevin explained.

"But you have everything" I furrowed my eyebrows.

"Marc was always Dad's favorite. Until the accident. After that, he just reminded him of Matt. But 9 years of watching your Dad put your brother on a pedestal... it's hard to get out of habit" Kevin shrugged.

"It's not your fault" I sigh.

"Really? Marc wouldn't have been freaking out if I hadn't kissed you" Kevin snorted. "He was in that ditch for hours because of me. No one else"

"Kevin. I know that I said it was your fault at the party but it isn't. I was scared. I was hurt. But the only reason Marc was in that ditch was because he was speeding"

"So you're blaming Marc?" Kevin's eyes narrowed.

"No. I'm blaming everyone" I sigh.

"What do you mean?"

"Marc... He has problems. Actual problems that everyone should have picked up on. Your parents should have got him help. We should have picked up on the signs. But we didn't. Your family... Your family went through something traumatic. Summer and Matt were the focus of everyone's attention because they were the pinpoint of the trauma. But there were ripples. That affected all of you" I explain.

"You all need help. Before something else happens"

"I know" Kevin's voice breaks.

"So, stop blaming yourself, Kev. You did something fucked up. And something bad happened. But that was going to happen. If not then, soon. Marc always said that I was helping him. But he was still in a bad place. A relationship can't fix years of mental illness. He's going to need professional help but right now...he needs his brother." I continue my rant. "He needs you to stop trying to steal everything he has. He needs you to be there for him."

Kevin nods and starts to climb down from the top bunk.

"Thanks, Tee" He pulls me into a hug and for a minute I stand there frozen. "I'm sorry-"

"It's fine" I sigh and hug him back. "We're all going through a tough time right now. We need each other. All of us"

"I'm going to see Marc. Do you want to come?" Kevin pulls away.

"Marc doesn't want me there" I swallow the lump in my throat.

"He hasn't spoken to me since that night. I'm allowed there when Mom brings the kids but he ignores me" Kevin glared down at his feet. "But we should go. Explain what happened. I need to apologize. And you guys need to talk"

"Do you think it's a good idea to do that together?" I furrowed my eyebrows.

"Not really. But Summer's coming and he can't say no to her" Kevin gave me a small smile and I let out a tiny laugh.

"Fine, I'll come."

"Great. We're leaving at 4:30" Kevin said.

"Kev it's 4:25" My eyes bulged out of my head. "We're doing this now?"

"Yep!"